Playing catchup with social life compared to your peers, wondering whats right.
06-20-2018, 11:48 PM
Social life post college is going to take a hit each year. Friends become unavailable, people work and just hang around with their girlfriend / spouse / children. People become increasingly miserable post college. In college everyone is or should be having fun. Everyone still has a great view of a world filled with opportunities. Then most of those people post college start working a stressful job for a wage that barely allows them to make ends meet. I'm not sure if this a North American issue or a worldwide issue. I suspect its more prevalent in the 1st world due to the life patterns people follow of College ---> Job --> girlfriend / fiancee around 22-25) ---> children around 30.
I have had a good business for a while and I can tell you college for me was miles funner than making a bunch of money. However the sacrifices I made after college will allow me to have potentially a more fun life by the time I'm 30 (I'm close) then I had even in college. The more money = more happiness dilemma that a ton of people fall for if not the majority isn't really true. The increased value you'll get from each additional amount of money you make will become near redundant. What really makes people happy is socializing and being with other people you enjoy being with. It really doesn't matter if you drink a $500 bottle of champagne or a $30 bottle of whisky. The enjoyment you get is the people around you. Unfortunately as we age in North America we make plenty of decisions as a society that increasingly reduce are social time.
As an example in Cuba a couple weeks ago I got taxis to and from a nightclub, pizza afterwards, paid 2 covers, got bottle service and spent $20. I've had a similar night in Canada where my bank account has been $1,000+ shorter than it was the night before. I didn't have anymore fun than I did with $20. Even in Canada the nights where you get drunk with your buddies at house parties and spend $20 on booze are just as much fun if not more than the nights where you spend significantly more. If you ask me my ideal night it would probably involve a bottle of whisky, friend(s) and a night out chasing tail or coming home to it. I don't need to be super rich to do that.
If you haven't had the chance its probably worth reading this post involving a popular parable of the Mexican Fisherman and the Banker. thread-37568...#pid765978
You probably will be best to join groups with similar interests especially groups that will have nights out. (For example a dance school) Its tough though to make real friends post college. Keep in mind all it takes is one great friend who is available. One great friend that is available is 10x more valuable than dozens of acquaintances.
One of things I fail to understand is why we don't see more guys who are in a LTR or married even with a kid in one country and single in other places / countries. That to me is the ultimate set up if you can swing it from my perspective. My daughter gives me more happiness than anything else in the world but I also enjoy being able to drink freely with the guys and not worry about getting home by a certain time.
Some professionals and business owners will be able to do this by attending "conferences" all over the place. (Even monthly) Or by having a business in two separate locations. Others who are location independent can have a kid in Thailand and go wild in Philippines for example. You get the love and affection that we need and you get to the excitement and joy of the freedom and chase.
One of the things as people will age is they will still probably like the same things they liked when they were younger...food, friends, fuck, events, drink, sex, travel. The problem is society in all kinds of ways pressure us to follow the American dream and even if you don't buy in the vast majority of friends you've had growing up if not all of them will buy in.
I have had a good business for a while and I can tell you college for me was miles funner than making a bunch of money. However the sacrifices I made after college will allow me to have potentially a more fun life by the time I'm 30 (I'm close) then I had even in college. The more money = more happiness dilemma that a ton of people fall for if not the majority isn't really true. The increased value you'll get from each additional amount of money you make will become near redundant. What really makes people happy is socializing and being with other people you enjoy being with. It really doesn't matter if you drink a $500 bottle of champagne or a $30 bottle of whisky. The enjoyment you get is the people around you. Unfortunately as we age in North America we make plenty of decisions as a society that increasingly reduce are social time.
As an example in Cuba a couple weeks ago I got taxis to and from a nightclub, pizza afterwards, paid 2 covers, got bottle service and spent $20. I've had a similar night in Canada where my bank account has been $1,000+ shorter than it was the night before. I didn't have anymore fun than I did with $20. Even in Canada the nights where you get drunk with your buddies at house parties and spend $20 on booze are just as much fun if not more than the nights where you spend significantly more. If you ask me my ideal night it would probably involve a bottle of whisky, friend(s) and a night out chasing tail or coming home to it. I don't need to be super rich to do that.
If you haven't had the chance its probably worth reading this post involving a popular parable of the Mexican Fisherman and the Banker. thread-37568...#pid765978
You probably will be best to join groups with similar interests especially groups that will have nights out. (For example a dance school) Its tough though to make real friends post college. Keep in mind all it takes is one great friend who is available. One great friend that is available is 10x more valuable than dozens of acquaintances.
One of things I fail to understand is why we don't see more guys who are in a LTR or married even with a kid in one country and single in other places / countries. That to me is the ultimate set up if you can swing it from my perspective. My daughter gives me more happiness than anything else in the world but I also enjoy being able to drink freely with the guys and not worry about getting home by a certain time.
Some professionals and business owners will be able to do this by attending "conferences" all over the place. (Even monthly) Or by having a business in two separate locations. Others who are location independent can have a kid in Thailand and go wild in Philippines for example. You get the love and affection that we need and you get to the excitement and joy of the freedom and chase.
One of the things as people will age is they will still probably like the same things they liked when they were younger...food, friends, fuck, events, drink, sex, travel. The problem is society in all kinds of ways pressure us to follow the American dream and even if you don't buy in the vast majority of friends you've had growing up if not all of them will buy in.