Quote: (11-11-2016 06:43 AM)just a human Wrote:
Here is an example of what I mean:
It is a Friday night and I am going out.
On the way to the closest club, I receive a text from one of my plates.
(i was always acting very cool and unemotional with her. Never said any complements to her , never said that i like her)
She: “Are you partying tonight?”
Me: “Yes. Do You want meet me?”
She: “Yes, of course”
Me: “Ok. I will be in bar x. Can you come there?”
She: “Ok. - i'll be there after 20 min”
Me: “ Deal. See You there! “
I went to that bar, grabbed a beer and waited for her. She didn't come.
No texts no calls.
So- at this point-can we call this “flaking” or not?
Here is par two:
After 1,5 hours I sent her a bit needy text:
” What's going on? I am still waiting for You. Are You coming or not?”
No answer.
I don't care about this girl, but this kind of behavior is very disrespectful. And she should be somehow punished for this.
So i wrote very straight and serious:
"Are You playing games with me or what? I don't accept such kind of behavior. I'll be here for 15 minutes more. You have a chance to come and apologize. Other way - you'll never ever hear a word from me again."
Immediately - there was a call from her. She ran to me and apologized 10 times.
40 min. later we had sex at my place.
I asked her later a straight question- "What did you wanted to achieve with such behavior-a drama,attention,did you wanted me to act needy or what?"
Her answer was like: "Yes, all of this"
To me you were too insecure here. Too many questions.
Instead of “Are you partying tonight?” I'd say "we're partying tonight".
Instead of "I will be in bar x. Can you come there?” I'd say "I will be in bar x. come at 10pm"
If she was not there instead of asking another questions I'd go "btw if you're here I'm on 2nd floor, if not you're a loser. ha!". That's it.
In the end you got what you wanted so all is good I guess.
Quote: (11-11-2016 07:59 AM)Mage Wrote:
Attaching flaking to attention whoring is a bit of a stretch and butthurt overanalysis.
Flaking is simply being overwhelmed by other stuff - other cocks, entertainment, remembering birthdays of frenemies, job, college assignments, social media and lacking time and stamina to spend time with boring rejections in person or even via phone when there is so much other things to do.
That's simply modern life, women are overwhelmed by it, just as men are.
You can be sure girls don't flake to eagerly anticipate your butthurt calls - they simply have other more important or pleasant stuff to do then deal with explaining yet to another thirsty dude why she doesn't feel anything for him anymore.
That's what I think too.
It's possible there are some cruel bitches out there who plan those bullshit games to start some drama for their sick entertainment. However that's not common as far I can see. Usually girls flake cause don't really care that much about the particular guy or they have better things to do at a time.
Thing is we as men we can ignore a lot of bullshit to meet with a girl we really like, even if she still hasn't earned our respect. It's just men being men, we like to chase women and we're thinking with our dicks way too often.
Women are not like that. They need to be seduced into participating. At least that's how I see it. It's like she's there at home or at work and some guy texts her to come out and she's like "hmmm I don't l know... do I feel like it? Or not?" and she texts back "i'll let you know".
I mean, many times I witnessed a girl deciding to stay at home to watch some youtube bullshit, which was something she did almost every day, instead of going out, or just because she just returned back home she didn't feel like going out again. Just because of that. To us it's nonsense, but girls live in different reality.
To me flaking is almost like a second nature of women. They don't have that drive to do shit as us. We are the adventurous ones, we usually prefer to do shit, often stupid shit, just to move and go see what's out there. Women just prefer to stay in one cozy place and not risk losing that feeling. I mean usually.
So if we're talking about random girls that I'm not that familiar with and we don't even know each other then some sort of flaking is to be expected. However it is unacceptable that when a girl I know well flakes on me when we're suppose to go together to my friend's wedding or some kind of other important event. In that case I'm putting the bitch in her place hard.