[Benoit]

(12-24-2013 07:54 AM)Beyond Borders Wrote:  

On top of all that, I don't know how many of you actually know someone who lost a spouse, but a lot of widows and widowers struggle with guilt when they try to move on (whether it's logical or not). This woman has made it much easier on them by helping to relieve those types of doubts and give "permission" and her blessing. Maybe it's a bit overkill for some but I can see why she did it.

This is the type of thing an old-fashioned woman who really cares for her husband and family - as opposed to the modern model of woman so many of us complain about - might do if she's dying and I fully support it.

An old-fashioned woman who really cares for her husband and family would have told them privately to their faces before she died - not put it out there via a method almost guaranteed to get headlines all around the world.

I don't hold it against the woman specifically, but it is incredibly manipulative - "wait until he's ready to move on with his life then make sure everyone knows he's banging someone else and having them around MY kids. And I've only been dead [x] years!"

This is not a recipe for reducing guilt, it's a sure-fire way to put the new relationship under the microscope and remind everyone that she was there first.