[kaotic]

(03-04-2017 02:47 PM)dopvlur Wrote:  

CASE STUDY

In september 2016 met a girl in a routine night in a food truck spot, she just was another number, I remember grabbed 3 number that sunday night, the next wednesday she was on my pad, I made the classic first date Teriyaki Chicken and I was fingering her 2 hours later. She refused to have sex with me (2nd date girl). The next date I was fucking her, she was another plate, solid 8, 28yo, engineer, nice car, etc. The sex was amazing and the chit chat too, I knew it she was on the wall, but I started to fall in love and asked me for a exclusive relationship, thinked about it 2 weeks then I accepted. It was hard telling 4 plates it was over.

How long was it before you thought you fell in love with her ?

Its good you thought about the exclusivity.

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After 3 months I started to feel trapped, I started to drink once per week, I started to fap because I was daydreaming about getting all the juicy girls from the gym, I started to feel bad about myself, didn't watch my kid a few weekends because I was with her, I quit my job after 5 years looking for a change in another field, bought a PS4 after years without videogaming. I knew everything in myself started to change for bad.

You were definitely subconsciously were ejecting from the relationship and thinking about other things. Even consciously you knew it eventually.

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So last night I tell her it was over, she cried a lot, she tell me she deserved a better men, that she missed opportunities from another guys that were looking for her, I told her I don't want to marry in the next years or have a kid (I'm afraid of having an autistic kid again), I felt very bad last night, for some moments believed it was a wrong decision, she texted me asking if I was loyal during our time (and yes I was loyal). I started to think last night I was going to die alone and she was only doing her best, that she was the one, that I was just being as always egocentric. Don't know if was the best decision, probably will never know, I just want to figure out the next step.

The fact she said that means she wasn't really serious about you two - she was definitely looking around - I'd bet money if you saw her phone or FB messages she was talking to other dudes and had plenty of orbiters who were feeding her ego.

It even raises more questions that she started questioning YOU of all things about being loyal - this leads me to believe even more she might of been doing some shady shit.

We all die, regardless of being with or without someone.

In my eyes - you made a great decision.

You weren't ready - she obviously wasn't serious - you came out ahead.

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Now I don't have a job or business, no girl, no plates, I'll go out with my son later today with my uncles for a family reunion. I'll share this to my friends but I know they don't understand.

Have cash to live a year without work, job offers, many ideas and feel I can't stick to them. Start to play videogames seriously, start a blog, travel, accept a job offer, etc. Only have a planned trip to Mexico DF in march for concerts.

Wanted to share with you, I want to meet any RVF in person, I have time and resources, also if someone wants to share me location independence tips being a mentor let me know, I offer you a nice wingman, advice in HR, and all my experience. Right now my only plan is to see my kid often, help him as much as I can do and years later look if he can live with me (if thats the better for him, due brothers, family, etc.), travel a few months every year if I can make a plan of location independence. Have a lot of free time right now.

Thanks for your time. I apologyze if this belongs to the newbie forum.

You've got some time and money which is great.

FAMILY FIRST - take care of yourself and son.

Find something you love doing and make it a life.

Stop playing video games, start going to the gym instead, stop fapping.

Start looking for work and start posting more RVF - there are meetups happening all the time.

Start poking around the travel and meet up thread, stop drinking so much as well.