[wonderer1]

I've been dating a girl for 5/6 months. Just found out she is a high class escort and has been lying to me about various things and her work. Obviously this cannot continue and I wont be seeing her again, I've managed to get concrete evidence. Do I talk to her about this? Or do I just ghost her?

[Mig Picante]

Sorry to hear that man.
You've phrased it 'give closure' but I think it's probably more about your closure.

I don't like leaving things left unsaid personally, so I'd tell them why, it's like drawing a line in the sand and then move on.
You don't have to ever speak to them again after that.

[Sp5]

(04-21-2019 06:14 AM)Mig Picante Wrote:  

Sorry to hear that man.
You've phrased it 'give closure' but I think it's probably more about your closure.

I don't like leaving things left unsaid personally, so I'd tell them why, it's like drawing a line in the sand and then move on.
You don't have to ever speak to them again after that.

The main thing is for you to have legal protection.

Keep the contact minimal. Under the circumstances, maybe a text to her explaining what you know and a good bye / good luck is sufficient. That way it would deter her from accusing you of something, as her attempts at revenge would have a context.

The amount of hamstering involved in being an escort yet maintaining relationships must be astounding. Crazy, and a crazy chick is dangerous.

[wonderer1]

(04-21-2019 06:30 AM)Sp5 Wrote:  

(04-21-2019 06:14 AM)Mig Picante Wrote:  

Sorry to hear that man.
You've phrased it 'give closure' but I think it's probably more about your closure.

I don't like leaving things left unsaid personally, so I'd tell them why, it's like drawing a line in the sand and then move on.
You don't have to ever speak to them again after that.

The main thing is for you to have legal protection.

Keep the contact minimal. Under the circumstances, maybe a text to her explaining what you know and a good bye / good luck is sufficient. That way it would deter her from accusing you of something, as her attempts at revenge would have a context.

The amount of hamstering involved in being an escort yet maintaining relationships must be astounding. Crazy, and a crazy chick is dangerous.

what do you mean about the hamstring? I didn't understand. she is an escort but she wants a husband (she wanted that to be me)..

legal protection? what for? I never had sex with her and she stopped letting me kiss her saying she would only do this for her husband. I ended up catching feelings for her and wanted to scope things out more for a future. we would talk about passions, she is desperate for marriage and a kid, when I said what kind of husband are you looking for she said me.

now I'm thinking there's no point bringing this up, there would be 3 scenarios I can think of which would get me nowhere:

1. she denies and says it was a joke - I look like an idiot
2. she says she will change - puts me in an awkward situation, we know she cant work a normal life now.
3. she gets defensive, aggressive, says she doesn't like me etc - will make me feel more hurt.

I should just go ghost?

[travolta]

(04-21-2019 09:12 AM)wonderer1 Wrote:  

legal protection? what for? I never had sex with her and she stopped letting me kiss her saying she would only do this for her husband. I ended up catching feelings for her and wanted to scope things out more for a future. we would talk about passions, she is desperate for marriage and a kid, when I said what kind of husband are you looking for she said me.

Wait... you dated an ESCORT for 5 months and never had sex with her, and she stopped letting you kiss her? And you want to give this girl closure? lols
This belongs in the newbie section

[Black Caesar]

Damn bruh ol girl strung you out for 6 months without putting out and you were talking marriage and seriously considering wifing her up?

How did you meet this chick?

Ghost her and get some Game ASAP

[Barron]

The closure you seek is sex, but her pussy ghosted your ass months ago and she's been mind fucking you ever since.

Hopefully all that time and money you invested will teach you a valuable lesson. When sex isn't happening within the first couple weeks, manipulation most likely is.

If you decide to confront her about it, be sure to record the exchange and share the link here.

[wonderer1]

(04-21-2019 09:16 AM)travolta Wrote:  

(04-21-2019 09:12 AM)wonderer1 Wrote:  

legal protection? what for? I never had sex with her and she stopped letting me kiss her saying she would only do this for her husband. I ended up catching feelings for her and wanted to scope things out more for a future. we would talk about passions, she is desperate for marriage and a kid, when I said what kind of husband are you looking for she said me.

Wait... you dated an ESCORT for 5 months and never had sex with her, and she stopped letting you kiss her? And you want to give this girl closure? lols
This belongs in the newbie section

She is muslim and said this doesn't happen in her country (she is Uzbek). I also believe she was withholding to get me to marry her.

In the heat of the moment I wanted to confront her to get everything off my chest and see how she would react.

I considered long term as she did things for me, I spoke with her mum occasionally, she would cook for me, buy me small gifts (nothing expensive), travelled from Moscow to see me on valentines day (she lives in Moscow, me in London). I never paid for anything for her, she bought her own tickets, I didn't want to be a provider. Enjoyed travelling, as did I, was very close with her family.

she definitely wants a husband and to have kids. I don't know how she will ever be able to do this.

[Tinder Scientist]

You need to reevaluate your whole dating mindset if you allowed this to happen to you.

You are not "dating" her if you weren't having sex with her and much less when she stopped letting you kiss her...

Come on man... I at least hope you were seeing other women while this was happening.

The bigger issue here is not that she was lying to you (It can't be avoided and it happens sometimes), the issue is that you allowed yourself to "date" a girl who wasn't even into kissing you.

Also stop letting women dictate your life, it sounds like she wanted to long con you into being her husband and you were going to allow this?

Never put yourself in that position again.

[Lobster]

Get a friend to book her for an hour then you wait at the hotel. Pay her the cash and fuck her.

[Donfitz007]

this is 1 step away from being a troll thread

Ghost her with no closure, Learn game, get a better woman, actually fuck her.

I understand her effort is very attractive, but sounds to me she's playing you. I personally don't understand how she's and escort AND waiting for marriage but im sure I'm overlooking a detail.

[rudebwoy]

You don't need closure, the relationship never got started.

Ghost on her, no need for drama.

Lesson learned, you got played like a fool.

[wonderer1]

(04-21-2019 12:52 PM)Donfitz007 Wrote:  

this is 1 step away from being a troll thread

Ghost her with no closure, Learn game, get a better woman, actually fuck her.

I understand her effort is very attractive, but sounds to me she's playing you. I personally don't understand how she's and escort AND waiting for marriage but im sure I'm overlooking a detail.

playing me for what reason?

[Tinder Scientist]

(04-21-2019 01:54 PM)wonderer1 Wrote:  

(04-21-2019 12:52 PM)Donfitz007 Wrote:  

this is 1 step away from being a troll thread

Ghost her with no closure, Learn game, get a better woman, actually fuck her.

I understand her effort is very attractive, but sounds to me she's playing you. I personally don't understand how she's and escort AND waiting for marriage but im sure I'm overlooking a detail.

playing me for what reason?

She probably realized you have money and are easily manipulated. When she was able to control you for months without even having sex she knew you were a prime target for emotional/financial manipulation in the future.

I would say forget about relationships for the time being, you are obviously not ready. I'm not trying to be harsh but you sound like someone who is maybe a bit too "nice" you should try aiming for the other extreme with game so you can find a balance.

I will give you the benefit of the doubt of assuming you are not trolling, how exactly did you find out? And I'm assuming she knows you are wealthy. At the end of the day it doesn't matter, just cut off contact with her and don't fall for this again.

[PapayaTapper]

One more example..."high class escort"

[PapayaTapper]

(04-21-2019 12:52 PM)Donfitz007 Wrote:  

this is 1 step away from being a troll thread

Ghost her with no closure, Learn game, get a better woman, actually fuck her.

I understand her effort is very attractive, but sounds to me she's playing you. I personally don't understand how she's and escort AND waiting for marriage but im sure I'm overlooking a detail.

That detail is called "reality"

[Anchor Man]

Dude there is no dating without sex.Period .
Unless the girl is virgin and she wants to stay so until the marriage .
You were pretty her friend maybe close friend .
Ghost and learn the game

[gework]

(04-21-2019 10:18 AM)wonderer1 Wrote:  

I also believe she was withholding to get me to marry her.

Hard to know how she held off so long

I was in a situation some time a go. A girl did something really stupid. Not as stupid as what this girl has done. I got out of the country and told her what I thought of what she did. She didn't listen. She didn't deny, but didn't accept it. She just refused to talk about it. And she didn't learn her lesson, because about 9 months after I blocked her she contacted me with another number, sending me photos of her new gym body.

Dangerous shit. Hard to turn away a gym body. Luckily she sloped off. One of the scariest things of my life was seeing the deep, dark despair in her eyes as I walked away from her for the last time. Probably a borderline-BPD.

I think the best way could be to try and close this off in a nice as way as possible. You don't know how crazy she could become when you are of no use to her and cast her aside, after she had a big deceptive plan for you.

The kind of woman who gets into prostitution and then plays a chaste, virgin game is probably pretty dangerous.

You ghost and she could get angry and retaliate.

Confront her that she is a pro and she could get angry in retaliate.

I would say something final, but vague like, "After thinking about things I can't see us having a life together...". Whatever questions she throws, bat them off. Your decision is final.

[rudebwoy]

Do not confront her about what she does!

You will come across butt hurt and lose your cool, ghost on her and give her no reason.

Learn the lesson and thank your lucky stars it never went further.

Don't feel bad, I've heard similar stories and they didn't end well for the guy.

[Brodiaga]

delete

[icrus]

Women do this all the time without even thinking about it for a split second. Yet here you are, wondering whether you should continue being a good girlfriend after all this time.

Think twice about what the correct answer is.

[Sgt Donger]

(04-21-2019 05:11 AM)wonderer1 Wrote:  

Just found out she is a high class escort

Dude, don't over-think the situation...if you enjoy the sex then maybe you just gotta accept that you need to hand over some cash.

If you are wanting anything more than the sex...just tell her that it's not working out and go find a new girl.

[flyinghorse]

Drop her a quick message just saying you see no future with her and you want to move on.

[Off The Reservation]

I guess you Sir should have taken her to Dubai like she asked. Just think of it from her perspective, here you are a fine young Pakistani guy Sir with the lustiest chick from Tashkent who is willing to give up her lifestyle for you Sir and you don't even take her where she wants to go Sir.

Sometimes art can be helpful we have quite a bit here on RVF dedicated to your situation Sir. I hope it soothes the pain of losing that damp, pasty white skin you only touched on the arm a few times. At least you did Sir! It is better to have loved a little in your thoughts and in your palm than not to have loved at all !!!

[Mig Picante]

Wow, this is even worse than your initial post revealed.

You need some serious self development in order to develop some personal standards around what you accept and how you let other people treat you.
A sexless 'relationship' where she withheld kissing, has continually deceived you and you've gone and taken her on an overseas holiday? Come on, man.

You should not confront this person as they are a far more cunning, skilled and powerful adversary.

Good luck! You can improve from here. You need to recognise how you allowed this to occur and prevent it from happening again.