[Handsome Creepy Eel]

Nairobi, Kenya. I know what you're probably thinking: HIV, Al-Shabaab, starvation, crime? I found Kenya to be not at all like that, and my two months there were very pleasant and safe. I'll definitely come again. Let's get started:

Currency: Kenyan Shilling (Ksh or Kes). $1 US is approximately 95 kes. IMPORTANT: If you are bringing cash to buy your visa on arrival or to exchange, be sure to bring bills newer than 2007 as the older ones are not accepted anywhere.

Language: Everyone speaks their tribal language, Swahili and English, both of which are official languages. I learned some Swahili because I found it fun, but in general you will never encounter anyone who doesn't speak at least a bit of English.


This bill will buy you a taxi ride to/from CBD from any residential neighborhood, a nice meal at a solid bistro or restaurant, or a bus ticket to anywhere in the country. Most ATMs dispense either these or occasionally 500s.

Cost of living in Kenya is very low, but cost of tourism isn't. Most people who enjoy western-level luxury are tourists from UK and EU, and it pumps up the prices. If you are accustomed to western comforts, don't expect to live cheap here.

   
   

For someone hailing from a fucked up country like me, it was punishing and the next time I come I'll just rent an empty place like a common resident and decorate it myself, then sell the stuff when I leave. I found most stuff to be wildly expensive, although in the USA probably no one would have batted an eye at a $15 restaurant meal or $1000 for monthly rent of an ok apartment (in a nice and safe but definitely not luxurious neighborhood 15 minutes of driving away from CBD).

Street sellers generally have fair prices, as they are meant to serve locals. Souvenir sellers, though, will try to rob you and you can haggle their original prices down to 1/3rd or 1/4th of the original amount. Bringing a local is helpful.

Safaricom and Airtel are the main telecom providers. I was happy with Safaricom's internet bundles (3 GB for 1000 kes, plus some change for texts and calls).

Safety concerns: I found Nairobi to be safe and pleasant, with no problem greater than persistent street sellers. Though generally cautious and taking a taxi when I had to return home after dark, sometimes I also walked around dark places or at late hours and never saw or experienced anything threatening. No one tried to pickpocket me or do anything worse.

   
   
CBD - Perfectly safe during daytime, risky but not so bad at night

   
Middle-class residential area Umoja - perfectly safe during daytime, probably less so at night

Terrorism gives Nairobi a bad rap, especially with high-profile attacks like Westgate and Garissa, but keep in mind that since the Al Shabaab troubles began around 2011, around a thousand people have been killed all over Kenya. For comparison, around three thousand people die in car crashes in California (a state with similar population) every year. So terrorism is definitely a concern, especially in the eastern and northeastern regions, but it's not like it's some scourge that has high odds of affecting you.

Health concerns: While the odds of encountering any of these in Nairobi are low, you are still advised to vaccinate yourself beforehand for Yellow Fever, Hepatitis A and Typhoid. For anti-malaria medication, I advise choosing Malarone (atovaquone-proguanil), a relatively new drug that destroys malaria everywhere in the body (as opposed to just in blood like some others do) and has no or very little side effects. It's more expensive, but it's worth it.
Also, bring an insect repellent spray and make sure that your bedroom has a mosquito net. Don't eat street food and make sure to wash your fruits and vegetables thoroughly.

If you intend to travel outside of Nairobi (I did), these preventive measures become a must. Consult your doctor and CDC's global database for more information: http://wwwnc.cdc.gov/travel/destinations...none/kenya

HIV, despite being rampant in Africa, is not so rampant in Kenya. Be sure to use protection, but you don't need to live in fear.

Note: Like a big part of Kenya, Nairobi lies at an impressive elevation of 1700m. A sensitive person who has always resided at sea level could experience mild altitude sickness.

Climate: The climate in Nairobi is a pleasant eternal spring, with varying levels of rain depending on season. Expect to walk around in long-sleeved but light clothing.

Getting around: From the airport to your chosen residence, you will need a taxi, which costs around 3000 kes. For going around your daily life, most westerners rely on taxis (500-1000 for a ride around CBD, Westlands and surrounding areas). To my knowledge, I was the only westerner to ever enter a matatu (minibus that serves as the main form of transport for local people). Most people who come to Nairobi just get stuck in their air-conditioned hotels and never have any contact with locals outside of tourism industry.

   

The term "Mzungu" is something like "Gringo" - a neutral way of indicating a white person. Expect to hear it a lot if you go to places outside CBD/Westlands.

Food: Kenyan cuisine is an interesting mixture of Mediterranean, Arabic and Chinese ones, with lots of tomatoes, onions and stir-frying. I found it very tasty and healthy, and it weaned me off eating bread with everything like I am prone to doing. Great stuff. You can find western and international cuisines easily too, as there are lots of restaurants.
Note: consumption of wild meat is prohibited in Kenya, but it's possible to run into it occasionally at restaurants like The Carnivore.

Girls: Girls are generally slim (despite having stronger thighs and asses as typical for Africans), long-haired and pleasant. Tattoos and piercings are almost unheard of and are not viewed as anything good. Girls are already positively predisposed towards strangers, viewing (sometimes rightfully) local men as being brutish and clumsy. I was able to witness for myself the atrocious game of African guys, so I can say with confidence that World game will serve you well. Just be a confident nice guy and you will get far. Treat the girls with kindness, you don't want to ruin them for others.

Feminism is practically nonexistent, with any public outrage or activism centering around actual violations of women's rights (such as a crowd of men abusing a woman in a bus and stripping her naked). There are some political action trying to introduce gender quotas in order to suck up to the West, but in general Kenya is safe from the evils that plague our parts of the world, and thankfully will stay that way for a long time.

Quote:

But Obama’s call for universal gay rights was quickly dismissed by Kenyatta, who described the issue as something “our culture, our society does not accept.”

“For Kenyans today, the issue of gay rights is really a non-issue. We want to focus on other areas that are day-to-day living for our people,” he said, citing heath concerns and women’s rights.

“This issue is not really an issue that is on the foremost of mind for Kenyans, and that is a fact," he said to some applause.

Beyond Nairobi:

   
A small village and its commercial activity around the inter-city road

Rural Kenya is pleasant and safe, and people are kinder and less inclined to view you as a walking pile of cash like in Nairobi. It's almost unheard of to see a white person, although an NGO or backpacker person does make their way occasionally. You can stay at very decent hotels in small towns (like Nakuru, Narok, Kisumu or Kisii) for 2500 kes per night, breakfast included, which is very cheap.

Safaris and safari resorts usually cost 15-25 000 shilling per night per person (various stuff included or not included in the package - always ask), which for me is outrageously high and almost unaffordable, but in all fairness it is worth it (if you pick a good resort). I stayed at Kongoni Lodge on the ARR Reserve near Lake Naivasha (2 hrs northwest of Nairobi) and it offers a very good value for money. I left extremely happy and satisfied and would recommend it to anyone.

Note: if you travel (whether it is by rent-a-car or by bus) around Kenya, be aware of the insanely placed road bumps. They are savagely high and will massacre you if you don't stop to zero km/h before them and cross very slowly. On the other hand, travelling around the rural areas is worth it simply to see the vast stretches of untouched savannah and giraffes calmly wandering alongside the road. If you have time to kill and have been properly vaccinated and supplied with anti-malaria medicines, be sure to explore Kenya.

Got any questions? Just ask