I did a quick forum search for YaReally's game archive but only found his [now defunct] website. Seems his archive can only be found on the Way Back Machine now located here.
For those of you not in the know, YaReally was a big time commenter in the early days of Heartiste and then on The Rational Male. He extolled the virtues of field experience and gave massive, in-depth replies to a bunch of dudes looking for game and lifestyle help. Most of his best material can be found in the archive. If you watch early RSD vids, he repeated (and often linked to) a lot of their stuff but took their lessons a bit further. Here's a choice excerpt on congruence.
And on being a short(er) dude with a taller wing:
Another solid one:
And on verbose txt game:
This dude gave specific, valuable advice and helped a ton of guys without even having his own blog, forum or youtube channel. This is my small way of giving YaReally a proper shout out so his lessons aren't forgotten.
For those of you not in the know, YaReally was a big time commenter in the early days of Heartiste and then on The Rational Male. He extolled the virtues of field experience and gave massive, in-depth replies to a bunch of dudes looking for game and lifestyle help. Most of his best material can be found in the archive. If you watch early RSD vids, he repeated (and often linked to) a lot of their stuff but took their lessons a bit further. Here's a choice excerpt on congruence.
Quote:Quote:
Congruency is a large concept. Think of it as a huge shell that covers everything. Long as what you’re doing falls within that shell, it goes over well. But while your actions are well-defined, that shell is kind of abstract. Confusing hey?
My shell is “I don’t care what people think”. So when I wear a fuzzy hat or a pink shirt or an Armani suit to a dive bar, I’m signaling that. But if someone teases me about my outfit or I get socially pressured to change it, my next action determines whether I’m congruent. If I laugh it off and continue to fully believe what I’m wearing is awesome, I’m congruent to that shell. If I get self-conscious and my state drops or I run home to change my clothes, I’m not congruent to that shell. This is why peacocking can spike a ton of attraction if you’re congruent to it, but it can destroy you if you’re not.
Shell: “Chick drama is silly, I don’t like drama in my life.”
Stimulus: “Chick gives you drama”
Congruent: “Ignoring it or scolding her for bringing it up.”
Incongruent: “Getting invested in it.”
Shell: “Looks don’t matter.”
Stimulus: “You see a hot girl while you’re not dressed well and your hair is messy and your BMI isn’t the perfect %”
Congruent: “Approach her as confident as if you were in a suit.”
Incongruent: “Make excuses not to approach, and go hit the gym telling yourself “next time!!!”.”
Shell: “I am enough. I’m a high value male, I’m the prize, and any woman would be lucky to get a chance to be with me.”
Stimulus: “Talking to a girl.”
Congruent: “Talking about whatever you want or what interests you or making jokes that make you laugh even if you know she probably won’t think it’s funny. Being willing to lose the set for the sake of self-amusement.”
Incongruent: “Trying to think of something to say that she’ll be interested in, referencing Glee characters, being scared that she’ll walk away at any second.”
Shell: “I don’t attach my self-worth to my masculinity or compare myself to other alpha males to determine how high value I am.”
Stimulus: “You’re Russell Brand.”
Congruent: “Camping it up and embracing your silly feminine tendencies and wearing crazy outfits.”
Incongruent: “Toning it all down and trying to act like James Bond or get jacked up to try to have football player muscles.”
So congruency is a combination of beliefs and actions. The “shells” are basically your own personal values, beliefs, morals, experiences, etc. But they’re different for everyone. Your shell might be “fucking a married girl is wrong” where mine might be “fucking a married girl is okay”. Your shell might be “cheating on my partner is okay” where mine might be “cheating on my partner is dishonest, I’d rather set up an open relationship from the start”.
This is why everyone loves characters like Stiffler or Finch from American Pie or Barney Stinson from How I Met Your Mother. Sure their beliefs aren’t most people’s, in fact they may directly oppose them, but the character is 100% congruent to them so we respect that and girls are attracted to it.
And on being a short(er) dude with a taller wing:
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My best wingman I head out with regularly is 6’4″ and way better looking than me and a Natural. But when I’m hitting on all cylinders, I can take girls off him. I don’t grow taller or anything, I simply display the attributes I know are attractive and dominate the set.
It was a lot easier when we first met cause I say a lot of shocking inappropriate shit that fucks with people lol so I’d drop something about how I want to give the girl AIDS by doing her in the bum, like a minute after meeting her, and he’d completely freeze up like “holy shit did he just say that??” like a deer in the headlights waiting to see if the girls slapped me or not. So right there I’d become the dominant one in the group because he’s reacting to me…so if they thought he was an alpha and he’s reacting to me, then they’d assume I must be a super alpha.
Now we’ve known each other long enough that he knows I do stuff like that AND that I can get away with it (because I smoothly pass all the follow-up shit-tests it instigates) so he isn’t phased anymore when I do that and it’s harder to take over lol. Now I’ve started just physically removing girls from him, like picking them up and carrying them off. He hasn’t figured out how to counter that yet lol but he will down the road I’m sure. The cat and mouse game continues lol
Another solid one:
Quote:Quote:
There will always be someone better looking than you, there will always be someone with more money than you, there will always be someone with a more defined 6-pack than you, there will always be someone with a nicer car than you…and the really high-end girls are surrounded by these guys so that stuff starts to lose its value because everyone has it. Hell, even SHE has it if she’s rich or high-status or a celebrity etc.
So what in your life is something that every other guy isn’t competing tooth & nail to be the best at, or even capable of being the best at? How do you stand out?
A lot of super hot girls end up with “weird” guys (like super artsy dudes) who make you go “wtf? why is she with THAT guy??” And then you hang with that guy and you realize he’s got a really strong frame and is super passionate about whatever his shit is, while the other guys around her are just cookie-cutter guys all running the rat race to compare dick sizes with each other hoping to get her attention.
And on verbose txt game:
Quote:Quote:
My txt game is wicked-tight. When other guys send a lot of txts it’s just gay shit that isn’t heading anywhere.
It’s like how someone who talks a lot usually comes off beta and trying to hold attention desperately…but then you watch Russell Brand flirting with chicks and its like oh, shit, okay that can work.
The diff between how Russell Brand blathers on endlessly and how most average guys would is that everything Russell says/describes is designed to take the girl on a massive emotional roller coaster of ups and downs and mental imagery and innuendo and teasing and push/pull and leading etc. so he’s actually packing a lot of game concepts into his verbals.
My txt convos never look like:
Guy: “How’s it going?”
Girl: “Good u?”
“Bored at work lol what u up to?”
“Just hangin out”
“How’s the hangover?”
“Lol doing better”
“Sounds like a fun night lol did you end up blah blah? Because this one time I blah blah”
“Ya it was! I only blah blah’ed once and then we went blah blah”
That’s the kind of guy who should just be txting one word replies because his txting so much is just “filler”. Like someone filling in silences with “um”s and “uhh”s. Its technically kind of building a little comfort at best but there’s no game principles involved in it.
My txting looks more like:
Me: “quit thinking about me, I can’t get any sleep when I’m running thru your dreams all night. Jerk.”
Her: “lol o ya I couldn’t help it.”
Me: “I understand you’re madly in love with me, but you’re going to have to try to restrain yourself. I recommend that restraining involve handcuffs. In fact I volunteer to help you with that. Don’t worry, mine are fuzzy ones.”
Her: “lol maybe I already have a pair”
Me: “of course you do, dirty birdy. I knew from the moment I saw you. I can read you like a book. I know your SOUL.”
Her: “lol ur crazy”
Me: “I knew you would say that. Now quit interrupting my workday to tell me about your 50 Shades of fantasies, I have work to do and I can’t balance my laptop on a boner.”
Her: “lol u txted me!!”
Me: “It’s alright, you don’t have to hide your love. Now I have to go polish my handcuffs. Pervert.”
I’ll basically just fuck around and amuse myself but all my txts involve combinations of pushing toward sex, innuendo, push/pull, accusations and cold-reads, role playing, future projection, callback humor, us vs them, etc. so I’m txting a shitload but on her end she ends up distracted from whatever she’s doing being she can’t believe the shit that I’m writing to her.
I usually initiate my txting during the slow work day (around noon) and late at night (9pm+) because those are the times she’ll be free to txt for a bit. If we pass 1pm and she’s still txting back then I pretty much keep her distracted thru the rest of her work day. At night I’ll drop more innuendo and see if she latches on and plays back and forth with me on it, at which point I’ll start downshifting into more sex discussion (stories experiences curiousities etc) and sexting because I know she’s probably alone in bed semi-naked and I can escalate describing sexy fantasy scenes of us and get her turned on enough to rub one out before going to sleep…and of course she’ll wake up thinking about me and I’ll be on her mind for part of her morning.
Some girls don’t know how to respond to my txts so they look like I wrote up above, just little responses till I switch to comfort and they can txt more because they don’t have to be funny/witty. But a lot of girls will try to keep up with me and play back and occasionally I meet a girl who can actually keep up and we’ll both send off big page-long txts like mine above. The attraction with those girls spikes fast because they don’t meet guys who can have them reaching to try to out-wit them and its exciting.
For stuff like meeting up a lot of guys txts look like:
Guy: “come to Club Friday. Dress nice”
Her: “lol I have plans already”
(4 hours later): “Cancel them.”
And that can work if the girl knows you well and you have enough value already and if you’re just inviting her to a nice safe thing like dinner or a party night…but I’m shooting for having her come over to fuck, so I have to get some emotional steam going like:
Me: “you should come over Friday.”
Her: “lol o really”
Me: “well we could go to a bar instead but you’re a girl and girls take forever to get ready so we’ll end up being late and then one of us will have to give the bouncer a blowjob to get in and I have lockjaw from going down on you last night.”
Her: “omg!!! Can’t believe u said that. And we never had sex u must have me confused.”
Me: “oh right that was a dream I had. My bad. I guess that explains the whole thing with the goat. And how I managed to last an incredible 31 seconds breaking my former record of 30.”
Her: “lol wow u sure know how to sell yourself”
Me: “I would never sell myself. Who would pay for a night of disappointment followed by a morning of shame, regret, and being kicked out for my pretend early business meeting?”
Her: “lol u wouldn’t throw me out”
Me: “no that’s just the ugly girls. You can stay for breakfast, as long as you make it. In nothing but heels and an apron.”
Her: “lol that’s how I always cook”
Me: “I don’t believe you. You should come over Friday and we’ll cook dinner. We can wear clothes though, I look terrible in heels and an apron.”
Her: “lol just dinner hey? I don’t believe you”
Me: “well after dinner we can sit awkwardly on opposite ends of the couch with a barrier of pillows between us to ensure we don’t accidentally cuddle, but you’ll have to help me stack the pillows. And if you turn it into a pillow fight you’ll get a pillow spanking. Troublemaker.”
Her: “lol what time?”
So again a lot of what I do is pack a bunch of game concepts into individual txts. I can come up with this stuff on the fly because I’ve been doing it for a while and my in-person game is the same style. A big reason why I can build so much comfort/attraction is that I’m demonstrating a TON of my personality with these txts. Like after an afternoon of this kind of txting she feels like she’s known me forever and that I’m fascinating and I’m easily the most interesting txt conversation she’s ever had. She’s laughed, been offended, been relieved, been qualifying herself, been excited, been mad, been puzzled and mystified, etc. way more shit than most of her txt convos involve with normal guys.
When I can do this a few times congruently she realizes “okay this is how this guy is, wow, I want to meet him”, especially if I lead it into sexual comfort/rapport building late at night.
You could say “but YaReally isn’t this dancing monkey shit?” But the difference between this and that is that the dancing monkey isn’t headed anywhere. He’s in one spot trying to keep her there by trying to keep her attention. What I’m doing is plowing forward like a train and dragging her along with me.
Like with the dinner txts above I pitch to come over which I know she won’t accept right away. Then I go off on a crazy emotional rollercoaster tangent, but I’m always looking to head back to the initial invite and I eventually return to it. So everything I’m txting is heading toward my goal of having her over to fuck. I’m never just txting for the sake of txting or txting like one of her girlfriends or orbiters.
This is just how I run my attraction stuff. For comfort/rapport I tone the crazy down a bit and get more into deep emotional and sexual discussions…but again I save that for night time conversations, never daytime. That stuff is where I’ll get into pages and pages of multiple txts because I’m txting stuff like my views on relationships/monogamy and sexuality and jealousy etc so there’s a lot to explain but by then I’ve built enough attraction that she wants to read it all and she’s captivated by our conversation and she’s sharing her pages of feelings/experiences, so it helps build our connection. Then the next morning I go back to playful fun lighthearted stuff because I know the seeds have been planted and I’ve laid out my groundwork for a casual fuckbuddy situ.
At that point I’ve already run all of the game I would run in person, we’ve gone thru all the mystery method stages etc and I can arrange her coming over usually to “watch a movie” (when she shows up I just pin her against the wall and make out and escalate right to the bedroom, because we’ve already talked about sex enough that I know she wants it), but sometimes I can get them to come over literally to have sex, like they’ll ignore their ASD and admit they need me to fuck them (then they get nervous right before coming over and I have to run some quick lighthearted attraction game to get over that last little hump lol)
Anyway so I do a lot of txting. My phone is always going off and I’ll txt all day/night long if it means securing a casual FB without having to go to dinner etc lol. My job is lax so I can just shoot off txts all day.
Some guys have money and time to burn so they don’t mind going out for dinner and drinks and doing this all then…but I’m lazy and poor and don’t want to do that so i’d rather spend a few days idly txting than waste a whole evening going out, buying drinks, building comfort, competing with distractions and cockblocks and logistics, her screening me as a provider, etc. that might end up with not even getting the lay that night.
Wasn’t expecting this to be so long but hey, there’s a glimpse at my txt game.
Also the interesting thing I found is that if I stay congruent to my verbose txts, she’ll eventually try to keep up with me. Like if she starts out typing like “wut u up 2?” And we txt for a bit and I stick to proper grammar/spelling, eventually (when I have enough value to her) she’ll clean her txting up a lot with me and txt with decent spelling/grammar like a normal human being lol I actually take that as an ioi.
This dude gave specific, valuable advice and helped a ton of guys without even having his own blog, forum or youtube channel. This is my small way of giving YaReally a proper shout out so his lessons aren't forgotten.
