great thread so far. excellent advice by all, especially on the bouncing, on the push pulling sexually, and on the freeze out.
however, only XXL's reply talks about something that is HUGE for girls: comfort. trust. an emotional connection.
in a very real sense, LMR is a girl in a struggle with herself. part of her is horny and wanting your dick, but the other part is concerned, not only about the social implications of fucking a new man, but also about the emotional and even physical concerns about fucking a new man. the more of an emotional connection you can create with a girl, the more you will be able to make her feel like you are someone she *should* be sexually intimate with.
i really liked XXL's post which he called "My Fastest Road To Intimacy", and which i called in my own head "be the crocodile". an excerpt:
dude, after reading that, *i* feel closer to XXL, i feel like he is someone i want to help, someone i want to share things with, etc etc. no homo but see how it works? sharing, being vulnerable, being open, being raw and naked -- that is the kind of emotional chick crack girls absolutely love.
of course, you can never lose your alpha frame. you can never whine, or complain, or talk about problems that you have not overcome, or things that make you look weak in the present. that's why talking about your childhood is so money, because children are weak by nature, and we've all been there.
i mean, this line is so good "my grandpa was my best friend who understood me", jesus, now **this** is the kind of stuff that melts girls hearts. combined, of course, with strong alpha eye contact, strong alpha posture and body language, a great outfit, great haircut, smooth styling, confidence, etc etc etc.
a girl is looking for a strong man with a kind heart -- a kind heart, for *her* and for his family and loved ones. not a bleeding heart loser who has a heart that is *too* kind and who thus is a pushover to anybody. mystery talked a lot about being the "protector of loved ones", and he's right. that kind of thing melts girls hearts.
so anyway, point of all this, great advice all around, just don't forget about the emotional connection. it's crucial.
that reminds me, badger has a great post about emotional connections, and questions to ask to get there:
http://badgerhut.wordpress.com/2012/03/2...onnection/
and finally, this isn't anything new. it's all in the mystery method. the M3 model has three phases:
1. attraction
2. comfort
3. seduction
i actually would relabel it:
1. attraction
2. emotional connection
3. seduction
comfort to me sounds too much like "comfortable", as in making sure she is comfortable, relaxed, not scared, having a good time.
no.
when mystery says comfort, he really means "a deep emotional connection", also called snowflaking, like the two of you are really connecting in this deep, emotional, almost spiritual way, almost like destiny, like you were bound to meet, like she is the *real special* girl that you have been looking for, and you are the *real special* man that she has been looking for.
of course, that's a tricky path, because most newbies to game are recovering betas with oneitis and pedestalization issues -- i STILL have tons of pedestalization issues -- so it is slightly dangerous to go for too much of a real emotional connection with her, because watch out, you don't want to pedestalize her for real! -- so yeah, it's tricky, but that doesn't mean you should work at developing this "emotional muscle" and this system of enchanting a girl and making her fall for you.
good luck man. you are doing great. having one girl and getting pussy on the side, hell yeah!
however, only XXL's reply talks about something that is HUGE for girls: comfort. trust. an emotional connection.
in a very real sense, LMR is a girl in a struggle with herself. part of her is horny and wanting your dick, but the other part is concerned, not only about the social implications of fucking a new man, but also about the emotional and even physical concerns about fucking a new man. the more of an emotional connection you can create with a girl, the more you will be able to make her feel like you are someone she *should* be sexually intimate with.
i really liked XXL's post which he called "My Fastest Road To Intimacy", and which i called in my own head "be the crocodile". an excerpt:
Quote:Quote:
THE DEEP SHIT..anything that conveys comfort, trust, security, vulnerability and emotional connection. what i do is i open myself up to her. i share stories from my life (bad and good).. how my broken home childhood affected me.. how hard it is to me to trust people.. how i can't find myself.. how i feel introverted and extroverted back and forth which makes me crazy.. how my grandpa was my best friend who understood me..
dude, after reading that, *i* feel closer to XXL, i feel like he is someone i want to help, someone i want to share things with, etc etc. no homo but see how it works? sharing, being vulnerable, being open, being raw and naked -- that is the kind of emotional chick crack girls absolutely love.
of course, you can never lose your alpha frame. you can never whine, or complain, or talk about problems that you have not overcome, or things that make you look weak in the present. that's why talking about your childhood is so money, because children are weak by nature, and we've all been there.
i mean, this line is so good "my grandpa was my best friend who understood me", jesus, now **this** is the kind of stuff that melts girls hearts. combined, of course, with strong alpha eye contact, strong alpha posture and body language, a great outfit, great haircut, smooth styling, confidence, etc etc etc.
a girl is looking for a strong man with a kind heart -- a kind heart, for *her* and for his family and loved ones. not a bleeding heart loser who has a heart that is *too* kind and who thus is a pushover to anybody. mystery talked a lot about being the "protector of loved ones", and he's right. that kind of thing melts girls hearts.
so anyway, point of all this, great advice all around, just don't forget about the emotional connection. it's crucial.
that reminds me, badger has a great post about emotional connections, and questions to ask to get there:
http://badgerhut.wordpress.com/2012/03/2...onnection/
and finally, this isn't anything new. it's all in the mystery method. the M3 model has three phases:
1. attraction
2. comfort
3. seduction
i actually would relabel it:
1. attraction
2. emotional connection
3. seduction
comfort to me sounds too much like "comfortable", as in making sure she is comfortable, relaxed, not scared, having a good time.
no.
when mystery says comfort, he really means "a deep emotional connection", also called snowflaking, like the two of you are really connecting in this deep, emotional, almost spiritual way, almost like destiny, like you were bound to meet, like she is the *real special* girl that you have been looking for, and you are the *real special* man that she has been looking for.
of course, that's a tricky path, because most newbies to game are recovering betas with oneitis and pedestalization issues -- i STILL have tons of pedestalization issues -- so it is slightly dangerous to go for too much of a real emotional connection with her, because watch out, you don't want to pedestalize her for real! -- so yeah, it's tricky, but that doesn't mean you should work at developing this "emotional muscle" and this system of enchanting a girl and making her fall for you.
good luck man. you are doing great. having one girl and getting pussy on the side, hell yeah!