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Shark Week = Making fun of Masculinity
#1

Shark Week = Making fun of Masculinity

It's so kitsch and hip to watch Shark Week now.

Let's step back for a second.

Except for lions, sharks are the closest thing to perfection that exist on Earth.

Why?

Because, within their realm, they are they ultimate Alphas. And they still have normal crap to deal with.

Feminists hate Alpha males.

That's why shark week has become a big joke.

Maybe that TV show about sharks in tornados is an example of feminist shaming tactics.
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#2

Shark Week = Making fun of Masculinity

Lions are the closest thing to perfection on earth? That's a pretty big step back for a second. I'm not sure if this thread is a joke or if you were really drunk when you posted.
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#3

Shark Week = Making fun of Masculinity

I think it started with good intentions but the typical media marketing of it turned it into a joke complete with totally made up mockumentories. Discovery is like any other network and not creating these shows for goodwill but for profit..
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#4

Shark Week = Making fun of Masculinity

Quote: (08-11-2013 05:08 AM)Statsi Wrote:  

Lions are the closest thing to perfection on earth? That's a pretty big step back for a second. I'm not sure if this thread is a joke or if you were really drunk when you posted.

I don't know much about lions, but I do know that mountain lions can bound 40 feet, jump 12 foot fences, run 50 mph, move ears independently, hear wide ranges of ultrasonic sounds, and have night vision. They've got the teeth and razor-sharp claws to back them up. You would be hard-pressed to design a more formidable predator.

Beyond All Seas

"The individual has always had to struggle to keep from being overwhelmed by the tribe.
To be your own man is a hard business. If you try it, you'll be lonely often, and sometimes
frightened. But no price is too high to pay for the privilege of owning yourself." - Kipling
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#5

Shark Week = Making fun of Masculinity

Quote: (08-11-2013 08:27 AM)Beyond Borders Wrote:  

Quote: (08-11-2013 05:08 AM)Statsi Wrote:  

Lions are the closest thing to perfection on earth? That's a pretty big step back for a second. I'm not sure if this thread is a joke or if you were really drunk when you posted.

I don't know much about lions, but I do know that mountain lions can bound 40 feet, jump 12 foot fences, run 50 mph, move ears independently, hear wide ranges of ultrasonic sounds, and have night vision. They've got the teeth and razor-sharp claws to back them up. You would be hard-pressed to design a more formidable predator.

also lionesses do all the hunting, the males eat first and their only job is protecting the pride and creating offspring while lounging around all day, it would be hard pressed to get a better life than that.
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#6

Shark Week = Making fun of Masculinity

For land, lion gets my vote for apex predator. I'm a bit biased of course [Image: smile.gif]

For sea, Orca is on top. They actually attack/prey on great whites.

I don't hit on girls much, but when i do they melt.

<html><img src="http://cdn.memegenerator.co/instances/600x/40185258.jpg" /></html>
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#7

Shark Week = Making fun of Masculinity

a life where you weren't a dumb animal maybe?
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#8

Shark Week = Making fun of Masculinity

I think it can be argued that the two are the top apex predators in the natural world. To me, they do represent a kind of perfection, or the closest thing to perfect that we have in many ways.

Of course the natural world needs all the different levels of animals, but the attitude of a lion is probably the most "alpha" in the way that we understand it.

It's similar with sharks. I think that everyone is making fun of these creatures and that it does have some cultural relevance. These animals are symbols of power in the same way that the alpha male is. Maybe it's a stretch to relate them, but in my experience, women relate a lot of unconnected things based on feeling (that's why attraction is transferable).

Our culture makes fun of death. It doesn't take it seriously.

On the whole, death used to be this profound aspect of life. Now, it's a joke and everyone promotes YOLO.

When people have their egos buttressed and their defenses down, it's easier for corporations to sell products this way.

There definitely is a time and place for making light of things to get through life, but our culture is completely dominated by the meme that everyone has to feel great all the time.

To me, the current hipstery/ironic obsession with sharks reflects a belief system that says that nothing really matters because we are going to die anyway.

I think life is the opposite. You are going to die, so you have to go out and have the best life possible.
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#9

Shark Week = Making fun of Masculinity

dont forget about the honey badger

God'll prolly have me on some real strict shit
No sleeping all day, no getting my dick licked

The Original Emotional Alpha
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#10

Shark Week = Making fun of Masculinity

In the future feminists will create there own robotic predators to live in the wild and eat sharks and lions. It's being beta tested now. It's basically a giant sized Lindy West with a dorsal fin.
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#11

Shark Week = Making fun of Masculinity

Quote: (08-11-2013 09:21 AM)pheonix500000 Wrote:  

Quote: (08-11-2013 08:27 AM)Beyond Borders Wrote:  

Quote: (08-11-2013 05:08 AM)Statsi Wrote:  

Lions are the closest thing to perfection on earth? That's a pretty big step back for a second. I'm not sure if this thread is a joke or if you were really drunk when you posted.

I don't know much about lions, but I do know that mountain lions can bound 40 feet, jump 12 foot fences, run 50 mph, move ears independently, hear wide ranges of ultrasonic sounds, and have night vision. They've got the teeth and razor-sharp claws to back them up. You would be hard-pressed to design a more formidable predator.

also lionesses do all the hunting, the males eat first and their only job is protecting the pride and creating offspring while lounging around all day, it would be hard pressed to get a better life than that.

A few copies back, National Geographic had an article about the vicious short sweet life of male lions. You could reign supremely for a while with all the lioness pussy you can have in your harem until you're brutally usurped by Simba and his four brothers then have all your progeny eliminated. Then because the lionesses no longer have cubs to tend to they go into estrus accepting the seed of your usurpers willingly.
Besides looking out for rivals, males have to maintain a strict alpha frame. Show any betaness and the lionesses will turn on his ass in an instant. Males will also kill females willing to mate with them probably failed the lion boner test.

"I have refused to wear a condom all of my life, for a simple reason – if I’m going to masturbate into a balloon why would I need a woman?"
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#12

Shark Week = Making fun of Masculinity

Quote: (08-11-2013 11:36 AM)Kingsley Davis Wrote:  

Quote: (08-11-2013 09:21 AM)pheonix500000 Wrote:  

Quote: (08-11-2013 08:27 AM)Beyond Borders Wrote:  

Quote: (08-11-2013 05:08 AM)Statsi Wrote:  

Lions are the closest thing to perfection on earth? That's a pretty big step back for a second. I'm not sure if this thread is a joke or if you were really drunk when you posted.

I don't know much about lions, but I do know that mountain lions can bound 40 feet, jump 12 foot fences, run 50 mph, move ears independently, hear wide ranges of ultrasonic sounds, and have night vision. They've got the teeth and razor-sharp claws to back them up. You would be hard-pressed to design a more formidable predator.

also lionesses do all the hunting, the males eat first and their only job is protecting the pride and creating offspring while lounging around all day, it would be hard pressed to get a better life than that.

A few copies back, National Geographic had an article about the vicious short sweet life of male lions. You could reign supremely for a while with all the lioness pussy you can have in your harem until you're brutally usurped by Simba and his four brothers then have all your progeny eliminated. Then because the lionesses no longer have cubs to tend to they go into estrus accepting the seed of your usurpers willingly.
Besides looking out for rivals, males have to maintain a strict alpha frame. Show any betaness and the lionesses will turn on his ass in an instant. Males will also kill females willing to mate with them probably failed the lion boner test.

Live by the sword, die by the sword. Better to live as an alpha lion fighting to the death than as a beta living on your knees (in fear). Something like that. Some lions reign short, some reign long.

I don't hit on girls much, but when i do they melt.

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#13

Shark Week = Making fun of Masculinity

Quote: (08-11-2013 12:37 PM)Leo Wrote:  

Quote: (08-11-2013 11:36 AM)Kingsley Davis Wrote:  

Quote: (08-11-2013 09:21 AM)pheonix500000 Wrote:  

Quote: (08-11-2013 08:27 AM)Beyond Borders Wrote:  

Quote: (08-11-2013 05:08 AM)Statsi Wrote:  

Lions are the closest thing to perfection on earth? That's a pretty big step back for a second. I'm not sure if this thread is a joke or if you were really drunk when you posted.

I don't know much about lions, but I do know that mountain lions can bound 40 feet, jump 12 foot fences, run 50 mph, move ears independently, hear wide ranges of ultrasonic sounds, and have night vision. They've got the teeth and razor-sharp claws to back them up. You would be hard-pressed to design a more formidable predator.

also lionesses do all the hunting, the males eat first and their only job is protecting the pride and creating offspring while lounging around all day, it would be hard pressed to get a better life than that.

A few copies back, National Geographic had an article about the vicious short sweet life of male lions. You could reign supremely for a while with all the lioness pussy you can have in your harem until you're brutally usurped by Simba and his four brothers then have all your progeny eliminated. Then because the lionesses no longer have cubs to tend to they go into estrus accepting the seed of your usurpers willingly.
Besides looking out for rivals, males have to maintain a strict alpha frame. Show any betaness and the lionesses will turn on his ass in an instant. Males will also kill females willing to mate with them probably failed the lion boner test.

Live by the sword, die by the sword. Better to live as an alpha lion fighting to the death than as a beta living on your knees (in fear). Something like that. Some lions reign short, some reign long.

exactly, as i always tell myself when im with a girl who has a boyfriend or husband, someday someguy would track me down, kill me and chop up my body into little pieces but today is not that day so enjoy life.
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#14

Shark Week = Making fun of Masculinity

Quote: (08-11-2013 08:17 AM)puckman Wrote:  

I think it started with good intentions but the typical media marketing of it turned it into a joke complete with totally made up mockumentories. Discovery is like any other network and not creating these shows for goodwill but for profit..

Unlike hapless male humans, male lions have zero tolerance for the spawn of other males, so they got that going for them.

Quote:Quote:

Similar behavior is also seen in male lions, among other species, who also kill young cubs, thereby enabling them to impregnate the females. Unlike langurs, male lions live in small groups, which cooperate to take control of a pride from an existing group.[6] They will attempt to kill any cubs that are roughly nine months old or younger, though as in other species, the female will attempt to defend her cubs viciously. Males have, on average, only a two-year window in which to pass on their genes, and lionesses only give birth once every two years, so the selective pressure on them to conform to this behavior is strong. In fact it is estimated that a quarter of cubs dying in the first year of life are victims of infanticide.

#NoSingleMoms
#NoHymenNoDiamond
#DontWantDaughters
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#15

Shark Week = Making fun of Masculinity

While male lions don't do much hunting, that's because it's beneath them.

Something like 20% of the male lions actually have prides. The other 80% live in the wild on their own. They hunt for themselves and look for a pride to conquer.

Thus a male lion in a pride actually has a ton of work to do that goes far beyond "lazing about and getting fed all day." They must constantly watch for attacks from stray lions, or rival lion prides, or hyenas. Lions are the warriors of the pride and the reason why female lionesses only take the strongest lions to rule over them is to protect them from these threats.

I watched an awesome documentary called "Lions vs. Hyenas," and basically lions were fighting wars against hyenas and other lions several times every month. It's a brutal life.

As far as I can tell, the whole "Lions do nothing while the females do all the work," is just more male shaming propaganda from feminists and bitter women that is placed on the natural world.

Contributor at Return of Kings.  I got banned from twatter, which is run by little bitches and weaklings. You can follow me on Gab.

Be sure to check out the easiest mining program around, FreedomXMR.
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#16

Shark Week = Making fun of Masculinity

Stealing from lions:




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#17

Shark Week = Making fun of Masculinity

Quote: (08-11-2013 02:07 PM)Samseau Wrote:  

As far as I can tell, the whole "Lions do nothing while the females do all the work," is just more male shaming propaganda from feminists and bitter women that is placed on the natural world.

Well, if feminists think lions are chauvinistic macho patriarchs, perhaps they could then mate with castrated kittens.

Oh wait, they are doing just that.
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#18

Shark Week = Making fun of Masculinity

Quote: (08-11-2013 10:47 AM)soup Wrote:  

I think it can be argued that the two are the top apex predators in the natural world.

The human alpha male is the top apex predator in the natural world. Since the human female preys on him, the human female is the top apex predator in the "civilized" world.
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#19

Shark Week = Making fun of Masculinity

Fuck a Shark.

Crocodiles are the top bosses.

As far as the male goes they are probably the most territorial creatures on land/water and will fuck anybody up who tries to step to them. They still have to hunt and fight, as the male lion gets to skip on that a lot. From a young age they are forced to fight for their space or else be stuck in shitty parts of the water where there is crappy sources of food. He rolls solo and only lets females come into his frame.

Plus they will fuck you up, here is what Big Croc has to say about your Apex shark:

[Image: croc-vs-shark.jpg]

Here is Big Croc and your Apex Tiger:
[Image: 2744_deadly-summer-1_04700300.jpg]

Here is the king of the jungle getting taught not to fuck around:
[Image: Johan-Opperman-Kruger-crocodile-attacks-...b-2013.jpg]

Crocodiles don't fuck around; I am sure El Mech has stories from Florida of them. My cousin when he was on mission during the Ivory Coast war said he was most scared of the crocs, he didn't give a fuck about any soldiers dudes trying to hack him up did not make him sweat, it was the crocs at night that tried to fuck him up the most.

"They are devil animals, they love blood and to kill for fun"
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#20

Shark Week = Making fun of Masculinity

You guys are sleeping on Giant Otters




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#21

Shark Week = Making fun of Masculinity

Quote: (08-11-2013 04:52 PM)kosko Wrote:  

Fuck a Shark.

Crocodiles are the top bosses.

If we're being completely accurate here, then technically hippos are top bosses. They're responsible for more human deaths in Africa than any other animal. They have no natural predator. Their sweat is red. They're incredibly resilient to sickness and disease. Their skin is up to 2" thick with a layer of fat that's even thicker. They can open their mouths up to 150 degrees.

Yeah, okay, this is terrifying and all, definitely don't want to be in this situation:
[Image: images?q=tbn:ANd9GcTaF5YURgnc2G2rBcUMAuG...fzLRH__BUw]

But look at this prehistoric shit; this looks like something Hollywood would come up with. Last thing you want to be face-to-face with:
[Image: images?q=tbn:ANd9GcRdMETDYDIw-ZNhWRPYRAw...IwFY9J9i4G]
[Image: images?q=tbn:ANd9GcQtqcdpCetn6cmYiMN4SJD...6xjzhJNAeA]

"...so I gave her an STD, and she STILL wanted to bang me."

TEAM NO APPS

TEAM PINK
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#22

Shark Week = Making fun of Masculinity

Quote: (08-11-2013 06:55 PM)thedude3737 Wrote:  

If we're being completely accurate here, then technically hippos are top bosses. They're responsible for more human deaths in Africa than any other animal. They have no natural predator. Their sweat is red. They're incredibly resilient to sickness and disease. Their skin is up to 2" thick with a layer of fat that's even thicker. They can open their mouths up to 150 degrees.

The ultimate alpha... All he needs is a biker vest. [Image: biggrin.gif]

[Image: 1967_hippopotamus.jpg]

Beyond All Seas

"The individual has always had to struggle to keep from being overwhelmed by the tribe.
To be your own man is a hard business. If you try it, you'll be lonely often, and sometimes
frightened. But no price is too high to pay for the privilege of owning yourself." - Kipling
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#23

Shark Week = Making fun of Masculinity

Only on RVF will you find Animal Data Sheets.

Nope.
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#24

Shark Week = Making fun of Masculinity

Quote: (08-11-2013 04:33 PM)Wadsworth Wrote:  

Quote: (08-11-2013 10:47 AM)soup Wrote:  

I think it can be argued that the two are the top apex predators in the natural world.

The human alpha male is the top apex predator in the natural world. Since the human female preys on him, the human female is the top apex predator in the "civilized" world.

haha, now isn't that a predicament. One could argue which gender is actually the civilized one. you may have this reversed.
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#25

Shark Week = Making fun of Masculinity

Lions aren't fucking with tigers.

Tigers are not only bigger and stronger, they are the far superior hunters. Bears make up a natural part of their diet and they've even been known to imitate the mating calls of certain deer. Their natural habitat ranges from the heat of southern Asia to the snow of Far East Russia and they love the water.

Quote:Quote:

Owner of the Londolozi Reserve in South Africa John Varty said, "People always ask me which one is bigger? If a tiger and a lion had a fight, which one would win? Well, I've seen tigers crunch up a full-grown leopard tortoise like it was nothing. And lions try, but they just don't get it right. If there's a fight, the tiger will win, every time."

Quote:Quote:

The animal rescue organisation Big Cat Rescue of Tampa, Florida answered, "While we would much prefer that people focus their thoughts on saving these magnificent animals than on who would win if a lion and tiger fight, the power of these two largest cats seems to raise this question in people's minds. While it would depend on the size, age and aggressiveness of the specific animals involved, generally tigers have a significant advantage."

Quote:Quote:

The conservation charity Save China's Tigers stated, "Recent research indicates that the tiger is indeed stronger than the lion in terms of physical strength. Lions hunt in prides, so it would be in a group and the tigers as a solitary creature so it would be on its own. A tiger is generally physically larger than a lion. Most Experts would favour a Siberian and Bengal tiger over an African lion."

[Image: hl_eye-of-the-tiger-com_sumatrantiger_wilhelmazoo.jpg]
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