[turuk]

So I got to know this girl at the bus stop.

I was waiting for the bus and I was initially not interested in her. I noticed she looked at me whether I was looking back.

At one point she asked me something about the time schedules of the buses. It was such an obvious question she already knew the answer to which made me think she wanted attention or maybe even more.

I just made some basic small talk about that the time tables are little bit confusing and the buses not always coming on time. They were quite receptive. She asked me couple of personal questions. By this time we were in the bus. I ran the GALNUC routine.

I kind of put minimal effort into the whole interaction. Especially at the end. I noticed she wanted to keep the interaction going the whole time by throwing in desperate comments and questions. At one point she told me she had to step out and asked me if I wanted to exchange numbers. I said yes and she hastily put my number in her phone before walking out.

One day later I sent her a message that it was nice to meet her and we had some chit chat through msg.

Two days later I asked her what she was doing in the weekend. She said "I don't know but if you want to go out ask me". I'm new in the city so she recommend some clubs. I asked her if she wanted to go out, she said she was not sure and would contact me whether she could or not. I didn't get an answer for a week so I decided to try second time. I got flaked again. I'm not going to ask her for third time.

Can somebody explain me what is going on? During my pick-up she was double as much invested into the conversation than me. She asked my number and on whatsapp she said "if you want to go out ASK ME". As far as I know I didn't show any beta charachteristics. Was it the way I asked her out? I'm kind of confused. She was just a 7 so I'm not disappointed or something but this happened to me couple of times earlier.

[polymath]

Maybe she was turned off by how passive you were. Try to lead the conversation by suggesting something next time.

It's hard in a new city, but think about what you would do if you were in your own hometown. You would say, "hey, do you want to go to X bar with me and my friends this Friday" or whatever. You would suggest something.

I get the impression that at first you came off as aloof, but in the end you came off as unassertive.

"If you want to go out ASK ME" is a pretty clear sign that you should have done more to lead the situation IMO. Assuming you actually wanted to go out.

[turuk]

(05-29-2014 03:31 PM)polymath Wrote:  

Maybe she was turned off by how passive you were. Try to lead the conversation by suggesting something next time.

It's hard in a new city, but think about what you would do if you were in your own hometown. You would say, "hey, do you want to go to X bar with me and my friends this Friday" or whatever. You would suggest something.

I get the impression that at first you came off as aloof, but in the end you came off as unassertive.

"If you want to go out ASK ME" is a pretty clear sign that you should have done more to lead the situation IMO. Assuming you actually wanted to go out.

People tell me I'm non assertive but maybe I explained it wrong. I did bring up topics in the conversation I was just less invested as her which is IMHO alpha male characteristic. Also when she said "if you want to go out, ask me" I asked her out couple of days after and she flaked. I asked her on a wednesday to go out in the weekends (more precisely I suggested Saturday) and she said her agenda was not clear and she would inform me. She didn't. Also not after the second time I asked.

[amity]

Anglosphere women tend to be hot and cold anyway I find, as often as not.
Chalk it down to experience bro.
You'll get better with experience, just keep interacting with women, and more opportunities will arise.