Quote: (03-23-2012 02:39 AM)Neil Skywalker Wrote:
Next time a pinay lies to you say this : Putang ina, pendek ungoi ! ( Fuck you, little monkey)
That's also a good way to wind up at the bottom of the ocean.
In my experience, when it comes to hotels, restaurants, airports etc. you have a huge advantage if you speak all or part of the languages.
When it comes to swooping girls in PI, its a huge disadvantage to foreigners for several reasons.
1) You lose the foreigner factor with the monkeys even if you are white. Most guys that get laid like crazy over there don't quite realize that the girls are actually looking for a leg up in the world, and not just banging them because they are an exotic sex god.
2) Since you have a firm grasp of the language, girls will also assume that you have a firm grasp of how things work over there when it comes to foreigners dating local girls. They're now gonna assume that you are ready to spend money on them since you are in the loop. Have you ever heard Pinays tell you that they are taking the day off work to hang out with you, therefor you should reimburse them for lost wages? Has a girl just stared at you when she's leaving in the morning like she's waiting for a tip?
3) If you do speak a PI language, you can sit back and listen to all the shit those girls will spew to each other, and use it to your advantage. I'm fluent in two. I hide it. I've had girls just ramble on on the phone or to other girls about all kinds of crap. 9 times out of ten they are just lying outright to you in English. With their friend sitting next to them though, they are talking about how they can get you to buy them shit, or how bad their herpes burn, or how they bet they got them from Neil Skywalker.
One of my favorite Philippines stories goes like this:
My brother and I were over in Boracay a few years ago. We meet up with this local guy we know through family. He tells us about this poker game that some other locals and some Russians have going. He tells us its high dollar and you gotta bring at least 15,000 pesos. We know nothing about poker, but were getting lit and said fuck it and went.
We get there and it's 4 Russians and 4 local guys playing texas hold em with a huge pile of cash in the middle. We get in and right away realize that the locals are speaking pure Ilocano, but we act like we don't know anything. We also realize that the Russians have major money. The locals were just openly telling each other the cards they had and plotting against us and the Russians. My brother and I took full advantage of this. These guys couldn't believe how they were losing and just kept coming up with more money. After about 3 hours the two of us each left with over 200,000 pesos.
So since we had giant stacks of cash we went over to Discovery Shores and started throwing cash around like crazy. We were still only speaking English. Rogilio, the bartender at the beach bar was just loving us. He asked where we're from and what we do. My brother goes ahead and tells him we're from California and own some big-money business. It's not often in PI the bartender buys you drinks, but this guy was loading us up. He's on and off his cell phone in Tagalog telling somebody to get there quick, and describing big stacks of money and guys from California.
After about an hour, two of the best looking girls I've ever seen in PI mysteriously walked in. Think Charmane Star look alikes. They started eyeballing us so we waved them over. These girls spoke perfect English. They claimed to be employees at Boracay Island Hospital and from Luzon somewhere. The clothes, jewelry, and whatnot that they were wearing probably cost most then the chief surgeon at that place's yearly salary, but we didn't say anything. People that are really into Filipinas would almost call these tens.
We just party with these girls. The whole time they are on their phones, and talking to each other in Tagalog every now and again. We listened to them tell us one thing, and then straight up go the other way with it on the phone or too each other. They weren't from Luzon, they were from Manila. They didn't work at no hospital, the best was that they had back up rich guys on the line for later. They have this plan going to get us to take them shopping the next day, but tell us they want to go on some boat trip. They badmouth hookers to us, and talk about how low it is to accept money for sex.
After one blew me in the bathroom, and my brother fucked the other one in a beach shower, this friend of theirs who was equally a near ten, and just sophisticated looking shows up. We checked into the pimp suite. The girls started giving us this lesbian show. They were snorting Filipino quality cocaine off their asses, and just going crazy. I took the newcomer into the bedroom and just pounded her. My brother had a threeway with the other two. After the sex was over we all are standing on the balcony, and the chicks were still sort of going at it.
For some reason my brother blurts out "Brah, mga batang babae ay mabaliw" (Brah, these girls are crazy) and all three girls just go dead faced like they saw a ghost. One of them says "you aren't from California are you?" and we said hell no. One says "so they know everything we've been saying" to another one in Tagalog, my brother and I just busted out laughing. They all scurried around real quick and picked up all their clothes and ran the hell out.
We got a little scared that we would get robbed after that so we just left the hotel. We get to our place, and still want to go get another beer, so we head out. First bar we go to, we see the same girls just sitting down with two of the Russians from the card game. It was hilarious.
We went back the next day and talked to Rogilio, this time in Tagalog. He had no problem telling us that yes he called a guy that called some girls. He also had no problem telling us that he gave them a piece of our tab and his tip. The best part was that he told us those were two of the top gold diggers in all of PI, and were in magazines and on TV. While not straight up whores, that's just the way it works.
The point is, if you do speak the language, just keep it to yourself, and you'll pick up on all kinds of funny shit.
Aloha!
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