You sound overly invested in this girl. Where are the other 5 chicks you are texting with? Abundance, bro.
From heaven to hell in split seconds
Quote: (04-24-2017 02:33 PM)EmotionalGeek Wrote:
I think I did following errors:
1. Poor eye contact
2. Poor kino
3. I was not leading at the moments I felt like she was leading.
4. At the end I tried to be persistent but maybe I was a bit needy.
I do not understand this sudden lost of interest when she seemed very receptive and into me for like 5 hours and need some explanation. I feel wrecked today and have very ill humor. I want to avoid similar situations in the future.
1 You just listed the 4 reasons of sudden lost of interest, you do understand much more than you think.
2 Why do you feel wrecked? Dont you see the beauty in it? You can advance, self-develop, learn from your errors. Basically your fckin destiny is in your hands. Next girl you will be a bit better. Its a constant loop of progress. You should be THRILLED that its basically a game with infinite respawn
Quote: (06-03-2017 01:25 PM)HD668B Wrote:
Quote: (04-24-2017 02:33 PM)EmotionalGeek Wrote:
I think I did following errors:
1. Poor eye contact
2. Poor kino
3. I was not leading at the moments I felt like she was leading.
4. At the end I tried to be persistent but maybe I was a bit needy.
I do not understand this sudden lost of interest when she seemed very receptive and into me for like 5 hours and need some explanation. I feel wrecked today and have very ill humor. I want to avoid similar situations in the future.
1 You just listed the 4 reasons of sudden lost of interest, you do understand much more than you think.
2 Why do you feel wrecked? Dont you see the beauty in it? You can advance, self-develop, learn from your errors. Basically your fckin destiny is in your hands. Next girl you will be a bit better. Its a constant loop of progress. You should be THRILLED that its basically a game with infinite respawn
This. From the sounds of it you haven't really swallowed the red pilll. Start there. It's tough road, but practice makes perfect.
I don't just want what I want. I want it, in the way that I want it.
I Just wanted to let you know that this girl is regular in same club that I'm. I see her glimpsing at me sometimes, her friend do the same and I sometimes look at her -- she is really pretty after all. But I don't try to talk wit her she sees me picking up other girls and I see her picking up other guys
You were way too needy, and kind of a pussy about the entire situation.
First off, you talked for hours? Way too much talking. Are you trying to be her girlfriend or her lover? "I was really into her because of her character not looks and I really felt like we were soul mates. I was convinced she felt the same." Women don't want to fuck their "soulmate", a person who is just like them. They want to fuck a masculine man who is better than them. When you go that route, you become her girlfriend, not her lover. (Do you know how many times I've seen women exchange cat pictures with male friends while they're naked in my bed? Too many.)
Second, if you're not going to get the bang that night, you should always be the one to end the interaction. Make her worried that she's not going to get your number. "Babe, nice meeting you tonight, but I gotta get rolling. Big bank to rob tomorrow." Don't ask for her number, and see if she tries to keep the interaction going. If she's like "Stick around for a few minutes" say "I really can't, but hand me your phone." Then put your number in her phone as like "Johnny Hot Stuff" or something funny. If she's into you, you'll get a text within about 10 - 15 minutes later. It never fails. Then line up a date. (Also, if you say you're going to end the interaction, end it. If she's like "stick around for a few more minutes!" and you do, your frame is shot. It's a huge DHV to say you have something more important to do than spend more time with her.)
Third, big picture wise... it's easy to steal defeat from the jaws of victory. You did that by talking too much. I've been using this video way too much lately, but scroll to 3:00 -
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Zckciw8lD1k
At first you were Mr. Mysterious, sipping on your whiskey, content to ignore her. Five hours later, and after way too much conversation, you're just a regular guy and even seem a little bit insecure. Your chances of hooking up with her were better in the first 20 minutes than the 5th hour.
Eventually the more hot girls you bang, (and ironically, the more you're rejected by), the better your calibration becomes. You want to be bold, but not needy. You want to interact with her, but not come off as "common". You want to game her, but not over-game her.
This is all learned through trial and error.
First off, you talked for hours? Way too much talking. Are you trying to be her girlfriend or her lover? "I was really into her because of her character not looks and I really felt like we were soul mates. I was convinced she felt the same." Women don't want to fuck their "soulmate", a person who is just like them. They want to fuck a masculine man who is better than them. When you go that route, you become her girlfriend, not her lover. (Do you know how many times I've seen women exchange cat pictures with male friends while they're naked in my bed? Too many.)
Second, if you're not going to get the bang that night, you should always be the one to end the interaction. Make her worried that she's not going to get your number. "Babe, nice meeting you tonight, but I gotta get rolling. Big bank to rob tomorrow." Don't ask for her number, and see if she tries to keep the interaction going. If she's like "Stick around for a few minutes" say "I really can't, but hand me your phone." Then put your number in her phone as like "Johnny Hot Stuff" or something funny. If she's into you, you'll get a text within about 10 - 15 minutes later. It never fails. Then line up a date. (Also, if you say you're going to end the interaction, end it. If she's like "stick around for a few more minutes!" and you do, your frame is shot. It's a huge DHV to say you have something more important to do than spend more time with her.)
Third, big picture wise... it's easy to steal defeat from the jaws of victory. You did that by talking too much. I've been using this video way too much lately, but scroll to 3:00 -
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Zckciw8lD1k
At first you were Mr. Mysterious, sipping on your whiskey, content to ignore her. Five hours later, and after way too much conversation, you're just a regular guy and even seem a little bit insecure. Your chances of hooking up with her were better in the first 20 minutes than the 5th hour.
Eventually the more hot girls you bang, (and ironically, the more you're rejected by), the better your calibration becomes. You want to be bold, but not needy. You want to interact with her, but not come off as "common". You want to game her, but not over-game her.
This is all learned through trial and error.
Her game level was more valuable for your brain than her pussy.
You didn't do anything wrong, play on.
You didn't do anything wrong, play on.
Nothing wrong with building a connection (in fact it helps with most girls), but you need to remember to escalate.
OP’s name is accurate.
Tone down the emotion.
Tone down the emotion.
YoungBlade's HEMA Datasheet
Tabletop Role-playing Games
Barefoot walking (earthing) datasheet
Occult/Wicca/Pagan Girls Datasheet
Havamal 77
Cows die,
family die,
you will die the same way.
I know only one thing
that never dies:
the reputation of the one who's died.
I felt that "we were soulmates" vibe the other day with a girl I was talking to. At this point I know not to assign any meaning to it.
It's just something *you* feel, like fishing out on the river all day and finally getting a good bite on the hook. This is it! You got one hooked!! The urge to reel that little fucker in is strong because you've done it before and you know you have what it takes but you gotta calm down and play it right.
Your fish that night had been nibbling at hooks all evening now you're just letting it sidle up to the boat and feeding it all your bait, hoping it'll jump into the boat out of gratitude. Then, you're all surprised when it doesn't text you the next day and say "come catch me!"
C'mon, homie.
Stuff I thought you did wrong:
texted her that night
texted her next day
talked to her for five hours then let her break off the interaction (probably trapping her at the bar with your nice guy "frame")
probably texted her something cutesy instead of "hey"
Leaning back and letting the chips fall is something I'm trying to work on too. You can't pull on the line too much but you can't let it run out all the way either.
It's just something *you* feel, like fishing out on the river all day and finally getting a good bite on the hook. This is it! You got one hooked!! The urge to reel that little fucker in is strong because you've done it before and you know you have what it takes but you gotta calm down and play it right.
Your fish that night had been nibbling at hooks all evening now you're just letting it sidle up to the boat and feeding it all your bait, hoping it'll jump into the boat out of gratitude. Then, you're all surprised when it doesn't text you the next day and say "come catch me!"
C'mon, homie.
Stuff I thought you did wrong:
texted her that night
texted her next day
talked to her for five hours then let her break off the interaction (probably trapping her at the bar with your nice guy "frame")
probably texted her something cutesy instead of "hey"
Leaning back and letting the chips fall is something I'm trying to work on too. You can't pull on the line too much but you can't let it run out all the way either.
Per Ardua Ad Astra | "I have come here to chew bubblegum and kick ass. And I'm all out of bubblegum"
Cobra and I did some awesome podcasts with awesome fellow members.
For later readers/noobs:
"I do not understand this sudden lost of interest when she seemed very receptive and into me for like 5 hours"
Aside from the obvious holes in the man's game that he himself has outlined, the bigger message here is don't waste mental energy trying to figure out any "sudden loss of interest." A girl's interest in you can flip in a matter of minutes, when she sobers up/has another drink, gets a text from her ex or a hotter guy, chitchats with her friends, has an argument with someone, remembers an argument she had earlier in the week...female emotion is not a stable flywheel. That's a critical part of the game to accept, if you don't come to terms with it you will drive yourself nuts asking those kinds of questions, "why did she do *thing* if she wasn't interested?"
Viewing it like a deposit account - "well she was X interested at this point so why is she X/2 or less interested a little while later" - is not a functional mindset.
"I do not understand this sudden lost of interest when she seemed very receptive and into me for like 5 hours"
Aside from the obvious holes in the man's game that he himself has outlined, the bigger message here is don't waste mental energy trying to figure out any "sudden loss of interest." A girl's interest in you can flip in a matter of minutes, when she sobers up/has another drink, gets a text from her ex or a hotter guy, chitchats with her friends, has an argument with someone, remembers an argument she had earlier in the week...female emotion is not a stable flywheel. That's a critical part of the game to accept, if you don't come to terms with it you will drive yourself nuts asking those kinds of questions, "why did she do *thing* if she wasn't interested?"
Viewing it like a deposit account - "well she was X interested at this point so why is she X/2 or less interested a little while later" - is not a functional mindset.
Quote: (12-24-2017 12:24 AM)BadgerHut Wrote:
For later readers/noobs:
"I do not understand this sudden lost of interest when she seemed very receptive and into me for like 5 hours"
Aside from the obvious holes in the man's game that he himself has outlined, the bigger message here is don't waste mental energy trying to figure out any "sudden loss of interest." A girl's interest in you can flip in a matter of minutes, when she sobers up/has another drink, gets a text from her ex or a hotter guy, chitchats with her friends, has an argument with someone, remembers an argument she had earlier in the week...female emotion is not a stable flywheel. That's a critical part of the game to accept, if you don't come to terms with it you will drive yourself nuts asking those kinds of questions, "why did she do *thing* if she wasn't interested?"
Viewing it like a deposit account - "well she was X interested at this point so why is she X/2 or less interested a little while later" - is not a functional mindset.
Honestly that's super helpful. I was actually confused when I instadated a girl and had a relatively positive interaction and rapport. Then suddenly she blocked me from everything and I was left scratching my head wondering what the hell happened. To me my thought process was it would make sense if I did something wrong but I genuinely combed through everything I did and couldn't spot an obvious mistake.
« Next Oldest | Next Newest »
Users browsing this thread: 1 Guest(s)