This is my first full thread on RVF, but I've been lurking for several months, red pill for about 2 years, and gaming since before that.
I wanted to contribute back to this forum, because I've learned so much from you guys and thought I would share my own set of expertise in one niche area. Dance game.
For many guys, the dance floor can be a difficult place. Most game teaches guys how to approach girls, talk to them, escalate, and maybe even close. Less prominent are discussions of how to dominate a club. A couple of people like CMcQueen and Samseau have written awesome guides for the nightclub, so you should read those ASAP if you have not and come back to this.
Mindset
When I walk into a club dancefloor or bar with music, I own the place with first rapid approaches. Do you have a bar that you frequent every week? Do you know the bouncers, bartenders, DJs, etc? Channel the confidence you get into every NEW place you go. Remember that the difference is all in your head, so you might as well meditate on the mindset that works for your game.
One thing that helps me is a moment of meditation. I clear all the noise in my head, especially any judgment of myself or others. Empty your mind. This place is for your entertainment. The people here are lucky that YOU are in this club/bar tonight. Put on a smirk and talk to the first people you see. Doesn't really matter if they're guys or girls. Better to approach girls, so you don't get stuck talking to just dudes, especially if you're new.
After you're doing it a while, you'll realize a new environment only saps your confidence because you're essentially adapting to a new tribe/location. Focus on warming up and getting in the right mind set. Some people call this state or whatever, but you don't have to go bananas (well not yet at least) to get in the right mindset.
Be the Host
Have you ever thrown a party? What was that like? Chances are you didn't sit in a corner wondering what other were people doing or talking about. You were out and about just saying quick hellos to people who had showed up. Effectively you were gracing them with YOUR presence. Mindset is again key here, because it will come across in everything you do (nonverbal as well) if you are approaching from a place of "Omg I'm nervous so I'm trying to talk to people," versus "I own this club. Do you want the chance to meet me?"
The beginning of the night as CMcQueen points out, is critical to planting early seeds. If a girl shows interest that's fine, talk to her, maybe get her number. Usually I have extremely brief conversations. Talk to her, make her laugh, and bounce. You'll notice it'll become easier and easier to make people laugh. You'll find funny situations to go approach. Soon you're just everywhere and everybody is looking at this guy wondering, who the fuck is this guy? Helps even more to be suited up.
Dance Floor
Now, here is one of the keys to my success. People have talked to you, they've witnessed your social skills. The timing to this next part is key. You know that part early in the night where people are still too nervous or focused on getting liquered up to hit the dance floor? This is the time you must ignite the dance floor. Your value to lead the club is highest when everyone is staring at an empty dance floor, nervous to approach. I've done this hundreds of times and people are always terrible at being the first on the dance floor.
Now, here's what you do. You go straight to the middle of dance floor. To front and center depending on what's appropriate for the club. Close your eyes and feel the music. Clear your head and dance freely. Obviously it helps if you're a good dancer, but it honestly does not matter, as long as you're OWNING it. Here are a couple of tips though to help you along if you're new to dancing. I'm sure there are other guides as well.
Dancing Tips
You will now have ignited the dance floor. The best part about this is that it usually attracts girls more than guys. Guys usually need more drinks before their balls get big enough to approach the dance floor.
Blowing the place up
There's a point in the night where you'll know that people know you're the shit. This is where the fun begins. You can get away with pretty much anything. Usually, at the very least, I'll pick a girl up (physically pick her up) and shake her back and forth while turning 360. This never fails to get girls extremely attracted. The best girls to do this too are the ones who are also feeling the music with you and aren't surrounded by their friends. Another thing you can do is grab the girl and get on a stage, a booth, a table, whatever and start dancing. Usually the security will always tell you to get down. Remember to stay SMOOTH. Don't look or act (or be) sloppy drunk. If you're just having fun but are ridiculous they will just tell you to get off. Dance a couple of seconds extra and get down with ease. This shows EVERYONE you don't follow the rules. At this point you have your pick in the club. If you were dancing with a girl on the bar, everyone saw you. Don't be a dick to the staff. Usually the staff don't mind the fun as long as you're not being drunk and belligerent.
Be careful about the above. It can get addicting when you realize how easy it is and you will use it as a crutch. Don't do that. You will get IMMENSE social validation. I discovered this early in my game and it stunted my growth for a long time. Why? Because I became more addicted to the social validation from girls, etc. I would just dance with every girl but never actually capitalize. Trust me when I say that club-level social validation will blow the IOIs you get from any girl, even the 9s out of the water. Its the way we're wired. The problem is that if you don't close, you'll go home with your dick in your hand (but you will have good memories). That's why the next part is critical.
ALWAYS BE CLOSING
If you want to fuck a girl, you'll have to take the proper steps to close, which will include talking and moving. Dancing alone is not enough. There's no way around it. I've gone out night after night after night and it is very very rare to pull a girl home direct from the dance floor. I'm simplifying the minimum number of step for you. You've already laid the ground work, now you just follow through to the finish line. Grab. Iso. Bounce. Bounce again. Close.
Grab
Notice I said GRAB, not approach. SJW would have a field day with this, but when you're on the dancefloor and you've established your proof with the entire club. There's absolutely no need for formalities. Try not to grab from behind and try to grab from front. Your nonverbal eye contact maintenance is critical here. Pretty well known game concept, you should know how to approach nonverbally by now. Take her to the dancefloor and proceed to grind.
Iso
Keep talking to a minimal while you escalate. Escalation is your first priority here. Talking second.
Grinding Escalation
Here are some tried and true steps that work for me with grinding that will absolutely kill it with girls and lead to rapid escalation.
Bounce and Bounce again
Grab her hand, and walk towards the bar. Clear your path like a boss. But chances are people already recognize that you're the boss here and will part like the goddamn red sea. Walk up to the bar, hold out your 20, and order a drink. Lot of guys will say don't buy girls drinks etc. If you're in this far, it doesn't matter what you buy for her. Hell, I usually have the girl buy drinks for me, but its just semantics. If you're in the zone, you shouldn't be analyzing this stuff. The point is to get a little more liquored up. I'll often tell the girl to buy us 2 tequila shots for European-style shots. Walk away after you say this. I usually go to the bathroom and flirt/reconnect with some other girls on the way. European body shots, by the way are you put the salt on each others necks instead of hands, and limes facing out in your mouth. Lick neck, bite lime (and maybe some lip), spit out the lime onto the bar, quick makeout.
Grab her hand and head outside.
Finishing Touches
If you were smart, you called an uber on your trip to the bathroom and it should be outside soon. When you go outside, guide her into the uber. If you're doing this right, you're almost guaranteed minimal to no objections. The girl will usually raise the objections about her friends earlier in the interaction, if it was a thing. If in California, try to leave by 1 AM on a weekend night and by 12 on a weeknight.
Any objection of "I have to meet my friends" or "say bye to my friends." Respond coolly with "We're going to an afterparty, you'll text them the address." Say it calmly and with an authority she will not refuse. She'll always pick you but wants to reduce her slut-shaming. Another great AASD (anti-anti-slut defense) is, "Do you want to be in the moment or be a buzzkill/bore/old lady/etc." Another great confident line is "Text them that you'll call in the morning." This is when sex is implied for sure, which it probably is if she's in the car. The key is to get that shit timed so there is no delay. If she pulls out her phone at any point prior in the night, you just fuck with her phone. I usually like the childish tapping on the phone until she says omg, I'm just texting my friends. "Your phone can wait. Live in this moment." Usually things like this remind girls of what they already claim to love, which is living in the moment, etc. Use that to your advantage and deterring her stupid communication habits.
When you get to your place. You have the option of chilling at a bar prior to going upstairs (because you left early) or just going straight up. I usually prefer straight up, but if you think she seems unsure, then take her to another spot. It could also be the gas station outside for condoms, gum, smokes, whatever you want. This is the time to talk and use verbal game should you use. Depending on how intense the interaction is, you might just be skipping most of the talking though. Try to keep the making out to a minimum and always pull away first. Make her crave the bang. Finger her clit in the cab while talking casually to the driver if you feel like, but never let her achieve orgasm.
Take her to your room and finish the deed. I've pulled this way and still closed while sleeping on an air mattress, while living on a couch (no bedroom), and on the floor (carpet burn sucks). Enjoy gents.
I hope you find this guide useful. Feel free to reply or PM if you have further questions. Excited to start contributing to this forum.
-Raikos
I wanted to contribute back to this forum, because I've learned so much from you guys and thought I would share my own set of expertise in one niche area. Dance game.
For many guys, the dance floor can be a difficult place. Most game teaches guys how to approach girls, talk to them, escalate, and maybe even close. Less prominent are discussions of how to dominate a club. A couple of people like CMcQueen and Samseau have written awesome guides for the nightclub, so you should read those ASAP if you have not and come back to this.
Mindset
When I walk into a club dancefloor or bar with music, I own the place with first rapid approaches. Do you have a bar that you frequent every week? Do you know the bouncers, bartenders, DJs, etc? Channel the confidence you get into every NEW place you go. Remember that the difference is all in your head, so you might as well meditate on the mindset that works for your game.
One thing that helps me is a moment of meditation. I clear all the noise in my head, especially any judgment of myself or others. Empty your mind. This place is for your entertainment. The people here are lucky that YOU are in this club/bar tonight. Put on a smirk and talk to the first people you see. Doesn't really matter if they're guys or girls. Better to approach girls, so you don't get stuck talking to just dudes, especially if you're new.
After you're doing it a while, you'll realize a new environment only saps your confidence because you're essentially adapting to a new tribe/location. Focus on warming up and getting in the right mind set. Some people call this state or whatever, but you don't have to go bananas (well not yet at least) to get in the right mindset.
Be the Host
Have you ever thrown a party? What was that like? Chances are you didn't sit in a corner wondering what other were people doing or talking about. You were out and about just saying quick hellos to people who had showed up. Effectively you were gracing them with YOUR presence. Mindset is again key here, because it will come across in everything you do (nonverbal as well) if you are approaching from a place of "Omg I'm nervous so I'm trying to talk to people," versus "I own this club. Do you want the chance to meet me?"
The beginning of the night as CMcQueen points out, is critical to planting early seeds. If a girl shows interest that's fine, talk to her, maybe get her number. Usually I have extremely brief conversations. Talk to her, make her laugh, and bounce. You'll notice it'll become easier and easier to make people laugh. You'll find funny situations to go approach. Soon you're just everywhere and everybody is looking at this guy wondering, who the fuck is this guy? Helps even more to be suited up.
Dance Floor
Now, here is one of the keys to my success. People have talked to you, they've witnessed your social skills. The timing to this next part is key. You know that part early in the night where people are still too nervous or focused on getting liquered up to hit the dance floor? This is the time you must ignite the dance floor. Your value to lead the club is highest when everyone is staring at an empty dance floor, nervous to approach. I've done this hundreds of times and people are always terrible at being the first on the dance floor.
Now, here's what you do. You go straight to the middle of dance floor. To front and center depending on what's appropriate for the club. Close your eyes and feel the music. Clear your head and dance freely. Obviously it helps if you're a good dancer, but it honestly does not matter, as long as you're OWNING it. Here are a couple of tips though to help you along if you're new to dancing. I'm sure there are other guides as well.
Dancing Tips
- RHYTHM RHYTHM RHYTHM. Rhythm is absolutely critical. If you are new, choose the slowest beat. If you close your eyes and pay attention to the music, you'll notice the music has layers of rhythms. Focus on ONE of the rhythms any single time you're dancing. Move back and forth by stepping. Bend your knees. White guys look like terrible dancers, usually because they forgot to bend their knees. You could just bend your knees back and forth with some swagger in your shoulders and it would look good. As long as its with good RHYTHM.
- As you get more comfortable with dancing, use MORE SPACE. It is literally an alpha display of superiority. Don't just dance in one constrained bubble, but dance throughout the space that's given. This is you marking your territory and people will pick up on the body language cues. Especially women.
- Don't worry if you're not the tallest, you can just raise your hands in the air, and expansive body language will dominate any advantage that a tall guy might have over you (if you're insecure about that).
- Emit positive energy. This is critical. The difference between a dancing monkey (omg everyone look at me) and an alpha dominating a dance floor is that the monkey seeks the approval while the alpha (gorilla) is doing it because he enjoys it. Read above on mindset, this is why mindset is so important. Some nights my mindset has been slightly off and with even awesome dancing, people do not feel the spark and are turned off.
- Reserve your energy and movements and don't go crazy until you find a song that really clicks with you. Let yourself express your enthusiasm and depending on the song, this is when you can go hard. Dance like there's no tomorrow, dance around covering more and more space. Pull people in (especially girls). Usually at this step, I don't even have to approach, a puddle of girls will form around me. Pretty easy. Girls gravitate towards "the warm end of the pool." If you're the energy sucking leech holding a drink by the bar, girls are repelled, but if you're the life of the party they are attracted.
You will now have ignited the dance floor. The best part about this is that it usually attracts girls more than guys. Guys usually need more drinks before their balls get big enough to approach the dance floor.
Blowing the place up
There's a point in the night where you'll know that people know you're the shit. This is where the fun begins. You can get away with pretty much anything. Usually, at the very least, I'll pick a girl up (physically pick her up) and shake her back and forth while turning 360. This never fails to get girls extremely attracted. The best girls to do this too are the ones who are also feeling the music with you and aren't surrounded by their friends. Another thing you can do is grab the girl and get on a stage, a booth, a table, whatever and start dancing. Usually the security will always tell you to get down. Remember to stay SMOOTH. Don't look or act (or be) sloppy drunk. If you're just having fun but are ridiculous they will just tell you to get off. Dance a couple of seconds extra and get down with ease. This shows EVERYONE you don't follow the rules. At this point you have your pick in the club. If you were dancing with a girl on the bar, everyone saw you. Don't be a dick to the staff. Usually the staff don't mind the fun as long as you're not being drunk and belligerent.
Be careful about the above. It can get addicting when you realize how easy it is and you will use it as a crutch. Don't do that. You will get IMMENSE social validation. I discovered this early in my game and it stunted my growth for a long time. Why? Because I became more addicted to the social validation from girls, etc. I would just dance with every girl but never actually capitalize. Trust me when I say that club-level social validation will blow the IOIs you get from any girl, even the 9s out of the water. Its the way we're wired. The problem is that if you don't close, you'll go home with your dick in your hand (but you will have good memories). That's why the next part is critical.
ALWAYS BE CLOSING
If you want to fuck a girl, you'll have to take the proper steps to close, which will include talking and moving. Dancing alone is not enough. There's no way around it. I've gone out night after night after night and it is very very rare to pull a girl home direct from the dance floor. I'm simplifying the minimum number of step for you. You've already laid the ground work, now you just follow through to the finish line. Grab. Iso. Bounce. Bounce again. Close.
Grab
Notice I said GRAB, not approach. SJW would have a field day with this, but when you're on the dancefloor and you've established your proof with the entire club. There's absolutely no need for formalities. Try not to grab from behind and try to grab from front. Your nonverbal eye contact maintenance is critical here. Pretty well known game concept, you should know how to approach nonverbally by now. Take her to the dancefloor and proceed to grind.
Iso
Keep talking to a minimal while you escalate. Escalation is your first priority here. Talking second.
Grinding Escalation
Here are some tried and true steps that work for me with grinding that will absolutely kill it with girls and lead to rapid escalation.
- Rhythm. Rhythm. Rhythm. (Yes again). You must lead her ass and your hips with a uniform motion. You can't do this if she's just shaking her ass and you're following. That's what most betas do by default. Sometimes its good to even stop her with firm grip (for a moment) on her hips and then move her hips to the tune of your dick. Chicks go wild when I do that.
- If you're dancing with a hoe (likely in this counry), Grab the hair on the back of her head. Pull it first, she'll get wet, then push her head down so her ass is up. Lean back for dramatic effect.
- When she is enjoying herself a little too much, pull her back up, and swing her hips so she turns to face you. Put your hands behind her hair on her neck. Grind front to front. Make sure she feels your dick (which should get hard). Girls actually love this shit. I've actually lost girls because my dick didn't get hard after drinking red bull (can also happen from drinking too much). Pop half a viagra earlier in the night if you have ED problems.
- Maintain eye contact as much as possible at this phase. You can get to closing pretty quickly if you maintain it. When the tension is building, look her square and say (in your deep voice) "Name." Pull her to you so she answers in your ear. Do not fucking bend down to listen to her response. This alpha body language is important.
- Depending on level of compliance I usually put her hand on my dick or depending on her dress style, I can start fingering her directly. Its a little ballsy, but if you are really on fire, you won't even hesitate. Just do it. She's practically humping you already. She's probably pretty wet. Tease her about being so wet by whispering in her ear. Take out your finger and make her taste her juices. Remember, as with everything, leave her wanting more. I've kissed girls and not kissed girls. Some girls are weird about getting fingered before kissing, etc. You stand out by going straight for the vag, before worrying about kissing her. Usually they will make out with you, in which case you reciprocate and pull back when she's having too much fun. If you get this far, you've got it on lock and just need to clear logistics.
Bounce and Bounce again
Grab her hand, and walk towards the bar. Clear your path like a boss. But chances are people already recognize that you're the boss here and will part like the goddamn red sea. Walk up to the bar, hold out your 20, and order a drink. Lot of guys will say don't buy girls drinks etc. If you're in this far, it doesn't matter what you buy for her. Hell, I usually have the girl buy drinks for me, but its just semantics. If you're in the zone, you shouldn't be analyzing this stuff. The point is to get a little more liquored up. I'll often tell the girl to buy us 2 tequila shots for European-style shots. Walk away after you say this. I usually go to the bathroom and flirt/reconnect with some other girls on the way. European body shots, by the way are you put the salt on each others necks instead of hands, and limes facing out in your mouth. Lick neck, bite lime (and maybe some lip), spit out the lime onto the bar, quick makeout.
Grab her hand and head outside.
Finishing Touches
If you were smart, you called an uber on your trip to the bathroom and it should be outside soon. When you go outside, guide her into the uber. If you're doing this right, you're almost guaranteed minimal to no objections. The girl will usually raise the objections about her friends earlier in the interaction, if it was a thing. If in California, try to leave by 1 AM on a weekend night and by 12 on a weeknight.
Any objection of "I have to meet my friends" or "say bye to my friends." Respond coolly with "We're going to an afterparty, you'll text them the address." Say it calmly and with an authority she will not refuse. She'll always pick you but wants to reduce her slut-shaming. Another great AASD (anti-anti-slut defense) is, "Do you want to be in the moment or be a buzzkill/bore/old lady/etc." Another great confident line is "Text them that you'll call in the morning." This is when sex is implied for sure, which it probably is if she's in the car. The key is to get that shit timed so there is no delay. If she pulls out her phone at any point prior in the night, you just fuck with her phone. I usually like the childish tapping on the phone until she says omg, I'm just texting my friends. "Your phone can wait. Live in this moment." Usually things like this remind girls of what they already claim to love, which is living in the moment, etc. Use that to your advantage and deterring her stupid communication habits.
When you get to your place. You have the option of chilling at a bar prior to going upstairs (because you left early) or just going straight up. I usually prefer straight up, but if you think she seems unsure, then take her to another spot. It could also be the gas station outside for condoms, gum, smokes, whatever you want. This is the time to talk and use verbal game should you use. Depending on how intense the interaction is, you might just be skipping most of the talking though. Try to keep the making out to a minimum and always pull away first. Make her crave the bang. Finger her clit in the cab while talking casually to the driver if you feel like, but never let her achieve orgasm.
Take her to your room and finish the deed. I've pulled this way and still closed while sleeping on an air mattress, while living on a couch (no bedroom), and on the floor (carpet burn sucks). Enjoy gents.
I hope you find this guide useful. Feel free to reply or PM if you have further questions. Excited to start contributing to this forum.
-Raikos