There is quite a bit of value in DC's post for guys that are looking.
Thank you for sharing your story too.
Lots of guys do everything right with girls they don't care about, then when it comes to girls they actually are attracted to they start messing things up.
Guys can learn a lot from DC's simple comments above.
Most guys think it is a bad thing if a girl leaves them.
There is a lot to be said about the guy who is totally fine with letting high quality girls go. Few things are more attractive to beautiful woman than a guy whose life doesn't revolve around trying to get with her.
I've had some very long dating relationships (read: Not exclusive. I am dating other women) with very high quality girls where early on, when they ask me to be her BF I say: "I can't be your boyfriend. Is that okay with you?" The conversation doesn't continue until she says either yes or no to that question. This is my own preference, but I prefer interactions where the woman takes full responsibility for her own actions. No dancing, no tip-toeing around the obvious. If that deal is not okay with her, I politely thank her for the fun times and I LEAVE. Some women aren't okay with it. That's totally cool. She's a big girl, she can make up her own mind. But guys might be surprised at how many women are refreshed by the honesty and are totally fine with it, and their quality level. These are usually women who bring a lot more to the table than just looks and good sex but that's not a requirement.
Thank you for sharing your story too.
Quote: (10-25-2011 01:10 AM)_DC_ Wrote:
I never really learned how to be genuinely interested in a women and show candid affection. ... the learned behavior of withholding and being aloof.
Lots of guys do everything right with girls they don't care about, then when it comes to girls they actually are attracted to they start messing things up.
Guys can learn a lot from DC's simple comments above.
Quote: (10-25-2011 01:10 AM)_DC_ Wrote:
I was with one girl for several months that was no doubt a high quality girl. Very beautiful and gave me zero shit. She was chill, friendly, and smart. A lot of the static and problems that people talk about on here, vindication, craziness, and anger, she displayed none. She ended the relationship because she didn't feel that I truly cared for her, didn't feel like I thought she was special, etc. Call it whatever you want (the majority would say this was bullshit), but with lots of reflection on my own behavior, and given the honesty of the girl, it seemed completely true.
Most guys think it is a bad thing if a girl leaves them.
There is a lot to be said about the guy who is totally fine with letting high quality girls go. Few things are more attractive to beautiful woman than a guy whose life doesn't revolve around trying to get with her.
I've had some very long dating relationships (read: Not exclusive. I am dating other women) with very high quality girls where early on, when they ask me to be her BF I say: "I can't be your boyfriend. Is that okay with you?" The conversation doesn't continue until she says either yes or no to that question. This is my own preference, but I prefer interactions where the woman takes full responsibility for her own actions. No dancing, no tip-toeing around the obvious. If that deal is not okay with her, I politely thank her for the fun times and I LEAVE. Some women aren't okay with it. That's totally cool. She's a big girl, she can make up her own mind. But guys might be surprised at how many women are refreshed by the honesty and are totally fine with it, and their quality level. These are usually women who bring a lot more to the table than just looks and good sex but that's not a requirement.