[Soy El Unico]

Been on two dates with this girl. For both of them, she actually kinda flaked, although we ended up going out but just did different things than originally planned. We made out on both of these dates. She's 24, an 8, and she gets a lot of interest from other guys. She also definitely enjoys dating around, although she sounds like she's open to more serious things if the right scenario presents itself. She also hinted at being jealous about some other girl I alluded to. I'm an attractive guy, although my game is still average.

Our most recent date was this past Thursday. I texted her the day after just to send something flirty, but didn't mention hanging out again. She also seems a bit shy at times, and I don't think she'll take the initiative to contact me. Should I be a bit more aloof at this point and not contact her for a couple more days? When I do contact her, how much should I press for another date? She also seems quite flaky in general... how should I deal with this?

I guess my overall question is how do I ramp up the attraction at this point? Pull back a bit, or show more interest?

[Lothario]

(01-15-2012 11:28 AM)Soy El Unico Wrote:  

She also hinted at being jealous about some other girl I alluded to.

Welcome to the forum Soy el Unico, You have a perfect angle here, The Jelousy Plot.......

Somehow be seen with this other girl and tell this girl your relationship with the other girl is "Complicated" Let her hamster spin ..

Quote:

I guess my overall question is how do I ramp up the attraction at this point? Pull back a bit, or show more interest?

IMO Do not ramp up the attraction, The goal is develop attraction in her towards you, Jelousy plot will do that for you, you will have an open window and u will need to bring it home.

Yes pull back a little...... and Do not show more Interest....

Happy Hunting......

[Soy El Unico]

So what do you guys think would happen if I just dropped out at this point? Would it make her chase a bit or just make her think I'm not interested?

[wolfpack10]

If she is getting attention from other guys, especially if she is young and good looking, it wouldn't be that hard for her to forget about you.

If you are going to consider the jealousy scheme as above, perhaps for the next date, target a specific event (winter festival, art gallery showing, fireworks display, whatever in your area), something that will have a set time, so she can't really alter the plans like the previous times. She will either go out with you (so make sure this event is something you would enjoy), or if she flakes out completely, when she asks you about it later, gloss over it and say you went with the other girl (the one she was getting slightly jealous at). For maximum effect, tell her in person, but let her bring it up.

her: "so did you end up going to that free concert in the park?"
you: "yea, Suzie and I went, yadda yadda yadda, it was a great time"

(the key is that she brings it up so you are answering her question, not flaunting yourself and seeming vindictive)

[CJ]

(01-15-2012 02:55 PM)Lothario Wrote:  

Somehow be seen with this other girl and tell this girl your relationship with the other girl is "Complicated" Let her hamster spin ..

Easier said than done.

(01-16-2012 07:29 AM)wolfpack10 Wrote:  

If she is getting attention from other guys, especially if she is young and good looking, it wouldn't be that hard for her to forget about you.

Bingo. Telling her in person is also key. Don't text that kind of crap.


From what I'm reading here you need to go blitzkrieg on this one, and date #3 is make or break. Unless you have a local event happening this week, forget that idea. Text her with my standard, "What's up?" if she even hints she's bored or open, tell her, "Cool me too, let's meet up for drinks at xx bar, and go from there." You're trying to get her to make an impulse decision here. Make sure the bar is by your house.

Now use Tuth's method and get that bang.

The basic plan here is:
1. Get her to a nearby bar.
2. Tell her "We should go check out XX bar."
3. On your way to the 2nd bar, say you need to stop by your place real quick.
4. Escalate from there.


This is all or nothing, and a great way to go with a flaky girl with options. That way you don't waste your time. If she doesn't want to meet up, you can forget about her. You can try a restart text a few days later if you like, but realize the chances of getting her out will be very slim at this point.

[Soy El Unico]

Great advice, CJ, that is a solid strategy. I texted this girl yesterday and got no response... so I'm pulling the plug and moving on to the next one. I will definitely file this advice away for future flakes and serial daters.