[Cattle Rustler]

That's fucking horrible. They should place that mom in solitary for life and keep her kids under a microscope.

Will the 3 year old become like Dexter?

[HighSpeed_LowDrag]

I expect Democrats to be calling for swift bans on assault alligators shortly.

[stugatz]

(06-05-2015 05:02 PM)Comte De St. Germain Wrote:  

Tampa has hit number one on my bucketlist of places to visit before I die after I read this thread. Expect me down there soon.

I lived down there for a few months during high school. I hope you're a talented driver. All too often, it's either old people (slow) or Cubans (fast).

[Slam]

^Look at the comments on the gator fb post. lmao

[Merenguero]

(02-11-2017 06:15 PM)stugatz Wrote:  

(06-05-2015 05:02 PM)Comte De St. Germain Wrote:  

Tampa has hit number one on my bucketlist of places to visit before I die after I read this thread. Expect me down there soon.

I lived down there for a few months during high school. I hope you're a talented driver. All too often, it's either old people (slow) or Cubans (fast).

Did you say your forum name to them when they were bad drivers? I would, but I would use the non-anglicized version, questo cazzo.

[worldwidetraveler]

"Richard Henry Patterson, 65, of Margate, now wants permission from a judge to bolster his argument by showing his penis to a jury to support his claim that Francisca Marquinez, 60, choked to death in her bedroom while performing oral sex on him on Oct. 28, 2015, the Sun Sentinel reports."

http://nypost.com/2017/05/09/murder-susp...ight-work/

It looks like he is channeling the OJ glove debacle.

[buja]

Quote:

It looks like he is channeling the OJ glove debacle.

If the dick's obese...you must release!

[glugger]

If the dick is is large, you drop the charge!

[worldwidetraveler]

This one has it all.

IRT living in Florida has his parents fly from India to help him beat his wife for disobedience.



https://www.yahoo.com/news/florida-man-a...43979.html

[Repo]

Resurrecting this awesome thread. . .

Deputies: Florida man arrested for rigging door to electrocute pregnant wife

https://www.abcactionnews.com/news/state...gnant-wife

[Captain Gh]

And to keep this wonderful thread going... here's this Gem!

https://www.abcactionnews.com/news/state...-much-cash

Quote:

COCOA, Fla. (AP) — A Florida man told investigators he punched an automatic teller machine because it gave him too much cash.

An arrest report says 23-year-old Michael Joseph Oleksik man caused about $5,000 in damage to an ATM at a Wells Fargo bank branch in Cocoa on Nov. 29. He was arrested Dec. 22 on a criminal mischief charge after bank officials decided to press charges.

Florida Today reports surveillance video captured Oleksik pummeling the touch screen.

An arrest report says that Oleksik told a bank manager he was angry that the machine was giving him too much money and he didn’t know what to do because he was in a hurry for work. He apologized for causing damage.

Jail records don’t list a lawyer for Oleksik.

There must be something in the Water over there Geez!

[Captain Gh]

(02-11-2017 06:11 PM)HighSpeed_LowDrag Wrote:  

I expect Democrats to be calling for swift bans on assault alligators shortly.

Good weather... Home of Reality Kingz... And Crazy Ass people... I think I'm in love with Florida!

[RexImperator]

Quote:

AUGUST 2--In one of the more vile episodes to recently transpire inside a 7-Eleven, a Florida man yesterday dumped a bucket containing human feces and urine inside a convenience store in St. Petersburg, according to police.

Investigators allege that Damian Simms, 41, arrived at the 7-Eleven around 1:30 AM Wednesday and proceeded to toss the slurry of human waste on the floor of the business. The liquid splashed on merchandise valued at $28.

Pictured at right, Simms apparently obtained the waste from a portable toilet. “The defendant threw a bucket of port a potty liquid human feces and urine,” reported Officer Donald Ziglar.

http://thesmokinggun.com/documents/revol...est-710532

[ChefAllDay]

You guys are awesome! So hilarious!

Quote:

inside a 7-Eleven,

Is it wrong I want a cola slurpee and dry old chicken on a stick?

[Medvetz63]

Florida is America's anus.

[scotian]

(08-03-2018 08:12 PM)Medvetz63 Wrote:  

Florida is America's anus.

Don't be a gator hater bro!

Personally I think Florida is one of the greatest states, I fucking love that place and look forward to returning, I plan on going back down next winter for a visit.

Florida man makes beer run while clutching live alligator under his arm:

Quote:

Shoppers at a Jacksonville, Fla. convenience store got the fright of their lives after a man ventured inside while clutching a live alligator under his arm.

Video of the incident, which was posted to Facebook, shows the man entering the store, gator in hand, and saying, “Y’all got beer still? Y’all got beer still? Y’all aren’t out, are y’all?”


The man then spots a patron walking towards the walk-in beer cooler and rushes them, menacing them with the gator until they flee. People are heard laughing in the background, as the man helps himself to a pack of Busch Light from the cooler.

The reptile appeared to have its jaws taped shut.

https://globalnews.ca/news/4359664/jacks...-to-store/

How can you not love a place like this? I've been going down there for about 12 years, my parents have a place near Tampa in El Mechanico territory and I've had some great times down there. Yes the people are pretty fucked up, they're like caricatures; the white people are super red neck, methed up gator wrasslers (like the guy in the video) and the black people are super urban/ghetto, like iced grills and dread locks down to their arses and names tatted on their necks. Although they look and act crazy as fuck, they are some of the most friendliest people I've ever met in my life, Florida people are pretty laid back and like to party.

I remember when I first visited Florida and went out exploring, as my dad handed me the keys to big ass Cadillac, he told me "Scotian, if you ever get in a disagreement with someone here, just back down and walk away, these insane fuckers will shoot you!" And its true, one of the craziest stories that proved my old man's point was when some old dude shot and killed a young guy because he was texting in a movie theater, that happened just down the road from my folk's place: https://www.cnn.com/2014/01/13/justice/f...index.html

[Kish]

[Cr33pin]

(08-04-2018 10:06 AM)Kish Wrote:  

I dunno what the overall consensuses on here is about this case.....But I have no problem with the shooter not being charged.

The elderly man had a valid reason to at least confront the lady in the handicap space. He was talking to her not making threats or escalating violence as far as I can tell. He gets blindly thrown to the ground, as soon as he looks up the guy stops and pulls his pants up like he's getting ready for a brawl. The man fired one shot from the ground which he was thrown on... an thats that. I mean I'm not thrilled the guy died or anything.... but I just can't see charging this elderly man with anything based on that.

[Investment Bro]

I remember reading this thread back when I was a lurker and thinking that none of this shit could possibly be real.

Now that I live in Tampa, and after having a 300 pound woman with a handicap sticker threaten to shoot me at the UPS store for stopping at a stop sign? I know it's real.

God I love this state.

[The Stronger Sex]

Like Samuel Johnson would have said had he lived today, "That who is tired of Florida is tired of life".

[renotime]

(08-07-2018 11:36 AM)Cr33pin Wrote:  

(08-04-2018 10:06 AM)Kish Wrote:  

I dunno what the overall consensuses on here is about this case.....But I have no problem with the shooter not being charged.

The elderly man had a valid reason to at least confront the lady in the handicap space. He was talking to her not making threats or escalating violence as far as I can tell. He gets blindly thrown to the ground, as soon as he looks up the guy stops and pulls his pants up like he's getting ready for a brawl. The man fired one shot from the ground which he was thrown on... an thats that. I mean I'm not thrilled the guy died or anything.... but I just can't see charging this elderly man with anything based on that.

I don't think the shooter should have been charged, but he didn't use much discretion. After the guy shoved him there was reasonable distance so he was able to draw down on the scumbag. After that he could have told him to chill the fuck out and wait for the cops. But I'd say his use of deadly force was justified. He also showed solid control by only firing once and on target. 8/10 Would go to the range with.

But the thing with packing heat is you really can't go around looking to start arguments and fights. You basically have to avoid all conflict or you could end up killing someone, eg a parking lot dispute.

[CaptainChardonnay]

[Captain Gh]

Well Florida's in the news on another thread... for some Fucked Up Reason like Always... so here's the latest below

Link: https://www.newsweek.com/florida-man-oca...mb-1306680

Quote:

A Florida man caused an evacuation at a Taco Bell in Ocala this weekend after telling cops he drove there with a hand grenade he found while magnet fishing.

In social media updates yesterday, officials from the Ocala Police Department advised citizens to avoid the area after it was verified that the device was an “authentic WWII hand grenade.”

It appeared that the man, who was not identified by law enforcement, had waited until arriving at the popular fast food restaurant before reporting his discovery to the authorities.

The department said bomb squad experts had to be called onto the scene to remove the grenade, which they fortunately did so without incident. The Taco Bell closed for about an hour.

The police Twitter account wrote earlier: “Be advised that the Taco Bell on East Silver Springs Blvd. has been evacuated, following report of an explosive device located in a vehicle on premises."

It continued: “At 5:01 p.m. a caller informed dispatchers that he had found a hand grenade while magnet fishing in Ocklawaha, put it in his trunk, and drove to Taco Bell in Ocala. Marion County Sheriff's Bomb Squad has responded to ensure everyone’s safety. Please avoid the area.”

Under the Ocala Police Department’s Facebook post, commenters were quick to joke about the incident. Several questioned why he waited until getting to Taco Bell to inform the cops.

“But WHY? The last thing I’d do with a grenade is put it in my trunk and drive around,” one Facebook user noted. Another said: “Why does stuff like this only happened in Florida?”

It was not immediately clear exactly where the grenade was discovered by the man. On social media, the police uploaded multiple images of the device alongside other rusty objects. Fortunately in this case, no-one was injured by the hand grenade. Police said it was “disposed of properly.”

It is not the first time the unique pastime has resulted in shocking finds. Magnet Fishing is the process of searching bodies of water for lost or interesting objects using—unsurprisingly—strong magnets.

In August last year, in the U.K., a family discovered a stash of guns while hunting in a river. And in October 2018, YouTuber Gareth Bryer reeled in an antique pistol, axehead and knife, local news outlet Kent Online reported.

I guess he had to Eat First!!? As soon as I see Florida... I'm not even surprised anymore! Can't wait to visit this Place

[realologist]

(01-29-2019 10:44 PM)Captain Gh Wrote:  

Well Florida's in the news on another thread... for some Fucked Up Reason like Always... so here's the latest below

Link: https://www.newsweek.com/florida-man-oca...mb-1306680

Quote:

A Florida man caused an evacuation at a Taco Bell in Ocala this weekend after telling cops he drove there with a hand grenade he found while magnet fishing.

In social media updates yesterday, officials from the Ocala Police Department advised citizens to avoid the area after it was verified that the device was an “authentic WWII hand grenade.”

It appeared that the man, who was not identified by law enforcement, had waited until arriving at the popular fast food restaurant before reporting his discovery to the authorities.

The department said bomb squad experts had to be called onto the scene to remove the grenade, which they fortunately did so without incident. The Taco Bell closed for about an hour.

The police Twitter account wrote earlier: “Be advised that the Taco Bell on East Silver Springs Blvd. has been evacuated, following report of an explosive device located in a vehicle on premises."

It continued: “At 5:01 p.m. a caller informed dispatchers that he had found a hand grenade while magnet fishing in Ocklawaha, put it in his trunk, and drove to Taco Bell in Ocala. Marion County Sheriff's Bomb Squad has responded to ensure everyone’s safety. Please avoid the area.”

Under the Ocala Police Department’s Facebook post, commenters were quick to joke about the incident. Several questioned why he waited until getting to Taco Bell to inform the cops.

“But WHY? The last thing I’d do with a grenade is put it in my trunk and drive around,” one Facebook user noted. Another said: “Why does stuff like this only happened in Florida?”

It was not immediately clear exactly where the grenade was discovered by the man. On social media, the police uploaded multiple images of the device alongside other rusty objects. Fortunately in this case, no-one was injured by the hand grenade. Police said it was “disposed of properly.”

It is not the first time the unique pastime has resulted in shocking finds. Magnet Fishing is the process of searching bodies of water for lost or interesting objects using—unsurprisingly—strong magnets.

In August last year, in the U.K., a family discovered a stash of guns while hunting in a river. And in October 2018, YouTuber Gareth Bryer reeled in an antique pistol, axehead and knife, local news outlet Kent Online reported.

I guess he had to Eat First!!? As soon as I see Florida... I'm not even surprised anymore! Can't wait to visit this Place

So Taco Bell gave him explosive diarrhea so bad the Taco Bell had to be shut down. Sounds like a normal Taco Bell.

[mickeyd]

https://www.nbcnews.com/news/us-news/flo...se-n992366

"Florida good Samaritan shot dead after picking up tabs at Waffle House
The generous man was picking up people's tabs and handing out $20 bills before he got shot in the head."

Now this is some classic florida shit right here. Man decides to be some hero figure to the scumbag denizens of a waffle house at 3 am. Some ghetto bitch gets angry that her meal wasnt paid for and then her ghetto boyfriend shoots the guy. Way to go Waffle house hero!