[Enigma]

So I met this chick online. Texted her back and forth a few times, got her over to my house to watch a movie one night. Talked, had some wine, we fucked. Some of Roosh's LMR advice from Bang and his condom "just in case" line were very helpful here (though I eventually went raw ). Also, used the "I don't put out on the first date" line that I believe I read about here which was comically effective (Her after sex "I won"...you're right, you beat me ). I did not cum because I don't drink much anymore and even a couple drinks makes it pretty much impossible, she was left shaking and staring at the ceiling. She was actually decent in bed but started out really bossy and really liked being on top which I found odd but I eventually just told her to shut up and pinned her down while I railed the shit out of her until she said she likes me being on top better lol.

Anyways, she's adorable so I let her lay on top of me for a while after sex and talk about herself and how hot I am. I text her two days later, she legitimately has a lot going on during the week so we aren't able to hang out but she is initiating texting often for the next few days. I entertain it to a degree but still let conversations die fairly quick. One night she asks if I want to ride with her to the book store because she has to pass my house, I agree on the condition that we hit up a drive-thru to get myself some grub.

Knock that out really quick but when we get to my place she refuses to kiss me. Just keeps her lips tight.

Her: "Can't we just hang out?"
Me: something like "let's just kiss", can't recall exactly
Her: "I am tired from work and working out blah blah"

I go completely cold, grab the rest of my food and move to the other couch, turn on the TV, eat my food and then lay down facing away from her. Won't really engage her in conversation. She asks how my "online flirting" is going, I respond "It's going really great, you?" (Note: After sex she mentioned something about me "going to check my messages as soon as she leaves") She says she is probably going to delete it and only uses it for entertainment now, is telling me "tips" for "[my] flirting", and insists that I look at a few messages and guy's profiles as she clowns them. I eventually say I need to go to bed, she gives me a long hug and leaves.

Texts me to let me know she's home and calls me "her cute little [pet name]". I ignore this. She texts me the next evening to ask my plans for the night (Friday). Continued radio silence on my end. Didn't hear from her today, we'll see what happens.

Just looking for help interpreting her intentions and whether there was a better way I could've handled it. From my perspective, I see her withholding affection as an attempt to undue any perception of "sluttiness" I may have from her putting out early and the online thing as her way of showing me she has options. Not necessarily a bad thing but the way she went about it really aggravated me and some of her other actions made me believe this may be a pattern with her so I cut her off.

I definitely wasn't looking for a relationship with this chick, I've actually fucked multiple girls since our "first date" but I like having a sweet, cute chick in the rotation who I can be a little more intimate with and do stuff with to balance out this nympho that sends me videos of her fingering her asshole throughout the day and the other random pieces I'm working right now.

[polymath]

Damn you froze her out pretty hard. I get the vibe that you just want to bang and she wants to have some kind of relationship where she holds the reins. A girl who refuses to kiss kinda sucks though, no matter how sweet she might be.

[kinjutsu]

You did the best you could've done in that situation.
By holding frame you didn't give a girl you barely know anything. You dont want a relationship and you aren't leading her on about it either...

Whenever i find myself in this situation i just simply cut the interaction short.
The moment i knew she for sure wasn't into kissing and wasn't playing hard to get i would've kicked her out.
"Hey I'm kicking you out now. I just realized i have a really early start in the morning."

Never let a girl be around unless she's with the program. Whether it's straight up sex, fwb, study group for school or your ltr/wife. Ask her to leave or you go home.

[Enigma]

(01-27-2013 02:05 PM)kinjutsu Wrote:  

You did the best you could've done in that situation.
By holding frame you didn't give a girl you barely know anything. You dont want a relationship and you aren't leading her on about it either...

Whenever i find myself in this situation i just simply cut the interaction short.
The moment i knew she for sure wasn't into kissing and wasn't playing hard to get i would've kicked her out.
"Hey I'm kicking you out now. I just realized i have a really early start in the morning."

Never let a girl be around unless she's with the program. Whether it's straight up sex, fwb, study group for school or your ltr/wife. Ask her to leave or you go home.

Maybe kicking her out would've done the trick. I don't have any problem cutting most girls off but there are others who's company I enjoy enough that I wonder if there could have been a way to correct her behavior and salvage the situation. It always seems like a waste to just drop a chick that's very into you because of something so petty on their part but that's probably just red pill indigestion.

[bojangles]

i thought you did well here apart from what kinjistu said, but if you want her in rotation then completely freezing her out is not going to help. Respond to 1 in 3 or 2 in 3 messages with simple straight to the point im in charge texts and see what happens.

[funkyzeit]

You did good, but I am not sure about that "I went cold" part.

Suddenly becoming angry passive-aggressive is a major turn off and may seem needy. You should have just brush it off, keep your good mood, but not initiate conversation.

Becoming frustrated and silent = Needy insecure guy who needs girl to be happy and have fun. It only works if she gets the feeling that she wasted your precious alpha time.

Distancing yourself from something that "isn't fun" and having fun without it = Alpha frame, never fails.

[Enigma]

(01-28-2013 07:54 AM)bojangles Wrote:  

i thought you did well here apart from what kinjistu said, but if you want her in rotation then completely freezing her out is not going to help. Respond to 1 in 3 or 2 in 3 messages with simple straight to the point im in charge texts and see what happens.

Thanks for the advice. I'm thinking it's pretty unlikely that she texts me again at this point but we'll see. Looking back, I probably could have responded to the second text an hour or two later with something short and simple conveying that I already have plans.

(01-28-2013 08:30 AM)funkyzeit Wrote:  

You did good, but I am not sure about that "I went cold" part.

Suddenly becoming angry passive-aggressive is a major turn off and may seem needy. You should have just brush it off, keep your good mood, but not initiate conversation.

Becoming frustrated and silent = Needy insecure guy who needs girl to be happy and have fun. It only works if she gets the feeling that she wasted your precious alpha time.

Distancing yourself from something that "isn't fun" and having fun without it = Alpha frame, never fails.

Good point but I'm naturally very mellow much of the time so it's not like I went from having this fun, animated conversation to sulking alone on the other couch. I don't watch much TV but there are a few comedy shows I follow so I was having a good laugh and winding down before bed. My energy level didn't change much, I simply switched focus from a boring, casual conversation with her to the TV. I still responded when she addressed me directly but made no attempt to engage her and withdrew myself physically.

I do think kicking her out could have been a better option though. May have gotten my point across more directly.

[Enigma]

So I'll update this one for you fellas. She didn't text again so I reinitiated about a week after ignoring her. She answered me immediately, I eventually pulled an "oh you never text me" She explained that she did and when I didn't answer she assumed it was a pump and dump, also confirmed that she was testing me with the not kissing thing. I admitted that "games" like that annoyed me but claimed I never received the text She didn't fully accept this excuse but she was over the next night and fucked with no resistance. Gave me one hell of a blow job and rode the shit out of my cock. Cut most of the bullshit. She annoyed me a few days later so I cut her from the roster.