How do you blabber endlessly to keep a girl attentive and avoid "awkward silences"?
08-17-2017, 11:59 AM
Women are fixated with the social sphere. Gossip really doesn't describe the totality of what it is. It's a fascination they have with the web of relationships and how they all influence each other.
If they have a friend, they'll tell you everything about what's going on with that friend's life. Same deal with coworkers and relatives. Celebrity gossip or the unfolding plotline in a show like Game of Thrones is an extension of that impulse, treating people you don't really know or don't really exist as if they're part of the larger tribe.
Interwoven in all this is judgment. Is this person or that person doing the right thing? Did this person or that person disrespect or insult someone else? Drama to women is all about maintaining a black book of grievances about people.
If you spend enough time listening to it...it will all start to come across like whining about tempests in a teapot. This person did X to Y and isn't that terrible. Since this is all talking about people behind their back, it doesn't feel very productive. If she's got a problem with a person, she should confront them directly, but women don't do this. They mull this stuff over and try to find ways to respond indirectly. The takeaway is that how they manage their social life with others is the same way she'll manage her relationship with YOU too. So you can think you're being her confidant and all but odds are she's talking dirt about you behind your back to the same friends she's bashing when she talks to you.
What seems like petty soap opera is the center of women's existence. Their standing in the social pecking order means everything to them. This is true even for supermodels, who just start fixating on competition with other supermodels.
I've yet to meet a woman who was above the fray on this stuff. When I went out with a doctor who was probably making well over $200K a year she would whine about her coworkers.
Women just fixate more on the interpersonal sphere and it comes across as petty, whiney, and insecure to men.
The downside of being socially wired is you start to shift focus away from yourself and onto others. If you find yourself spending more time thinking about what's going on with other people you can begin to lose your grip on yourself and your own goals in life. To some people it acts like an escape, either to live vicariously or (National Enquirer style) feel a sense of comfort that some other people's lives are more miserable.
There's a term, "tend your own garden". It's something few women are able to do.
If they have a friend, they'll tell you everything about what's going on with that friend's life. Same deal with coworkers and relatives. Celebrity gossip or the unfolding plotline in a show like Game of Thrones is an extension of that impulse, treating people you don't really know or don't really exist as if they're part of the larger tribe.
Interwoven in all this is judgment. Is this person or that person doing the right thing? Did this person or that person disrespect or insult someone else? Drama to women is all about maintaining a black book of grievances about people.
If you spend enough time listening to it...it will all start to come across like whining about tempests in a teapot. This person did X to Y and isn't that terrible. Since this is all talking about people behind their back, it doesn't feel very productive. If she's got a problem with a person, she should confront them directly, but women don't do this. They mull this stuff over and try to find ways to respond indirectly. The takeaway is that how they manage their social life with others is the same way she'll manage her relationship with YOU too. So you can think you're being her confidant and all but odds are she's talking dirt about you behind your back to the same friends she's bashing when she talks to you.
What seems like petty soap opera is the center of women's existence. Their standing in the social pecking order means everything to them. This is true even for supermodels, who just start fixating on competition with other supermodels.
I've yet to meet a woman who was above the fray on this stuff. When I went out with a doctor who was probably making well over $200K a year she would whine about her coworkers.
Women just fixate more on the interpersonal sphere and it comes across as petty, whiney, and insecure to men.
The downside of being socially wired is you start to shift focus away from yourself and onto others. If you find yourself spending more time thinking about what's going on with other people you can begin to lose your grip on yourself and your own goals in life. To some people it acts like an escape, either to live vicariously or (National Enquirer style) feel a sense of comfort that some other people's lives are more miserable.
There's a term, "tend your own garden". It's something few women are able to do.