[925 Silver]

I’m 41, in shape, and happy in most aspects of life.

Lets be honest I’m shite at game.

Five years ago I picked up my first book on it. First principles – focus on yourself, make yourself someone cool, interesting etc.

I was unhappy, depressed, not overweight but not ripped, in a shit relationship and a shit job and going nowhere.

I took the teachings to heart, I put the book down.

I improved my employment, I went from working a shit office job earning 20K a year, and I am now working offshore in Oil, I’ve made supervisor, 70plus K per year. Got that shit sorted, well, just about, I work one month on and one month off.

Make yourself more interesting?! OK! I have always been into extreme sports, I am now a competent snowboarder, a competent downhill skateboarder, I can surf (not great, but I surf), and have recently obtained my BPA A licence. I’m a qualified skydiver! I moved out of bricks and mortar and now live in a van and travel. My time off is spent travelling in the van, in the winter I’m in southern Europe surfing, skateboarding, snowboarding, skydiving, in summer I work volunteering on festival builds and partying.

Inner game. I was neglected as a kid and had issues as a result, confidence, self esteem, depression. I got a councillor and have largely sorted that side of things out.

I am not George Clooney, but I’m reasonable decent looking, having worked hard in the gym offshore and I’m in reasonable shape, and now also have some pretty impressive Ink by Buena Vista Tattoo Club. I have always dressed OK, kind of skater / punk / biker badboy style.

So on paper I’m pretty cool right? I look in the Mirror and I think I look OK, I think I have my shit together fairly – certainly compared to where I was 5 years ago - big time.

I read the books, I try and approach… I just seem to bomb.
I’m shite at obfuscation and teasing. I come across as boring despite knowing I’m not. Despite not being Beta – I’m a fucking Beta.

I’m red pill aware even if I feel it stuck in my throat and struggle to keep it down, I’m under no illusions about unicorns and how women are.

I’d just quite like to fuck some of them now and again.

So I went on a Bootcamp. I thought the instructors were weird creepy fuckers to be honest. So I didn’t get a lot out of it.

I like myself, I’m a fucking sound bloke, my life is where it should be, but I spent a lot of time alone due to how I live, and I could really use some help with my game and how I DHV without coming across as a twat.

Any help and advice would be well appreciated.

Cheers.

[Myname]

You sound a lot like me, I’m in my late 30s and into a lot of the same things- travel, boardsports, even took a bootcamp.

But if you bring up skydiving or something (especially early) you look try-hard. To DHV, I think work on body language and eye contact, passing shit tests, and teasing.
Later on in convo if you’re getting to know each other you have interesting stories.

I am naturally introverted but one thing I learned to think of things to say is an exercise where you pick any word and talk about it for at least a minute in any way you can- for example: Vacuum cleaners: “My buddy had this dog that wasn’t afraid of anything, but if it heard a vaccuum cleaner it would run off and hide... I wonder if they make vacuums that don’t scare dogs?..” anything, don’t worry if it sucks just get your mind working when you’re driving or whatever.
DHV by carrying on a fun conversation.Tease her and throw in open ended questions to get her talking, then branch off of what she says.

Then change locations - for example bar-walk at the park or to somewhere else. touch her- like playfully tap her shoulder or guide her in the direction with a hand on her lower back, spin her around like dancing, just innocent playful stuff- if she touches you back it’s a good sign. then after you talked take her to show her something like pictures from your trip or something you talked about at your van and gauge if she’s into it.

Anyway, hope some of this is useful, good luck.