Speak the truth brotha ...
Team Nachos
Quote: (08-25-2011 11:06 AM)Moma Wrote:
Because, my dear comrade, values regarding marriage in North America are not the same as they are in other countries.
People here marry for fantasy reason and they get divorced at the first sign of turbulence.
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Since it is indeed a business, then every business arrangement entered should have some safety nets in place to protect whoever's investments are at risk.
In North America, it seems the man has the most at stake to lose (money wise).
Quote: (08-26-2011 03:21 PM)Pusscrook Wrote:
Quote: (08-25-2011 11:35 PM)ersatz Wrote:
As far as I know, America doesn't have common law marriage like Canada where if you live together for two+ years and act like a couple, your common law married and could be on the hook for alimony, but split things up like roommates (I don't know the full reality although). I've heard in America, to be married you explicitly have to fill out some paper work and get a marriage 'license' and you don't have things like common law marriage. If that is really the case, then I'm totally fine having a wedding, getting the rings, calling each other husband and wife, etc, but I will never, never sign that marriage license. For most girls, that is what they want anyway. The family, the marriage, the rings. "I'll get married to you dear, but I don't want to marry the government too". Divorce and family court generally is a travesty and is what brings most of the pain into divorce. I would make sure that all of the parents give their thumbs up to the marriage, since I don't want to deal with in-law bullshit and she'll have to pass a lot of tests of character to even consider having children.
Each state is different when it comes to common law. In your opinion do you think that because the parents gave a thumbs up to the marriage, that they will somehow be less cantankerous with you if there's a divorce in the works? Once she gets thru concocting the most elaborate tale of abuse, neglect ,and irreconcilable differences , their favorite son -in-law will be regarded as nothing more than a leper. Your children will think you're the devil.
Quote: (08-26-2011 10:53 PM)oldnemesis Wrote:
@Parlay44, to have a business you can not just survive on but also skim some reasonable cash from is definitely out of the reality for the majority of the people. Problems with off-shore bank accounts come with limited access, IRS reporting requirements and possible penalties, so it is not panacea as well. If you skim large amounts, it is traceable quite easily, and for amounts like $5K a year it is not really worth the hassle.
My main question, however, is still unanswered. Marriage is basically a business contract between two of you, which has specific terms. Why even bother to enter the contract if you want to cheat your partner from the beginning?
Quote: (08-27-2011 12:46 AM)oldnemesis Wrote:
This is the case because a lot of men marry down resource-wise. I.e. you enter into the business agreement when you bring 90% of income and another side brings 10%, nevertheless the agreement states that the whole income is split 50/50. Now when it looks like that, you'd ask why would a sane person enter an agreement like that? But they do, and then they complain that they got "screwed" by the justice system - while in fact they just screwed themselves. And I have no sympathy for them.
It more and more looks to me that Western guys have some kind of "marriage fetish".
Quote: (08-27-2011 06:40 PM)UrbanNerd Wrote:
IF YOU LIVE IN NORTH AMERICA AND YOU MARRY A WOMAN WHO BRINGS IN ONLY 10% OF YOUR INCOME, YOU ARE A 100% TOTAL FOOL!
Quote: (08-28-2011 04:53 PM)oldnemesis Wrote:
Quote: (08-27-2011 06:40 PM)UrbanNerd Wrote:
IF YOU LIVE IN NORTH AMERICA AND YOU MARRY A WOMAN WHO BRINGS IN ONLY 10% OF YOUR INCOME, YOU ARE A 100% TOTAL FOOL!
I wouldn't go as far as calling it total fool, but indeed the dude must understand what he is doing and why. In most cases it is trading of value (i.e. marrying a chick who is much younger or much more attractive). And, of course, when one accepted such value trade, then any complains about how "unfair" the court system is are just stupid. However it worked well for Donald Trump, so this is definitely an option.
Quote: (09-04-2011 07:41 PM)MrLemon Wrote:
I have a different perspective. In my experience, women who make 80% of their husbands salaries are much more likely to divorce because they have "independent income". Then they lose their jobs, or the man loses his job, and the divorce turns into a financial calamity with kids as victims.
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Women who make *more* than their husbands paycheck will *always* divorce...usually at the time when the man is really starting to enjoy raising his kids.
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My solution is, my wife knows very well that she can't survive on her own, and I don't make anywhere near enough to support both of us independently. So we are incentivized to stick it out, for pure survival reasons.
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Note that our country is going into a Depression which means, divorced families, unless they are rich, will end up living in their car and eating at the food bank (have seen this happen several time in our neighborhood). Depression, suicides, homelessness...all on the rise, and divorce is the top of the list of reasons.
Quote: (09-05-2011 08:15 AM)el mechanico Wrote:
"I've actually read that divorce rates are actually significantly lower now because of bad economy - people cannot find work, house value went down and it doesn't sell, etc."
Im noticing this a lot lately.I was out with two girls this weekend and one was married and told me she wont have sex with her husband because the A/C is broken in the house .She said his solution was putting a window unit in the living room so they could sleep in there.
I told her that my friend could fix her A/C and she said NO! why do I have to take care of it? "Thats what Im talking about! Why do I have to? Its his job"
She said she hates him but they can't afford to break up.
This is a far cry from the Who can Steal all the cash from the equitly line of a few years ago.
Quote: (09-05-2011 08:46 PM)Sushifan Wrote:
You young padawans have much to learn.
It does not matter where you got married (which state, which country, etc). It only matters where you now live and where she files for divorce.
There is no such thing as an iron-clad pre-nup. You cannot make a pre-nup that is considered too strict or punitive. For example, you make $500k per year and she makes $20k a year and if you split up (no kids involved, married for 5 years let's say) you expect her to walk away with zero, right? That will never happen. You will be required to have some sort of walk away $ ("consideration") for her in the pre-nup.
Also, you can't choose a wedding date until AFTER a pre-nup is signed lest she say that she signed under duress since the wedding date was approaching and she didn't want to be embarrassed in front of friends and family. Also she must have her own attorney represent her in the pre-nup and he will tell her not to sign something too restrictive.
Finally once you have both agreed and signed the pre-nup and you're married... The pre-nup can still be thrown out by a family court judge!
And anything related to kids (custody, time split, child support $) cannot be put into a pre-nup!
You kids need to visit an attorney or at least do better google searches...
Quote: (09-05-2011 08:46 PM)Sushifan Wrote:
Finally once you have both agreed and signed the pre-nup and you're married... The pre-nup can still be thrown out by a family court judge!
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Seems the safest course would be to avoid marriage altogether.
Quote: (09-05-2011 09:23 PM)Pusscrook Wrote:
This is common knowledge, why do we need to google any of this?
Quote: (09-05-2011 09:40 PM)Parlay44 Wrote:
Even the sweetest girls will do a 180 on you once a kid is involved.
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She did a unsuccessful stint in rehab before we split and found out that about half of the women there were nurses.
Quote: (09-06-2011 12:47 AM)rockdaspot Wrote:
is there anything stopping one from pre nupping and wifeing hot whores from various countries I want to visit or live in every few years or so?
is divorce expensive / difficult?
if there's not many negatives I wouldn't mind wifing a hot whore for a year and then discarding her after that.
Quote: (09-06-2011 05:51 AM)guey Wrote:
Quote: (09-06-2011 12:47 AM)rockdaspot Wrote:
is there anything stopping one from pre nupping and wifeing hot whores from various countries I want to visit or live in every few years or so?
is divorce expensive / difficult?
if there's not many negatives I wouldn't mind wifing a hot whore for a year and then discarding her after that.
Getting Visas on the basis of marriage can be difficult as is. If you attempt to get one every few years, you'd most likely be flagged as trying to violate immigration law and would, at minimum, be denied any future "sweetheart" visas.
My friend (a gringo) that resides in Mexico just this week FINALLY got his wife, and mother of his child, a visa to come to the United States. It took them forever, even with a lawyer. This despite the fact that she is the MOTHER of his child.
The USA touts some of the most unfriendly, unwelcoming immigration procedures this world has ever seen.
It may be different for those of you outside the U.S. I am not sure.