A decent looking lady friend of mine met a guy on OkCupid. Good looking guy, not a bad career, probably the type of dudes who takes girls on 4 dates just to get a kiss on the cheek. Whatever.
Funny story...
"Hank, watcha doing?"
"Writing. Drinking during the day. Eating leftovers. What's up?"
"I have to tell you about this date I went on last week. Can I come over?"
"Alright, but you have to promise me it's worth taking a break from what I'm doing. And bring booze."
[knock knock]
"So Hank, I met this guy on OkCupid. He's cute, decent job, and I'm sort of hungry and jonsing for steak. We'd been talking for about three weeks over messenger. Finally we setup a date at Steakhouse on 5th Street."
"I like Steakhouse... not where I'd take a girl for a first date, but their food is good."
"Yeah, me too. But get this. We show up and apparently he's told the staff that it's our 4 year anniversary."
"Like fucking around with you? Or to be serious? That's either awful game or fantastic game, depending on the circumstances."
"He's sort of serious. I get to the table and there are rose pedals, champaign, the works. At the end of dinner, they took our picture."
"That's a bit weird."
"It gets weirder."
"Do tell."
"So I'm not really sure what to think, and he hits me up for a second date. He texted me like six times in two days, but I want to give him another shot. I told him we could chill on Friday night. I like that he's into me but not really sure."
"Ok..."
"Well, Friday night gets here and you know how it goes. I'm spent from work, not sure if I really want to hang out with him, so I decide to bail."
"That's not very nice."
"I know. But get this. He shows up to my building anyway. And he's just chilling in the lobby."
"That's weird."
"It gets worse."
"I meet him at the lobby and tell him I'm tired, I'm just going to stay in, and I don't really want him coming up to my place right now."
"Fair enough."
"But he has this book. It's a Choose Your Own Adventure book. Except he hand wrote it, and hand illustrated it. With all kinds of options for what we could do tonight - which part of the city, which restaurant, this guy must have spent hours writing it."
"Oh yeah? I wrote a similar book. It's called 'let's do shots at local watering hole near my house, and then come back to my place to order pizza.'"
"Hank, I'm being serious. He actually did this."
"So what did you do?"
"I felt bad, but I just couldn't deal with it. I told him that I didn't want to hang out, and that I didn't feel well."
"How did he react?"
"Well, he wouldn't stop texting me. Over fifteen texts in two days. I finally responded that I didn't think it was a good fit, and that we have different interests. He kept texting me and texting me, and then finally stopped."
"Yikes."
"Yeah, and what's funny is I probably would have hooked up with him after the first date if he weren't so... intense."
"I'm so posting this to the RVF..."
"What's that?"
"Don't worry about it."
She's promised to give me pictures of the Choose Your Own Adventure book.
The whole story just made me laugh.
Funny story...
"Hank, watcha doing?"
"Writing. Drinking during the day. Eating leftovers. What's up?"
"I have to tell you about this date I went on last week. Can I come over?"
"Alright, but you have to promise me it's worth taking a break from what I'm doing. And bring booze."
[knock knock]
"So Hank, I met this guy on OkCupid. He's cute, decent job, and I'm sort of hungry and jonsing for steak. We'd been talking for about three weeks over messenger. Finally we setup a date at Steakhouse on 5th Street."
"I like Steakhouse... not where I'd take a girl for a first date, but their food is good."
"Yeah, me too. But get this. We show up and apparently he's told the staff that it's our 4 year anniversary."
"Like fucking around with you? Or to be serious? That's either awful game or fantastic game, depending on the circumstances."
"He's sort of serious. I get to the table and there are rose pedals, champaign, the works. At the end of dinner, they took our picture."
"That's a bit weird."
"It gets weirder."
"Do tell."
"So I'm not really sure what to think, and he hits me up for a second date. He texted me like six times in two days, but I want to give him another shot. I told him we could chill on Friday night. I like that he's into me but not really sure."
"Ok..."
"Well, Friday night gets here and you know how it goes. I'm spent from work, not sure if I really want to hang out with him, so I decide to bail."
"That's not very nice."
"I know. But get this. He shows up to my building anyway. And he's just chilling in the lobby."
"That's weird."
"It gets worse."
"I meet him at the lobby and tell him I'm tired, I'm just going to stay in, and I don't really want him coming up to my place right now."
"Fair enough."
"But he has this book. It's a Choose Your Own Adventure book. Except he hand wrote it, and hand illustrated it. With all kinds of options for what we could do tonight - which part of the city, which restaurant, this guy must have spent hours writing it."
"Oh yeah? I wrote a similar book. It's called 'let's do shots at local watering hole near my house, and then come back to my place to order pizza.'"
"Hank, I'm being serious. He actually did this."
"So what did you do?"
"I felt bad, but I just couldn't deal with it. I told him that I didn't want to hang out, and that I didn't feel well."
"How did he react?"
"Well, he wouldn't stop texting me. Over fifteen texts in two days. I finally responded that I didn't think it was a good fit, and that we have different interests. He kept texting me and texting me, and then finally stopped."
"Yikes."
"Yeah, and what's funny is I probably would have hooked up with him after the first date if he weren't so... intense."
"I'm so posting this to the RVF..."
"What's that?"
"Don't worry about it."
She's promised to give me pictures of the Choose Your Own Adventure book.
The whole story just made me laugh.