[MrXY]

OP, you are conceptualizing the issue in too much of a black/white manner- that a man has to be either overly sensitive or have no feelings at all regarding girls.

The correct method is simply to make yourself less sensitive to anxiety and rejection because being overly sensitive will lead to a failure to act, improper responses. and emotional turmoil. In a previous life, if a girl rejected me, it would not only ruin my day, it would ruin my week and maybe my month. I rarely approached girls because the pain of rejection was too unpleasant.

Now, through improving my Inner Game and lots of practice of approaching and dating, my emotional state no longer cockblocks me. I'm not a robot- if I get blown out on an approach or a girl flakes or won't give me a second date, it bothers me for maybe five minutes, then I'm ready to move on. And the sting is a lot less, more like a gnat bite, a minor annoyance, not a threat to my self esteem. I can think of two instances in the last few months when I had an unsuccessful date with a girl and immediately went to a bar, picked up and girl, and banged her that night.

Another solution to managing your emotions is dealing with what the Buddhists call "attachment." The ordinary person feels that they ARE their emotions, become fully invested in them, and allow their emotions to control them. But you aren't your emotions-emotions are transitory states and you have the power to either identify with them or to regard them as just a passing creation of your mind. The next time you're feeling nervous before an approach or a little upset after a rejection, remember that these feelings are your mind reacting to a certain stimulus and just let it pass without clinging to it.