[birthday cat]

I've known guys who are extremely efficient at closing who do the "no kiss until we're at my place" routine so I know it can work very well but there are other factors involved and a guy's game has to be congruent with her personality.

For example, a guy is attractive, masculine, gives off a little bit of a player vibe. He doesn't kiss or even touch until they get back to his place. They have a drink and listen to a few songs and he still doesn't touch or kiss her. Then he moves in for the kill and five minutes later they are banging. This works for that guy because the girl was expecting him to move fast and he built up a lot of sexual tension.

That style might never work for a guy who is less attractive, masculine, intense, etc. Girls get "creeped out" all the time by guys who have no game and wait forever to escalate but then go for everything quickly when they finally start to touch and kiss. The player's technique isn't that much different but everything else about him is different especially the confident and masculine vibe which helps create the sexual tension.

[puckerman]

This is a great thread. How did I miss this thread? Thanks for all the good stuff.

[Mufasa]

Awesome thread. This is on spot for the exact type of game I run. As for your last two points I've experienced the same hang ups and heres how I resolved them. They're in a thread some where on here on turning one night stands into recurring lays...

(05-12-2017 02:27 PM)James Bond Next level Wrote:  

Some areas I'm still experimenting
1)I'm not sure about how much to connect with the girl. These days I'm more looking for dates and regular girl so I don't aim for same night lays. Even if I induce extreme sexual tension, I still got lots of flakes. Maybe it's because I'm not really a "real person" in her mind, just fun for the night (bang or not) and should reveal more about me?

On point one you are dead on. You are not a "real" person in her mind. you are a fleeting burst of passion; mr tonight/today and gone tomorrow. People need balance and if you are mr intense they are going to need a reprieve--this typically is a flake aka buyers remorse...except you didn't even get the lay.

You have to go for the same night lays.

You've got her buying temperature at its highest point quickly, in the moment she doesnt realize this but the next day she WILL feel slutty about craving you.
Additionally she has accepted your frame and when you all the sudden don't fuck her your frame is now a lie--that shit scares girls off too.
After the bang always tell her y'all are going to get breakfast or that you will make it for her. Spend time teasing her in bed in the morning.

Quote:

should reveal more about me?

No that is the ultimate frame destroyer. Cuddle with her kiss her forehead and tease her. Remember you are trying to get to her feelings not her logic. In my experience most women are narcissistic ass hats and don't give a shit about you--they just want to feel unless its something lavish.

But a fundamental rule here is if you chose to do something do it because its what you do. Something that may be weakass--like cuddling--can be alpha if you approach it from a position of strength.

Quote:

It's hard to get consistent to get in the zone: I manage it sometime and feel like the king, the rest I feel annoyed or my game is too flat

There is a high chance that you are not as "intense" as you think. I'm not saying your shit doesnt work because I know first hand it does--what I'm saying is that your skills may not line up with who you are holistically. Like a samarai being asked to fight with boxing gloves.

We are who we are.

If you're only using this as a front when talking to girls then it will never be as effective as it can be. Women can be fooled but they got the 'XX'es. double dose of intuition and they will smell your bullshit eventually...

You have to live this way.

The fact that you have to turn it on may mean that you may be better suited for a different type of game or dialing back in some areas so that it is more congruent with who you are outside of your love life.
OR
Start acting like an intense person outside of your love life until it becomes holistic. Perfect practice makes perfect.

[Mufasa]

(10-20-2017 09:20 AM)James Bond Next level Wrote:  

Context
Intense game is great, but if you want her too much (you really want her to be your FWB because your harem collapsed or simply she is a quality girl with serious potential), I have a tendency to keep putting energy and attraction material to turn her on. The result is of course that i lose her. Simply said I do give too much fuck. It's easy to be detached when it's just an easy girl, but if I put a hot traditional & feminine girl in front of you, I'm sure I'm not the only one whose a bit too much interested.

Ghost & flame concept
It's a term used by Mystery in revelations, it is the 2 sides one must have to completely attract a girl. The flame is basically passion : it's when you shine, you joke, you kino, you hold deep eye contact, etc. For intense guys, it's probably already natural. The Ghost however is what we lack : it's basically the "I don't give a fuck attitude". So let's focus on that.

How to be a ghost (not just for halloween)
As we said, the ghost is being a bit disinterested, having other things in mind. The big mistake when doing it is to convey it in a rude manner. It should not feel like a punishment for the girl, but rather as something that is naturally part of our behaviour, hence the importance of doing it soon in our interaction with the girl.
Some specific ways of doing it include:
-Arriving late at a date (5-10min in enough or it will get in the rude zone)
-being a bit unreactive
-No kino/kiss all the time
-Being unavailable certain days ("I'm seeing that friend" or "I'm a bit sick") and you don't see her a lot in the beginning of the relationship (serious or not)
-don't text her too much. Often, she has to wait several hours for an answer from you
-Not taking things too negatively : it's no big deal
-Conveying that you can walk away at all time : you are not owned and you have certain standards for yourself. If she can't meet it, you do walk away but not to punish her but rather to find what is good for you

In my execution I agree with most of this. But as said above its got to be congruent. Going from mr kissy one day to no kissing is and incongruent frame...unless thats your actual behavior.

I've found that the ghost is most effective not in person. Basically you have to behave like a hot chick. Don't text back for days, persue other leads for days/weeks without contacting her. Being non needy (abundance mentality). You pull it all away when not in person and when in person you hit her with a two piece and a biscuit. Its basically one big game of keeping her off balance--If you fucked her right and really worked the flame then the ghost will be super effective.

A weird trick about all of this is how "real" and "honest" your ghost is. I swear girls can sense this. When you are actually not responding because you are busy and whatever it works better than faking it--maybe I'm tripping and I just don't realize that I'm not actively counting down time until I can shoot her a message idk...

Another thing that works well for me over texting is after a multiple day ghost and the girl reaches out I'm instantly responding to her messages (I'm actually free) and then I get busy and my responses become sporadic until I eventually forget. Randomly I suggest a date idea and boom you're in.

In closing know that why you are not responding to her shit you are making room for another dude to slide in and close you out.

(11-08-2017 02:00 PM)birthday cat Wrote:  

Intense guys may not be the best fit for online game. I think online game is probably beter for someone who is calm and systematic. Many girls will waste your time without ever having any real interest and that will piss off the intense guy too much.

Completely agree. They strengths of an intense dude never translate well because our strength is in non verbal communication. Good practice on conveying intense feelings comes from telling her what to feel--like 50 shades of grey. The author was able to do with words what we do non verbally.

[James Bond Next level]

Hello again fellow intense people. Today I wanna gather my thoughts and share an important concept: multi-level communication (credit richard la ruina). It is incredibly useful and helped me many times.

What is multi-level communication

A girl has 2 sides :
-a good girl side who want nice conversation, romance, taking her time, etc
-a bad girl side who wanna be crazy, have sex with a guy she just met, do things she isn't supposed to do

At all time, she behaves like a balance of her good girl and bad girl parts.

When you are too overtly sexual with a girl, her good girl part will be triggered and she will back off because she doesn't wanna feel like a slut (even if she is). It's the typical anti slut defense. So to avoid that and still be able to move things forward really quickly, we can use multi-level communication.
The principle is to have a verbal communication that is flat, to satisfy her good girl part, and a non-verbal communication (kino) that is escalating quite high to satisfy her bad girl part.

Personal experience
The most extreme experience I had related to this subject was the time I met this australian girl in a club. She was a tourist and we met less an hour ago. I isolated her on a couch and was asking very boring questions: "do you like the city", "what did you see", etc. At the same time, my hand was getting higher and higher her thighs. Since there was no resistance and she wore a dress, I started rubbing her panties and then fingering her. 15min later, we were banging at my place.
A key thing here is to escalate from 0 to 100, not start at 60. Besides, my face appeared on purpose almost serious, so that other people won't notice us. Girls are so wet when they can be super sexual with us while nobody else notice.

When I started game, I wanted to sexualize the conversations during dates as much as possible. Now, since I got too much of a player vibe and create naturally a lot of tension, I focus on showing vulnerability, creating comfort while escalating. Maybe hint on future dates so that the girl knows I want to see her again. It's better like that.

[Noir]

Good observation.

This is what we preach with indirect verbals, direct non-verbals and it's the key of making it 'just happen' with girls.

I don't sexualize conversations pre-bang but rather behave in a sexual manner.

Any form of verbal sexualizing is done in the form of fantasy projection and a frame of 'us vs the world' where the roles are defined as me being her guide to having uninhibited fun under my protection. She is my new experience, untainted and ready for an adventure.

(age doesn't matter, I have done this with 24 year old strippers, 43 year old MILFs and anything other woman on the spectrum).

You plant the seeds for their fantasies to go wild and these fantasies are directed by your touching, body language and vocal tonality.

You lower your voice and bring her in.
You do 'triangular gazing' -as it was known- and intently look into her eyes (soul!) and communicate your sexuality.
She mirrors your sexual body language and breathing.

You break the tension and are playful, pushing her away and then when she is on the cusp of playfulness, you take that energy and turn that into the sexual energy. You sweep her off her feet and are unpredictable; she is moistening.

You are in control of the interaction this way and don't behave like a horny teenager with your verbals. They have their time and place.

As you notice the sexual tension build up, you escalate further and this is where I drop my direct lines.

Kissing is optional, for some it's reserved for back at your place and for others, it's a feedback mechanism to know where they are in the totem pole leading to sexual delight.

I will throw out a "You don't even know what I would do to you right now".

Let her mind fill in the gaps; it's -her- fantasy.

From the get go, I am communicating this.

The other day, I saw a girl checking me out and I literally looked at her from head to toe and met her glance. Funnily, I knew her (but didn't recognize her from a distance) and she smiled and blushed as she said hi.

I didn't respond (I was imagining her naked and too caught up in the thought to even want to say hello) and later on her friend was messaging me telling me she saw me and that next time I should say hello.

It's little shit like this that gets women talking and thinking about you.

This is also where mystery is formed.

For all the lack of logic we lament in women, they are pretty logical when the conversation is sexual without your presence being sexual.
You haven't activated their emotional, daydream side and this is where a lot of guys end up being creepy, needy or thirsty.

Direct the energy accordingly.

[456]

Pro thread... this jives very much with my experiences, and is pretty much why I don't use online game -- I'm okay having fewer leads in the outer part of my pipeline: because once I get them alone, it's on if there's any chemistry. (And if there isn't, I don't want it anyway).

Getting feedback like "I didn't think you were my type at first" is thrilling -- that's the power of converting a maybe girl through sheer force of personality.

With the yes girls, it's just the confidence of knowing you can close this, and then taking some liberties and having FUN with it, which is a positive feedback cycle.

The "triangle look" (eyes and mouth), the "wall theatrics" (kissing against wall), the "build up and stop short", all of the variations -- these have been discussed on many threads in isolation, but I think taken together, we get the "intense" game.

I dig the anecdote about "keeping face / convo very above board, but sliding my hand further up her thigh, she's in on it and nobody knows" -- that dynamic rings very true. It's also a great way to spice up things with an existing girl.

I find myself fairly intense with guys and all kinds of folks as well - so perhaps this isn't just a mode one goes into, but a way of life.

Equal parts brutal honesty and empathetic social tact, a dash of storyteller (the us vs. the world dynamic), a bunch of positive vibes elixir, and obviously a vast undercurrent of honest lust for the girl (i.e. "speaks to my DNA" and not "ehh, would maybe bang").

[GreenManaleshi]

One woman's "intense" is another woman's "asshole" but yea, I've spent my entire adult life learning to be less blunt, more chill, and less polarizing. People who have no strong opinions or preferences about any topics really annoy me.

Ive had numerous conversations with women ( and a few guys) like this over the years: "What's your favorite song?.. "Oh I dunno" Well then what's some of your favorite bands? .. I like a lot of stuff.." "Like who then?" "Oh.. you know.. just stuff I hear on the radio, not sure of their name" WTF??

This sort of pattern goes for movies, TV, political opinions, sports, hobbies, you name it. For fuck's sake ladies, please acquire a personality. Tits alone are not enough after age 25.

What I grew up with as "debate" a lot of people read as "arguing" Voicing a strong opinion can come across as obnoxious or aggressive, even by other men. Quick way to get despised in a liberal enclave is to be proudly pro American exceptionalism, pro hetero, pro capitalist, etc. Lotta chicks and lesbians in college straight up hated me - conservative white male who represented everything they hated. California really is like an alien universe compared to Oklahoma and Texas. I could never hide my true personality and beliefs, unlike some of my more strategic friends.

I know this wasn't exactly escalation related, but the "intense" thing bleeds into so many social arenas and is linked, I think, to testosterone.

[456]

Try channeling the intensity on your own cool stories, the [positive and maybe creative] things you are passionate about.

If you are channeling intensity into political or cultural stuff, that may steer things off the escalation path. (Unless it's a specific kind of nerdy girl who is turned on by that, or if she's just turned on by intense dialogue / "debate", which is kind of rare but does exist).

I also have some intense feelings about not-so-romantic subjects, so sometimes I just filter all of that stuff out and pretend none of it exists. So the only stuff left to talk about, is worth being intense about.

[Noir]

You can replace intense topics with joking, playful ones. Just teasing.

Direct push, non-direct (non-verbal) pulls with the body language etc. described above.

Women usually aren't used to such conversations so you will end up disappointed if relying solely on that.

When they can't handle such conversations, hit them with the cocky/funny and touch, invade personal space and communicate sexually through your body.

"Oh! Stuff! They're the best, my favourite is Unknown Artist" blabla

[godfather dust]

I'm fucking crazy. Diagnosed as bipolar, I think I was just doing too much drugs but some aspects apply. My game life ranges from running through 10 girls in a summer to 3 month dry spells.

I'll try to come up with some examples:

I banged a 19 year old Asian 7 with the approach starting from me yelling at her and throwing my arms up from 50 feet across the street.

I fucked a girl in potentially criminal rough sex, including me opening up pornos on her back hitting it doggy (it was on a friend's bed, they were next to it.) She wouldn't quit calling for almost a year.

In all my relationships I pull scumbag shit like ghosting a week. They love/hate it.

But yeah being intense I'm either on or off. I'm working on mellowing out.

[James Bond Next level]

Hello again fellow intense guys. How do you all do with girls you find cute but no more? As in a girl you would bang but aren't that invested into it. Some guys, when he's not that into the girl, makes the girl want him like crazy. For me it makes the girl in the end disinterested into me. As a result, I'm in a big of a dry spell as I don't find available girls of the quality I want (I do still approach a lot) and it doesn't really hook with "just" cute girls.
Should I focus on quality only or tweak my game with 7s (make her work more to win my affection maybe) ? Cause a 7 as a plate would be nice...