I think we're seeing a distinction by those of us who've gotten played with this tactic, and those that have not.
I've never had a girl not go out with me again whether or not we ordered apps, or, god forbid, I decided to take her out for sushi after drinks! Not in NYC, not anywhere, not in 2 decades. Yes, I said I decided, because it is ALWAYS our decision. She can suggest whatever she likes. She can ask to be driven home in a silver Ghost Rolls-Royce by Brad Pitt, doesn't affect me any.
If you maintain frame, and she's thinking about sleeping with you - get this - a $8 appetizer will not change that in her mind. I'd order something I wanted and eat half of it. Perhaps you didn't want to, and you let her talk you into it, and NOW she thinks you've lost frame and are a pushover - that's my guess. I sure hope no one whined about it.
For those of you worried about costs, do you limit her to 2 drinks? 4? Where's the line....can she order a martini or only Coors Light? If she's drunk can she keep ordering?
If she's sober does she get to have more drinks throughout the night?
I'm curious what your distinction is, Cost-wise.... Is it simply $8 Cosmo good, any food bad?
I've never had a girl not go out with me again whether or not we ordered apps, or, god forbid, I decided to take her out for sushi after drinks! Not in NYC, not anywhere, not in 2 decades. Yes, I said I decided, because it is ALWAYS our decision. She can suggest whatever she likes. She can ask to be driven home in a silver Ghost Rolls-Royce by Brad Pitt, doesn't affect me any.
If you maintain frame, and she's thinking about sleeping with you - get this - a $8 appetizer will not change that in her mind. I'd order something I wanted and eat half of it. Perhaps you didn't want to, and you let her talk you into it, and NOW she thinks you've lost frame and are a pushover - that's my guess. I sure hope no one whined about it.
For those of you worried about costs, do you limit her to 2 drinks? 4? Where's the line....can she order a martini or only Coors Light? If she's drunk can she keep ordering?
If she's sober does she get to have more drinks throughout the night?
I'm curious what your distinction is, Cost-wise.... Is it simply $8 Cosmo good, any food bad?