[nek]

they want to start a family. Ask them, "at the price of little to no sex?". I saw some dude ask this question directly to a younger buddy of mine and I could see him (the younger buddy) deflate immediately. While I won't knock marriage one way or another, I think the sex issue is something that men need to be directly challenged on, as they don't think it's realistically gonna happen to them. This is especially true for young guys thinking about tying the knot. I'm not saying this is the situation in all marriages, but rarely do I hear much of the opposite.

[Col. Tigh]

(12-03-2013 08:56 PM)nek Wrote:  

they want to start a family. Ask them, "at the price of little to no sex?". I saw some dude ask this question directly to a younger buddy of mine and I could see him (the younger buddy) deflate immediately. While I won't knock marriage one way or another, I think the sex issue is something that men need to be directly challenged on, as they don't think it's realistically gonna happen to them. This is especially true for young guys thinking about tying the knot. I'm not saying this is the situation in all marriages, but rarely do I hear much of the opposite.

I've been married twelve years, with three kids, and still bang my wife on the regular--about four to six times a week. No complaints about her performance, either. I imagine many marriages don't lack sex per se. To give credit where it's due, I've no doubt that I've had far more sexual intercourse as a married man than I would have as a swingin' single guy, even with effective game.

Rather, the problem with marriage is the frustration of being restricted to sex with just one woman. Despite remaining attracted to her plenty, nonetheless the craving for strange pussy (even of a lower attractiveness level than my wife) came on with a vengeance after a few years.

[Christian McQueen]

^Without derailing the thread, could you explain how you resisted the urges for strange?

[Suits]

(12-03-2013 10:39 PM)Col. Tigh Wrote:  

(12-03-2013 08:56 PM)nek Wrote:  

they want to start a family. Ask them, "at the price of little to no sex?". I saw some dude ask this question directly to a younger buddy of mine and I could see him (the younger buddy) deflate immediately. While I won't knock marriage one way or another, I think the sex issue is something that men need to be directly challenged on, as they don't think it's realistically gonna happen to them. This is especially true for young guys thinking about tying the knot. I'm not saying this is the situation in all marriages, but rarely do I hear much of the opposite.

I've been married twelve years, with three kids, and still bang my wife on the regular--about four to six times a week. No complaints about her performance, either. I imagine many marriages don't lack sex per se. To give credit where it's due, I've no doubt that I've had far more sexual intercourse as a married man than I would have as a swingin' single guy, even with effective game.

Rather, the problem with marriage is the frustration of being restricted to sex with just one woman. Despite remaining attracted to her plenty, nonetheless the craving for strange pussy (even of a lower attractiveness level than my wife) came on with a vengeance after a few years.

Sure, but the relevant statistics are pretty daunting.

[Alpharius]

(12-03-2013 10:39 PM)Col. Tigh Wrote:  

Rather, the problem with marriage is the frustration of being restricted to sex with just one woman. Despite remaining attracted to her plenty, nonetheless the craving for strange pussy (even of a lower attractiveness level than my wife) came on with a vengeance after a few years.

I can see this being more of a problem than a lot of other things.

Married guys in a sexually healthy relationship would likely get more than unmarried guys I'd think. Sex is available readily and on hand, one would imagine.

[Vendetta]

(12-03-2013 10:39 PM)Col. Tigh Wrote:  

Rather, the problem with marriage is the frustration of being restricted to sex with just one woman. Despite remaining attracted to her plenty, nonetheless the craving for strange pussy (even of a lower attractiveness level than my wife) came on with a vengeance after a few years.

This is a problem I have with even just girlfriends - and it sets in after about the 4th bang.

That's why I want to get to the 500 lay point (nowhere near) and then maybe I would feel like "I'd had enough" and could settle down with just one to make a family with.

More realistically, I think I need a set-up where I make an agreement with a woman that we create a family but I live separately when I want, with my own life, including seeing other girls and we come together regularly to raise the kids, just like a normal family.

But for me to be tied down into that one house, one wife, one life... No No No!!!

The idea fills me with dread - I am nomadic at heart for sure.

[Lucario]

I don't even like to use the sex card because you still have those purple pill dudes( guy between blue pill and red pill thinking) who believe they have found a woman who will love them and give out consistent sex...these guys do not know the true nature of women and how proficient women are at manipulating blue pill guys.

Plus all that Hollywood bullshit about romance...no-red pill men also by into that big bucket of bullshit Hollywood has in their backyard.

The best thing I use is " how does it feel to know that if anything goes wrong in 7-8 years, that you will have barely any custody over the kids, lose 80% of you wealth and have to pay a huge alimony...even if you get a prenup" ....I find this works better.

Now if I know the guy has good game I don't bother with telling him all this, because chances are he will get sex throughout the marriage.

[Vicious]

Suits, what "relevant statistics"?

[kingjuice]

I'm just gonna leave this here:

[Akula]

(12-03-2013 10:39 PM)Col. Tigh Wrote:  

(12-03-2013 08:56 PM)nek Wrote:  

they want to start a family. Ask them, "at the price of little to no sex?". I saw some dude ask this question directly to a younger buddy of mine and I could see him (the younger buddy) deflate immediately. While I won't knock marriage one way or another, I think the sex issue is something that men need to be directly challenged on, as they don't think it's realistically gonna happen to them. This is especially true for young guys thinking about tying the knot. I'm not saying this is the situation in all marriages, but rarely do I hear much of the opposite.

I've been married twelve years, with three kids, and still bang my wife on the regular--about four to six times a week. No complaints about her performance, either. I imagine many marriages don't lack sex per se. To give credit where it's due, I've no doubt that I've had far more sexual intercourse as a married man than I would have as a swingin' single guy, even with effective game.

Rather, the problem with marriage is the frustration of being restricted to sex with just one woman. Despite remaining attracted to her plenty, nonetheless the craving for strange pussy (even of a lower attractiveness level than my wife) came on with a vengeance after a few years.

Really happy for you Col. Tigh, but I think you're an anomaly and using your own experience as what's typical, which I think from what I know and have seen is far from the case, at least in the US. I know tons of ex-classmates and colleagues who have told me point blank they have sex maybe once a week or month even at best. And I know several guys with kids who said they frankly rarely have sex. BJs seem to go by the wayside FAST in marriage scenarios from what I know.

That's a small sample size I'm using too, for sure, so I'd love to see some statistics, but assume they aren't pretty, especially after say 4-5 years of marraige (and b@nging the same girl, not matter how attractive, over and over - I get tired of that after 2-3 months).

Once in marriage, IMO once a woman doesn't fulfill her sex part of the bargain a man has full right to stray. That doesnt' mean he should just bang any strange he meets on the street and become a total disease/AIDS hazard, but its a total joke how in modern-day American men aren't allowed any leeway on this, especially in the divorce courts. Women need to own up to their end of the bargain - which most clearly are not doing (nor are they incentivized to do so in our PC, feminized burgeoning police state Anglosphere countries).

[KorbenDallas]

Just don't get married in the US. Don't sign any contracts either. My plan? Keep stacking cash for the next ten years while getting enough action as I can here in Europe, then settling down with a sexy girl under 20 from Eastern Europe or Russia in South America or Eastern Europe. This is said a lot here, but American girls, though some can be fine as a fiddle are not for long term things.

[Akula]

(12-04-2013 04:15 AM)KorbenDallas Wrote:  

Just don't get married in the US. Don't sign any contracts either. My plan? Keep stacking cash for the next ten years while getting enough action as I can here in Europe, then settling down with a sexy girl under 20 from Eastern Europe or Russia in South America or Eastern Europe. This is said a lot here, but American girls, though some can be fine as a fiddle are not for long term things.

I hear you loud and clear but I assume that divorce laws in Europe (including the EU Eastern European countries) are trending bad towards marriage as well - i.e. they are becoming increasingly anti-male and draconian towards men in a 'meltdown' scenario even when it's the woman's fault or both parties decide to go their own way.

Moving the family to S. American sounds ok, but taking them so far from home completely destroys the family support system if you intend to have kids and want some help from the babushka, so I think it might not be as good of an option as it sounds.

And it's funny but being in Russia I am starting to see the benefits of having an EU country EE girl from Poland, Czech, Slovakia or Croatia just to get the benefits. I feel like having a Russian girlfriend/wife gets me nothing right now (I'm older so having thoughs of kids/marriage more and more these days). Russian passport not really worth all that much really.

[Col. Tigh]

(12-03-2013 11:00 PM)McQueensPlayboyRules Wrote:  

^Without derailing the thread, could you explain how you resisted the urges for strange?

Eventually I stopped resisting it, and I had sex with other women.

The aftermath was predictable. However, the marriage remained intact and, strangely enough (or not, if you understand female psychology as this forum does), my wife seems more strongly bonded to me than before. I won't deny that the resulting fights were epic and nearly collapsed the union, but I convinced my wife of the truth--that I had no intention of dissolving our marriage or leaving her and our children, and had fucked other women purely for the sex.

The other women I laid using bar and club game. I never romanced or "wined and dined" them or engaged in long phone conversations--it was just classic night game, with at most one "date" (hookah bar for drinks, then to her place for the bang) or a one night stand. Because indeed, I only wanted them for sex.

[Col. Tigh]

(12-04-2013 03:48 AM)Akula Wrote:  

Really happy for you Col. Tigh, but I think you're an anomaly and using your own experience as what's typical, which I think from what I know and have seen is far from the case, at least in the US. I know tons of ex-classmates and colleagues who have told me point blank they have sex maybe once a week or month even at best. And I know several guys with kids who said they frankly rarely have sex. BJs seem to go by the wayside FAST in marriage scenarios from what I know.

I don't dispute that my situation might not be the most common one. I also am aware of many sexless marriages, which is a tragedy.

[cardguy]

@Akula - you make a good point. It is fucking bullshit that women flip out over men cheating on them. Whilst at the same time having no interest in sleeping with their husbands on a regular basis.

The hypocrisy is stunning. But nobody ever likes to talk to women straight on these issues.

[j r]

Are the number of sexless marriages that much more than the number of sexless beta males in any given society?

[Flavius Aetius]

(12-04-2013 09:59 AM)Col. Tigh Wrote:  

Eventually I stopped resisting it, and I had sex with other women.

The aftermath was predictable. However, the marriage remained intact and, strangely enough (or not, if you understand female psychology as this forum does), my wife seems more strongly bonded to me than before.

I understand that cheating desire.

question here-Did you tell you wife or did she find out? I thought the whole purpose of having affairs was to keep them secret--especially if you have children.

Regarding the issue of less sex in marriage---it is because of kids. The first year of a kid's life daddy gets no sex because mommy is massively busy taking care of baby and sleep deprived. Daddy is busy as hell too and sleep deprived--getting up multiple times a night because baby is crying and then going to work at 7:00am. Your sex drive drops to zero. (source I had an relationship with a milf who had 4 kids)

Even without kids, sex drops off gradually in marriages. Why? Having sex with the same person over and over gets repetitive. You can be creative, enthusiastic, adventurous, etc, but in the final analysis you are having sex with the same person. Your brain craves stimulation and new experiences.

(12-04-2013 03:48 AM)Akula Wrote:  

Once in marriage, IMO once a woman doesn't fulfill her sex part of the bargain a man has full right to stray.

Prior to the 1970's you could forcibly require sex from your lawful wife in the US and UK. It was considered her duty to fulfill your sexual needs. None of this I am not in the mood nonsense.

Now the feminists have taken over the courts and come up with the concept of marital rape.

[Suits]

(12-04-2013 02:43 AM)Vicious Wrote:  

Suits, what "relevant statistics"?

The ones detailing how much marital sex that average man can anticipate.

[Plutoman]

It's pretty simple to me. You find a traditional wife; one that believes in the ol' biblical verse of sex extremely often and never denying your partner. Or, you alternatively set up the arrangement of - hey, you either get sex, or you'll get it elsewhere. There's no either/or with it unless you're going to be dishonest over the deal.

That, and don't marry a slut. It's all about frame control. Have a family, if you'd like, but always hold the frame with the relationship. She's entered your world. Same goes with any sort of relationship. The only one in which you can set aside control of the frame is with the close guy friends - in which you set the terms of worlds interacting, cooperating, instead of conflicting or weird bullshit of having a dude enter your world. I've had guys try - it feels weird.

[Suits]

(12-04-2013 05:20 PM)Plutoman Wrote:  

It's pretty simple to me. You find a traditional wife; one that believes in the ol' biblical verse of sex extremely often and never denying your partner. Or, you alternatively set up the arrangement of - hey, you either get sex, or you'll get it elsewhere. There's no either/or with it unless you're going to be dishonest over the deal.

That, and don't marry a slut. It's all about frame control. Have a family, if you'd like, but always hold the frame with the relationship. She's entered your world. Same goes with any sort of relationship. The only one in which you can set aside control of the frame is with the close guy friends - in which you set the terms of worlds interacting, cooperating, instead of conflicting or weird bullshit of having a dude enter your world. I've had guys try - it feels weird.

Correct. Unfortunately, easier said than done.

[MHaes]

IDK how I feel about the issue of cheating on your wife because she isn't having sex with you anymore. Actually scratch that - I know how I feel on that. Both parties deserve to have fulfilling sex lives, and if you're wife isn't fulfilling your sex life then you should seek other options. But I am worried about the can of worms that this opens up. Wouldn't it be just as valid, then, for a wife to justify cheating on her husband because he wasn't fulfilling her sex life?

I understand one scenario is much more subjective than the other, but at the root of each scenario is dissatisfaction with your sex life.

It seems to be a bit of an ethical dilemma. I guess what I am saying is that the ethics of cheating due to a lack of sexual satisfaction in your marriage seem to say that it is morally wrong to cheat for that reason, and that the right thing to do is divorce your partner. But with how bad divorce courts are nowadays, that isn't really a feasible option either...and in that situation, I definitely see myself cheating rather than divorcing whomever I'm married to, regardless of the ethics.

Forgive my rambling, just putting my thoughts together. I'd love to hear what you guys think.

[MrXY]

Men traditionally dealt with this by having mistresses or going to prostitutes-marriage was about economics and procreation primarily-not romantic love

[Vicious]

(12-04-2013 03:38 PM)Suits Wrote:  

(12-04-2013 02:43 AM)Vicious Wrote:  

Suits, what "relevant statistics"?

The ones detailing how much marital sex that average man can anticipate.

Show, don't tell.

In addition, I don't expect a forum member here to go into this kind of union all doe-eyed. Rather he'd be managing it from the get-go.

[iknowexactly]

(12-04-2013 05:40 PM)MHaes Wrote:  

Wouldn't it be just as valid, then, for a wife to justify cheating on her husband because he wasn't fulfilling her sex life?

Definitely not equal. A cheating wife can get pregnant, or more easily bring home a disease as the receiver of fluids.

Also, women are too stupid to differentiate the value between a cad who fucks a married woman and a more honorable guy who was nice enough tot marry her declining ass.

Men and women are not equal.

[The Lizard of Oz]

There is nothing wrong with this. No sane society would conceive of the idea that marriage means you never fuck strange pussy.

A real woman wants to know that she is your #1. If she is your wife, she is the one you take seriously and you don't leave her if she holds up her part of the bargain. As long as that's the case, she will overlook your ONS with random sluts or professional whores, and will secretly respect you more for them. Affairs are a different story -- they threaten the basis of the marriage and should be avoided.

It should go without saying that the standard for the woman, as opposed to the man, is absolute physical fidelity.

This is reality; all the rest is feminist propaganda.

All of which is perfectly expressed in this great song:

Friends tell me i am crazy
And i’m wasting time with you
You’ll never be mine
It’s not the way i see it
‘cause i feel you’re already mine
Whenever you’re with me {ooh...ooh...ooh...}

People always talkin’ ‘bout
Your reputation
I don’t care about your other girls
Just be good to me {ooh...ooh...ooh...}

Friends are always tellin’ me
You’re a user
I don’t care what you do to them
Just be good to me {ooh...ooh...ooh...}

You may have many others
But i know when you’re with me
You are all mine
Friends always seem to listen
To the bad things that you do
You never do them to me {ooh...ooh...ooh...}

(12-04-2013 09:59 AM)Col. Tigh Wrote:  

(12-03-2013 11:00 PM)McQueensPlayboyRules Wrote:  

^Without derailing the thread, could you explain how you resisted the urges for strange?

Eventually I stopped resisting it, and I had sex with other women.

The aftermath was predictable. However, the marriage remained intact and, strangely enough (or not, if you understand female psychology as this forum does), my wife seems more strongly bonded to me than before. I won't deny that the resulting fights were epic and nearly collapsed the union, but I convinced my wife of the truth--that I had no intention of dissolving our marriage or leaving her and our children, and had fucked other women purely for the sex.

The other women I laid using bar and club game. I never romanced or "wined and dined" them or engaged in long phone conversations--it was just classic night game, with at most one "date" (hookah bar for drinks, then to her place for the bang) or a one night stand. Because indeed, I only wanted them for sex.