[Eddie Winslow]

The earlier and more sober I go out, the more I run into this problem.

I approach a girl or a group of girls just as the club is starting to fill up and she/they responds very well - clearly happy that I came up to her/them. Assuming the goal is to sleep with my target that night, should you escalate hard and go for a makeout and/or pull right away? Or do you plant the seed and walk away, planning to find her later near the time the club closes?

It seems socially awkward to make out with her in public before midnight. It also seems needy and not fun to hover around for an hour or more, bullshitting until it's near closing.

Right now, I typically chat them up for 5-10 mins, do only very light kino, then leave on a high note so I can go find my non-existent friends. It's not giving me the results I want.

Important note - I live in the suburbs which is a 10 min drive from the club. Getting a drink at the bar next door is rarely an option.

[Sonoma]

1. Get real friends, it'll make it less weird. If you have real friends, you can purposefully have them block you after the initial kiss, just so you can avoid hovering for an hour.

2. If you live 10 minutes away that's a relatively cheap Uber ride. Personally I find the idea of being sober driving a girl whose been drinking back to my spot for sex to be uncomfortable in the current environment. I know a lot of times as well, if you're sober it'll throw up red flags for her friends.

Also depends on what type of club. If it's a lot of heavy dancing then I'll just dance with them the remainder of the time, because that's enjoyable in and of itself. If it's a bullshit club where people don't really dance and everyone just drinks or gets bottle service, then I'd consider planting a seed, but I don't know how you manage to entertain yourself solo for that long. I get bored being in one spot with friends, can't imagine going stag

[PapayaTapper]

(10-22-2017 02:31 AM)Eddie Winslow Wrote:  

Important note - I live in the suburbs which is a 10 min drive from the club. Getting a drink at the bar next door is rarely an option.

The suburbs are rarely conducive to producing social "opportunities" for a single guy. (Unless you have a night job and are into "lonely MILF" game)

Is moving to improved logistics an option?

What about neighborhood bars instead of clubs? Those are easier to get on "lock" too

[Noir]

(10-22-2017 02:31 AM)Eddie Winslow Wrote:  

The earlier and more sober I go out, the more I run into this problem.

I approach a girl or a group of girls just as the club is starting to fill up and she/they responds very well - clearly happy that I came up to her/them. Assuming the goal is to sleep with my target that night, should you escalate hard and go for a makeout and/or pull right away? Or do you plant the seed and walk away, planning to find her later near the time the club closes?

It seems socially awkward to make out with her in public before midnight. It also seems needy and not fun to hover around for an hour or more, bullshitting until it's near closing.

Right now, I typically chat them up for 5-10 mins, do only very light kino, then leave on a high note so I can go find my non-existent friends. It's not giving me the results I want.

Important note - I live in the suburbs which is a 10 min drive from the club. Getting a drink at the bar next door is rarely an option.

Sonoma's suggestion of getting friends to go with you will make this infinitely easier.

You sound like you like a challenge though and I dig that.

The 'coming right' time is usually between 11.30 - 2AM. After that, it's messy but still on.

You just have to befriend the group but I am assuming you are running solo.

Running solo means your environment is your wingman. The music (vibe), the alcohol levels (inhibitions), logistics (ease of transition).

I used to go out only solo and my MO was as follows-

- befriend group and be friendly for like 15 minutes or more depending on actual vibe. Do you like these people? If not, find another group

- bounce said girl to smoking area; fine if her friends join. Create an inside joke with the group to hook later on. Best if relevant to surroundings so you can draw upon it later and it's not 'out of the blue' random shit. Fuck Marry Kill is a good old-school one which you can bring back later (oh look mr fuck is flirting with another girl/mr kill is still breathing, why haven't you taken care of him etc etc.)

- is the target interested or not? I am planting seeds throughout the discussion to see if she is interested or not. A lot of times, your target's friends may be more interested in you than her. This means your attention focus was mistaken but if they're hot, nothing really changes, just switch targets (if comfortable).

- excuse yourself for a short moment of time (go take a shit, make a phone call, chat up some other people/staff/guys or whatever) -> I always ensure I speak to guys too and make some friends.

- come back and gauge their response to your return. It's the litmus test of whether you wasted your time or not.

- keen? Let's go have a shot (with the girl herself), have a dance, have a smoke, anything to isolate and run some further game. Talk some deep shit and link it to sexual things without being directly sexual. Just get her mind thinking. Direct body language (invade personal space in a playful manner) and indirect verbals.

- logistics. If you haven't gotten the logistics in the initial opening stage, this is a reminder, get logistics. This is crucial because proximity is another wingman.

- go back to her friends and be personable. Continue the good vibes as they are the final gatekeepers to the lay.


To answer your OP:

- if they are happy you went to talk to them, then that's half the job done. It's yours to lose so don't overgame.

- it's socially awkward to make out in public pre-midnight. Private, it's fine.

- plant the seed but be around to water it. Don't be brief and leave. Don't be too long and game master 9000 eating her neck. Balance is key.

- make some guy friends when you enter. This way, you can excuse yourself to an actual group and talk some shit.

- these are all generalizations. If she is down and you are aware, pull her. Don't waste time. This is rare when solo; usually when you have a friend(s) to wing her friend(s) and you can both leave. Otherwise, it happens too quick and her friends worry and her anti-slut defence kicks in later.

- pick appropriate clubs where you can dance, dancing makes picking up girls much easier as it's more natural, less restrictive for pumping her emotions with touching and most of all, isolation-wise. Time also flies when dancing.

- have fun, if you feel like you have to stick around 3 hours to get laid then go have fun with another group. Really, 3 hours of your time is expensive + you are spending money to be there.

[Eddie Winslow]

Thanks for the replies guys.

To clarify, I do become friendly with groups of guys, other dudes rolling solo, mixed groups, etc. I just don't have the crew of known, trusted single friends I used to have 4-5 years ago. Life happens.

I can definitely do more to test her 1. logistics and 2. how willing she is to separate from her friends. The club I go to is awesome - it's big open dance floor venue filled with local and visiting HOT girls 21-25 and is the go to spot for the local college around the corner from my house. The negatives are that is not walking distance to campus, its a smaller college where everyone knows each other, and suburban girls in this age group roll 4-10 deep and very rarely leave a friend behind to get banged out by a random dude. It's definitely a challenge.

I'm a little confused on where these young suburban girls generate their sex lives from - the way they go out with orbiters, massive groups, etc. is not conducive at all to meeting a guy and/or getting laid. Can it really all be from Tinder?? Luckily NYC is only 45 mins away if I need it, but I would like to find a local girl if possible. There are just too many hotties in Jersey.

Any small-city/suburban players doing well offline?

[Noir]

Eddie, what about figuring out where they hang out outside of the clubs/bars?

These girls have a lot of free time so figure out where they spend it.

Gyms, markets, places where they run errands, anywhere else?

[Eddie Winslow]

(10-26-2017 12:11 PM)Noir Wrote:  

Eddie, what about figuring out where they hang out outside of the clubs/bars?

These girls have a lot of free time so figure out where they spend it.

Gyms, markets, places where they run errands, anywhere else?

I'm a weekend warrior. I'm super busy with work during the week, after the gym I rarely have time or energy to do much else. Aside from the nightlife I don't see the younger crowd out and about too often.

Can't believe that I never thought about becoming a member at the university fitness center, which is a long walk or a two minute drive from my condo. That would be a super easy way to meet hot local girls naturally.

Come to think of it...back when I was in school, my long distance, freshman year of college GF broke up with me to fuck some late 20s local guy she met at her school gym. At least I know this works!

[Noir]

That sounds perfect, kill two birds with one stone.

Even if you don't approach in the gym, they will recognize you in other places and their defences will vanish.

Tried and tested.

[rapaz12]

Wow, relevant thread. There have been many times I've hooked a set and let everything die out because I didn't want to hover around them forever.

Noir's breakdown is good framework for how to approach this.

[Sonoma]

There will be some on the forum that will disagree with this- but I'd recommend getting numbers as well. Since the town's small it's quite possible she's willing to do it but not in front of her friends.

I've definitely known girls to text an invite after going home separately, because they don't want to be known as a sloot at a small school

[Eddie Winslow]

I purchased RSDJulien's "Pimp" and it directly addresses this question in detail - as someone who has been studying game materials for nearly six years, I think this is really a great product.

To very broadly summarize, just accept the fact that even the most attractive dudes with the tightest game aren't going to be pulling a girl at 10pm in a regular venue on a regular Saturday night. Your only goal before midnight (maybe a bit later depending on how late your bars are open) is focus on yourself and yourself only. Use this time to take confidence-building action, get in the zone, and most importantly have FUN. Take all of the pressure off of yourself and don't even put sex on your radar.

Eventually, the crowd will get a solid buzz going and girls will get bored of standing in a circle with their friends. This is when you take all of that positive energy you've worked up all night and look to convert it into outcome based interactions/sex.

[Hazaer]

Predrink before you go out, this way you are not too sober. Hit the bars before the club if you head out early. So you can warm up and also there is a chance of venue changing with a group of girls to the club. But ultimately if you are running club game, going solo is always going to be tough in such a high energy environment, plus groups can be more cliquey. You need wings to bring up the energy you are bringing to the interaction and for isolation. They need not be the most game aware.