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Interesting real life approach from girls perspective. - smashley - 07-25-2016
Just came across this on YouTube. Thought I would share. It's a real life approach from a guy onto a girl with her commentary and thought process post approach. No PUA setup just an honest approach. Just shows how girls think. I thought it was a fine approach but shows some depressing realities on how girls think it's weird. Interesting to read the comments below as well. Thoughts?
Also think this guy will do just fine with more approaches. It's just finding the right one that finds him attractive.
https://youtu.be/KU3luByWM-M
Interesting real life approach from girls perspective. - JayJuanGee - 07-25-2016
Quote: (07-25-2016 01:05 PM)smashley Wrote:
Just came across this on YouTube. Thought I would share. It's a real life approach from a guy onto a girl with her commentary and thought process post approach. No PUA setup just an honest approach. Just shows how girls think. I thought it was a fine approach but shows some depressing realities on how girls think it's weird. Interesting to read the comments below as well. Thoughts?
Also think this guy will do just fine with more approaches. It's just finding the right one that finds him attractive.
https://youtu.be/KU3luByWM-M
I watched the video... It is short enough, so I feel that I did not waste too much of my life with it. The good thing about the video is that it pretty much recorded the verbal part of whole approach... and we got a little bit of an idea of the scene too, which is a girl on the beach by herself.
First, I am unsure about what value comes from the girl's perspective? Who can give a ratt's ass about that, except that maybe she shows that she would have been open to some kind of better approach in this instance.
Second, you say that the guy's approach was good, and I really wonder? The leaving the bag with the girl was good; however, he jumped straight into asking her out after asking her name. I suppose that could work with some girls, but it seems like a small minority of chicks are going to be into the guy straight from the start.. without at least a little bit of small talk first.
Interesting real life approach from girls perspective. - smashley - 07-25-2016
Quote: (07-25-2016 01:17 PM)JayJuanGee Wrote:
Quote: (07-25-2016 01:05 PM)smashley Wrote:
Just came across this on YouTube. Thought I would share. It's a real life approach from a guy onto a girl with her commentary and thought process post approach. No PUA setup just an honest approach. Just shows how girls think. I thought it was a fine approach but shows some depressing realities on how girls think it's weird. Interesting to read the comments below as well. Thoughts?
Also think this guy will do just fine with more approaches. It's just finding the right one that finds him attractive.
https://youtu.be/KU3luByWM-M
I watched the video... It is short enough, so I feel that I did not waste too much of my life with it. The good thing about the video is that it pretty much recorded the verbal part of whole approach... and we got a little bit of an idea of the scene too, which is a girl on the beach by herself.
First, I am unsure about what value comes from the girl's perspective? Who can give a ratt's ass about that, except that maybe she shows that she would have been open to some kind of better approach in this instance.
Second, you say that the guy's approach was good, and I really wonder? The leaving the bag with the girl was good; however, he jumped straight into asking her out after asking her name. I suppose that could work with some girls, but it seems like a small minority of chicks are going to be into the guy straight from the start.. without at least a little bit of small talk first.
What is unique about the video is it is real life. Not some actors staged, and it is coming from the womans side. We see it all the time from the guys side where they secretly record and we speculate on what the woman is thinking. This was coming from the other side which I haven't seen too much.
It may in some ways still be biased as this girl has followers which she may be putting on a front to impress with some of her comments. But I think her initial feelings still show. I just don't like that we in this world think its weird if a stranger talks to you. Kinda sad really. Thought the dude was cool and not too aggressive.
I don't think the approach was fantastic, I just think it was fine. The backpack thing I think wasn't great, and I think he should have just went up and talked to her without an excuse to. But overall he said hello. Made a short amount of small talk and asked her out. It's pretty basic but thats all that is needed. He could have talked to her for another minute or two to make it ideal, but talking to her for 3-10 minutes I don't think would have changed the outcome.
Lots of studies show a girl likes you or not in less than 3 minutes. And 90'% of that like comes from body language and looks. Not so much the content of what you say. So get in and get out and play the numbers game. I think this guy will do fine with more approaches.
Interesting real life approach from girls perspective. - Gorgiass - 07-25-2016
Interesting bag gambit, weak approach relying entirely on looks and perceived exoticness, although he did loads better than I'd do in German. "I'm back, did you have to fight off any bandits?" would be decent to reengage, banter, then "Well hey, I feel really bad you had to hit that bagsnatcher with your purse to protect my beer. Let me get your number and I'll buy you a drink sometime to make up for it" to close, off the top of my head.
If you can make a woman laugh - associate positive emotion with your presence, and banter - demonstrate social intuition and value, you'll exponentially better than just walking up and asking what she's doing later.
Interesting real life approach from girls perspective. - smashley - 07-25-2016
Quote: (07-25-2016 01:46 PM)Gorgiass Wrote:
Interesting bag gambit, weak approach relying entirely on looks and perceived exoticness, although he did loads better than I'd do in German. "I'm back, did you have to fight off any bandits?" would be decent to reengage, banter, then "Well hey, I feel really bad you had to hit that bagsnatcher with your purse to protect my beer. Let me get your number and I'll buy you a drink sometime to make up for it" to close, off the top of my head.
If you can make a woman laugh - associate positive emotion with your presence, and banter - demonstrate social intuition and value, you'll exponentially better than just walking up and asking what she's doing later.
I don't believe he was relying on looks or exoticness. He just happens to be a foreigner and was trying to find a girl while he was in town. He can't control his accent and didn't say anything about his looks. I just think he was just trying to get laid and keep it simple.
I would not reengage this girl or recommend anyone else do the same, it's clear she was not interested. Better to use time approaching other girls. She is clearly not open to cold approach with this particular guy. Maybe a guy more her style or maybe not. Remember would George Clooney have to re approach this girl to get her number? No she would just give it. Girls help you out when they like you. They are not playing hard to get.
I've done a lot of approaches and making women laugh is a good thing as it shows you are not too invested and just having fun, but it is not a requirement. You aren't the clown providing entertainment. Just a fun loving guy. Overall his method was fine, prob just should have talked to her just a hair more. Other than that it was fine she was just not available or interested. Move on to the next.
Interesting real life approach from girls perspective. - JayJuanGee - 07-25-2016
Quote: (07-25-2016 01:35 PM)smashley Wrote:
Quote: (07-25-2016 01:17 PM)JayJuanGee Wrote:
edited out
What is unique about the video is it is real life. Not some actors staged, and it is coming from the womans side. We see it all the time from the guys side where they secretly record and we speculate on what the woman is thinking. This was coming from the other side which I haven't seen too much.
Actually, I agree with you that the video itself is pretty decent in terms of showing the facts of what actually happened, and we can likely have a certain amount of confidence that it was not selectively picked from the guy's perspective.....
Quote: (07-25-2016 01:35 PM)smashley Wrote:
It may in some ways still be biased as this girl has followers which she may be putting on a front to impress with some of her comments.
That's true too that the girl may have only chosen that video because of some bias that she has, but after watching the video, I am fairly confident that it is an accurate rendition of the underlying facts of what actually happened with the girl on the beach.. and that she did not appear to edit anything out.
Quote: (07-25-2016 01:35 PM)smashley Wrote:
But I think her initial feelings still show.
I suppose that could be a little bit important to know, yet we already know that some geographic areas are going to have girls that are more or less receptive to approaches, but it does not really change the fact that guys should still approach even when the chicks may have some kind of fantastical belief that it is strange.
We did not see her body, but that chick seems pretty attractive, so I am certain that she already understands that guys are going to be approaching her on a regular basis.
Quote: (07-25-2016 01:35 PM)smashley Wrote:
I just don't like that we in this world think its weird if a stranger talks to you. Kinda sad really.
We already know that some places are easier than others, and as guys we just need to figure out ways to improve our own strategies to deal with such conditions whether that is avoiding or engaging or some other variation that we believe will work for our own situation.
Quote: (07-25-2016 01:35 PM)smashley Wrote:
Thought the dude was cool and not too aggressive.
Sure, he seemed cool and not too aggressive, but also, as I already mentioned, he seemed to go straight to asking her out and causing the situation to be more awkward than necessary...
You know I am not exactly an expert, but it seems pretty obvious that he just handled that badly.. and there are a lot of approaches that would have been less awkward, and there is certainly no one way to handle the situation because every guy is going to have different ways of going back and forth.. but for example, he could have come back to get his bag, and then started out by saying something like...
"Thanks a lot for watching my bag... I realize that it is a bit strange that I left my bag with you, but I am traveling and I had to run into the store and I did not want to bring in my bag... blah blah blah.. I know it is strange. I was wondering if you knew about some places in this area that young people go out? [or] I notice that you have a book, are you a college student? [or] you know I am a little particular about coffee, and I was trying to find a store that has a decent selection of coffee, do you happen to know of any stores for that?
Anyhow, get her to respond a tiny bit to something (besides her name) before going straight into asking her out, no?
Quote: (07-25-2016 01:35 PM)smashley Wrote:
I don't think the approach was fantastic, I just think it was fine.
The only thing fine about it is that he actually did it rather than not doing it, but it was very weak in terms of what he said.
Quote: (07-25-2016 01:35 PM)smashley Wrote:
The backpack thing I think wasn't great, and I think he should have just went up and talk to her without an excuse to. But overall he said hello. Made a short amount of small talk and asked her out. It's pretty basic but thats all that is needed.
I don't think that leaving the backpack was any kind of problem as long as he kind of said something about it when he returned, and it was not a bad thing to allow him to see that she was willing to do it, which showed that she was not a total bitch.
Quote: (07-25-2016 01:35 PM)smashley Wrote:
He could have talked to her for another minute or two to make it ideal, but talking to her for 3-10 minutes I don't think would have changed the outcome.
I don't disagree that his approach could have worked with some girls... probably a very small minority.. and maybe more if he is especially hot looking - which maybe he is, since he has such high expectations (he may be spoiled by his good looks) that he can go straight into asking her out. In the end, it's not about the length of time that he spends talking, it is about dropping a bit of info about himself (including DHV) and gauging a tiny bit more about her in order that he can hook his insta-date or soon to be date into something that may be within what she is willing or able to do.
Quote: (07-25-2016 01:35 PM)smashley Wrote:
Lots of studies show a girl likes you or not in less than 3 minutes.
And 90'% of that like comes from body language and looks. Not so much the content of what you say. So get in and get out and play the numbers game. I think this guy will do fine with more approaches.
I think that I may be repeating myself, but the guy spent about 15 seconds before he asked her out, and I think that RVF guys attempt to improve game no matter how they look.. So, sure I agree that there is a lot based on looks, but if all we rely upon is looks, then we may as well give up on trying anything else, no?
Interesting real life approach from girls perspective. - WestIndianArchie - 07-25-2016
Quote: (07-25-2016 01:05 PM)smashley Wrote:
Just came across this on YouTube. Thought I would share. It's a real life approach from a guy onto a girl with her commentary and thought process post approach. No PUA setup just an honest approach.
Not sure why you assume that this was not staged.
The fact that she recorded this for her audience already means she wasn't just being her regular self. She was putting on a face, like a waitress.
Quote: (07-25-2016 01:05 PM)smashley Wrote:
Just shows how girls think. I thought it was a fine approach but shows some depressing realities on how girls think it's weird. Interesting to read the comments below as well. Thoughts?
Bad approach.
Quote: (07-25-2016 01:05 PM)smashley Wrote:
Also think this guy will do just fine with more approaches. It's just finding the right one that finds him attractive.
https://youtu.be/KU3luByWM-M
Don't be denying game up in here. This was anti game.
Let's use a 4 factor analysis
1) context
- beach
- day
- social interaction with strangers is minimal.
- social contract requires typical decency, but bit much more
2) likely mind state of the girl
- prone
- lying on her back
- blissfully unaware
- in her own mind
- not particularly social
So if you come at a girl from her blind spot, she's going to naturally be nervous. Which means upon approach you have to handle her emotional state.
3) his mind
- easy target
- go direct
4) game tech used
He asks her to watch his things, basically adding her for compliance. She gives what the social contract requires, but this is not thesame as opening a girl, showing value, getting her to chase, and then getting compliance.
Technically it's an open
Technically he got compliance
And technically being a dominant male should show value to her
But what was her reaction? No attraction, just confusion.
However she tries to smooth over his bad approach by making a joke.
And since he's emotionally obtuse, he barrels ahead not even acknowledging her, or the opportunity to build value.
From there he gets logistics from a chick who doesn't want to cooperate. And then pushes for the meet.
When it's clear that he's failing, he tries to salvage his ego by saying it's nice to be direct.
Like most pickup videos, this was PAINFUL to watch.
He might get laid in the fatherland, but not here.
For a half second, I feel sorry for the girl.
Mouth breather
WIA
Interesting real life approach from girls perspective. - JayJuanGee - 07-25-2016
Quote: (07-25-2016 02:07 PM)smashley Wrote:
Quote: (07-25-2016 01:46 PM)Gorgiass Wrote:
[edited out]
I would not reengage this girl or recommend anyone else do the same, it's clear she was not interested. Better to use time approaching other girls. She is clearly not open to cold approach with this particular guy. Maybe a guy more her style or maybe not. Remember would George Clooney have to re approach this girl to get her number? No she would just give it. Girls help you out when they like you. They are not playing hard to get.
For some reason, you keep asserting that 1) the chick was a lost cause in terms of whether she could have been interest, 2) the guy's approach was fine, and 3) a better looking guy would have been successful.
All three of these presumptions seem to be quite off base in terms of the video that we actually saw.
1) she was questioning whether she handled the situation well, which shows that she may have responded better and/or that she was not sure about the appropriateness of her response.
2) pretty obvious that the approach was weak.. and I have already given a few reasons, and likely some other guys could describe additional reasons besides what I said
3) we do not have enough information about the guy to know whether he was attractive or not. He sounded o.k. and he looked o.k. in terms of what we saw of his fitness. We did not see enough to know his attractiveness level, so you cannot really reasonably presume more about his looks.
Interesting real life approach from girls perspective. - JayJuanGee - 07-25-2016
Quote: (07-25-2016 02:17 PM)WestIndianArchie Wrote:
For a half second, I feel sorry for the girl.
Exactly. Kind of difficult to feel sorry for the girl in this situation.
After reading your assertion regarding whether the girl set this up, I will concede that she likely staged the situation and just had her phone ready to record as soon as he returned... but even if she did set up the second part of the interaction (knowing that sooner or later the guy was coming back for his bag), the video remains quite telling in terms of a variety of weaknesses in the guy's attempt to follow up with her.
Interesting real life approach from girls perspective. - WestIndianArchie - 07-25-2016
I'm not saying that she hired ESL guy to hit on her. But she's not being authentic with the camera running. She was performing for her audience. If he managed to pull her, that would not be on her channel.
" how some random stranger talked me into anal" She ain't Trish.
And I outlined just some of his weaknesses.
It's OP's dangerous thinking that needs to be checked. You got all kinds of lurkers who saw nothing wrong with his approach, and think the chick is messed up.
This pull attempt is the definition of the "c" word.
WIA
Interesting real life approach from girls perspective. - smashley - 07-25-2016
Quote: (07-25-2016 02:10 PM)JayJuanGee Wrote:
Sure, he seemed cool and not too aggressive, but also, as I already mentioned, he seemed to go straight to asking her out and causing the situation to be more awkward than necessary...
You know I am not exactly an expert, but it seems pretty obvious that he just handled that badly.. and there are a lot of approaches that would have been less awkward, and there is certainly no one way to handle the situation because every guy is going to have different ways of going back and forth.. but for example, he could have come back to get his bag, and then started out by saying something like...
"Thanks a lot for watching my bag... I realize that it is a bit strange that I left my bag with you, but I am traveling and I had to run into the store and I did not want to bring in my bag... blah blah blah.. I know it is strange. I was wondering if you knew about some places in this area that young people go out? [or] I notice that you have a book, are you a college student? [or] you know I am a little particular about coffee, and I was trying to find a store that has a decent selection of coffee, do you happen to know of any stores for that?
Anyhow, get her to respond a tiny bit to something (besides her name) before going straight into asking her out, no?
Yes agree. I think he should have spent another 1-2 minutes talking to her and getting things a little more comfortable. I think he rushed it, but I think he did so because English is not his native language. I can respect that. Don't think I would do great in his native country as you stated.
Quote: (07-25-2016 01:35 PM)smashley Wrote:
Lots of studies show a girl likes you or not in less than 3 minutes.
And 90'% of that like comes from body language and looks. Not so much the content of what you say. So get in and get out and play the numbers game. I think this guy will do fine with more approaches.
I think that I may be repeating myself, but the guy spent about 15 seconds before he asked her out, and I think that RVF guys attempt to improve game no matter how they look.. So, sure I agree that there is a lot based on looks, but if all we rely upon is looks, then we may as well give up on trying anything else, no?
[/quote]
Agreed. I don't mean to get into a looks vs game debate. I just feel game is way more important in the process after getting the number. Approaches are rarely perfectly smooth and there is always some awkwardness involved. I just personally believe game matters way more in girl retention and getting to the bang, rather than the initial approach.
The good news about looks however is that attraction is all over the board. Every girl just like everyguy has their own taste. Sure there is a general outlook on attractiveness, but I see so much variation in what people like. Some girls i think are not great guys love and some girls I love guys don't think are hot. Believe it or not it is the same with women. And in all my approaches and dating I have seen the same. The only way to the bottom of it is to approach approach approach. This will sort it out for you.
Interesting real life approach from girls perspective. - redbeard - 07-25-2016
Forum member caught on tape!
Quote: (11-27-2009 05:57 PM)Lumiere Wrote:
Typical open. I start off by just going to the beach in shorts and flip flops, walking along the beach and when I see a cute girl (they are usually by themselves or with one female friend). Take off the flips flops and ask them if they can watch them for me while I go in the water. Nobody ever says no to this. Nobody.
Go for a swim for 5 mins, no more. The interesting thing about this part is that quite often they will watch you while you go for the swim. If they do it's a fairly good IOI.
The vibe when you come back is key. I usually act all surprised and say "Wow, my stuff is still here!" then smile and tell them they did a great job. The fun / playful vibe usually gets a smile and makes them receptive.
thread-1350.html
Interesting real life approach from girls perspective. - smashley - 07-25-2016
Quote: (07-25-2016 02:37 PM)WestIndianArchie Wrote:
I'm not saying that she hired ESL guy to hit on her. But she's not being authentic with the camera running. She was performing for her audience. If he managed to pull her, that would not be on her channel.
" how some random stranger talked me into anal" She ain't Trish.
And I outlined just some of his weaknesses.
It's OP's dangerous thinking that needs to be checked. You got all kinds of lurkers who saw nothing wrong with his approach, and think the chick is messed up.
This pull attempt is the definition of the "c" word.
WIA
Her channel is not even about this sort of thing. Highly unlikely she staged or hired for this. I agree her response may be biased by her thought to appeal to her following.
Dangerous thinking? I'm not posting this to say this is how you pickup girls. I just said based on his limited english and knowledge of our culture he did fine. He said hello, he made a few basic statements and asked her out. It's not rocket science where you have to approach at a 30 degree angle, with the wind blowing north/northwest, 5 seconds after she put down her phone, and mention 3 comedic phrases. Just keep it simple. You will have way more approaches if you just keep it simple. He was not overly persistent and just went for it. Think it was fine. Not ideal. But fine.
I hope you don't take offense. I think game is great and helps everyone. I think it applies a lot more to retention and getting to the bang though. Approaches are about confidence, body language, looking your best, and going for it. I think most who approach a lot like myself would agree.
Interesting real life approach from girls perspective. - JayJuanGee - 07-25-2016
Quote: (07-25-2016 02:37 PM)WestIndianArchie Wrote:
I'm not saying that she hired ESL guy to hit on her. But she's not being authentic with the camera running. She was performing for her audience. If he managed to pull her, that would not be on her channel.
I thought that I understood what you meant by her kind of staging the matter in terms of waiting for the guy to come back and to turn on the camera. I was not really elaborating regarding the potential for selection bias, which may also have some truth to it.
Quote: (07-25-2016 02:37 PM)WestIndianArchie Wrote:
And I outlined just some of his weaknesses.
I personally think that it is part of what could be valuable regarding the footage. I don't think that it is uncommon for guys to mess up in ways that this particular guy did. I have personally had more fucked up approaches than this particular one, that's for sure.
Quote: (07-25-2016 02:37 PM)WestIndianArchie Wrote:
It's OP's dangerous thinking that needs to be checked. You got all kinds of lurkers who saw nothing wrong with his approach, and think the chick is messed up.
Actually, from the title, I initially considered that OP could have been trolling, but at least he did seem to attempt to kind of flesh things out a little bit better in some of his subsequent posts, but you are correct that he does seem to be spewing various anti-gaming principles, besides just the title of the initial post. And, so in the end, it just likely becomes confusing when RVF guys have to attempt to sort through such nonsense.
Quote: (07-25-2016 02:37 PM)WestIndianArchie Wrote:
This pull attempt is the definition of the "c" word.
I may not be atuned enough to specialty language, so I didn't quite get "the 'c' word."
Interesting real life approach from girls perspective. - smashley - 07-25-2016
Quote: (07-25-2016 02:48 PM)redbeard Wrote:
Forum member caught on tape!
Quote: (11-27-2009 05:57 PM)Lumiere Wrote:
Typical open. I start off by just going to the beach in shorts and flip flops, walking along the beach and when I see a cute girl (they are usually by themselves or with one female friend). Take off the flips flops and ask them if they can watch them for me while I go in the water. Nobody ever says no to this. Nobody.
Go for a swim for 5 mins, no more. The interesting thing about this part is that quite often they will watch you while you go for the swim. If they do it's a fairly good IOI.
The vibe when you come back is key. I usually act all surprised and say "Wow, my stuff is still here!" then smile and tell them they did a great job. The fun / playful vibe usually gets a smile and makes them receptive.
thread-1350.html
Hilarious dude. Nice find. Got him.
Interesting real life approach from girls perspective. - WestIndianArchie - 07-25-2016
Quote: (07-25-2016 02:55 PM)JayJuanGee Wrote:
Quote: (07-25-2016 02:37 PM)WestIndianArchie Wrote:
This pull attempt is the definition of the "c" word.
I may not be atuned enough to specialty language, so I didn't quite get "the 'c' word."
Creepy
Interesting real life approach from girls perspective. - JayJuanGee - 07-25-2016
Quote: (07-25-2016 02:37 PM)smashley Wrote:
Quote: (07-25-2016 02:10 PM)JayJuanGee Wrote:
[edited out]
Agreed. I don't mean to get into a looks vs game debate. I just feel game is way more important in the process after getting the number. Approaches are rarely perfectly smooth and there is always some awkwardness involved. I just personally believe game matters way more in girl retention and getting to the bang, rather than the initial approach.
Your distinction seems quite arbitrary and forced. Of course, game matters in all aspects and contexts, even though game may be applied in different ways by different guys and with differing intensities. You seem to be somehow attempting to justify some kind of denial of gaming and emphasis of looks while you are asserting that you are not doing that... getting a bit ridiculous, no?
Quote: (07-25-2016 02:37 PM)smashley Wrote:
The good news about looks however is that attraction is all over the board. Every girl just like everyguy has their own taste. Sure there is a general outlook on attractiveness, but I see so much variation in what people like. Some girls i think are not great guys love and some girls I love guys don't think are hot. Believe it or not it is the same with women. And in all my approaches and dating I have seen the same.
guys tend to emphasize looks more than women, and sure everyone has their own preferences in terms of looks, and so you are saying a lot without really saying anything, here.
Quote: (07-25-2016 02:37 PM)smashley Wrote:
The only way to the bottom of it is to approach approach approach. This will sort it out for you.
We don't employ approaches in order to achieve a numbers game, which you asserted earlier as well. We approach in order to work out various matters that work better for us, and to increase our opportunities with women. Approaching is not merely a matter of doing it a whole lot of time in order that you will find the women who picks you and loves you for who you are. There is some guy agency involved in approaching and some thoughts that with practice guys can get girls to say yes when they would have otherwise said no if the guy had employed a weaker approach.
Interesting real life approach from girls perspective. - smashley - 07-25-2016
Quote: (07-25-2016 02:20 PM)JayJuanGee Wrote:
Quote: (07-25-2016 02:07 PM)smashley Wrote:
Quote: (07-25-2016 01:46 PM)Gorgiass Wrote:
[edited out]
I would not reengage this girl or recommend anyone else do the same, it's clear she was not interested. Better to use time approaching other girls. She is clearly not open to cold approach with this particular guy. Maybe a guy more her style or maybe not. Remember would George Clooney have to re approach this girl to get her number? No she would just give it. Girls help you out when they like you. They are not playing hard to get.
For some reason, you keep asserting that 1) the chick was a lost cause in terms of whether she could have been interest, 2) the guy's approach was fine, and 3) a better looking guy would have been successful.
All three of these presumptions seem to be quite off base in terms of the video that we actually saw.
1) she was questioning whether she handled the situation well, which shows that she may have responded better and/or that she was not sure about the appropriateness of her response.
2) pretty obvious that the approach was weak.. and I have already given a few reasons, and likely some other guys could describe additional reasons besides what I said
3) we do not have enough information about the guy to know whether he was attractive or not. He sounded o.k. and he looked o.k. in terms of what we saw of his fitness. We did not see enough to know his attractiveness level, so you cannot really reasonably presume more about his looks.
Hey thanks for the comments. I hope I was clear, but maybe not. I am not saying that if this guy was better looking he may have been successful. That might or might not be true as well. Maybe not even if he was her type. She may be social circle only game, and be completely cold to cold approach, or she may have not been into it at the moment. There are so many factors you can't predict. You can see however that I believe this girl was just not into it. So spend your time on other girls not this one. No reengages is gonna change that.
I think what the girl was wondering about the appropriateness of her response was whether she came off as a bitch. I believe she was not interested in the guy from the get go or not into being approached, however she was concerned about looking like a bitch or being rude. Thats why she posed the question. Girls have this overwhelming fear of hurting a guys feelings. It's stupid, but thats how they are. She loved the attention of the approach, thats why she posted it most likely. But was concerned she looked like a bitch to her followers but she wanted to post it to give her an ego boost. I do like how the guy told her to just be direct and say no.
Game and approach was not great. Just fine. Hope I can be clear on that again.
Thanks again for the comments man. Like the opinions.
Interesting real life approach from girls perspective. - WestIndianArchie - 07-25-2016
You're clearly new to the game in general, and this forum in particular.
WIA
Interesting real life approach from girls perspective. - smashley - 07-25-2016
Quote: (07-25-2016 03:07 PM)JayJuanGee Wrote:
Quote: (07-25-2016 02:37 PM)smashley Wrote:
Quote: (07-25-2016 02:10 PM)JayJuanGee Wrote:
[edited out]
Agreed. I don't mean to get into a looks vs game debate. I just feel game is way more important in the process after getting the number. Approaches are rarely perfectly smooth and there is always some awkwardness involved. I just personally believe game matters way more in girl retention and getting to the bang, rather than the initial approach.
Your distinction seems quite arbitrary and forced. Of course, game matters in all aspects and contexts, even though game may be applied in different ways by different guys and with differing intensities. You seem to be somehow attempting to justify some kind of denial of gaming and emphasis of looks while you are asserting that you are not doing that... getting a bit ridiculous, no?
Not forced at all. Look this is just my opinion though all my years of approaches and analyzing all my experiences and others. It is okay to have a differing opinion. Just sharing my experience and knowledge.
Quote: (07-25-2016 02:37 PM)smashley Wrote:
The good news about looks however is that attraction is all over the board. Every girl just like everyguy has their own taste. Sure there is a general outlook on attractiveness, but I see so much variation in what people like. Some girls i think are not great guys love and some girls I love guys don't think are hot. Believe it or not it is the same with women. And in all my approaches and dating I have seen the same.
guys tend to emphasize looks more than women, and sure everyone has their own preferences in terms of looks, and so you are saying a lot without really saying anything, here.
Well it is how the world works. I can't make one broad statement to encompass such a complex issue such as physical attraction. Why do some girls like latin men, and some girls like pale emo guys? The way it is. All my point is saying is that you need to approach the best that you can, looking your best, and ask them out. Some game applies, but mostly on cold approach it is just being confident, build comfort, and ask them out. From there game is more crucial in retaining the girl and building attraction to get to the bang.
Quote: (07-25-2016 02:37 PM)smashley Wrote:
The only way to the bottom of it is to approach approach approach. This will sort it out for you.
We don't employ approaches in order to achieve a numbers game, which you asserted earlier as well. We approach in order to work out various matters that work better for us, and to increase our opportunities with women. Approaching is not merely a matter of doing it a whole lot of time in order that you will find the women who picks you and loves you for who you are. There is some guy agency involved in approaching and some thoughts that with practice guys can get girls to say yes when they would have otherwise said no if the guy had employed a weaker approach.
No doubt with approaches you will improve and get better and learn more what appeals. But it is difficult because what appeals to one person may not appeal to another. I don't want it to sound like a robotic grind. Although in some ways it kinda is.
I will say though that your method is a good outlook. Looking at it from an improvement standpoint makes it see a lot more appealing and fun to do. It also provides the smiles and rush you need when you do it. I like it.
Thanks
Interesting real life approach from girls perspective. - smashley - 07-25-2016
Quote: (07-25-2016 03:16 PM)WestIndianArchie Wrote:
You're clearly new to the game in general, and this forum in particular.
WIA
New to the forum yes. New to game no. 13 years.
Hope you guys get out there and approach and have fun. Life is good!
Interesting real life approach from girls perspective. - JayJuanGee - 07-25-2016
Quote: (07-25-2016 03:10 PM)smashley Wrote:
Quote: (07-25-2016 02:20 PM)JayJuanGee Wrote:There are so many factors you can't predict.
[edited out]
Yeah, there are so many factors that you cannot predict, and they guy got his opening, and he spent about 15 seconds assessing the situation before he went for the meet-up.
Quote: (07-25-2016 03:10 PM)smashley Wrote:
You can see however that I believe this girl was just not into it. So spend your time on other girls not this one. No reengages is gonna change that.
Yes, you keep repeating that conclusion about your belief that she was not into the guy no matter what, and I already asserted mostly why I disagree with you about that. We do not need to repeat ourselves more on this point.
Your second point about not reengaging is taking the situation to another level, and sounds as if you are just throwing out hypothetical gamer language just for the purpose of throwing it out there. When the guy fucks up that badly, he is going to have to come off with some fairly serious corrections if he wants to reengage. I personally believe that there could be ways for him to reengage, if he wanted to, and his advantage is that he already met her.. and the other point is that she is not necessarily opposed to him (despite your continued assertion of such presumed opposition).
Quote: (07-25-2016 03:10 PM)smashley Wrote:
I think what the girl was wondering about the appropriateness of her response was whether she came off as a bitch.
That may be true, and maybe even has a fairly high likelihood of being true.. but does it matter very much? In my thinking it mostly shows that she is potentially receptive to interacting with the guy.
Quote: (07-25-2016 03:10 PM)smashley Wrote:
Girls have this overwhelming fear of hurting a guys feelings. It's stupid, but thats how they are.
I doubt it. All non-psychotic people are concerned about how they interact with people for a variety of reasons.... and you seem to be getting on a tangent when you want to analyze in more detail than that.
Quote: (07-25-2016 03:10 PM)smashley Wrote:
She loved the attention of the approach, thats why she posted it most likely.
Most girls like attention, especially those who have blogs and who are posting about the attention that they have gotten.
Quote: (07-25-2016 03:10 PM)smashley Wrote:
Game and approach was not great. Just fine. Hope I can be clear on that again.
Yes, you keep repeating that unsubstantiated conclusion that seems to be a bit contrary to the actual facts, but you are entitled to your opinion.
Interesting real life approach from girls perspective. - XXL - 07-25-2016
3 important lessons from this video [assuming it's real]...
+ It's on you to lead conversation at all times. LEAD. Do not put too much pressure on the girl. Do not give her too much control over the interaction. The guy from a video did just that. Beside all his fumbling and hesitation and very weak voice he was trying to break the ice and then make her carry on the conversation instead of providing good conversation first [90/10 rule]. Very common mistake I see a lot. Breaking the ice is not enough. You absolutely have to be able to talk nonstop for a at least 10 minutes straight. Only then you become good at opening and hooking.
+ Never eject just because the conversation feels weird at the beginning. It's natural to be weird. When it's bad it's good. This is especially for you "nexting" guys who bail at any sign of inconvenience from a girl. The girl from the video acted completely natural and normal for a girl who was forced to have a social interaction with a guy she doesn't know. Her reactions were perfectly fine. Her debrief at the end only highlight that. She knew very well she was lame and not cool.
+ Do not ask for a date or for a number too early. It's like trying to sell your shit when the customer is still indifferent to your offer. What he should have done was to carry on the conversation and mix it with flirting, teasing and building some comfort at first and just have a good time together for at least 15 minutes or more [most probably more] before even starting to talk about potential meet up. Best way to orchestrate the meet up, as usual, was to find out what she likes to do in general in life and base his hangout around that.
I personally think the video is real. She was playing with her phone on the beach, probably trying to take photos so the camera was on, when he came up and asked her to watch for his stuff. She knew he would come back for it so she kept recording. Once it was over she just commented on what happened after that. The fact that she uploaded this video tells me that it was real. If he pulled her from the beach this video would not be uploaded in the first place.
Interesting real life approach from girls perspective. - Barron - 07-25-2016
He had the golden opportunity to neg her about agreeing to do things for complete strangers... also the retarded glasses that she thinks make her look cool... Nothing.
The bag idea was a good start but he didn't take it anywhere, and her dumbass comment about it being a bomb was his opportunity to make fun of her.
That's three chances he had to make her qualify:
She watched a bag for a total stranger
Retarded glasses
The bomb comment "I'm like, Omg, is it a bomb?"
Nothing.
Pushing for the meet when she's not interested and you haven't DHV'd comes off as a last ditch thing. But hey, she's clearly another dumb American hole that somehow stayed thin so why not try?
Interesting real life approach from girls perspective. - smashley - 07-25-2016
Quote: (07-25-2016 03:42 PM)JayJuanGee Wrote:
Quote: (07-25-2016 03:10 PM)smashley Wrote:
Quote: (07-25-2016 02:20 PM)JayJuanGee Wrote:There are so many factors you can't predict.
[edited out]
Yeah, there are so many factors that you cannot predict, and they guy got his opening, and he spent about 15 seconds assessing the situation before he went for the meet-up.
Quote: (07-25-2016 03:10 PM)smashley Wrote:
You can see however that I believe this girl was just not into it. So spend your time on other girls not this one. No reengages is gonna change that.
Yes, you keep repeating that conclusion about your belief that she was not into the guy no matter what, and I already asserted mostly why I disagree with you about that. We do not need to repeat ourselves more on this point.
Your second point about not reengaging is taking the situation to another level, and sounds as if you are just throwing out hypothetical gamer language just for the purpose of throwing it out there. When the guy fucks up that badly, he is going to have to come off with some fairly serious corrections if he wants to reengage. I personally believe that there could be ways for him to reengage, if he wanted to, and his advantage is that he already met her.. and the other point is that she is not necessarily opposed to him (despite your continued assertion of such presumed opposition).
Quote: (07-25-2016 03:10 PM)smashley Wrote:
I think what the girl was wondering about the appropriateness of her response was whether she came off as a bitch.
That may be true, and maybe even has a fairly high likelihood of being true.. but does it matter very much? In my thinking it mostly shows that she is potentially receptive to interacting with the guy.
Quote: (07-25-2016 03:10 PM)smashley Wrote:
Girls have this overwhelming fear of hurting a guys feelings. It's stupid, but thats how they are.
I doubt it. All non-psychotic people are concerned about how they interact with people for a variety of reasons.... and you seem to be getting on a tangent when you want to analyze in more detail than that.
Quote: (07-25-2016 03:10 PM)smashley Wrote:
She loved the attention of the approach, thats why she posted it most likely.
Most girls like attention, especially those who have blogs and who are posting about the attention that they have gotten.
Quote: (07-25-2016 03:10 PM)smashley Wrote:
Game and approach was not great. Just fine. Hope I can be clear on that again.
Yes, you keep repeating that unsubstantiated conclusion that seems to be a bit contrary to the actual facts, but you are entitled to your opinion.
Thanks man. Good to have discussion. Just wanted to share an interesting video I found to the others on the forum. Gives a different perspective of approach from the other side. Best of luck in the hunt. Have a good week.