[speakeasy]

When you open up a set of girls, where do you usually put your energy level?

Do you go in calm, with a relaxed tone and pace of conversation, or do you go in "guns blazing", amped up with a lot of energy giving a life-of-the-party presence?

Do you read the girl's energy level and match yours to her's to elicit rapport? Or would it be better to go in with a level that's higher than her's to DHV?

[thegmanifesto]

Speakeasy,

Excellent questions with no easy answer.

When I was younger, I would go in heavy with a "life-of-the-party presence" to great effect. Great if you have a crew.

Now, I usually roll dolo so I go in with a smoother vibe. Which works as well.

There are so many variables here: your mood, the girls mood, the atmosphere etc.

This is one of the interesting things about Game, contrary to what many PUA's say, it is not science.

Its Art.

- MPM

[thegmanifesto]

As far as "Do you read the girl's energy level and match yours to her's to elicit rapport? Or would it be better to go in with a level that's higher than her's to DHV?"

I think a good rule of thumb is to go in at a higher level than the girls you are talking too.

Unless of course they are at a "bonkers" level, and you might want to tone them down.

[Basil Ransom]

If she thinks you're cool, high energy will make her think, "wow, what a cool guy." If not, she'll think you're a huge, try-hard weirdo. And possibly a faggot. A lot of community guys fall into the latter category.

Being high energy isn't necessary. It can be a liability - you never want to seem excited to talk to girls.

Personally, I feel weird being high energy, at least when I'm not drunk. Being high energy and warm to a girl who probably will never say hello to you again amounts to disrespecting yourself. And it's kind of emasculating.

You'll eventually settle on the same energy level over and over, and that will probably work best for you. It'll vary by venue, but you won't be thinking about it every time.

Some guys can pull off the "center of the party" thing. I have done it many times, especially when the people around me were less cool, but it's not consistent. I've got a friend who does, and he's always got girls talking to him, and has a very silly sense of humor/conversation. But it's not something that can be aped easily. And you might become the lovable guy that they'd never f*ck.

I find it more fruitful to talk to smaller groups, with less energy.

[elguapo]

Same or slightly higher level.

Of course depends on the ambiance, party, etc.

[Kona]

(11-04-2009 03:49 PM)thegmanifesto Wrote:  

I go in with a smoother vibe. Which works as well.

That's how I've been doing it now that I'm getting older.

Maybe a little unrelated but I used an opener yesterday that got me laid. I'm gonna do this more often.

I saw two girls and 1 guy sitting at a table at my happy hour spot. I figured one of the girls was the dude's but couldn't figure out which one. I walked up and did the "hey don't I know you" crap to the guy. Once it was established I'd mistaken him for someone else, I had already told all 3 of them about how damn cool I am. I was the center of attention in that little group. Then he introduced one of the girls to me as his girlfriend. I then applied The Greatest Pick Up Line of All Time and took the non-girlfriend (who was way better looking) outside to burn. When we got back the other two wanted to leave and my little blond surfer wanted to stay. It was too easy.

Aloha!

[kerouac]

Man, this is a tough question.

I keep writing one thing, deleting it, try writing another, and deleting that too.

It's tough because it depends. It depends on the crowd and the vibe. I wish there was a definitive answer, for me at least, but I can't come to a direct answer.

Some nights I'm going nuts, high energy, around a party and making out with different girls, and other nights when I'm very mellow and go for a slower approach.

I'll say this, when it comes to approach, matching the ambiance works best. If it's a party where they're playing electronic, you have to go higher energy. If you're really chill at a electronic party, it's going to be kind of creepy. Vice versa for an R&B/Slower-tempo party. As Basil pointed out, going Hi-NRG at a slower venue makes you come off faggy (no offense to my gay friends who are most likely not on this).

If you're somewhere where there is no music, then you go with whatever makes you feel good.

Come to think of it, the times I am most successful (definitely not now since I am preparing for a super-logical test that makes my brain pretty damn incompatible with pickup) is when I live in my bubble of happiness and I pull a girl into my good feel. Does that make any sense?

[Riker]

Kerouac that makes perfect sense! When I'm happy and can just bring someone else into the same state it just has so much value.