http://qr.ae/NqGMW
As usual, the comments are about how men are stupid, want stupid women to feel superior to, etc. Nobody talked about how nerdy men don't get much play on dating websites either, and for good reason - most nerds (of both sexes) have a superiority complex without deserving to and come across as arrogant when they defend their choice of playing dungeons and dragons instead of being outside.
A male nerd at least has some value in being able to earn a lot of money by working with computers or numbers. A female nerd - what value does she have if she is acne-ridden and fat, like most of them? Note that both profiles don't have photos.
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I had two profiles on eharmony at the same time; one with a nerdy-geeky-over-educated "real Marie" profile, and the other with a, er, "Marie-lite" (bimbo? can I call myself a bimbo?) profile.
Eharmony works by matching people on the basis of their answers to an extended personality test. The online system matches behind-the-scenes and sends you results of people who match you in 26 (or is it 31? can't remember) key compatability components, as well as delivering the traits and preferences you'd specifically requested (height, weight, ethnicity, smoking, religious preference, wanting kids, etc). This was in the early days of eharmony, where profiles with photos made up perhaps 50-70% of the site, but weren't yet universal; and it was common for people to not reveal their likeness until through the initial multiple-choice question-and-answer getting-to-know-you phase, post-matching, or in emails off-site. So, I had no photos up.
I'd joined eharmony through a special offer; but there was a glitch, and so my membership ended up being free for a short period of time. I was also still getting a lot of marketing emails from the company though I was already on the site. Because it would cost me nothing but time, because I was curious about whether my lukewarm success on the site was about me, about how I was marketing myself, or about the men I was matched with, and because I wanted to know more about eharmony's testing parameters, I set up a parallel profile.
I answered the same questions the same way through the personality test, and got the same results in my personality analysis. I set my geography, age range, and other preferences exactly the same for both accounts.
But on one profile, I answered the questions with short one-word or sometimes misspelled answers, (and hahas and smiley faces) and used supermarket tabloids for examples of how to answer questions requiring soul- baring. So, my favorite book was the "DaVinci Code" (now I'd do "50 Shades"- with a wink!); the "nerdy" profile had "Devil in the White City" by Erik Larson (now I'd do a "Dan" -Ariely, Pink or Kahneman - the popular and amazing psych/behavioral economics gurus); for favorite things to do I wrote: "take care of my man, cook, workout" on one profile and "read, travel, yoga, and eat" on the other; for education I limited the details to "college grad" on "Marie-lite" but referenced my multiple graduate degrees on "real-Marie".
I was matched to the same people on each profile about 50% of the time. (Some of that was no doubt due to timing of the profiles - they were about a month apart). However, of the two profiles - the "real" me and the "bimbo" me (which is still a side of me, but whatever) - 90% of the men contacted and reached out ONLY to the "bimbo" me. The others were clearly reaching out to everyone they were matched to. Of those who were matched to both profiles, not a single one reached out only to the nerdy-real me.
I don't know what to take away from that experience. It was purely anecdotal, and there were many factors that could've influenced my "results."
I had some success on the site before that; communicated with and dated a few good and wonderful men. But after that social experiment, I let both memberships lapse. I think online dating sites are worthwhile, for sure; but there's an awful lot of shallows to wade through.
However, this lesson was clear: if it seems like you're not having a lot of success in attracting people to your profile, rewrite it. Keep it simple. Most people don't care much about or for the details until after they've met you. In the same vein as any business or data presentation (see Edward Tufte), the presentation-maker should provide enough information to interest and emotionally vest the audience in the material, and then allow the audience to pursue its own line of investigation and discovery. It's all in the spin.
On the other hand, I am a Gemini, so maybe that approach is too cynical and analytical. Piña coladas and walks-in-the-rain seem to work good, too.
As usual, the comments are about how men are stupid, want stupid women to feel superior to, etc. Nobody talked about how nerdy men don't get much play on dating websites either, and for good reason - most nerds (of both sexes) have a superiority complex without deserving to and come across as arrogant when they defend their choice of playing dungeons and dragons instead of being outside.
A male nerd at least has some value in being able to earn a lot of money by working with computers or numbers. A female nerd - what value does she have if she is acne-ridden and fat, like most of them? Note that both profiles don't have photos.
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![[Image: fixed+_3f056d28937395fc2b0685a1b51f8435.jpg]](http://static.fjcdn.com/comments/fixed+_3f056d28937395fc2b0685a1b51f8435.jpg)
