[jariel]

One Time
This probably is not going to be the most popular post of the series, and I am going to live with that. The message that I am hopeful that you take away from this post is one that needs to be shared, and as you all know, I am not shy about espousing whatever may firmly entrench me on the side of the minority.

It is very easy to understand why people say what they say about men who choose to be a part of communities such as this one. Obviously, everything that is said and written is not true.

However, it is true that some men have preconceived notions about women, and a place like this is one in which all of their biases can be confirmed and justified.

I am an independent player. I do not belong to anybody's team.

I think for myself.

For all of my playing and shit, I actually love women. I think women have the potential to do great and be great. Have I met marriage material women?

If I have, I have missed them. I have made a conscious decision to spend this first part of my adult life, "just having fun". In the course of doing that, I have made a concerted effort to meet women who are just to have fun with.

The difference between me and others who have shared their stories with us here, is that I understand there's a line.

I understand that you don't knock up jump-offs.

I understand that you don't move in with strippers.

I understand that you don't try to do real shit with women who aren't keeping it real.

A lot of men are running around with women who are lost. They are so lost that they would need a map to find a map to the map to get found.

They understand their realities, but men will still pedestalize them because they have big asses, cute faces, etc. because at the end of the day, men want to fuck first, and do whatever else second, and that whatever else is often contingent upon how "good" the pussy is.

We could do more with women, but it requires that both sides find common ground -- this current war that we seem to be in with each other is wack as fuck.

A lot of us here are really faking the funk. A lot of us here grew up in two-parent homes with brothers and sisters. But we're talking about how "we never want to get married", "we never want to have kids", "bitches ain't shit", "women are sluts, hoes, etc".

I understand where such thoughts come from, I really do, and before I continue, if you take something away from this point, don't misread this shit, and say that now I'm advocating marriage and children, because if you are drawing that conclusion from reading this, then you didn't really read this shit.

Let me continue with my point.

A lot of men are fucking up. They are making bad decisions. Then after they've made their shitty decisions, they run here looking for consultation, consolation, etc. They fuck up with women and then want us to be mad at the woman, "Yeah, fuck that bitch."

No, "fuck YOU nigga."

It's incomprehensible to me that we can continue to play the games we play with club thots, bar flies, tinder tail, and convenient jump-offs, and then be surprised that we take L's.

It's incomprehensible to me that we can continue to fuck with loser females, and then be surprised to find ourselves as losers too.

Again, I get it, when you're just having fun, you look for those who are just out for fun too, and that's often the least common denominator.

That's why I encourage us as men to step our games up, so that we stop fucking up with the LCD's.

I've gone in a lot lately on the advice game, and I really started when one or two posters came out of the woodwork, jacked a lot of old advice, rehashed it as their own, and started perpetrating as "game advisers".

Somewhere they're putting a pocket square in a suit jacket like that's some new shit.

The thing about this advice shit, is that people are going to tell you whatever they're living.

The guy who tells you how to pick up bitches who work retail, well that's what he's doing, picking up bitches who work retail.

What type of life is a bitch who works retail living?

I can understand such a life when a chick is young and uneducated, but some of these bitches are in their mid-20s and older, so what exactly is their excuse?

What are you going to do with them other than smash?

And then after you've smashed a few times, then what?

You have dudes talking about being players, having harems, etc. and these dudes are taking the biggest L's in the game.

They can't advise you on shit. Why would you take advice from someone who is fucking up?

You don't let down your window when you pull up to the intersection and ask advice from the guy with the sign that says "hungry", do you?

So what the fuck can these dudes who are knocking up jump-offs, dating broke, have-nothing, be-nothing bitches, catchin' cases, catchin' diseases, what the fuck can they really tell you?

I do not pose such questions to suggest "listen to me". I do not care who reads these posts. I do not care who agrees. When have I ever cared about shit like that?

I write based on how I think, and if you're like-minded, then you will fuck with this shit.

If you are on some other shit, then you won't fuck with this shit, and that's perfectly fine.

I just feel like more guys have to start thinking for themselves.

You have to figure your own shit out.

You can't be like these lost bitches out here.

You read about some guy who's blatantly lying to impoverished bitches in a third-world country so he can get easy, bareback sex, and then you buy a plane ticket to said country so you can fuck the same dirty bitches.

You read about some guy who quit his job and moved to SE Asia so he can start his new life as a location independent entrepreneur. Maybe that guy had 50K in the bank, so it was easy for him to make that decision. Maybe he's a trust fund kid. Maybe he had connects who helped him get shit set up, and he already has a base of clients to get things going.

Everybody doesn't give you the full story.

Everybody's not doing shit on a whim and without resources.

Think for yourself as to what you want to do, see if you have what it takes to do it, and then figure out how can you get it done.

But doing it because someone else is doing it and they're making it sound cool?

Every wannabe Danger and Play and Bold and Determined type site isn't poppin' off like that.

I'll end by going back to this women shit.

Some guys want to have girlfriends, they don't really want to be "players". The problem is you guys are going about the shit the wrong way. You're trying to meet a girlfriend, the way a player meets some easy tail.

To quote the great Timbaland, "That shit ain't gonna work."

Maybe you want to be someone's husband and someone's father, that's great, don't let anybody tell you that's beta.

Don't buy into another man's definition of what's beta and what's alpha.

Have your own fuckin' definition.

Be your own man.

Live your own life.

I end with a video of a man who's had a storybook life. He met his wife when he was 18 years old. He became a college basketball star. He played in the NBA. He and his wife had five children. They have lived a comfortable life. Then one day earlier this month, while his wife was driving the kids home from school, a woman who was speeding in her car, and had her dog roaming around in the car while she was driving, lost control of the car, crossed to the other side of the street and hit the car that this man's wife and children were in.

His children survived, but his wife died instantly.

Some of you may not fuck with his message because he is clearly a very religious man. But that isn't the point. Listen at how he talks about someone that he loved. Someone who loved him. Someone who was there from the beginning and shared with him a life that they each wanted to have.

Contrast that with all "the bitches ain't shit" "marriage ain't shit" "Don't have kids" messages coming mostly from men who at best haven't done it, and at worst made terrible choices in the course of doing so, and figure out for your damn self what you want out of this life.

Who you choose to share it with will be your choice, but no matter what choice you make, the choice is yours, and there should be no fucks given about what someone else who isn't you, feels about it.

The following is the furthest thing from "beta" that you'll ever hear:

[rudebwoy]

A lot of guys will be upset about what you said, the truth is that this is the realist talk.

For the young guys, this is a must read.

Nothing beats having a special girl in your life, I am not ashamed to say it.

[Bear Hands]

Thanks for writing that. I'd rep you again for it.

[Cattle Rustler]

Real talk nigga. +1.

[robreke]

There's a reason they say "behind every good man is a good woman"

Emphasis on the word "good" preceding woman. It's true.

[Moma]

It's real. I also believe that if men want a real woman, they also need to bring something to the table. Beyond the sex, if you want a rider, it's a business partnership and men have to bring real tangible values to the table. Real values not cliched statements but the grit and minerals that your fathers (or grandfathers) had back in the day where men had no choice but to be men. Instinct, masculinity combined with intelligence.

I personally think that for a woman who has her shyt together, some dude who, for instance, is at home playing computer games and living vicariously through electronic expression is no good to her and I can't even co-sign that.

[kaeru]

Good post, I always respect a man who can commit and stay engaged into his relationship.

If half of the difficulty is finding the right girl, then the other half is having the resiliency to make it work through highs and lows.

Of course not everyone is looking for the same thing, so it's also about realizing what you really want.

[Chowder Head]

Damn Monty's eulogy hit a chord with me. Great post for jariel.

[262]

(02-19-2016 07:03 PM)robreke Wrote:  

There's a reason they say "behind every good man is a good woman"

Emphasis on the word "good" preceding woman. It's true.

Someone will eventually post that the supply of good women is decreasing - likely faster than the supply of good men decreasing - especially in the West.

Probably true, but it's been suggested or implied many times before on the forum. I'm just stating it here for the record, since that's also important for newbies to understand.

Why? That doesn't really help you take direct action, but if you must know, the answer is socialism - feminism is just socialism for women. So vote anti-socialist. But then get back to direct action - the self-improvement espoused on this forum.

[Fortis]

That was an excellent eulogy. Very classy.

Also, excellent post, Jariel.

[Ingocnito]

I had a minor epiphany reminder yesterday while watching Vikings season 4 first episode. Ragnar says to his son "When it comes time for you to lead, you must lead with your head, not your heart."

Guys need to lead with their head, because it's invariably driven by your subconscious which speaks to your heart and soul. Lead with your head, and your heart will follow.

I'm going through some interesting changes right now, changes that have been very slowly developing for years, and overdue a long time coming. I start a new job Monday that pays less than I prefer, but at a really cool company, with very interesting people leading it. Granted it's got corporate underpinnings, but I think it's going to be a pivot point for the final direction my financial future takes.

At the gym yesterday I spoke to a friend who I attend progressive metal shows with. Some really interesting cutting edge music. Found out when I met him there a few years back we knew many of the same people well, and he had heard stories of me in the past re. music, etc.

During the past 12-15 months he's seen me do well with ladies, excessively in comparison to him, and he can't understand the player side in me for running through the ones I did. He reacted as if I was dogging good women, as if all women can be made good somehow.

We'd had talks to and from shows on the road, about the real nature of women, etc. While he hasn't entirely "taken the red pill," per se, and still gets burned by bitches beneath his potential, he agrees that I'm onto something but resistant to admit it.

What I didn't lose sight of was the underlying point he haphazardly made, which was women have true worth. I never implied they didn't but he felt my actions with many of them meant I felt that way somehow.

So yesterday I asked him while lifting:"Man, have you ever really loved a women... I mean really deep in your soul where it counts forever?" His response;"Yea, yea I have."

My response:"It's the best God damned thing imaginable isn't it?" Nods.. Well timed Jariel.

[Ingocnito]

(02-19-2016 07:33 PM)Moma Wrote:  

It's real. I also believe that if men want a real woman, they also need to bring something to the table. Beyond the sex, if you want a rider, it's a business partnership and men have to bring real tangible values to the table. Real values not cliched statements but the grit and minerals that your fathers (or grandfathers) had back in the day where men had no choice but to be men. Instinct, masculinity combined with intelligence.

I personally think that for a woman who has her shyt together, some dude who, for instance, is at home playing computer games and living vicariously through electronic expression is no good to her and I can't even co-sign that.

The absence we've seen in women (in part driven by male thirst and the feminist entitled child-like attitudes and socialism) is the want to invest in a man's potential.

Find a girl who'll invest not in what you already have accomplished, but in what you could or are currently trying hard to accomplish. Granted you have to bring "some" shit to the table to meet base line viability.

The most attractive shit to a down ass real real women is a man in the midst of his struggle of life. A girl who finds that struggle uniquely attractive, the self imposition you bestow on yourself, may well me a lifetime keeper and well worth the ride.

[markus85]

(02-19-2016 02:11 PM)jariel Wrote:  

They understand their realities, but men will still pedestalize them because they have big asses, cute faces, etc. because at the end of the day, men want to fuck first, and do whatever else second, and that whatever else is often contingent upon how "good" the pussy is.

Succinctly worded

This was my major flaw...ignoring massive red flags on 'loser' females. I'd milk as much sex as I could out of dead relationships and it always bit me in the ass.

[Brian Shima]

These sessions are one of the main reasons why I frequent the Game section.. Keep 'em coming, they're hot.

[DjembaDjemba]

Essentially what you're saying is that the hot sidepiece that works as at the local organic grocery as a cashier with the neck tattoo, sleeve tattoo, sternum, septum and eyebrow piercings, cheap amulets purchased from the farmer's market around her neck, knitted knapsack, multi-coloured socks and a chest full of magnum xl condoms by her dresser is not wife prospect...shit...I knew it was too good to be true.

On the real, posts like this is why I still visit the forum.

[Svoboda]

OPs use of words make me think of tariq nasheed.

[AWright]

Great post, we all have to determine what our destiny is and goals are, not follow what someone else's is.

[Kaizen]

Incredible strength on the part of Monty Williams to deliver that composed eulogy.

[Iso]

(02-20-2016 09:04 PM)Svoboda Wrote:  

OPs use of words make me think of tariq nasheed.

It definitely sounds a lot like Tariq Nasheed's podcasts. Jariel, have you listened to Tariq Nasheed before?

[Marveloz12]

Great post Jariel

I think that we are all fucking lost...us as men but women more so..we don't know what the fuck it is we really want and use each other to validate our existence...

We spend so much time..improving ourselves..lift weights..reading this forum...all of this is positive enhancement, but its wasted on these lost low-life women...Like our lives revolve around fucking bitches..but that too gets boring after awhile..jizzing on the same predictable bitches and then kicking them out when we are done.

I agree with Jariel...we are all still in the matrix...we should place value on the things we learned from each other on this forum, but instead of following it like a religion, I think we need to consider this to be one tool that makes up the collective of each person...my 2 cents

[Dalaran1991]

I haven't read such a good post in a long time.

Something I have always thought whenever I visit the forum is that, half of the problems guys have with women could be solved if they stop hanging around and gaming women that are problematic. Of course, most women and most men are problematic and broken, we should go into the game knowing that.

Guys knew that, risked that, and when things got fucked up they got mad, asked for advice.

That's why I could never take those threads asking for advice on "sleeping with married women" seriously. I know guys who sleep regularly with married/taken women, and he doesn't ask advice. He knew what he signed up for, just as he knew you would get your hands dirty after you are digging a 1$ bill out of a sewer.

The same can be said about any type of broken women, not just married ones.

Then again, knowing what women are broken, are half of the game. The other half is knowing what to do when you find an unbroken one.

[doc holliday]

It's been said a million times but the l'll say it again. Most of these modern day women are broken. Most modern day men are lost. Many people are lost and broken. Knowing this, the key is to be outcome independent. Gaming women requires a lot of time, effort and emotion. You're going to fail more than you succeed with them. That's why there's so much advice about this being a numbers game. Problem is that numbers get exhausting after a while, hence the frustration that many guys feel. Then you think ok, I'll get married to this "good girl" and settle down. Well these days, even the so called good girls are broken. Modern day versions of good girls are still quite materialistic, demanding and ultimately insatiable. They get heavily influenced by their not so good girl friends and relatives and soon your good girl has gone bad and is now... Unhappy.

What's next? Divorce and the fight of your life. Unscrupulous lawyers trying to take all your money, a stacked against you legal system, and a chick that you still love but doesn't love you anymore going crazy trying to fuck you as hard as possible(not in the good, sexual way).

This may be heresy to say this on the RVF game forum but more and more, I'm coming to the understanding that the vast majority of women are a waste of time and other than sex and the thrill of the chase ( which is only occasionally thrilling to me these days), they're not worth losing my mind over. Outcome independence. I'll quote from a George Michael song " I want your sex" ( yeah I know, George Michael )
"Sometimes you think your gonna get it but you don't and that's just the way it goes".

[Thatdude]

Great fucking post, Jariel. Really hit a nerve with me. 100.

[spygoat]

Excellent Post. This dichotomy of game and love, life and work and everything else can take a toll on a guy. Thanks for sharing, resonates well with a lot of fellows I'm sure.

[markus85]

Add to the fact that these problem/loser women are low hanging fruit ripe for easy lays.