[sonderho]

Living at college atm with this girl and went out as a group twice. My intention with this post is whether to risk isolating in a college style environment where word could spread.

Second time I was more aggressive with seeking her out for convos and eventually grinding on her even though some other guy was dancing with her. Only problem is half the guys where I live are interested in her and are continuously touching her (to which she reciprocates in kind so I'm not sure I can really grab here away if she's enjoying their attention).

I isolated her once at a bar where we started chatting privately on a couch but then got cockblocked by a guy buying everyone shots and then she wanted to go back to the dfloor where everyone swamped her/us.

As we were walking back to college this guy had locked his arms around her but she called out to me and asked me to find something in her phone for her so I had her phone on me for an hour? That was weird. At the end of the night we were all in a communal area where her legs were crossed and pointing towards me even though she was talking to the same guy??

Tomorrow we're going out again and I'm gonna escalate/isolate by asking her to come into my room after it's done so I can pass/explain to her some textbooks (we're doing the same course). If she doesn't wanna come in I'm thinking it's time to move on???? I'm very confident in my ability to escalate if I can isolate as I get a gut feeling she has lukewarm interest.

She has a LDR boyfriend but hasn't mentioned it to me. She's not giving me strong IOIs BUT the reason I'm barrerlling through is because she didn't reject my grinding/touching ass/hip/try to eject convos immediately (which she could easily do if she wanted) which is confusing me - attention?. She doesn't seek me out for convos/touch me/ask me personal questions but she gives rich answers in convos.

The weird thing is that I notice she's real friendly/smiley with all the guys (even the ones I know she doesn't like romantically) but more reticent/evasive eye contact with me but when she does talk to me she always stands real close think breasts near my shoulders then steps back/looks away so I'm wondering if she's playing hard to get). Without being over analytical when she looks at me her eye contact is pretty intense. Thanks

[Harami]

Stop thinking.
Isolation is always the right move, if you didn't know her already. But you do, You have started being aggressive verbally, I'll take your word for it, now start being aggressive with your touch. I don't know why you have invested so much time in her, you will catch oneitis, she's giving everybody a chance while you just linger around, reading her body language, well read it better strike for the kiss, be the horniest sonuvabish, feel her up. You have the time to do this while you're going to the club, at the club, coming back from the club. 2/3 times you have already isolated her.

[sonderho]

(02-25-2017 07:59 PM)Harami Wrote:  

Stop thinking.
Isolation is always the right move, if you didn't know her already. But you do, You have started being aggressive verbally, I'll take your word for it, now start being aggressive with your touch. I don't know why you have invested so much time in her, you will catch oneitis, she's giving everybody a chance while you just linger around, reading her body language, well read it better strike for the kiss, be the horniest sonuvabish, feel her up. You have the time to do this while you're going to the club, at the club, coming back from the club. 2/3 times you have already isolated her.

Thanks!

Tonight we went out again for a trivia night (not much drinking) and I asked her to come to my room so I could pass/explain some of the textbooks (we're doing the same course). She agreed. We talked a bit and then sat down on my bed. She did lick her lips a couple of times. I sat with my leg touching hers but she moved it away about 10-15 sec and as the convo progressed I swear her distance from me increased. After a bit more talking the opportunity to flirt/touch came up and I joked about it's length by pulling it gently and she responded by curtly telling me not to pull her hair in a non flitartious way. We were talking about weather so I jokingly put my hand on her thigh commenting on how it was really cold (it was) for a few seconds and then when she didn't move a little higher up but only for another few seconds. About 10 sec later she mentioned she had to go to bed soon, and then about a minute later stood up to leave.

I just feel frustrated because I had her RIGHT THERE on my bed and I thought I DID escalate. I did consider moving closer to her face but I didn't want to move closer if she was moving away.

In summary, was this a girl that wasn't interested in me in the first place (but then why the hell would she come into my room?) or did I stuff up somewhere along the line like should I have moved my face closer to hers ignoring the fact that her body was slightly retracted???? Should I just have asked her on a traditional date? So close but so far

[Harami]

Good luck in future, you did good

[Harami]

Now to answer your questions.
Was she interested?
Yes. Even if she isn't, assume she is. Unless she tells you explicitly.

Did you stuff up somewhere in the line?
Yes.You aimed for the gold too soon, by moving your hand closer. Make her feel comfortable with your touching first.

Should you have moved your face closer?
There's a saying that never point a gun at someone unless you intend to shoot. I assume "Moving your face closer" means you wanted to kiss. Quickly get it out of the way, in a it just happened manner, before you get to the bedroom. Her body wouldn't have been retracted, if you'd made her feel comfortable.

Should you have asked her for a traditional date?
I mean sure, if you've the time and you know she'll agree. Have a good time. But I think you're just increasing your burden, I wouldn't bother, you're in college, getting ice cream together counts as a date. Don't spend money hoping to get laid.

Just enjoy the experience of being close to a girl, you give the impression that this is your first time.

[sonderho]

(02-26-2017 08:35 AM)Harami Wrote:  

Good luck in future, you did good

Thanks man, I'm feeling pretty shite about it. What did you think I did good in?

[sonderho]

(02-26-2017 09:57 AM)Harami Wrote:  

Now to answer your questions.
Was she interested?
Yes. Even if she isn't, assume she is. Unless she tells you explicitly.

Did you stuff up somewhere in the line?
Yes.You aimed for the gold too soon, by moving your hand closer. Make her feel comfortable with your touching first.

Should you have moved your face closer?
There's a saying that never point a gun at someone unless you intend to shoot. I assume "Moving your face closer" means you wanted to kiss. Quickly get it out of the way, in a it just happened manner, before you get to the bedroom. Her body wouldn't have been retracted, if you'd made her feel comfortable.

Should you have asked her for a traditional date?
I mean sure, if you've the time and you know she'll agree. Have a good time. But I think you're just increasing your burden, I wouldn't bother, you're in college, getting ice cream together counts as a date. Don't spend money hoping to get laid.

Just enjoy the experience of being close to a girl, you give the impression that this is your first time.

Thanks. I was hesitant to physically escalate because of everybody around.

Do you think I should let her go or just attempt to escalate again by asking her on a date/escalating at another event? We have a mutual party that we will be going to. Ie what's the next step/what would you do?

[Harami]

I would attempt again, you didn't get turned down yet. Learn how to flirt verbally in public, the 'push-pull' , the 'negging' her, basically just troll her. Go to the party to have fun, not because she's going. And talk to other girls too, you know she talks to other guys. If you manage to 'isolate' her again which I'm sure you will, don't hold back.

[augen sehen]

Why are you so focussed on this one girl?

Do you live with her in a roommate situation?

Are there any other girls you are talking to?

Do you approach girls in front of her, get them smiling and laughing even if you aren't into them in a sexual way?

What's her impression of you, do you think she would be making the same post on a womans forum regarding you?