[soup]

I know this may seem cliche after reading all the other beta-stories, but seriously- was this beta?

I was sent to Earth to hunt the superior species. I got a few skulls, but Arnold Schwarzenegger was able to lock me down by pinning me with a tree trunk.

Now, here is the crucial part, he didn't kill me. I had a nuclear bomb in my backpack and was able to set it off, in a way, taking control of my own destiny.

Yes, I died. But, I sent The Terminator running for his life. So, who was more Alpha?

[Roosh]

Aliens had invaded my planet and killed millions of human beings. We couldn't defeat them because they had force fields around their machines.

A smart guy with an Apple computer eventually hacked their system and brought down their shields with the help of a cocky African American man.

I got into a jet to take down one of their mother ships and had a clear shot at their main weapon. But my missile was jammed. It wouldn't fire. So I kamikazied into the weapon and destroyed the entire ship, saving countless lives, while ending mine in the process.

Was this beta?

[Handsome Creepy Eel]

Ooooh, extraterrestrial Betas! I've never thought that intergalactic species could be accurately described using this evolutionary framework, but I guess they must have their Alphas and Betas too. Great job, Soup.

[Yams]

How did I miss this thread?

[thegmanifesto]

Alright guys, its good that we are all opening up to each other.

(Wait, is the fact that we are opening up to each other Beta???)

Anyways, I have a little Alien story of my own, strange as it may seem:

My name is Michael Ventura.

I have been a Governor, a Navy Seal and a member of the Mongols Motorcycle Club.

I put together a little video of some highlights of when I was a Soldier of Fortune.

I am a goddamn SEXUAL TYRANNOSAURUS.

I also us a Gattling Gun type thing, that probably only 3 others in the world are strong enough to carry around the jungles of Colombia and dispatch FARC Guerillas with.

I also drop tons of dope lines non-stop like:

"Pay Back Time!"

and

"I ain't got time to Bleed!"

And

"This makes Cambodia look like Kansas!"

But in the end I get killed by some Alien with super natural powers.

Watch the video guys. I need an honest assessment.

Don't hold back at all. Tell me the truth!

Don't Sugar Coat it!

Was this Beta?

[Spike]

I am Darth Vader, i have my own Death Star, i rule galaxies.
I found out that my other son named Neil Skywalker had sex with his sister Leia and i banned him to the planet Earth where he traveled around the world banging dozens of girls and capturing many flags using the power of the dark side.

Was this Beta ??

[Enfant_Terrible]

You guys need to man up with all this Beta-ness and focus because I want to know what you think...

I sang for a couple hard hitting bands and when I perform onstage

I perform barefoot wearing only black shorts showing all my tats on my ripped upper body

Sometimes I knock out guys who fuck with me onstage. Here's a video my buddy took the other night:

Oh yeah, here's one of the songs I wrote, make sure you play it on loud:

Again, seriously what do you think?

Was I Beta?

[thegmanifesto]

Dear Rooshvforum Members,

This is serious, I need your help:

My name in Michael Montana.

As you know, I spend a lot of time in Miami, sometimes rolling with Mixx. Mixx has taught me about "Ketosis", but that is neither here nor there.

So, anyways, I decided to stay in last Tuesday night and skip Sushi Samba, and Brickell.

Some hit men from Bolivia were sent up because I am having some issues with my "supplier" at this tech company I work for.

I put together a little video of my Tuesday night for you guys to watch.

(I am the guy with the Custom Suit, the blown open shirt and the grenade launcher. Also, this should satisfy all the guys on here that are always asking for "pics" of me.)

I probably didn't swoop as many girls that night as "true Alpha's" like Mystery and Neil Strauss.

But now I have to ask you guys:

Was this Beta?™

[Enfant_Terrible]

[Tigre]

Guys, I need a forum opinion on something.

You might know me as "God".

People build temples and shrines in my honor, and have done so for thousands of years. I try not to let it get to my head. You know, stay benevolent and all that.

You might hear some guys claiming to be OG's. Let me tell you, in the beginning, there was only me. I put the O in OG.

I created woman. You're welcome. Next time you're railing your GF and she's all like "oh my God, oh my God", remind yourself that although she's getting it on with you, she's really thinking of me in that moment. Just saying.

Sometimes, I rain my fury and wrath on entire cities. See if you can find Sodom or Gomorrah on a map. Yeah, thought so. Not trying to be a dick about it, but I do this just to remind you guys who really runs things!

I created the world in six days. It turned out pretty good, I think.

Here's the thing. On the seventh day, I took a day off. Took my foot off the pedal, I guess.

Guys, I need to know what you think.

Was this beta?

[Roosh]

Alright guys this is the real deal right here.

When I was young my uncle killed my dad and banished me from my home, where I was rightful heir.

I met some other guys that helped raise me while teaching me how to sing a bit.

I decided to return home and confront my uncle in a vicious fight that eventually ended his death. I regained my kingdom and continued my bloodline, thereby completing the circle of life.

Was that beta?

[Tuthmosis]

So, guys, I'm hoping you can help me out here.

I had just gotten out of prison after serving a long sentence. Before I went in, I was a legendary hustler around New York. I came out determined to stay legit, but made the mistake of accompanying my cousin on a quick money drop. It turned out to be botched drug deal. Some guys double-crossed him and killed him in front me. I'd smelled a rat before hand and shot my way out of there, even though I went in without a gun.

Was this beta?

[YoungGunner]

Guys, Guys, I really need your opinion:

When my country was invaded during the deadliest war in modern times, I camped out in the cold as f%ck Scandinavian winter (-20 to -40 C) with barely any sunlight and killed over 705 enemy soldiers by myself with an iron-sight sniper rifle and submachine gun over a 5 month period, and I did it while keeping ice in my mouth to prevent my breath from giving away my location. Thing is, I'm only 5'3, and I got shot in the head a week before the day peace was declared and only woke up the day of.

Was this Beta?

[/size]

[Kaizen]

I love this thread.

Is it beta to love a thread?

[Thomas the Rhymer]

Guys, I need your honest opinion here.

I am Joseph Stalin.

My career consists of highlights such as : Marxist revolutionary, bank robber, propagandist, underground agent, and military general. I was sentenced to exile in Siberia seven times, and seven times I escaped. Eventually I became an absolute ruler of a huge country. Some of my policies killed millions, but that's okay, no one gets it right the first time.

Anyway, what has been bothering me lately is this: While I was studying to be a priest, I wrote poetry; here's a famous excerpt:

"The pinkish bud has opened,
Rushing to the pale-blue violet
And, stirred by a light breeze,
The lily of the valley has bent over the grass."

Was this beta?

(You can check out more info on my poetry by googling 'Stalin's poetry')

[Enfant_Terrible]

Hey guys stop with this beta foolishness already, listen now...

I love to cook and won 3 Michelin stars because of it. For a number of years I held the record as the youngest one to attain it in my early thirties.


But I gave all that Michelin star glory up because I want to spend more time with my children, don't want to kiss ass to people who don't know anything about cooking, and want to reinvent myself.

Other fun things about me:

I made Gordon Ramsay my crying bitch in his early years in the kitchen:


I also like to hunt:


And finally, I like to fish for sharks:



But your opinions matter to me guys... and I need your feedback about what I told you about my life:


Was this beta?

[Greeknewfie]

My name is Leonidas of Sparta, you may have heard of me.

My boys and I, the 300 Spartans were chilling at a hot spring spa called Thermopylae when Xerxes, the Persian King and 200,000 of his troops crash our party and ask us to surrender our weapons.

I gave him an answer "Molon Labe", or in English "Come take them"

Now, the forum members opinions me mean a lot to me and what concerns me most is, by giving him the option to come and take our weapons - Was this Beta?

[Marco_]

Well, I've lost chicks before because I just couldn't turn off the cocky, arrogant bastard and put the good listener, attentive and cuddly guy in his place when I was an absolute noob. It pissed me off. Another dude might've just turned into a game hater or something. Certainly the dichotomy has been overhyped to almost uselessness.

I think the corollary to Roosh's staggering discovery in Europe that not all women want your typical alpha male is that the ladies also have a kind of 'random seed' on their preference for both personality traits. Which might change during the day, ovulating status, whether she is drunk and whether she is a virgin, yadayada.

Getting good at game just got ways more interesting.

[Marco_]

... that was beta, wasn't it?

[hypesession]

Hey, my name is mike.

to most people, I'm a former professional boxer and heavyweight champion of the world known for my "ferocious and intimidating" boxing style. to me, I'm just a normal guy trying to get along in the world.

I cry sometimes because I'm conflicted emotionally and feel misunderstood.

I'm a little upset about an interview I had a while ago.

Was this beta?
What about my hat?

[Tuthmosis]

Ok, fellas, I've held back on asking this because the other posts seem so manly. But, one time, I fought in a UFC tournament and this guy started running away from me. In an epic move, I ran on the fence, kicked him square in the face, and knocked his-ass out. That shit looked fake, but it was real.

Check it out. Was this beta?

[Cookie]

Wow... With all these jokes going on I'm afraid that my question won't be taken seriously.

My name is Josiah Harlan.

I grew up reading a ton of books, teaching myself French, and studying the ancient Romans. I grew up and became an international merchant, traveling to India. When I got home I fell in love, but my fiancee cheated on me and married another. I got so enraged that I vowed never to return to America. Instead of settling into a normal life I became an adventurer in the East. I used my intelligence to become chief surgeon for Calcutta, despite never attending medical school. But I eventually got bored and continued my adventures until I became Prince of Ghor. Eventually, after spending some time in Russia, I did come back to the United States. When I did I was hailed as a hero, and became a beloved public figure. Eventually I even lead an army during the Civil War, because I hated the idea of slavery.

The thing is, I did develop one-itis once in my life, though in my defense (and so that you guys don't bust my balls too much) I did get over it pretty quick.

Was this Beta?

[michelin]

as my granny used to say in beta times: the beta you are the beta you beta get!

PS: Was this beta?

[thegmanifesto]

Tuthmosis -

Where does this thread rank in the all time threads list?

Has is surpassed the bigbootluver meltdown thread?

[soup]

(02-21-2012 11:27 PM)thegmanifesto Wrote:  

My name is Michael Plant.

I am the singer of a band, Led Manifesto, that sold 70 million albums.

I have slept with over 9000 women.

When I sing, women start crying.

Was this beta?

(Here is a little song I just put together)

Robert Plant is still going at it like us even though he's a rock star. I know someone who worked with him in studio recently, and as soon as they finished the session, Plant was like "Alright, let's hit the bar and get some girls!"