Dating Guide for Mainland China - Printable Version
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Dating Guide for Mainland China - TravelerKai - 04-06-2016
Quote: (04-06-2016 06:04 AM)Vacancier Permanent Wrote:
Is QQ still used nowadays? From what I've heard here in HGZ, QQ is obsolete. No one bothers with it anymore. It's all done through Wechat.
QQ is still linked with your Qzone. If your Qzone is well developed you will keep both especially if your whole family uses it. Wechat version of Qzone is like Instagram, where as Qzone is like weibo, which is more like Facebook.
Younger people are definitely more Wechat prone these days.
Dating Guide for Mainland China - ovloV - 04-06-2016
Yea, for most communication, wechat has overtaken QQ. It doesn't mean that nobody uses QQ anymore, and QQ still has a ton of advantages, like searching and joining groups. You could join a group about jobs in Hangzhou, and it would just be people posting job openings. Wechat doesn't have the same function. You'd be hard pressed to find a Chinese that only uses one or the other though. Both are serviceable.
Dating Guide for Mainland China - Space Cowboy - 04-07-2016
Quote: (04-04-2016 09:34 PM)Vacancier Permanent Wrote:If you can't handle staring, what the fuck are you doing in Asia anyway...
I think it would be a mistake to get too serious with the staring, it's not meant with any harm in the vast majority of cases.
Quote:Quote:
However the staring is even more emphasised when you're either well dressed and or with a girl. Doesn't have to be a chinese girl. Any girl and you'd be stared down at hard core!
True. When I walk through campus (which is populated mostly by skinny nerds) in my nicer "going out" clothes I catch a lot of stares.
I've got a date with a Chinese girl on Friday. Suits, I'm going to take her down to that area near Tuanjiehu, hopefully that'll work well.
On a different note, I think it'll be a bit difficult to find Chinese male friends here. Especially on campus, they are so fucking bizarre and socially awkward compared to their female counterparts. It's amplified when they go out on the weekends too-- anybody who has seen one of these guys try dance in a club knows what I'm talking about. I don't blame them, society does not train them at all for casual social encounters. These poor fucks are studying every day for the 高考 and then when they finally get into the university, they're not even allowed into girls dormitories at any time of the day.
Dating Guide for Mainland China - Suits - 04-07-2016
Quote:Quote:
On a different note, I think it'll be a bit difficult to find Chinese male friends here. Especially on campus, they are so fucking bizarre and socially awkward compared to their female counterparts. It's amplified when they go out on the weekends too-- anybody who has seen one of these guys try dance in a club knows what I'm talking about. I don't blame them, society does not train them at all for casual social encounters. These poor fucks are studying every day for the 高考 and then when they finally get into the university, they're not even allowed into girls dormitories at any time of the day.
Don't even both trying to make male Chinese friends. Once in a while, you'll meet an exception, but they are all pretty much like that.
Don't blame the Gaokao, it's the intentional efforts of their parents to prevent them from socializing freely that does that to them.
Dating Guide for Mainland China - Fortis - 04-07-2016
Gonna disagree slightly with that, Suits. A lot of the dudes are fucking weird and jealous, but many of them are down to earth and friendly. If you can make friends in the context of activities (pool/snooker, rock music, basketball) they tend to be a lot cooler, but I do agree that many of the young men in china are very uncomfortable in social situations.
The ones who have gotten abroad for even a bit of time are far more keen on being actual friends instead of just trying to profit off of know you because you're a foreigner and you make them appear cooler.
Sadly, many of the most extroverted Chinese people I meet don't speak much English, while many of the bi-lingual chinese are not keen on speaking with me beyond work or making money off of me.
But yeah, I woudn't stress too much about befriending Chinese bros until I'm set up and can better screen for qualities that would make them good friends in the first place.
I usually screen for Western education and (obviously) strong English skills. These ones tend to be a lot less likely to act like farmers and buffoons and not to judge you for wanting to smash the same chicks they'd smash if they had the chance.
Dating Guide for Mainland China - donnie514 - 04-08-2016
I made the mistake to go out with a Korean manager in another department and a chinese guy I work with the other day.
These guys were terrible. I could hardly believe it. Then to top it off the Chinese guy told everyone a my work that I have girlfriend now because I went back with a girl who he ended up meeting. Never again.
Also a question for you guys who have been here long. Do I call bullshit on the girls who don't drink? I know in Phils that was just a ploy to pretend they are good girls....I find it hard to believe that a girl 21-27 doesn't drink ANY alcohol not even on occasion.
These coffee shop dates give me too much of the runs..
Dating Guide for Mainland China - Suits - 04-08-2016
Quote: (04-08-2016 01:46 AM)donnie514 Wrote:
Also a question for you guys who have been here long. Do I call bullshit on the girls who don't drink? I know in Phils that was just a ploy to pretend they are good girls....I find it hard to believe that a girl 21-27 doesn't drink ANY alcohol not even on occasion.
Yes, that is common enough in China.
Take them to a cocktail lounge and order them a mocktail.
Dating Guide for Mainland China - ovloV - 04-08-2016
Quote: (04-08-2016 01:46 AM)donnie514 Wrote:
I made the mistake to go out with a Korean manager in another department and a chinese guy I work with the other day.
These guys were terrible. I could hardly believe it. Then to top it off the Chinese guy told everyone a my work that I have girlfriend now because I went back with a girl who he ended up meeting. Never again.
Also a question for you guys who have been here long. Do I call bullshit on the girls who don't drink? I know in Phils that was just a ploy to pretend they are good girls....I find it hard to believe that a girl 21-27 doesn't drink ANY alcohol not even on occasion.
These coffee shop dates give me too much of the runs..
It's completely credible for a girl to not drink alcohol into her 30s, it may even be likely depending on her social status (HiSos and FEDs can drink heavily, because why the hell not, but if she's middle class and a college student, probably not a drinker at all. If she's a migrant, they can be big party animals.)
Dating Guide for Mainland China - Arado - 04-08-2016
Quote: (04-07-2016 04:36 AM)Suits Wrote:
Quote:Quote:
On a different note, I think it'll be a bit difficult to find Chinese male friends here. Especially on campus, they are so fucking bizarre and socially awkward compared to their female counterparts. It's amplified when they go out on the weekends too-- anybody who has seen one of these guys try dance in a club knows what I'm talking about. I don't blame them, society does not train them at all for casual social encounters. These poor fucks are studying every day for the 高考 and then when they finally get into the university, they're not even allowed into girls dormitories at any time of the day.
Don't even both trying to make male Chinese friends. Once in a while, you'll meet an exception, but they are all pretty much like that.
Don't blame the Gaokao, it's the intentional efforts of their parents to prevent them from socializing freely that does that to them.
Even with good language skills, I've found it hard to make local male friends. The ones that speak English fluently and have lived abroad are a bit easier to get along with, but there is still always something a little off about them. Sometimes it's poor social skills, an underlying aggressiveness, or an inferiority complex. Seems like they are rarely genuine and always trying to get something out of me. With expats I can just relax and be myself. Interesting how it's so much easier to get along with girls (even ones I'm not trying to date) - girls have better emotional intelligence, maybe less pressure for school (?), and don't have to be as witty/charming in a conversation.
Dating Guide for Mainland China - Arado - 04-08-2016
Quote: (04-05-2016 10:05 AM)TravelerKai Wrote:
Quote: (04-05-2016 07:20 AM)Arado Wrote:
Have been stagnating in my daygame street openers, so far I've been asking for directions and dropping little bait, doesn't hook very often. Seems locals are really not used to talking to strangers. So far almost all leads coming from events and social circle. Anyone have some good daygame tactics that you can use when going about daily business?
Did you QQ number close when asking for directions? ABC. Always be closing. ABQQC. Always be QQ closing. Any bait you opened with, requires a closer to finish. Fundamental game technique always applies no matter the location or women. Focus on the close just as much as you focus on the opener. You don't want a race car that does 0-60MPH in 3 secs only to finish the 1/4 mile at 14 seconds.
Anytime I open a chick in daygame I'm always thinking about the close. However, the problem is that they're usually painfully shy and it's hard to transition to a normal conversation once I deliver the opener. In the West people are so much more conversational, but not in China. What strategies and openers during day game have you used that are most effective here? No language barrier for me, but sometimes it takes the locals a moment to realize that I'm speaking the local language and not English.
Yesterday girl walking down the street smiled at me, I didn't realize it until she passed me so I blurted out a nihao and asked her name, but she replied only briefly but was still smiling and kept walking in the opposite direction. Should have pursued - that level of openness rarely happens.
Dating Guide for Mainland China - TravelerKai - 04-09-2016
Quote: (04-08-2016 07:43 PM)Arado Wrote:
[quote] (04-05-2016 10:05 AM)TravelerKai Wrote:
(04-05-2016, 12:20 PM)Arado Wrote: Have been stagnating in my daygame street openers, so far I've been asking for directions and dropping little bait, doesn't hook very often. Seems locals are really not used to talking to strangers. So far almost all leads coming from events and social circle. Anyone have some good daygame tactics that you can use when going about daily business?
Did you QQ number close when asking for directions? ABC. Always be closing. ABQQC. Always be QQ closing. Any bait you opened with, requires a closer to finish. Fundamental game technique always applies no matter the location or women. Focus on the close just as much as you focus on the opener. You don't want a race car that does 0-60MPH in 3 secs only to finish the 1/4 mile at 14 seconds.
Quote:Quote:
Anytime I open a chick in daygame I'm always thinking about the close. However, the problem is that they're usually painfully shy and it's hard to transition to a normal conversation once I deliver the opener. In the West people are so much more conversational, but not in China. What strategies and openers during day game have you used that are most effective here? No language barrier for me, but sometimes it takes the locals a moment to realize that I'm speaking the local language and not English.
Yesterday girl walking down the street smiled at me, I didn't realize it until she passed me so I blurted out a nihao and asked her name, but she replied only briefly but was still smiling and kept walking in the opposite direction. Should have pursued - that level of openness rarely happens.
You have asked this question before and I gave you some advice (reposting for your convenience). She smiled and walked off because you probably sounded like a newbie and she is shy. You gotta start talking like the guys you won't bond with. Sound, look, and feel natural.
Quote: (07-22-2015 08:20 AM)TravelerKai Wrote:
[quote] (07-22-2015 03:02 AM)JamesRodri Wrote:
(07-22-2015, 03:19 AM)Mr.GoodThread Wrote:
Quote: (07-22-2015 06:50 AM)Arado Wrote:
If you speak the language do you open with it or start in English and switch later? I've had mixed results starting in English vs local language, anyone have suggestions on how to figure out which one to start with? I'm in China.
In China, women love laowai that try to speak Mandarin. They smile big or giggle at you. Even if they go "Huh?" or "Shenme?!", they like that you are still trying. Only the ones with strong English, will ask that you just speak in English. I usually reply back in English or Chinese that they are haters because my Chinese is better than theirs, just to tease them and make them relax. They will call you silly, but they will get moist. Trust me.
Always open in Mandarin. Switch from "Ni hao, to "Hao a". Use Zaoshang hao (good morning) before 12. Use Wanshang hao in the evening. Ni hao is just too corny with younger girls these days and comes off awkward. If you know how to pronounce it correctly, use Zao An or Wan An instead of zaoshang and wanshang.
After you do the greeting, let them know you do not speak alot of Chinese but you are studying. Wo yi dian shuo zhongyin or something like that. Suits correct my grammar, it's early here. Then say something like wo xue xi zhongyin (I am studying Chinese), then continue after that in Chinese or English.
What this shows them is that you are eager to learn their culture and language. Chinese people as a whole like that alot. Sometimes, and I mean sometimes, certain girls that think lowly of their ownselves will slot you as very high quality and we not want to talk with you (they are embarrassed), if you can speak more than ni hao. You would have to know how to talk very fast in Chinese to prevent them from escaping, and use slang. Often times these are very poor girls. Don't worry about that though. Just make sure you take note and approach prettier ones that look more put together. Those are the ones that can be intrigued by foreigners and patient enough to hear you out.
Lastly, never be afraid to repeat yourself or ashamed. Even if it feels like they are annoyed. Lots of guys hate that, but keep saying it (with a big smile) until they get it. They might try to correct your Mandarin. In their own localism even, which is not standard Mandarin!! Just say hao hao (Okay okay) then try repeating it the way they like. They do not realize it yet, but they are getting reeled in like a fish.
(in a Jeremy Wade voice) Game On!
Yet another reason you guys need to change your attitudes about the young men in China. I have many male acquaintances. You really need to befriend some alpha dog types too. The way they carry themselves is how my game ultimately mimicked and I started killing it in China. That is the end game for China. If you can carry yourself and speak like those men there, China game is effectively over for you. You would need no new lessons, techniques, etc. You would have male business partners and best friends, a wife, an ernai, and side girlfriends if executed correctly.
Like Fortis posted before, start with basketball. No bite there? See what other sports they like. No sports at all? Check for gambling, mahjong, cars, music, business, science, politics, various education stuff, pleasure houses, etc.
Many of you are going to have to understand that game itself is how you are able to socialize with all people. Not just horny young women. If you really pay attention to the top repped members and guys that have elite game on this forum (WIA, Parlay44, Roosh, Tuthmosis, AB, Beyond Borders, Jariel, Lizard, Scorpion, Cobra, Excelsior, GlobalEntry, Sp5, 20Nation, etc.) you will noticed that these guys could talk to ANYONE on the street (male or female) and achieve effective communication with that person outside of language barrier issues.
The next level of game for you guys needs to be effective communication. Some of you may say, well Kai probably half of those dudes you mentioned above are lawyers. Well, half are not lawyers. No excuses. Learning how to effectively communicate to any audience is a life long journey. It can always improve. Look for lessons that can be learned. Reflect on all past encounters. Read books and resources online outside of the Manosphere on communication and leadership.
Dating Guide for Mainland China - TravelerKai - 04-09-2016
Quote: (04-08-2016 01:46 AM)donnie514 Wrote:
I made the mistake to go out with a Korean manager in another department and a chinese guy I work with the other day.
These guys were terrible. I could hardly believe it. Then to top it off the Chinese guy told everyone a my work that I have girlfriend now because I went back with a girl who he ended up meeting. Never again.
Also a question for you guys who have been here long. Do I call bullshit on the girls who don't drink? I know in Phils that was just a ploy to pretend they are good girls....I find it hard to believe that a girl 21-27 doesn't drink ANY alcohol not even on occasion.
These coffee shop dates give me too much of the runs..
So what? I fail to see the problem there. You do understand that have a girlfriend is a good thing and not a bad thing right? Now you have been vouched as a man of value to all other women in your workplace. They have all given you a +1 mentally. If they ever get to see her and she is prettier than they are it's a +2. Doesn't mean they will automatically give chase, but it's the score that counts. You should not be pulling from your workplace in the first place anyway. I would not give a shit what the boss says. Never shit where you eat. Chinese can do that and get away with it, don't try that as a foreigner. It never works out well.
You need two personas there. The work one with the boss and the co-worker dawgs, when out on the town at night doing what men do. The office one, that is straight laced, good at your job, and does not cause others to lose face and do not start drama. Your third persona is the one outside work, where you can be the dude with a stable of love interests that have no shot at knowing about each other via workplace acquaintances. If they know about each other, it is because you told them so.
All my girlfriends knew about each other by first name at least. My wife knew I had 5 girlfriends at least. I told her 5, but it was probably closer to 7 or 9, I forget. I figured this out on my own by telling girls I did not give a shit about in an attempt to get rid of them. When I figured out it made them want me more, I experimented with it more and found that pre-validation game is king in China and Asia.
Take out your Western mindset of dating and how the world works while in China. Neither apply to one another.
Dating Guide for Mainland China - Fortis - 04-10-2016
Quote: (04-08-2016 01:46 AM)donnie514 Wrote:
I made the mistake to go out with a Korean manager in another department and a chinese guy I work with the other day.
These guys were terrible. I could hardly believe it. Then to top it off the Chinese guy told everyone a my work that I have girlfriend now because I went back with a girl who he ended up meeting. Never again.
Also a question for you guys who have been here long. Do I call bullshit on the girls who don't drink? I know in Phils that was just a ploy to pretend they are good girls....I find it hard to believe that a girl 21-27 doesn't drink ANY alcohol not even on occasion.
These coffee shop dates give me too much of the runs..
No, some girls here legitimately don't have hobbies or social lives, dude. It blows our minds but it is true. I've met a number of girls here who legitimately think that only rapacious guys and sluts go to bars. It's hilarious that they really believe that, but some (not all) chicks really believe that.
I know girls who have the following hobbies: going home, staying home, picking flowers, knitting, playing on wechat and talking on the phone. I genuinely believe that they only do these things because their personalities reflect that dearth of social experience.
I had a coworker here who was a legitimate 8 in my book. Long legs, beautiful, perfect skin and toned body, but she was so so so so so fucking boring. Like, the sort of girl you might lock down because you know she doesn't have the skills to even have an affair.
This chick had solid english and I once asked her:
"What do you do for fun?"
Her reply:
"fun? Stay home and play on wechat."
It wasn't even sarcasm. She was just that boring.
This is common, too.
You also have to factor in that their families sort of encourage it with the hyper competitive education system here and all the piano lessons, guitar lessons, dance lessons and all that other shit.
Nearly every middle class chinese boy I have met can play an instrument at a super high level. Like, they're busting out Paganini caprices on shitty $90 dollar guitars that have strings like razorwire, but they don't feel it because their hands are so thicky calloused from years of practice. That would have any dude back home getting more pussy than he could handle, but these dudes have no social skills.
This isn't a mark against the guys, it's just how the culture is set up for many people.
Bar culture is a new thing in China. They general assumption in guangdong from the people I've talked to is that the bar is for "open" people. By open they mean slutty, old, or foreign. Ha.
When chinese people go to the KTV it is almost always with college class mates, workmates, business relations or family members. They tend to have closed exclusive social circles.
Dating Guide for Mainland China - swuglyfe - 04-10-2016
Question here coming from an ABC, what's the read on gaming Russians in China?
I'm learning Russian right now for the purpose of gaming Mother Russia and FSU head on, but I figure if I'll be in China anyways quite a few times it can only help for my pool to be expanded further.
In my past experience with them (read: bluepill days), I take it they feel isolated and are mostly dancers, models (for Chinese fashion companies that only want white people to model and for cheap too), or mail order brides because the ratio's so fucked up.
Dating Guide for Mainland China - ovloV - 04-10-2016
Quote: (04-10-2016 09:02 PM)swuglyfe Wrote:
Question here coming from an ABC, what's the read on gaming Russians in China?
I'm learning Russian right now for the purpose of gaming Mother Russia and FSU head on, but I figure if I'll be in China anyways quite a few times it can only help for my pool to be expanded further.
In my past experience with them (read: bluepill days), I take it they feel isolated and are mostly dancers, models (for Chinese fashion companies that only want white people to model and for cheap too), or mail order brides because the ratio's so fucked up.
Social Circle game. They run in weird cliques, mainly a mish-mash of foreigners in the entertainment scene- club owners, promoters, managers, and DJs. That's the crowd you need to get in with to get those girls. That's the hard part. I luckily stumbled into all of my connections in China, and it paid off dividends. Find where they hang out during the day and try to get in good with them.
Dating Guide for Mainland China - Fortis - 04-10-2016
Quote: (04-10-2016 09:02 PM)swuglyfe Wrote:
Question here coming from an ABC, what's the read on gaming Russians in China?
I'm learning Russian right now for the purpose of gaming Mother Russia and FSU head on, but I figure if I'll be in China anyways quite a few times it can only help for my pool to be expanded further.
In my past experience with them (read: bluepill days), I take it they feel isolated and are mostly dancers, models (for Chinese fashion companies that only want white people to model and for cheap too), or mail order brides because the ratio's so fucked up.
Hmm, I've had mixed experiences with Russians. The dudes are overwhelming cool and friendly, but the girls? not so much.
Example: I once walk up to one of the clubs in SZ because I'm bored as fuck. I don't wanna pay cover so i start chatting with a promoter. We talk for a good 10 minutes and he just lets me in and introduces me to some of the other promoters, comped me some free drinks and made me feel very welcome.
One night I got trashed there and he made sure I got home safe and everything. Great guy, %100. I still talk to him now and then and occasionally come to that club because of that.
I've also had Russian dudes help me out in situations where I need to communicate complex ideas to Chinese people, but can't because of my shit Chinese skills.
Overall, I find them to be really cool.
The girls I've met vary. They're usually open to talking and will help me find this or that place if I ask, but when you try and grab a number they seem to freeze up a bit and shut me out.
I've had this happen in the clubs, on the train and while walking. I imagine the foreign thirst and their natural chilly nature can make them difficult to pick up.
BUT I do know a Chinese guy in Beijing who specifically targets russian girls and he seems to do quite well.
He's tall, in good shape, western educated and is cool. I imagine being Asian won't count against you. You probably get bonus points for speaking Russian.
Dating Guide for Mainland China - Arado - 04-11-2016
Quote: (04-10-2016 09:02 PM)swuglyfe Wrote:
Question here coming from an ABC, what's the read on gaming Russians in China?
I'm learning Russian right now for the purpose of gaming Mother Russia and FSU head on, but I figure if I'll be in China anyways quite a few times it can only help for my pool to be expanded further.
In my past experience with them (read: bluepill days), I take it they feel isolated and are mostly dancers, models (for Chinese fashion companies that only want white people to model and for cheap too), or mail order brides because the ratio's so fucked up.
I've had a decent reception from them in China when meeting them in a non-club environment in which they can hear me speak decent Russian. In loud clubs and bars where they are constantly oogled by Arab and Turkish guys it's near impossible (though dressing nice offsets that a bit). Social circle helps as well, though they are still quite cold. Chinese people are so much nicer when they hear you speak Chinese but Russian women don't give much credit. Don't bother speaking Russian with the Western Ukranians btw.
The key is making friends that will introduce you to them or finding them in a non club environment. I still have no idea where they hang out during the day though or what events they go to.
Dating Guide for Mainland China - Jack Of All Trades - 04-13-2016
So I went out with out with this FOB chinese girl, wow what the fuck? She's the sweetest girl I've ever met, like I'm shocked at this hard. But it's difficult to escalate with this girl, she's also insanely shy it's ridiculous. The thing about the girls having boring lives hits the nail on the head so well I'm just shocked. She's new the to city and when I try english with her it's instantly reverts to mandarin again when we speak and I can't flirt well in mandarin. She gets embarrassed easily and is actually quite boring, even she admits it. I take her out to grab a coffee and ask her what she wants, she said she doesn't want anything then points at something after and speaks to me in chinese. I asked her if she wants to come dancing with me on some nights and she turns red and refuses saying she can't dance. Man this girl is bleeding insecurity so much it's unbelievable.
I don't even know, man these foreigners have such an easier time than us ABCs, the girls they meet seem to be always DTF
Dating Guide for Mainland China - Space Cowboy - 04-14-2016
Ask her to come watch a movie or something at your place and supply the wine.
Dating Guide for Mainland China - yep - 04-14-2016
I agree, I didn`t quite get at first, but I would say many/most Chinese girls fear public displays of affection, holding hands might be ok outside, but I find it much better to do the hugging kissing and so on in private.
Dating Guide for Mainland China - Space Cowboy - 04-14-2016
Quote: (04-14-2016 08:54 PM)yep Wrote:
I agree, I didn`t quite get at first, but I would say many/most Chinese girls fear public displays of affection, holding hands might be ok outside, but I find it much better to do the hugging kissing and so on in private.
PDAs are considered "naughty" and anti-social by even the westernized Chinese. Dark alleyways are about as public as a lot of girls would feel comfortable, so in the car or at you/her place is the best.
Dating Guide for Mainland China - RichieP - 04-15-2016
TravellerKai, could you expand more upon what you mean by "Pre-validation game in China and Asia"?
I think I get it - basically social proof - when girl A perceives you as desired/approved of by other girls, it increases her attraction/investment.
This seems to be a general dynamic with women, but sounds like you're saying it's particularly effective and important in Asia.
Could you expand on that?
Would love to hear more, especially a specific example or two of how to get the pre-validation ball rolling, and how to capitalize on it.
I also wonder how this meshes with being perceived as a player. My current understanding is that falling into "sleazy western player" frame can damage your results in Asia... girls are more concerned with "being cheap", being pumped and dumped by the foreigner, etc - but sounds like you are framing player status advantageously. Any thoughts there?
Thanks!
Dating Guide for Mainland China - CodyB - 04-15-2016
Quote: (04-08-2016 02:14 AM)Suits Wrote:
Quote: (04-08-2016 01:46 AM)donnie514 Wrote:
Also a question for you guys who have been here long. Do I call bullshit on the girls who don't drink? I know in Phils that was just a ploy to pretend they are good girls....I find it hard to believe that a girl 21-27 doesn't drink ANY alcohol not even on occasion.
Yes, that is common enough in China.
Take them to a cocktail lounge and order them a mocktail.
Better yet, order them a long island and tell them it's a mocktail.
Dating Guide for Mainland China - Lostdreams - 04-17-2016
Quote: (04-10-2016 10:10 PM)Fortis Wrote:
Quote: (04-10-2016 09:02 PM)swuglyfe Wrote:
Question here coming from an ABC, what's the read on gaming Russians in China?
I'm learning Russian right now for the purpose of gaming Mother Russia and FSU head on, but I figure if I'll be in China anyways quite a few times it can only help for my pool to be expanded further.
In my past experience with them (read: bluepill days), I take it they feel isolated and are mostly dancers, models (for Chinese fashion companies that only want white people to model and for cheap too), or mail order brides because the ratio's so fucked up.
Hmm, I've had mixed experiences with Russians. The dudes are overwhelming cool and friendly, but the girls? not so much.
Example: I once walk up to one of the clubs in SZ because I'm bored as fuck. I don't wanna pay cover so i start chatting with a promoter. We talk for a good 10 minutes and he just lets me in and introduces me to some of the other promoters, comped me some free drinks and made me feel very welcome.
One night I got trashed there and he made sure I got home safe and everything. Great guy, %100. I still talk to him now and then and occasionally come to that club because of that.
I've also had Russian dudes help me out in situations where I need to communicate complex ideas to Chinese people, but can't because of my shit Chinese skills.
Overall, I find them to be really cool.
The girls I've met vary. They're usually open to talking and will help me find this or that place if I ask, but when you try and grab a number they seem to freeze up a bit and shut me out.
I've had this happen in the clubs, on the train and while walking. I imagine the foreign thirst and their natural chilly nature can make them difficult to pick up.
BUT I do know a Chinese guy in Beijing who specifically targets russian girls and he seems to do quite well.
He's tall, in good shape, western educated and is cool. I imagine being Asian won't count against you. You probably get bonus points for speaking Russian.
Thanks for the kind words Fortis, though I don't only target Russian girls, I generally like European girls, much more so than American girls.
Swuglyfe, as a Chinese-face in China, our best bet (in addition to hitting the gym properly, dressing well, and generally having your shit together) is proper segmentation, aka locking down a niche. All girls visiting China have at least some interest in Chinese culture and language, especially if they are students, otherwise they wouldn't be here. (Spaniards/Greeks here because of their tanking economy notwithstanding) Your job is to be that bridge, a Chinese guy that can can show and explore with her all the parts of Chinese culture she wants to see, but also also able to connect and communicate with. You are like a rare pokemon (not my words, the friend of an Ex used that term to describe me), you are highly novel to them, and you need to seize that opportunity.
Some girls will simply dismiss you because of your race, or have zero real interest in China and Chinese culture. You know, the ones complaining how China is so terrible because it's different from where they used to live, while living in uber-Westernized Shanghai/Beijing. Ignore them, you weren't going to have a shot with them anyways. These same people will always see you as being "from here", regardless of your own cultural upbringing, so feel free to tell them to get their ass out of China and go home if they don't like it here/don't like Chinese guys.
In terms of venue, your best bet overall is day-game, where you can properly DHV, hold a conversation, and set yourself apart. At night-time in a club, you lose your novelty factor at best, at worst you get mistaken for the multitude of thirsty Chinese guys that exhibited terrible game. That is the overall strategy for an ABC in connecting with European girls in China. Bonus points if you speak a European language beyond English at a conversational level, which is a further DHV and way to build rapport.
For Russians/FSU, it's a bit different. They are European, but culturally distinct from their Western counterparts. Further, their English isn't always great. I've found, in the Russian girls I've been dated, they often spoke better Chinese than English, or preferred to speak Chinese and English equally.
How is your Chinese? If you already speak Chinese at a conversational or better level, great. If you don't speak Chinese, go talk to your parents, go get a language partner, take lessons, do whatever it takes to bring your Chinese to a decent level. You can't be the "cool Chinese guy that knows China they can communicate with" without the Chinese part. I also don't think I need to explain the business and cultural reasons you should learn Chinese.
The Russians/Ukrainians are indeed more cliquey, but day-game trumps most barriers, since you can meet them anywhere. In Beijing, I've mostly been with students. It helps that I'm in school there, but you can go to areas where students go, like Wudaokou, or visit the campuses directly.
In Shanghai, the Russians/Ukrainians I got were either through daygame on the subway, where talking to them in English helps create a bubble around you guys since she can rightfully assume others can't understand what you are talking about, or through private events like a private wine bar opening on Fuxing Lu. I've never gotten with a Russian stripper girl at a club like M1NT, Myst, M2, etc. but a Colombian guy I worked out with in my gym did when a Russian pole dancer asked him to wait for her to finish before they went back to her place (he's about 5'9, fit but not jacked). So you if you are Latin looking, work out regularly, and have decent confidence, night game should suit you very well.
This post went on a lot longer than I expected. I may just expand on this to make into a proper datasheet/strategy of sorts in the future.
Dating Guide for Mainland China - Lostdreams - 04-17-2016
Quote: (04-10-2016 09:02 PM)swuglyfe Wrote:
Question here coming from an ABC, what's the read on gaming Russians in China?
I'm learning Russian right now for the purpose of gaming Mother Russia and FSU head on, but I figure if I'll be in China anyways quite a few times it can only help for my pool to be expanded further.
In my past experience with them (read: bluepill days), I take it they feel isolated and are mostly dancers, models (for Chinese fashion companies that only want white people to model and for cheap too), or mail order brides because the ratio's so fucked up.
If you speak Russian, major bonus points, but for frame purposes, it's helpful to communicate in Chinese/English, where you have the advantage.
PM me if you have further questions.