[NoBalls]

I am making the assumption that the 40 year old man will be by himself when he goes out.

The main theme of this topic is where are the best places a 40 year old man can go to find women in their 20s to have a sexual affair with.

Here are the Venues I will start the discussion with.
1. Night Clubs
2. Dive Bars
3. Continuing Education Classes

Here are my opinions:
Night Clubs
The women at nightclubs are usually very young. The 40 year old man must not care if some women think he is an old pervert just for being there. He should hang around the bar and make conversation with women who come by. He should never go to the dance floor alone but it is okay to bring a girl to the dance floor. He should expect to be shot down a lot until he finds a hot girl who digs older men.

Dive Bars
A 40 year old man can probably fit in better age wise at dive bars. The main problem is that many dive bars are also neighborhood bars and everyone knows each other. I think the best course of action is to stake out a spot at the bar and wait for a girl to sit down nearby before initiating conversation.

[c]Continuing Education Classes[/c]
The advantage of continuing education classes is that starting conversations is easy. The drawback is that you have to sit quietly for long periods of time while the instructor shares his/her information. The man must select something he enjoys. The quality of women is very hit or miss.

[hydrogonian]

maybe http://www.meetup.com groups. I haven't been, but they seem like a logical answer being that you can choose your activity and you are put into a social situation where you will have extended talking time with the women. If you were thinking along the line of CEC's, then meetup.com groups are a far superior alternative to that strategy.

That 'forced' extended socializing time is crucial, and very 'American' in terms of people getting to know each other through groups. If you don't like one group, you can pick another. It seems to be superior to bars, for everything except alcohol and the ability to venue change on the spot. However, you can join groups that drink, as well.

I view nightclubs as having a very low ROI in terms of time and energy. Yeah, you can meet women and get laid, maybe. But the quality and frequency of that happening is largely out of your hands (due to decreased face time, imo, too many distractions), especially as an older gentleman. My take-down rate does up exponentially the more face-time I get with a woman outside of a crowded drinking venue.

Bars are marginally better than nightclubs, but I guess that depends on you. Look for speakeasy type establishments (yelp.com) as well as hotel bars. Both low key, and both draw the type of women that would be interested in a sophisticated older man for a fling (also, cougars).

Nice handle, btw. Is your inner game hurting? then I definably recommend staying away from bars and clubs as a primary strategy. You want social groups as a priority, with everything else coming second. Your confidence will go up as you talk with more women and begin to get laid. Then, cold approach environments will be less of a challenge.

[Riff Dog]

Night Club - If I were at a night club, I *would not* go out on the dance floor, even if a girl was begging me. Everybody there would then be looking at us and wondering , "Who's the old guy???" (I'm in my 40's.) I do want to maintain some dignity. FWIW, you see the Dos Equis "Most Interesting Man in the World" guy in nightclub settings with young women, but you don't see him dancing. That's because the ad agency knows how ridiculous that would make him look.

Dive Bar - I don't see a dive bar working out very well, especially if your strategy is to wait for a girl to sit nearby. (You're going to need to be a lot bolder than that.) I've tried dive bars when I travel out of town and it's a *huge* time suck. First, it takes a while to even scope out the scene and figure out which girls have boyfriends. (In a neighborhood bar, a girl's boyfriend might not actually be there, but his buddies are. Add alcohol to the mix and you don't wanna mess with that.) Second, girls who hang out at dive bars are even less sophisticated than their sober sisters. So as an older guy, it's going to really try your patience as you carry on dopey conversations with them. I'd skip the dive bars.

Continuing Education will probably waste less of your time than a dive bar and be less embarrassing than a night club. But like you say, it's gonna be hit or miss, because there will only be a set number of girls there and who knows whether you'd have a shot with them.

My advice would be forget all three of these and just do basic day game. Day game is far better for us elderly gents than night club game. You'll meet a lot more girls this way, since the girls you're looking for are at the supermarket or bookstore or the park or wherever. Hmmm, I wonder if anyone's written a book recently about day game . . . hmmmm . . .

Okay, forget the subtlety, here's Roosh's Day Bang book:

<EDIT> - Oops. Since I'm a newbie here, the software won't let me post a link. (Funny, I write a blog with a readership in the thousands, but I'm a "newbie." I understand, mind you, but I do get a chuckle out of it.) Anyway, click on the RooshV dot com link at the top of the page. Then click on his "Day Bang" book.

[el mechanico]

@ Riff, you are way off...loosen up a bit.
The easiest way for guys in their 40s to fuck young girls is to work with them. Get a fake job where there's a high turnover of young chicks at Dominoes or Burgerking or some other lame place.
If you want top notch get one as the dressingroom attendant at Hollister in the mall. LOL

[NoBalls]

(09-29-2011 01:23 PM)hydrogonian Wrote:  

Nice handle, btw. Is your inner game hurting? then I definably recommend staying away from bars and clubs as a primary strategy. You want social groups as a priority, with everything else coming second. Your confidence will go up as you talk with more women and begin to get laid. Then, cold approach environments will be less of a challenge.

I made up that handle in a moment when I was pissed off at myself but I really don't remember what in particular. I actually do several hundred cold approaches per year which is more than most men but not good enough to get really good.

I've had a few one night stands from women that I met at dive bars and my game totally sucks so I know they have potential.

I go out to bars and clubs a lot and most of the time I don't hook up. But over the past few years I got laid a few times a year and had countless makeouts so it's not so bad.

I'm in my late 30s now and I'm wondering if I should shift my strategy because of age. Earlier in the year I was making out with a 19 year old who didn't seem to care about my age. She continued making out with me after asking my age. But her friends took her away from me. Another girl in her mid 20s took me home from a nightclub but turned cold after she asked my age.

[thegmanifesto]

You guys are all way off.

When I am 40 +, I will be prowling the bars of high end restaurants.

That is the setting where your age, intelligence, Cash Flow, sophistication and worldliness with shine like the morning sun.

There are plenty of girls of all age groups there as well.

Just make sure you Lock The Place Down.

And when I say, "Lock The Place Down" I really mean Lock The Place Down.

[MikeCF]

How old does the 40 yo man look? One of my boys is 40. Looks 33 and pulls ass at night clubs.

I pass for 5-8 years younger than I am, avoiding smoking and sun damage. SPF moisturize daily, use those vitamin b and c serums, and when older, take a shot of botox on those thick forehead lines. hgh and test injections help, too.

so the premise is flawed, newbie.

I can tell you're a newb since you didn't post hotel bars. hotel bars is where young girls go specifically looking for older men. go to a big city, find a hotel bar, though sometimes "daddy" will need to "help" the girl out. not always, as more and more igrls have daddy issues. it's sometimes a consideration.

[MikeCF]

(09-29-2011 06:32 PM)thegmanifesto Wrote:  

You guys are all way off.

When I am 40 +, I will be prowling the bars of high end restaurants.

That is the setting where your age, intelligence, Cash Flow, sophistication and worldliness with shine like the morning sun.

There are plenty of girls of all age groups there as well.

Just make sure you Lock The Place Down.

And when I say, "Lock The Place Down" I really mean Lock The Place Down.

My #1 partner and I are going to buy a vineyard is the central coast when we're too old to be running "traditional" game.

[thegmanifesto]

MikeCF -

"hotel bars is where young girls go specifically looking for older men."

Dead on.

I should have said that in addition to "prowling the bars of high end restaurants".

I would also add the words "high end" to "hotel bars".

[MikeCF]

(09-29-2011 06:38 PM)thegmanifesto Wrote:  

MikeCF -

"hotel bars is where young girls go specifically looking for older men."

Dead on.

I should have said that in addition to "prowling the bars of high end restaurants".

I would also add the words "high end" to "hotel bars".

We're on the same page. Guys gotta think bigger.

That's why I tell guys to think about things like cash flow and crew. Game is about finding legit guys who are doing big things.

As I get older, my friends are owning and investing in restaurants, bars, and I'm going to get in on a vineyard. I like wine, anyway, so it'll be a fun hobby. Best of all, I just sit there and the girls come to me.

[hydrogonian]

Quote:

My #1 partner and I are going to buy a vineyard is the central coast when we're too old to be running "traditional" game.

Is this "#1 partner" the same 'hot asian" that gave you the BJ in the gay bar on the other thread? Your going to open a vinyard with him?

If your not gay, your making the gay jokes way too easy. Maybe your having an off night with the phrasing

I'm just kidding with you, but it is a little funny.

[PDX]

There's a whole spectrum of venue types in between "night club" and "dive bar".

Also, don't forget:

4. Dance Classes

[MikeCF]

(09-29-2011 07:03 PM)hydrogonian Wrote:  

Quote:

My #1 partner and I are going to buy a vineyard is the central coast when we're too old to be running "traditional" game.

Is this "#1 partner" the same 'hot asian" that gave you the BJ in the gay bar on the other thread? Your going to open a vinyard with him?

If your not gay, your making the gay jokes way too easy. Maybe your having an off night with the phrasing

I'm just kidding with you, but it is a little funny.

Your joke reminds of the time a bunch of guys in BJJ class were making gay jokes. "Yeah, because being in between another man's legs is straight," I noted.

You're following around and "congruence testing" a dude.

I'll leave it the to crowd to ponder which is more gay.

[Stitch]

(09-29-2011 07:15 PM)PDX Wrote:  

There's a whole spectrum of venue types in between "night club" and "dive bar".

Also, don't forget:

4. Dance Classes

Careful tho--regular dance classes often have a "this is not a meat market" vibe and pickup is discouraged. However, def. not the case for things like nightclub "salsa night" etc (which around here covers a large age range). Besides, it's fun.

'course, mileage will vary. I'm 40 and generally one of the youngest guys in the regular classes--and on the older side for nightclub classes.

[rudebwoy]

I like the last option, taking a night school course in the local university. I have done it and seems like a good environment to meet progressive people. I met one girl who turned out to be a single mom, sexy all the same.

Personally, I think you are being hard on yourself. I don't know many guys who makeout with 19 year old girls on a regular, also why do they need to know your age. If you don't look your age then you are fine, it is not like you are going to marry them.

[Riff Dog]

(09-29-2011 03:06 PM)el mechanico Wrote:  

@ Riff, you are way off...loosen up a bit.

I'm guessing that by "loosen up," you're referring to where I said I wouldn't go out on the dance floor at a nightclub?

Well, you *could* and certainly there are guys who do. But whether you know it or not, I guarantee people are pointing and saying, "What's that old guy doing out there?"

Mind you, there are all sorts of times where I don't care what people think. But this is one of those times where they'd be right, because there is indeed something comical about a 40 something guy out there on the dance floor trying to fit in by dancing to Soulja Boy.

Don't get me wrong, I'm all for the pursuit of tail. But not at "any cost." I'm no longer 20 years old and I no longer shout "Paaaar-teeeee!" when someone announces they're throwing a kegger. I'm all growed up now with money, respect and a certain amount of pride. I can get laid just as easily (if not more easily) than going the Peter Pan route.

Like I said, they show the Dos Equis guy in a nightclub surrounded by babes. But they don't show him on the dance floor. There's a reason for that.

[el mechanico]

(09-29-2011 09:01 PM)Riff Dog Wrote:  

(09-29-2011 03:06 PM)el mechanico Wrote:  

@ Riff, you are way off...loosen up a bit.

I'm guessing that by "loosen up," you're referring to where I said I wouldn't go out on the dance floor at a nightclub?

Well, you *could* and certainly there are guys who do. But whether you know it or not, I guarantee people are pointing and saying, "What's that old guy doing out there?"

Mind you, there are all sorts of times where I don't care what people think. But this is one of those times where they'd be right, because there is indeed something comical about a 40 something guy out there on the dance floor trying to fit in by dancing to Soulja Boy.

Don't get me wrong, I'm all for the pursuit of tail. But not at "any cost." I'm no longer 20 years old and I no longer shout "Paaaar-teeeee!" when someone announces they're throwing a kegger. I'm all growed up now with money, respect and a certain amount of pride. I can get laid just as easily (if not more easily) than going the Peter Pan route.

Like I said, they show the Dos Equis guy in a nightclub surrounded by babes. But they don't show him on the dance floor. There's a reason for that.

The dos equis guy is over 60 not 40. I will tell you if you're having fun and dance well its something you will never ever even think about. 60 is not the new 40. If you go out with that mindset you're halfway blown out before you see a young girl or the dance floor.

[speakeasy]

(06-02-1970 06:18 AM)Riff Dog Wrote:  

Like I said, they show the Dos Equis guy in a nightclub surrounded by babes. But they don't show him on the dance floor. There's a reason for that.

I think an older guy will have to dance salsa or tango or something more sophisticated. You can be any age and look cool dancing salsa. Especially if you really know your stuff. It's a dance that can take years to master so there's a big DHV element to it. Now an older guy bumping and grinding to 50 cent would look lame obviously.

[Samseau]

Quote:

Night Club - If I were at a night club, I *would not* go out on the dance floor, even if a girl was begging me. Everybody there would then be looking at us and wondering , "Who's the old guy???" (I'm in my 40's.) I do want to maintain some dignity. FWIW, you see the Dos Equis "Most Interesting Man in the World" guy in nightclub settings with young women, but you don't see him dancing. That's because the ad agency knows how ridiculous that would make him look.

It depends on the night club.

If it is a dope night club that plays original music and NOT top 40 trash, you'll be able to seduce girls on the floor as long as your hair isn't gray and you've got tight dance floor game. I've seen guys do it. You might not get 22 yr old girls but you'll be able to do 28 yr old girls.

speakeasy Wrote:

I think an older guy will have to dance salsa or tango or something more sophisticated. You can be any age and look cool dancing salsa.

Dude, imagine if you're a younger guy dancing sophisticated dances like that? Do you realize how good it makes you look?

[hydrogonian]

Quote:

Your joke reminds of the time a bunch of guys in BJJ class were making gay jokes. "Yeah, because being in between another man's legs is straight," I noted.

You're following around and "congruence testing" a dude.

I'll leave it the to crowd to ponder which is more gay.

Whats BJJ class? (seriously. it sounds pretty gay)
Whats congruence testing?

I think your a tad sensitive. I did mention that I was joking. And your phrasing was funny. And you did tell a story about being in a gay bar, in a thread entitled "gay bars", about getting a BJ from a "Hot Asian" for whom you didn't use a gender determiner. You deserve to have your balls broken for that. Sorry. And I'm a pretty nice guy. But that's too much. As a man, you get made fun of for stupid mistakes like that. Have you not joked around with other men before?

But Im "gay". You know what, you should ask people here about how gay that they think that I am, as per your suggestion. Direct them to your posts, ask them to compare what they know of me and you, and then ask. See what you come up with.

Following around? Actually, I posted int this thread before you. I'm the first responder to the OP.

Here's to taking a joke well and not taking oneself too seriously.

[OlympusSquared]

(09-29-2011 10:18 PM)hydrogonian Wrote:  

Quote:

Your joke reminds of the time a bunch of guys in BJJ class were making gay jokes. "Yeah, because being in between another man's legs is straight," I noted.

You're following around and "congruence testing" a dude.

I'll leave it the to crowd to ponder which is more gay.

Whats BJJ class? (seriously. it sounds pretty gay)
Whats congruence testing?

I think your a tad sensitive. I did mention that I was joking. And your phrasing was funny. And you did tell a story about being in a gay bar, in a thread entitled "gay bars", about getting a BJ from a "Hot Asian" for whom you didn't use a gender determiner. You deserve to have your balls broken for that. Sorry. And I'm a pretty nice guy. But that's too much. As a man, you get made fun of for stupid mistakes like that. Have you not joked around with other men before?

But Im "gay". You know what, you should ask people here about how gay that they think that I am, as per your suggestion. Direct them to your posts, ask them to compare what they know of me and you, and then ask. See what you come up with.

Following around? Actually, I posted int this thread before you. I'm the first responder to the OP.

Here's to taking a joke well and not taking oneself too seriously.

Brazillian Ju Jitsu. BJJ classes wouldn't be a good way to meet women, but it will get you in shape and could save your life if you get attacked by a knife (never know what'll happen if you get caught flirting with J-Bob's lady... ;-)

To the topic: Meetup.com. This seems like a gold mine for the 30 and up crowd, at least if your ok with meeting people in that age range.

I have a friend in his late 30's who does well with girls in their mid-late 20's. Personally, I'm fine with that age group. That's a girls prime as long as doesn't fall off completely. I'm 25 and really the fact of not banging 19 year olds is fine with me at my age, 23-28 is perfect to me.

[Stitch]

Quote:

I think an older guy will have to dance salsa or tango or something more sophisticated.

Or anything different. I took a girl who dances salsa very well to a ballroom event and taught her waltz, and she seemed pretty pleased with that...

[Riff Dog]

(09-29-2011 09:28 PM)speakeasy Wrote:  

(06-02-1970 06:18 AM)Riff Dog Wrote:  

Like I said, they show the Dos Equis guy in a nightclub surrounded by babes. But they don't show him on the dance floor. There's a reason for that.

I think an older guy will have to dance salsa or tango or something more sophisticated. You can be any age and look cool dancing salsa. Especially if you really know your stuff. It's a dance that can take years to master so there's a big DHV element to it. Now an older guy bumping and grinding to 50 cent would look lame obviously.

Absolutely. That would make you look cool as hell, no matter what the age of the girl you're with.

To be clear, my original point had more to do with the silliness of dancing to Jay-Z or Foo Fighters or any music that gets played in 90% of the nightclubs that would have high concentrations of girls in their 20's. Yeah, I'm sure guys succeed with this all time, so I'm not saying it won't work. It's just that for me personally, my pride won't let me go out there knowing half the people are thinking how desperate is it that a guy in his 40's is trying to convince a girl in her 20's that he's a hip dude by dancing to AutoTune pop. There are too many better options available to me.

By the way, I actually like 50 Cent and Jay-Z. If I were at some function with my wife and they were playing that stuff, I would happily get out on the floor and shake a leg.

[el mechanico]

(09-30-2011 11:33 AM)Riff Dog Wrote:  

(09-29-2011 09:28 PM)speakeasy Wrote:  

(06-02-1970 06:18 AM)Riff Dog Wrote:  

Like I said, they show the Dos Equis guy in a nightclub surrounded by babes. But they don't show him on the dance floor. There's a reason for that.

I think an older guy will have to dance salsa or tango or something more sophisticated. You can be any age and look cool dancing salsa. Especially if you really know your stuff. It's a dance that can take years to master so there's a big DHV element to it. Now an older guy bumping and grinding to 50 cent would look lame obviously.

Absolutely. That would make you look cool as hell, no matter what the age of the girl you're with.

To be clear, my original point had more to do with the silliness of dancing to Jay-Z or Foo Fighters or any music that gets played in 90% of the nightclubs that would have high concentrations of girls in their 20's. Yeah, I'm sure guys succeed with this all time, so I'm not saying it won't work. It's just that for me personally, my pride won't let me go out there knowing half the people are thinking how desperate is it that a guy in his 40's is trying to convince a girl in her 20's that he's a hip dude by dancing to AutoTune pop. There are too many better options available to me.

By the way, I actually like 50 Cent and Jay-Z. If I were at some function with my wife and they were playing that stuff, I would happily get out on the floor and shake a leg.

Why would you care what people think about you in a club? Those places are warzones.

[thegmanifesto]

(09-29-2011 09:28 PM)speakeasy Wrote:  

(06-02-1970 06:18 AM)Riff Dog Wrote:  

Like I said, they show the Dos Equis guy in a nightclub surrounded by babes. But they don't show him on the dance floor. There's a reason for that.

I think an older guy will have to dance salsa or tango or something more sophisticated. You can be any age and look cool dancing salsa. Especially if you really know your stuff. It's a dance that can take years to master so there's a big DHV element to it. Now an older guy bumping and grinding to 50 cent would look lame obviously.

Yeah, older cats can dance for sure.

I have been to more that a few dope weddings where an older cat completely cuts a rug and has the whole crowd going wild.

Here is the rule for older guy dancing:

Dance the classics.

Don't dance the "novelty" dances. (This means no, "Dougie" "Souljah Boy" "Macarena" "YMCA" or any crap from any point in time).

When that sh*t comes on, take a break and smoke a cigar. More style points if you do it indoors in a "no smoking" state. F*ck em. You are old, you are allowed to get away with sh*t like that.

More I think about it, this should be the rule for every guy.