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Belize
#1

Belize

This post is a quick write up from G's suggestion for the travel forum. I spent my teenage years all over Belize, so I was pretty young and this post is in no way a complete write up. But feel free to add your thoughts.


When to go: The good thing about Belize is that it's near to the US and relatively cheap to have a good time once you're there. Tourist season is around Christmas. Rainy/hurricane season is between June and November. Independence day is Sept.21, and for the whole month of September the entire country is drunk. I would recommend going around mid-September when the summer tourists are just leaving, the weather is cooler and tix are cheap..but you can have a good time year round.


How to get there: A plane ticket from San Francisco, Ca to BZE is about 400US down season and up to 800US high season. I recommend flying into Cancun for about 150/200US and catching the ADO bus to Chetumal and crossing the border which costs about 20bucks.


Places: If you don't go to the Islands rent a car. Go for all wheel drive in case you decide to take a trip into the bush.

Belize City-I'd avoid it if you can. You can find cheap herb, but be willing to go to sketch environments to get it. There are a lot of good looking Lebanese, Indian and Asian girls pent up at home just waiting for a foreigner to come swoop them, but you have to know the right people to meet them. If you do end up in the shitty city go to Princess Casino and take it from there.

San Ignacio-There are a lot of expats here, and this is a good place if you're into backcountry because most trips go out from here. There are a few good clubs but the names change every couple months. PM me if you decide to head out there. Local girls are abundant but 50% have the typical mestizo shape. Someone on the forum called it "spongebob" body.
Check out Achtun Tunichil Muknal, Xunantunich and Clarrisa Falls if you're into more a tranquilo vibe.

Mountain Pine Ridge-No girls, this is all backcountry. If you rented a 4x4 you can have a good time. There are rock pools, spelunking, ruins, zipline, tubing, hunting, dirtbiking..etc. It's a good place to take some buddies or those girls you met the day before. Watch out for banditos.

Placencia-At the time of writing they are building an international airport that takes flights from Great Britain. It's probably the fastest developing place in the country. Lots of expats and tourist girls. Lot's of good fishing, and you might find the occasional washed up kilo on the shore. It happens so often they call it "white lobster".

San Pedro-This is where most tourists go. I won't say much because you can just use google. All of the bars are in one place, and after a couple days you will know who the local pros are. I accidently swooped one from Jaguar bar thinking she was a normal girl. We went to my hotel and made out/played with her tits but she refused to fuck. I fell asleep and woke up with all my cash stolen. They will drug your drink so watch your back.
Check out Hol Chan, swim with sharks and manta rays. Get SCUBA certified for 200US. http://ambergriscaye.com/pages/town/dive.html#tour
Rent some jetskis or a boat if you have the cash so you can skip around the islands.

Caye Caulker-The more chill of the two major islands. Ask around for what is going on because it can be hit or miss. Some nights everyone is out in Pedro, and some nights it's Caye Caulker. Just follow the noise.

Notes:
-Always have a girl on you. Having a girl will get you better girls. If you are foreign this won't be hard to do.
-Be willing to bounce around in the same day and always lock down a place to sleep before you commit yourself. Go from San Ignacio to San Pedro..Pedro to Placencia. Most of the worthwhile girls will have to go somewhere else, and you'll have a better time if you can go with the flow.
-If you are a spanish speaker stress your accent so they know you aren't local, and likewise if you are black stress that you are not local. The females won't pay as much attention to you if they mistake you for a local.
-Tour guides are the most connect people, they will introduce you to people and can get you whatever you want.
-Buy everyone you meet beer and shots. People know people here and even the guy that looks like a bum probably has connections.
-If you have time try to check out Indian Creek Trail. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IJP4lBnB7kY
-If you get into trouble don't forget the power of bribes. 3 of my buddies from europe and I were locked up for 4 days over a 1/4gram of herb. It wouldn't have happened if we had "accidently" dropped some US dollars on the ground.



I left out a bunch so definitely add your experience. If anyone wants to know more just PM me.
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#2

Belize

Great write-up feomuerto. How was the overall quality and approachability of the local girls?
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#3

Belize

I have been to Belize City at least 3 times. This is one of the few places that I have been to where every girl is fugly. Maybe on the islands and the interior of the country the quality of the local talent is better but Belize City is a bust.
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#4

Belize

feomuerto,

Nice work. That is a strong Data Sheet.

I went to Caye Caulker years ago. Real beautiful, great diving and fishing. You can definitely get your "Reef G" on there.

I wouldn't go back for the girls. I saw a few beautiful ones but in general, the place with kind of limping in that department.
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#5

Belize

nice post
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#6

Belize

Belize is a pretty chill country in general. It's one of those few places that has something for everyone. I went and looked at Mayan ruins in the morning, and drank on the beach in the evening. Plus, there are a shit ton of expats living there to mingle with.
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