I respect Dinesh and as an Indian American, relate to his story.
I didn't have a choice coming to this country since I was 12. My parents came because they thought me and my sister had a future. They worked very hard and multiple jobs at a time to put food on the table while not at all fitting in with the culture, often times shunned because their behavior came off abnormal. At the same time, while they had every chance, they didn't take a cent from the government in food stamps or free stuff.
I still remember doing marginally well in school and being given those "minority" awards just to make me feel good. There was not one white American person; I don't think the awards were available to those kids in the first place. I was also placed in certain programs for "disadvantaged" youth where we had these mentors (mostly older white guys that were nice enough to give their time up). While I appreciated much of this, it used to make me feel like I was different. Supposedly, I was so disadvantaged that I needed a boost, but instead of boosting me down, I was repeatedly told that I have to fight against the disadvantage I have. At this point, of course I know it was a joke.
Sure I faced racism, but who the hell hasn't been told they aren't good enough, some times because of their height, other times due to their weight, and I could go on. It took me a while, but I got over it. If anything, my problem is that people treat me too well and I can't even have a politically incorrect honest conversation with them, because they think they'll offend me.
I love this country for bringing different people into ITS fabric (nationalism). I don't like when people think they get to create their own fabric (multiculturalism). I served in the Navy for 8 years. No matter what background you were, you started at the same spot and got promoted for performance. I worked for more black guys and women in a position of authority than any sense you would get of this in the mainstream media. I enjoyed learning about their cultures and backgrounds, whether they were some pale white dude form Minnesota, or some big Samoan dude from Hawaii. We were there for a common goal and we all cared for each others' characters, nothing else.
I feel it's okay to be open to different cultures and still be nationalistic. Just don't flaunt you culture against American culture and values; that's what frustrates me. I wish the civilian world would be more like my military experience. In most of my sensitive conversations, especially with white liberals, I'm constantly telling them "it's okay," after they've said "sorry, I don't mean to offend you" about a million times. It doesn't make for a great debate when people feel like they have some type of privilege over you. I had a conversation with a late 20's young white girl that works with me, where she constantly indicated how she had privilege over black people and muslims.
After the Navy, I went to college, had a high GPA and worked for one of the largest Accounting/consulting firms in the world. After 10 years in both there and finance positions, I now work in sales; specifically, the division of our company that brings on over 50% of its revenue. I would say I'm the 3rd highest performer in that group. It's a sales role. About 95% of the company is white. My sales numbers are consistently high when I work hard and they tank if I don't. Nothing else matters in this business, not my culture, not my skin color and not the way I dress (actually the pocket squares help
). It's the one reason I left my desk job to work here. I was in a tough spot a few months ago and my boss (a very red pill woman) and another partner really put their skin in the game to help me get back on track. Now I'm back on track and I owe them a huge deal of loyalty.
In a sense, because I was an immigrant and I had to assimilate, I probably worked harder than many others. However, did I have a disadvantage that was institutional or cultural? Maybe in the beginning, but I worked hard to assimilate and got over it. It's doable. In turn, I worked hard for what I have and I earned it fair and square. I love and respect this country for it. I wish more people would know that it can be done instead of thinking there is some rock tied to their foot.