[Balls_Hang_Low]

Hey guys looking for serious advice.

If you've been following some of my threads you'll know I just finished on doing an exchange semester in Poland.

I met a very good girl at the beginning and we became an item. We travelled to tons of places together, fucked 3 times a day plus blow jobs and anal. She's a really sweet girl and often helps me with whatever I need, be it school work or other things.

To cut it short she's pretty much ideal, only drawback is she's 3 years older than me and I prefer younger but that still only puts her at 24. Also her mom aged really well, so there's at least that. Also we don't share the same religion but she's willing to covert to mine.

I'm going back home tomorrow and she cried after sex. We've been practically living together for 6 months and love each other. I know 6 months isn't a lot, but I've fucked over 40 women so I know it's not oneitis.

She's says she's coming to visit me in my home city in late April. She's pretty keen on it but doesn't have the money yet. I told her to buy the ticket and I'll take care of the rest. Ticket is like 800 US since it's a long ass flight. I know her intentions are there but I'm realistically pegging the odds of her coming at 50%. I'm waiting to hear back from a top tier entry level job within the next month so there's a chance I'll relocate to Poland.

Anyways, I hate communicating through WhatsApp or Skype and if a woman is not with me it's boring. Even if she masturabtes on cam for me or whatever. I have a harem back home but would trade it all for my girl.

I do feel really sad I'm leaving, but think I'll bang the harem and maintain moderate contact with my girl until she comes or I go back to Poland. I'm afraid the passion will go down since it's not as exciting as having my dick in her.

She's finishing her masters degree now in a very lucrative subject so her dropping out to come is not in the cards right now.

Kindly advise.

Disclaimer: on my phone while pooping
Ps: I have an 18 hour bus ride tomorrow so I'll make a dataset about all the places I've been to during this trip.

[Geomann180]

Generally, long distance relationships are not a good idea. Neither are ling distance ones.

But if you really want to make it work, try to find a date that you guys will be together again. Something to look forward to. Otherwise, the distance will take all the issues of your relationship, be they small or large, and magnify them beyond your ability to endure or solve them.

If you like talking to this girl every day, or every other day. You'll have a higher chance of success with this.

But all that's fluff talk without knowing the most important thing. What do you want? Do you want to marry her and have kids? Do you just wanna keep banging/dating her?

Ultimately, if you don't see either of you getting hitched and having kids then you'd be better served cutting it loose now.

G

[No More Mr. Soy Boy]

I've had girls in other countries that have kept in touch with me for months so I thought I would give my thoughts. I also don't think 40 bangs makes one completely immune to oneitis and generally, I'd say it's not a good idea to go into a LTR (even less a long distance one) considering your young age.

I think you're doing right in lowering your expectations though, she has to be the one working harder than you for this to work and especially in the beginning while you're away. See it more as a screening process, you wouldn't want the wife and mother of your children to lose interest in you if you were apart for a few months so if "the passion" is gone when you're about to visit her again in late April, you know she's not anything for long-term. If it's still there, then that's a very good sign.

The other good side-effect with doing it this way is that you won't feel like you wasted much time and effort if it doesn't work out in the end or if you find out she's been having gangbangs with some big muscular African dudes while you were away.

And I do think it's important to have booked tickets too, try having that as much as you can. Like the previous poster said, it gives you something to look forward and plan to. Otherwise there's still that doubt you have now where you'll wonder if she'll actually come and that is what kills passion or what not, the most, I think.

If I was in a good mood and felt like it, I'd actually put some time in to make really cheesy videos cause it's my kind of humor.
For example. I'm good at archery, made one where I shot on this paper which said "YOUR HEART" in her language while I was dressed as Cupid and had some Italian love music. Might sound "beta" or what not but if you're doing things from a place self-amusement, it' the opposite. I know it was much appreciated and I think shit like that can keep the passion alive. If she starts telling her friends and family about you, it's a very good sign.

And if I was going to watch something on Netflix, I've used Netflix party which allows you to see shit at the same time on two screens, while I would have her on Skype.

+ Quality over quantity on texts, video calls and shit.

[Balls_Hang_Low]

Great advice from the both of you! I really appreciate it.

To update you guys she was crying a lot today throughout the day and swore she would come visit and somehow get to the money to come, even if it meant asking her parents. She cant already purchase the tickets cause she still doesnt have the money to come. We spent quite a lot of money travelling through Europe together. She's very trustworthy but without a clear plan I still have to take her oath with a grain of salt.

Based on my statistical assumptions the chance of either her visiting me or me returning to Europe to relocate there semi permanently are quite promising so I'll definitely try to keep the contact going. She promised to keep the nudes flowing so we'll see how it goes.

As for Geoman's inquiry- I won't get married with anyone, the laws are too stacked against us. However, I am still very open to the idea of living together and perhaps kids. I'm sure we would make formidable offspring together. She has great genes and I think she would make a decent mother. Regardless I do want to keep the relationship of date/bang even without the cohabitation.

As for SOY I've already stayed at her place with her family on three different occasions for roughly 2 weeks total (they live in a different city so we went for x-mas, new years, holidays, etc). Her parents are really nice, and they always make a feast when I'm there. I have no way of knowing if she told her friends since shes basically with me 24/7 and we don't hang out with her friends since they're in a different country, but I have no doubt were serious.

One thing that does trouble me is her infidelity, you can never know with women and two months is a LONG time without sex considering she was getting penetrated 3x a day, everyday. I'll have absolutely no way of verifying this unless you guys know of some method I dont. I know I definitely won't go that time without pussy so it's hard to not doubt she wont smash someone else.

[Mikestar]

I know how this feels, my long distance LTR came to visit me twice out of her own money that same distance across the world, it is possible. But if you choose to go with a long distance relationship you better be gaming at home and make her subtly know it, cos she will be doing the same once in a while, it's pretty much guaranteed. Once you have the mindset that she is most definitely cheating, you don't have to spend nights worrying in your sleep, but this is easier said than done, that's why your harem is a good idea.

You probably will have to speak to her on WhatsApp every few days at least, as much as I hate text message games, you will have to play them to sustain interest. For example, once in a while ignore her, change your profile pic on WhatsApp, keep busy and be unpredictable. This will keep her attracted to you even online. If you don't do this she will get bored.

I'm in a very similar situation to you Balls Hang Low, best of luck to you, just keep gaming and improving your life and let her sense it, then plan the next meet-up together and have the best time, then figure out where you wanna go with it over time.

[No More Mr. Soy Boy]

(02-24-2019 01:47 PM)Balls_Hang_Low Wrote:  

One thing that does trouble me is her infidelity, you can never know with women and two months is a LONG time without sex considering she was getting penetrated 3x a day, everyday. I'll have absolutely no way of verifying this unless you guys know of some method I dont. I know I definitely won't go that time without pussy so it's hard to not doubt she wont smash someone else.

(02-24-2019 05:25 PM)Mikestar Wrote:  

For example, once in a while ignore her, change your profile pic on WhatsApp, keep busy and be unpredictable. This will keep her attracted to you even online. If you don't do this she will get bored.

Do you seriously believe changing your profile pic on WhatsApp is going to make her all wet, push any buttons or do anything?
I would say that's a scarcity mindset and you'll be in the risk of putting unnecessary effort into her which you might regret later if it doesn't work out.

If you can be entertaining, exciting and draw people in with your energy just by doing things for your own self-amusement, that's great, but I don't believe in PUA trick techniques when you're actually screening her for the long term.

If she's a quality chick, she should be concerned and serious about wanting to secure a quality man to settle down and have kids with.
You wouldn't have to try and press all kinds of buttons just to keep her from not getting bored so she goes out on gangbangs.

If it's up to you to change WhatsApp photos just to have her interested, you're doing it wrong and have been kind of stupid to consider doing a long distance thing at all with her. You don't try or risk wasting time on a long distance with just any random girl, but it can be worth if it with someone who has shown completely outstanding LTR qualities.

To summarize, that could be a useful game for ONS and hoes from the night club, but not when you're screening for a future wife/mother to your children.

Anyway, I made sure the girl understood that we weren't officially together when I left her. I told her though that I saw something "special"/long term in her, but that I preferred if we kept in honest and real with each other because "I don't really believe in this long distance thing but that I would be willing to see what could happen and whatever happens I'd like to keep her as a friend".

So basically friend(with benefits)-zoned her and if one of us wanted to have sex on the side or date others, that was fine as long as we told the other person (but obviously I would have dropped her if she admitted that). Yes, she looked at me weird and disappointed when I brought that up.

After about a month I admitted that I had banged someone else during the weekend and she didn't seem to upset about it (her friends thought I was an asshole though). Few weeks later I told her that I had been with a another girl and she seemed okay with it at first.
Then she called me up in the middle of the night and broke down crying and told me how it was killing her and she told me how she has started to have to become attached and had strong feelings for me.

I think that kept her on her feet cause when I went back to see her again she had put in a lot of work at the gym and was treating me sweeter than any girl has ever done (and hey, probably made her more attracted since I had some pre-selection). And instead of me walking around worried if she was going to bang someone else I saw how she tried to prove herself to me.

So that pretty much told me that she hadn't been with someone else and the good thing with that is that I also got to bang two other girls while also staying true to her and to myself.

I sort of believe in this "trust and verify". As I went over to stay at hers again I logged onto her Facebook and WhatsApp and requested them to get all the data from the previous chat conversations she has had and it verified that she hadn't been talking with any other guys on there at least. Some guy from her past had written to her though, like he missed her and stuff but she hadn't responded to it (which she also was honest with me about, so no problem there).

Long post but to summarize I think you should put most of this on the girl to work. If she's rare quality, she'll prove it to you.

[Balls_Hang_Low]

Mikestar thanks for the empathy. Couple of points I want to address. She would definitely break it off if she found out I was cheating. She hates it when I flirt with women in front of her and would never tolerate the cheating blow.

I think the odds of her cheating are very low but the risk is ever present. She doesn't have insta, rarely goes on Facebook and has less than 500 friends there. All her online activity is on reddit. Heck she never even receives WhatsApp messages unless they're from me. She dresses in long sleeve turtle necks everyday and even dresses decently to the club. I need to ask her to slut it up cause I like her to be a whore for me at the club. She still turns heads though cause she's a dime.

I think your strategy would definitely work on a different kind of girl, most girls to be honest. But once in a while you find a legitimate good girl from the USSR who you need to keep things real with. She already knows I can get any girl I want and sees women approach me even with her on my arm. No need to rub it in her face I'm banging on the side.

I think I'm gonna keep it real with her, not let her know I'm smashing other her girls even though in the back of her mind she knows I can't go 2 days without sex.

Honestly I'm just bummed I won't see her for 2 months. I know it's going to be what it needs to be, we both recognize each other's value and see the potential for a good future, we just fell in love in a tough time.

I will update as the situation progresses. Would love to hear about your ordeal as well Mikestar. Best of luck to you to sir

[Korrupt]

Hey, to keep it simple, the most important thing you have to do if you want your relationship to succeed (and her not to bang) is put in the effort. Whether that's messaging or calls.

From how you've described her, she seems well put together, and a girl like that will go off the boil if you're not putting in the effort because you can guarantee, if you're not, someone will be around her trying to.

My advice would be not to let the comms turn to mundane, ticking the boxes, stuff. Also re-iterate what Geomann said about setting a date for when you will next meet. The flights don't have to be booked but it will give you something to both look forward to and discuss.

Also I'd advise to bang any other chicks you can, as that might give you a real perspective on where you see things with her. Don't mean to sound condescending but 21 is hella young, so banging other chicks might clear your mind (for better or worse).

[Buck Wild]

End it.

[DonnyGately]

It never works and if she's a sexual being she is def gonna bang other guys. Don't kid yourself.

[BlastbeatCasanova]

I hate to be a downer but it seems like they never work unless there is a definite plan to reunite in a few months. Everyone thinks "Oh not us, we'll be different and our love will prevail" but I haven't been wrong yet

[DonnyGately]

I'm mid-40s, I've tried it 3 diff times, not necessarily in love each time. East-west coast doesn't work. NYC- deep south doesn't work. East coast - Europe definitely doesn't work even if you fly back and forth every few weeks.

[the-dream]

Successful long distance relationships are possible as long as it is just a brief buffer period between being physically together. I was in a similar position to you before and it worked out well. As others have said, you need to have a plan to be back together (for a holiday is better than nothing but ideally, permanently).

How many years does she have left of her masters? Would she have decent job prospects in your country with her masters (assuming that's what she/you want)? Can she get a visa to live in your country without marrying you? Would you like to move to Poland? Could you get a visa to live in Poland? Could you get a job there paying as well as what you'd earn at home?

[Balls_Hang_Low]

To the people just saying end it without any supporting opinions I'd like to hear why. It's very easy to say next. I've dumped good looking girls before cause I didn't like their new haircut or because they got a big pimple on their faces. It was a different world for me 5 years ago. Now you start to value other things, it's hard to meet a girl who ticks off the boxes and it will only continue to get harder as they age so don't just say next.

The plan is she will come see me in my country in 1.5 months for 10 days. I have a job prospect in Poland with a very good company that I would start in August. It isn't defined but it is very possible.

She has 1. 5 years left for her masters and will make EXCELLENT money when she finishes as will I regardless of the country I'm in. I have no problem relocating to Poland. My country is pretty lax on migration, she doesn't speak the language though but she can work remotely I guess. I would make enough for both of us regardless.

We both have great earning potential but we are still students for now. Our parents could finance the trip but both of us are independent and don't want to go that route.

She has been texting me several times a day, sending nudes and checking up on me. We will see how this continues and I will update you all

[eradicator]

Either end it or start having kids with her(one of you would have to move)

[No More Mr. Soy Boy]

(02-27-2019 06:39 PM)Balls_Hang_Low Wrote:  

To the people just saying end it without any supporting opinions I'd like to hear why. It's very easy to say next. I've dumped good looking girls before cause I didn't like their new haircut or because they got a big pimple on their faces. It was a different world for me 5 years ago.

Now you start to value other things, it's hard to meet a girl who ticks off the boxes and it will only continue to get harder as they age so don't just say next.

I figured earlier that you're 21, but you sound like you're 41 and feel you're running out of time. You'll have a bigger chance of hitting it with a hot 24-year-old at 30 with more money, hopefully, more muscular body, life experience etc. than you have now as a 21-year-old. And you also got 9 whole years of dating until you actually are 30. You have time and should not rush.

Long disttance can be done. Hell, it worked more times than it didn't back when men most men went off to war for several months or years even. Obviously, there was a different time back then and women were of another caliber and didn't have as many options. And men too were also of another breed back then and had more meaning with their lives than being obsessed with sex and chasing new notches. But she needs to have traditional values etc. and be very different from the average modern woman.

Good luck.

[ViberOne]

(02-27-2019 06:39 PM)Balls_Hang_Low Wrote:  

To the people just saying end it without any supporting opinions I'd like to hear why.

They don't want you to get cucked

[Balls_Hang_Low]

UPDATE:

She made a website for my business from scratch while overseas. She has been texting me daily and begging to Skype. She sends me erotic videos that would make a porn star proud.

Best of all she bought a ticket and is taking over a week off of school to come visit me on the other side of the planet. She has a 4.9 GPA so school is very important for her and she considers taking the time off a huge sacrifice.

Anyways she's coming to see me in 10 days and I'm ecstatic. I know we'll have a great time together but I'm unsure what will happen after. As of now I have no reason or want other than her to return to Poland. She still has 1.5 years left on her masters.

There is an almost negligible chance that she could take a semester abroad here. Chances are extremely unlikely. I don't know how else our relationship will continue unless it's just us vacationing together every 6 months...

Looking forward to hearing input from all you wise gentlemen.

[No More Mr. Soy Boy]

I'd just suggest to not invest any feelings or any time into it that you might regret. 1.5 years is most probably far too long.

I bet there are people in history who have made it work (I even know one couple but the woman there was a religious virgin) but it's like expecting to win the lottery.
Even if you make up for your part to try and make it work, I think it's very unlikely it's going to last on her part.

Most modern women can be over the moon for you in the beginning, she sending erotic videos now means practically nothing for a LTR cause most women will only see you as source for a bit of validation and excitement. Once that honeymoon period is gone, I'm pretty sure she'll be looking around and wouldn't think twice before cheating.

[Obermarschall]

(03-28-2019 07:12 PM)Balls_Hang_Low Wrote:  

UPDATE:

She made a website for my business from scratch while overseas. She has been texting me daily and begging to Skype. She sends me erotic videos that would make a porn star proud.

Best of all she bought a ticket and is taking over a week off of school to come visit me on the other side of the planet. She has a 4.9 GPA so school is very important for her and she considers taking the time off a huge sacrifice.

Anyways she's coming to see me in 10 days and I'm ecstatic. I know we'll have a great time together but I'm unsure what will happen after. As of now I have no reason or want other than her to return to Poland. She still has 1.5 years left on her masters.

There is an almost negligible chance that she could take a semester abroad here. Chances are extremely unlikely. I don't know how else our relationship will continue unless it's just us vacationing together every 6 months...

Looking forward to hearing input from all you wise gentlemen.

6 months you say? So that means she can do an Erasmus semester. Look normally you have the choice to take an university of a list or you can do the free mover (i don't really recall how it is called) stuff, where you choose any university and organise all the papers yourself.
Since she made a website from scratch and is doing a lot of things unrelated to her master, she might have time to do all the papers to come to any university close to you. Tell her that and see how she reacts.

Otherwise listen to the others, they have very valid points.

[Zenta]

Not to sound like a broken record, but as everyone else has pointed out LDR's and event LTR's usually come crashing down at some point. I've tried LDR half way across the world twice and it just doesn't work out unless one of the participants frequently travels to the others destination. You mention her sending erotic videos that would put a porn star to shame. Yeah when I'm with an ex LDR that we cant help but fucking 6 or 7 times a day when were together, what do you think we are both thinking about when we are apart? Once your off that plane and back home, the reality is that video sex only gets you so far before one or both of you finds someone else to start fucking. You can't please a woman like that by showing her your benis on video chat every night when shes got a guy local that can be giving it to her.

Of course theres always an exception to the rule but personally being in that situation I've learned that 99.9% AWALT.

[MaceTyrell]

I am fully of the belief you would have an easier time continuing to bang her if you two aren't in a long-distance LTR. The restrictions will get to one of you. I'd recommend making her a fun escape (and make yourself a fun escape for her).

Speaking from experience, wishing I did this with my two long distance LTRs. Could have probably still been banging them if I ended things amicably.

[Balls_Hang_Low]

Alright guys time for an Update:

So my GF paid for her own ticket (700USD) to come visit me in Argentina from Poland. She took a week off of school and visited me for 9 days. We had mind blowing sex, all holes an average of 5 times a day. Super nice. My family liked her and approves.

Im going to visit her somewhere in Europe outside of Poland in two months. We'll see how things progress. She finishes her masters degree in a year and will relocate to wherever I live. So things are going well.

Will update as the relationship develops.