Hey Guys,
So as my username suggests, I'm completely new to "The Game" and I was very intrigued to find that an underground culture of PUA exists- so intrigued that I actually decided to check out Roosh's book "Bang"- I just finished reading it, and while I feel more knowledgeable about the dating "game" I still don't feel confident enough to actually go about doing the things that Roosh suggests. I guess I'll start by introducing myself and telling you about some experiences.
I've always been a reserved person, especially when it comes to new social settings. I don't drink, smoke or do anything illegal like drugs, and I hate loud music and pretentious people, and as such, settings like bars and clubs are a turn-off and off limits for me. I'm not a prude, but whenever I'm around females, especially those my age, I tend to avoid looking at them for fear of making them uncomfortable (I tend to believe that they will think I am rudely staring at them). Of course, I do the occasional glance and look away routine, but never extended eye contact and rarely do I ever speak with them.
Some more background: I was born in the U.S but spent an extended amount of time in another country, and came back to the U.S for higher education. I don't have an accent per se, but I do have a mix of a British-American accent (hard to tell- when others talk to me they dont comment on it, so I guess its barely noticeable) Anyhow, its safe to say that my accent has never been a barrier for me. However, the culture shock I received when I first moved back to the U.S after an extended time in a foreign country was severe, and needless to say, I was very behind on the social scene for many years due to being severely maladjusted to the new social environment in the U.S (which tends to be much more crass and open than in other countries)
I had a few friends growing up, and eventually I adjusted to American culture and the social scene over the course of a decade or so. I was never really in great shape ever since I landed in the U.S, but I'm quite large (over 6 ft) and carry my weight well. Over the past few years, I got more involved in fitness related activities, (having been a bookworm for most of my life- I am in dental school currently) slimming down to a normal BMI and participating in club sports and the like
and only recently did I become conscious about the fact that I've never really had a girlfriend.
I've had female "Friends" in the sense that I knew/know girls who I talked to only for serious matters, like school related stuff, but never someone who I could go watch a movie with, or do something non-school related with (aren't those things that you do with a gf anyway?) To be quite honest, I've had a few encounters with girls where I thought they were flirting with me, but I never really made much of it. I think it had to do with the fact that I felt like I just wasn't up to it- I thought I was too young, or not in excellent shape, or not good looking, etc. I wasn't confident enough to go in and close. Some examples:
1) In one of my classes, there was this girl who kept smiling at me and laughing at my jokes (it was during introductions and I cracked some funny ones) and after class, while I was conversing with a friend in the parking lot, she came up behind me and slapped me on my ass really hard, saying "Hey cutie"- I was too shocked to say anything but I turned around and smiled, and said "Can I help you?" Needless to say I got to know the girl quite well, but it turned out to be a "friend zone" relationship and nothing more.
2) I was working with another girl, who was from a European country (Italy) and she happened to be quite smoking- we used to work in a fairly cramped room, for long hours at a time and so we talked about work quite frequently. This girl was very touchy-feely with me- always coming within like 2 inches of my face when talking to me, laughing, touching me whenever she got the chance and really was unnervingly friendly with me- however I never really made a move, because I wasnt sure what to make of it (European women can be quite touchy feely for no reason) She was also in the "friend zone."
3) I went skiing once, and this older looking, but smoking blonde came up to me while I was staring away at the mountains in the distance and asked me a random question- something along the lines of- is this place good for beginners? She smiled and seemed like she wanted to continue talking but I cut the conversation short by making up an excuse regarding the ski lift line. She smiled and simply said thanks. I got so nervous that I didn't know how to hold conversation for a long period of time.
4) In college, I've had to do projects and the like with some really gorgeous women, and all of them have been very open with me; I find that I simply go up to them and ask them how they did on a test or a practical and they enthusiastically make conversation and often end on a positive note. I end by asking them if they want to meet up sometime to study and hand them my phone, while asking for their number. I've never gotten a negative response while doing this- but again, I only talked about work related stuff, nothing more.
This leads me to the final question: Do I have potential? Is it too early for me to worry about "The game" and the dating scene (I'm still in professional school) Do my experiences corroborate the notion that I seem to have some ability with women? What should I do to improve myself? And finally, do looks really matter? A pic to give you guys an idea http://i.imgur.com/Z9hid.jpg Thanks.
So as my username suggests, I'm completely new to "The Game" and I was very intrigued to find that an underground culture of PUA exists- so intrigued that I actually decided to check out Roosh's book "Bang"- I just finished reading it, and while I feel more knowledgeable about the dating "game" I still don't feel confident enough to actually go about doing the things that Roosh suggests. I guess I'll start by introducing myself and telling you about some experiences.
I've always been a reserved person, especially when it comes to new social settings. I don't drink, smoke or do anything illegal like drugs, and I hate loud music and pretentious people, and as such, settings like bars and clubs are a turn-off and off limits for me. I'm not a prude, but whenever I'm around females, especially those my age, I tend to avoid looking at them for fear of making them uncomfortable (I tend to believe that they will think I am rudely staring at them). Of course, I do the occasional glance and look away routine, but never extended eye contact and rarely do I ever speak with them.
Some more background: I was born in the U.S but spent an extended amount of time in another country, and came back to the U.S for higher education. I don't have an accent per se, but I do have a mix of a British-American accent (hard to tell- when others talk to me they dont comment on it, so I guess its barely noticeable) Anyhow, its safe to say that my accent has never been a barrier for me. However, the culture shock I received when I first moved back to the U.S after an extended time in a foreign country was severe, and needless to say, I was very behind on the social scene for many years due to being severely maladjusted to the new social environment in the U.S (which tends to be much more crass and open than in other countries)
I had a few friends growing up, and eventually I adjusted to American culture and the social scene over the course of a decade or so. I was never really in great shape ever since I landed in the U.S, but I'm quite large (over 6 ft) and carry my weight well. Over the past few years, I got more involved in fitness related activities, (having been a bookworm for most of my life- I am in dental school currently) slimming down to a normal BMI and participating in club sports and the like
and only recently did I become conscious about the fact that I've never really had a girlfriend.
I've had female "Friends" in the sense that I knew/know girls who I talked to only for serious matters, like school related stuff, but never someone who I could go watch a movie with, or do something non-school related with (aren't those things that you do with a gf anyway?) To be quite honest, I've had a few encounters with girls where I thought they were flirting with me, but I never really made much of it. I think it had to do with the fact that I felt like I just wasn't up to it- I thought I was too young, or not in excellent shape, or not good looking, etc. I wasn't confident enough to go in and close. Some examples:
1) In one of my classes, there was this girl who kept smiling at me and laughing at my jokes (it was during introductions and I cracked some funny ones) and after class, while I was conversing with a friend in the parking lot, she came up behind me and slapped me on my ass really hard, saying "Hey cutie"- I was too shocked to say anything but I turned around and smiled, and said "Can I help you?" Needless to say I got to know the girl quite well, but it turned out to be a "friend zone" relationship and nothing more.
2) I was working with another girl, who was from a European country (Italy) and she happened to be quite smoking- we used to work in a fairly cramped room, for long hours at a time and so we talked about work quite frequently. This girl was very touchy-feely with me- always coming within like 2 inches of my face when talking to me, laughing, touching me whenever she got the chance and really was unnervingly friendly with me- however I never really made a move, because I wasnt sure what to make of it (European women can be quite touchy feely for no reason) She was also in the "friend zone."
3) I went skiing once, and this older looking, but smoking blonde came up to me while I was staring away at the mountains in the distance and asked me a random question- something along the lines of- is this place good for beginners? She smiled and seemed like she wanted to continue talking but I cut the conversation short by making up an excuse regarding the ski lift line. She smiled and simply said thanks. I got so nervous that I didn't know how to hold conversation for a long period of time.
4) In college, I've had to do projects and the like with some really gorgeous women, and all of them have been very open with me; I find that I simply go up to them and ask them how they did on a test or a practical and they enthusiastically make conversation and often end on a positive note. I end by asking them if they want to meet up sometime to study and hand them my phone, while asking for their number. I've never gotten a negative response while doing this- but again, I only talked about work related stuff, nothing more.
This leads me to the final question: Do I have potential? Is it too early for me to worry about "The game" and the dating scene (I'm still in professional school) Do my experiences corroborate the notion that I seem to have some ability with women? What should I do to improve myself? And finally, do looks really matter? A pic to give you guys an idea http://i.imgur.com/Z9hid.jpg Thanks.