I've got some sympathy for her given the "mother of 4" part of this thread's title. From the article, the said "4" are a pair of four year olds, a three year old and a nine month old. None of them are school age and that nine month old is going to be screaming intermittently through the night, waking up the others presumably (if the others aren't routinely relocating from their own fucking beds to the parents' bed, which happens a hell of a lot.) Those of you who say you'd be able to maintain a normal or healthy sex life under those circumstances, all I'm going to say is this: try it.
From appearances this is not a career woman who gives zero fucks about her trophy kids. She's done the traditional thing we espouse on this website: she's a housewife who stayed home to look after the kids. While she may not be Maria Kang in post-baby terms, she has kept her figure together. Given the state of most women in the West at present she gets some major fucking brownie points for that alone, although I suppose that's a depressing observation on its own.
And I do think he has fallen down on his end. Why he's stopped going to the gym, who knows, but his pre-marriage picture had a distinctly feminine vibe to it already and I'd guess giving up the gym left his T levels to drop off at a cataclysmic rate. Maybe he stopped going when she first had kids and he was trying to help, or maybe he was worried about his job seeing as he is the primary breadwinner in the family; who knows. Either way, it's happened and he needs to clean himself up.
Having said that, I can identify the one aspect that more than anything else is likely to doom their marriage:
If he hates confrontation, or isn't prepared to assert himself, then he's up shit creek. You can't have two followers in a marriage like this where it is the traditional pairing of housewife plus breadwinner. If your wife is a careerist shrew and self-obsessed enough to ignore you most of the time you can get away with the autopilot of numbly going to work, coming home, watching TV, and silently going to bed, but it's apparent to me she's expecting him to lead the relationship and she doesn't like the fact he won't speak the fuck up and tell her he's unhappy that they don't get to fuck anymore. If you say you love someone but you don't have the guts to tell them when you think shit is not working, I say you don't actually love them as much as you think.
From appearances this is not a career woman who gives zero fucks about her trophy kids. She's done the traditional thing we espouse on this website: she's a housewife who stayed home to look after the kids. While she may not be Maria Kang in post-baby terms, she has kept her figure together. Given the state of most women in the West at present she gets some major fucking brownie points for that alone, although I suppose that's a depressing observation on its own.
And I do think he has fallen down on his end. Why he's stopped going to the gym, who knows, but his pre-marriage picture had a distinctly feminine vibe to it already and I'd guess giving up the gym left his T levels to drop off at a cataclysmic rate. Maybe he stopped going when she first had kids and he was trying to help, or maybe he was worried about his job seeing as he is the primary breadwinner in the family; who knows. Either way, it's happened and he needs to clean himself up.
Having said that, I can identify the one aspect that more than anything else is likely to doom their marriage:
Quote:Quote:
It’s like Sam and me: we tend not to talk about sex — or the lack of it. I avoid the subject, and I don’t think Sam wants to start a discussion in case I get upset. We both hate confrontation and would prefer to brush things under the carpet. When he does try to initiate sex and I refuse, I never elaborate on why and he doesn’t push.
If he hates confrontation, or isn't prepared to assert himself, then he's up shit creek. You can't have two followers in a marriage like this where it is the traditional pairing of housewife plus breadwinner. If your wife is a careerist shrew and self-obsessed enough to ignore you most of the time you can get away with the autopilot of numbly going to work, coming home, watching TV, and silently going to bed, but it's apparent to me she's expecting him to lead the relationship and she doesn't like the fact he won't speak the fuck up and tell her he's unhappy that they don't get to fuck anymore. If you say you love someone but you don't have the guts to tell them when you think shit is not working, I say you don't actually love them as much as you think.
Remissas, discite, vivet.
God save us from people who mean well. -storm
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