Cruise Bangs
05-30-2015, 06:50 AM
**Post-script: I had no idea how much work it took to put a data sheet together. I based mine off one that was already in existence, and it is still a lot of effort. I just finished this for community review. I am willing to provide additional details, if necessary, to trusted members.
Preface: I have been thinking a while about how I may be able to help out with relevant, current data… anything… something… worth reading that could say thank you for all I have pulled from this forum over the last two years. I used some of the information from this OP on a cruise last August to get the bang, and thought my experience may help if anyone found themselves in a no-way-out, similar scenario as me… which was this bitch:
“Let’s make the best of a family cruise I don’t really want to go on.”
Abstract: I’m in my 30's. I fucked a college age “lesbian” for the week. A couple of other make outs, several blow outs/ failures. Went to Belize, saw some sharks, yada yada, fun week with my family. You can succeed in whatever you put your mind towards, fuck the odds.
Ok. The original post was made in 2011, so maybe an update on a more current landscape would be of value? I am going to break it down based on how I’d want to see it drawn out for someone with just a basic skill set. Without further delay, here goes:
I went on a family cruise, as a 30-something year old, reluctantly. I’m just a son of my retired mom and dad, and uncle. No wife. No kids. However, my parents really wanted to take the family on an adventure before they could no longer do so, and the result was I got a free ride because they were paying for pretty much the whole thing (except my bar tab). It would have been a huge disappointment if I just told them I didn’t want to go. So, I scanned the OP here, and decided to just play ball and see what happens. So let’s get down to the muthafuckin tacks.
Can I get a notch with bad logistics? YES
My logistics sucked. I found out just before the cruise I would have my nephew as a roommate. My family was in two other cabins, one next door, and the other in a veranda room across the hall a few doors down. Not good. Failure? No. Still successful. More details in the following explanation. However, at this point, I really did assume it was not going to be easy to pull girls back to my cabin, and I wasn’t counting on a bang in the girls room for various reasons. So I decided to just be hell bent on having fun with my family. This was crucial. I just did what I wanted to do all the time. I had a blast.
So, I’m on the ship, what’s next? PONCE DE LEON
First two days were at sea. Explore as much of the boat as possible. Own that shit. Just do your thing. All decks, get familiar with how it is mapped out. Talk to everyone over a drink in hand. I made sure I knew where to go for late night 24/7 ice cream and pizza. I felt like this was important for future reference. It actually helped. The girls know where this is, too. Was cruising by this art gallery area on the first day that my mom and I were going to an event the next morning. It was close to one of the bars and I found one of those family style bathrooms. Looked inside. Spotless. Decided this was an out of the way place for a late night rendezvous, if necessary. I had heard there were cameras everywhere. I decided this would be where my “let’s go for a walk” would take us. The art gallery and library area are on long corridors that close early. No fuss, no traffic. Perfect.
Can I bang a younger chick (21-25) in your 30’s running dolo? YES
Do I need to be a bad mother fucker with tight game to get a notch? NO
On the first or second night at sea after cruising all day, you need to secure your bitch of choice, even if not completely ideal (I had secured target on first night, with plans for daytime fun on day 2). You can always trade up, but do not wait until people start getting off the boat for excursions on the morning of day three. Your ship has sailed, even if you’re on it. Everyone has already made friends. Stick to how you do shit when everyone knows your name, i.e. just assume the sale. Try not to get too wasted and pass out early. You need to be at the pools and the clubs. Easier said than done. There are no strangers. Have fun with everyone, that’s why they are there. You might as well get out there and get low on some grandma if you’re sway, doesn't matter, they’ll be playing the same music for the next 6 days no matter what and everyone is looking down like it’s the fucking Colosseum so take your stage if you got something to offer. Even casual social proof will go a long way cause everyone starts out on the same level. Anyway. It took me about 2-3hours of bar/club hopping to find my target. I just went to where I thought was the best. My family had already bailed to the room. If it sucked, I left. If I was cool by myself, I stayed. Found this bar, with some ok talent. It was some cover band dudes singing Tom Petty and acoustic Pearl Jam. Saw my target there by herself. Details found out per visual or later: She was early twenties. Short. Busty. Long hair. Round face. Mixed race. Not a fitness freak (no six pack for sure, but a runner). Nice legs. Passed boner test with flying colors.
How did you game your younger bang?
It was the easiest fuck I have ever had, mainly because it was simply just about my fun in a new place, and I felt on top of the world and carefree. I wish I always felt like that. Approached at a small round table at one of the bars we were both in. There is only about 3-4 spots to be late night that aren't laughable. She was waiting for her family to show up. We talk for a few. Parents and crew show up. Talk amongst themselves after introduction to me, leaving me to their daughter. Ever so casually……… the little vixen sister throws out a comment about missing [girl’s name]. I said, ‘Who’s that?” Target says, “This annoying girl I’ve been trying to break up with for a while. I’m a lesbian.” Without a thought, I know she’s full of shit about being only into girls. My response, perfected smirk and all, was, “Lesbian? All right. Challenge accepted.” You should have seen her eyes. Within the hour, we are looking for a place to fuck, family is gone. Helps me answer the next obvious question.
Where can you fuck on the ship?
I was concerned about hot tubs, pools, and all kinds of areas where we were visible to the verandas and, more importantly, security cameras. I can tell you, while not the best fuck of my life, if you haven’t fucked on the front of a moving cruise ship in the shadows after ducking under the “do not pass” rope, you are missing out. Maybe it was that I had to lasso my pants around my leg to keep them from blowing off the front of the ship and walking back to my room butt naked, or the tornado of fresh air around my asshole as I plowed this new pussy into the hard deck… I cannot confirm. But it was magical. I am not responsible for you getting in trouble. Be like ninja.
Anyway, throughout the week, we fucked in the community bathroom near the art gallery a couple times, discretely fondled one another in the last row of one of the “speaking arrangements/comedy/performance farts/ bullshit” that we stayed at for 20 minutes.
Perfect Storm, Perfect Target
I know many will be skeptical that this was just right place at the right time. But I will tell you this. Do not shy away from the oldest sibling in her 20’s on the family vacation. Especially if there is a 12-15 year old sister. These ships allow the young cats to prowl late in these supposed safe zone camps and shit. I don’t think they are all that chaperoned, but not my problem. The kids run fucking wild til all hours if they don’t have a rat in the cabin. My nephew never sold me out for coming in at 5am and I never gave him up to my brother/ sister in law for the nights where I told him to “not come by before 2am unless he needs a doctor”. He stayed out until 2am most nights, my target’s sister didn’t come home until around 5am most nights. We just drank and fucked all night by ourselves, it was unbelievable.
What about the failures?
I was working things every day, really. I didn’t think my initial success would pan out all week like it did. I ran game on damn near every girl I thought was fuckable. There were a bunch that I think were available for someone, just wasn’t me. I made out with a couple drunk bitches, got blown out hardcore at one of the sing a long bars because, mid conversation, I decided it would be appropriate to start making fun of a loud fat bitch when I was completely wasted. You do dumb shit when you have a meet up in an hour and don't really give a fuck.
A bird in the hand is worth one with a better bush?
One of the things I stumbled on while at the excursion spots was something I think all of us would naturally do if in my situation. Imagine this… have a kick ass day with your family hiking ancient ruins in Mexico, swimming with sharks, etc. Then come back and spend 2 hours shopping for trinkets and bracelets and shit? Hell no. I’ll meet y’all at the fucking bar when it's time to get on the ship. This is your sad sack fish in a barrel gaming paradise. Goldilocks didn't have it this easy. Seek and destroy. They are playing beer pong, drinking weird shit out of the gigantic fruits, and incredibly friendly. These are your B-team. Readily available at all the excursion return playgrounds. They are waiting on the ferry/transport back to the ship. You have about an hour to close the deal. But you don’t need her phone number, won’t do you fuck all to have it. Just her cabin number to give a shout and tell her where to go. It’s what I think living in the 1950’s must have been like. It’s awesome. Even if she has your cabin number, it doesn’t mean shit. You just don’t answer if you’re asleep or fucking or busy, or away. They just leave a message with a loose expectation of reciprocity.
Done
A cruise, at full cost, is a low value atmosphere for an experienced or aspiring player. You can close, but do not embark or do it for the bang. Do it because you want to spend time with your family or friends, see a new part of the world, hell, anything but the notch count. But… always conquer, always reign…
Gus