[Beyond Borders]

(01-30-2016 11:28 PM)Fortis Wrote:  

(01-30-2016 09:03 PM)Fast Eddie Wrote:  

I really can't sympathize much with these people. The first 21 years of my life were complete, total, multifactorial shit, and I'm not talking about "existential angst" but enduring objectively harsh conditions in relation to everything from family life to economic hardship.

With all that, I never felt more than the slightest bit of negative thinking let alone the siren song of sinking into depression. Why would I? I always knew what I can do. I'm now in my mid 20's, banging my dream girls in Asia and the hardest decision I have to make is whether or not to come back to the US and embark on a guaranteed 1% career or stay and do more banging. It wasn't easy and if I had started from a higher level I'd be doing even better, but that's life. Anyway, coming up from rock bottom is that much more satisfying.

No man enjoying youth and good health should ever feel despair or hopelessness. I could understand it if you are old or sick, but not otherwise.

Agreed. But I do think a lot of depression and depression symptoms are biological in nature and not just psychological. So you'll meet rich guys, jacked guys, or guys who genuinely have their shit together who, for no apparently reason, fall into a depressive slump. That's why "don't think about sad stuff" sometimes doesn't work as a depression cure. I'm not saying you were saying that, but in nearly every depression thread on RVF people essentially throw out advice that amounts to "don't think about it and it'll go away."

I think it is a lot less biological than you think. According to Albert Ellis, whose strategies are heavily backed by science and a long history of successes, "don't think about bad stuff" is the best advice you could get and one of the most successful cures "on the market."

Unfortunately, that advice is a bit useless without strategies to back it. "Just don't think about it" is lifeless and flat, without substance. It's like telling a guy to "just be himself" to succeed with women; there's actually some truth to that advice, but it's pretty complicated to do it effectively. Likewise, actually changing your thought patterns takes deliberate, conscious, practical, and organized effort. You have to learn how to not think about it - or to be more accurate, how to think other things instead.

I also do agree that the poster you quoted is wrong in refusing to sympathize with people who get stuck in the black hole of their own thoughts. It's a very understandable place to get caught up. We ought not coddle or enable each other, but we should sympathize enough to show our peers the way out and to a healthier way of living.