[Days of Broken Arrows]

Thanks for all the answers.

This whole thing reminds me of the last scene of the movie, "A Bronx Tale." It has to do with women's lack of politeness in small matters being a metaphor for how they'll treat you in the larger scheme of things. Like whether a woman thinks to unlock your car door when she gets in first:

"Listen to me, kid. If she doesn't reach over and lift up that button for you so you can get in, that means she's a selfish broad and all you're seeing is the tip of the iceburg."

If you've never seen this movie, take four minutes and watch this:

[Octane]

(06-03-2014 10:31 PM)Vitriol Wrote:  

Let me guess, these 3 incidents you listed were all American girls?

I was thinking this exactly as I was reading the original post!

[Ballr]

Bump! Am I the only one that finds it annoying when a girl doesn't reciprocate the small things?

- Wakes up and tweets to the world / goes to school before saying good morning to me.
- Falling asleep without saying goodnight sometimes

I'm used to being showered with compliments, attention, etc. I find it selfish to ignore a simple thing like this, and would you consider that just the beginning of even worse habits? All she does is change the subject when I call her out on it or is sarcastically sorry. Thinking of dropping the cunt.

[samsamsam]

Been on a few dates with one girl - I pick up the tab, as usual. Not even a thanks. Her tit better be worth it. They are pretty yummy looking

[XPQ22]

The main girl I'm seeing right now is pretty good in this regard. She appreciates the fact that it takes me a half hour to drive to her place, and always has dinner waiting when I arrive. "Can I get you a drink? No, no, I'm already up, let me do it. How much vermouth do you like in your martini?"

Not bad at all for a white girl I met via online dating. She has some moderate feminist leanings, but at the end of the day, she seems to really like to be able to engage her domestic instincts. There are definitely a few diamonds in the rough - she's not the hottest girl I've pulled from online game, I'd say simply a cute
"6", but she works on improving herself in all the ways she can control, and apparently knows what skills to bring to bear to "shoot above her level" successfully. Aside from a mild episode of drama a few weeks ago when she was ragging hard, she's always a pleasure to be around.

WIA made a post about "Kramerica" in regards to girls a while back, and I should probably find more ways to make her feel productive. She seems to really want to be on the team.

[DimeBait]

That sort of pickiness and pettiness is a recipe for ultimately being alone.

[Rush87]

(06-03-2014 10:13 PM)Days of Broken Arrows Wrote:  

I'm throwing this out to the board. Problems or not problems? Is it me?

#1: I go to dinner with a woman and pick up the tab. It's a very casual local place, so no big deal. We then go a convenience store to get some stuff for later. She finds a dollar. She doesn't offer it to me, but keeps it. This is minutes after I paid the dinner bill. This really sticks in my craw because I feel it's indicative of character. It's not the money, but the principle.

#2: A woman stays at my place. The next morning I offer her something to eat. She declines. A half hour later, she decides she wants some cereal. She fixes herself a bowl...and doesn't ask if I want anything. Again, I'm annoyed.

#3: Same woman as #2. Finishes the cereal. Instead of putting the spoon in the nice dishwasher I have, I see her out of the corner of my eye run it under water, dry it off, and put it back in the drawer. Ew! Gross! Or is it? Do people do this? I never have, but maybe this is normal...for other people.

Thanks in advance for any input. I need to know if I'm going to be returning the messages that are piling up. Both women are nice-looking, but people become ugly and annoying to me when I feel they breach social etiquette. Or, am I just really uptight, and get wound up over things other guys wouldn't notice?

#1 and #3 are a non issue. #2 is a sign of selfish behaviour and would essentially kill any chance she had of having a LTR with me [And agree 100% with the Bronx Tale reference]. It's a small test that every man should utilise and implement without question.

Edit: Just saw the date. I'm a bit late lol.

[Vaun]

(06-01-2016 04:23 PM)Grindhard Wrote:  

I'm used to being showered with compliments, attention, etc. I find it selfish to ignore a simple thing like this, and would you consider that just the beginning of even worse habits? All she does is change the subject when I call her out on it or is sarcastically sorry. Thinking of dropping the cunt.

So am I, but consider the source. Was the showering girl a little off, or, over the top and smothering? Is the new girl from another culture, non-US, or just different in general? Is this why you like her? Don't let personality differences shape your view of how all girls should treat you. But yes, she could like you less than the previous expressive girl. And yes, tweeting and posting to social before saying good morning means you're lower on her priority list. Dont expect a good night text ever before marriage.

[Ballr]

(06-01-2016 10:10 PM)Vaun Wrote:  

(06-01-2016 04:23 PM)Grindhard Wrote:  

I'm used to being showered with compliments, attention, etc. I find it selfish to ignore a simple thing like this, and would you consider that just the beginning of even worse habits? All she does is change the subject when I call her out on it or is sarcastically sorry. Thinking of dropping the cunt.

So am I, but consider the source. Was the showering girl a little off, or, over the top and smothering? Is the new girl from another culture, non-US, or just different in general? Is this why you like her? Don't let personality differences shape your view of how all girls should treat you. But yes, she could like you less than the previous expressive girl. And yes, tweeting and posting to social before saying good morning means you're lower on her priority list. Dont expect a good night text ever before marriage.

The girl which expressed lots of femininity and affection loved the idea of being submissive. In catering to my needs. This current girl is from the same ethnic background as me but is westernized for sure. She's overly sarcastic, gets offended by harmless humor, and very much a hypocrite who's always playing the blame game any chance she get. Basically, a pain in the ass. Just solid bc she's a virgin and has her sweet moments.

[XPQ22]

e

(06-01-2016 04:23 PM)Grindhard Wrote:  

I'm used to being showered with compliments, attention, etc. I find it selfish to ignore a simple thing like this, and would you consider that just the beginning of even worse habits? All she does is change the subject when I call her out on it or is sarcastically sorry. Thinking of dropping the cunt.

Girls that shower you with compliments early into a relationship are full of shit.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Love_bombing

It's just a manipulation tactic. It absolutely is the beginning of worse behavior - I guarantee it. A girl being unable to genuinely apologize when she's legitimately done wrong is a huge red flag for LTR potential. Before you know it she'll be manipulating you in other ways, trying to get you involved in jealousy drama and generally making your life miserable. She comes in full blast like a backwards 7 course dinner, you get the awesome dessert first and by the end you're scrabbling around for a stale chicken finger. Read some of the BPD threads.

Hit it then next these hoes...just always use a condom every time as they're banging half the town behind your back as well.

[greekgod]

It may just have been a good month for me but I'm noticing something.

The more self satisfied I am, the less tude I get and the more receptive women and actually all people are. I don't know if I'm #MAGA drunk or what but I've been walking around in a very genuinely happy mood as of late. Its reflecting everywhere. I've just given myself permission to enjoy life and if chicks accept my vibe, great.

Its come down to viewing myself as better than them, maybe the term is actually "content without their approval" and a value add. I'm also making a conscious effort to be social with everyone. I want your day to be better after having interacted with me. And on a base human level, I believe everyone responds to this. Maybe its not "game" correct, but I believe that it shines through in everything.

Today, for example, as I was getting off an uncrowded bus, I was standing on the stairs of the upper tier with this chick sitting infront of me. Instead of rushing out, I let her go first and I saw a genuine smile from the side. As she exits, she turns back, holds the door, holds my gaze, and just smiles in a very appreciative, semi seductive way. Twenty minutes later, having a great conversation with a cashier at the grocery store.

So yeah, went off topic but my focus is to be social with everyone, project a vibe that we want to be kind to one another, and have an infectious positive aura.

Its hard to be rude to someone when they project that type of demeanor.

And lastly, removing porn from my life has injected such a vitality that I firmly believe its largely due to this.

[AnonymousBosch]

(06-03-2014 10:13 PM)Days of Broken Arrows Wrote:  

#3: Same woman as #2. Finishes the cereal. Instead of putting the spoon in the nice dishwasher I have, I see her out of the corner of my eye run it under water, dry it off, and put it back in the drawer. Ew! Gross! Or is it? Do people do this? I never have, but maybe this is normal...for other people.

Could be worse:

I was dating a girl in High School and was invited over for dinner to meet her parents. Meal was good, everyone finished up, and then I watched as each family member in turn let their two Dalmatians lick the plates clean. This was done casually enough that it suggested this was their everyday, normal procedure.

You ever spread a girls legs during sex and realised you're not looking at her snatch, but checking her legs for Ringworm?

[Ballr]

(06-01-2016 10:33 PM)XPQ22 Wrote:  

e

(06-01-2016 04:23 PM)Grindhard Wrote:  

I'm used to being showered with compliments, attention, etc. I find it selfish to ignore a simple thing like this, and would you consider that just the beginning of even worse habits? All she does is change the subject when I call her out on it or is sarcastically sorry. Thinking of dropping the cunt.

Girls that shower you with compliments early into a relationship are full of shit.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Love_bombing

It's just a manipulation tactic. It absolutely is the beginning of worse behavior - I guarantee it. A girl being unable to genuinely apologize when she's legitimately done wrong is a huge red flag for LTR potential. Before you know it she'll be manipulating you in other ways, trying to get you involved in jealousy drama and generally making your life miserable. She comes in full blast like a backwards 7 course dinner, you get the awesome dessert first and by the end you're scrabbling around for a stale chicken finger. Read some of the BPD threads.

Hit it then next these hoes...just always use a condom every time as they're banging half the town behind your back as well.

What would you consider a wrong doing? (Outside of lying / cheating). Things that matter to me do not matter to her in that she can't see why I make things a big deal. It's only when I flip the script and ask how she'd feel if I would do/say that, and even then I slightly don't get through. Says she hates being "lectured".

Am I wasting time explaining why I care about the "little" things? Such as remembering to txt goodnight/good morning on a consistent basis. I've realized that some chicks are just dead in the water. You can't have high expectations (even as common as reciprocation and empathy). Not sure if I'm on the right track there.

[XPQ22]

(06-02-2016 12:08 AM)Grindhard Wrote:  

What would you consider a wrong doing? (Outside of lying / cheating). Things that matter to me do not matter to her in that she can't see why I make things a big deal. It's only when I flip the script and ask how she'd feel if I would do/say that, and even then I slightly don't get through. Says she hates being "lectured".

Am I wasting time explaining why I care about the "little" things? Such as remembering to txt goodnight/good morning on a consistent basis. I've realized that some chicks are just dead in the water. You can't have high expectations (even as common as reciprocation and empathy). Not sure if I'm on the right track there.

If you're lecturing girls on a consistent basis, and feeling like you have to "lay down the law", you're losing the "frame battle." It's a waste of time; they are not going to fucking listen. It's fine to do it in a teasing manner; from time to time I tell one of the girls I'm with "Hey! You're really being a brat!" but if you're acting serious about it, it comes off as needy and like you care way too much. No doubt she doesn't like being "lectured" - it's sign of a needy guy who isn't really "alpha."

Aside from lying/cheating? Yeah, the girls I've been with apologize for all sorts of stuff. "Hey, I know I said you could come by at 6:30, and that this is short notice, but I just found out I need to stay at work until 8. Sorry about that, it was news to me as well. I hope it's okay and you can come by then."

"Hey, I grabbed your head while you were eating me out, and I know you told me that you didn't like that. I was just really into it - my bad! I'll try to not do that again."

It's a sign of being what we call a "normal human being." If a girl is not capable of doing things like this, then she is not relationship material of any type, not even a FWB...period.

Yes, I think you are wasting time on worrying about those "little things." The main girl in my rotation doesn't text me until 2 in the afternoon sometimes. I'd be silly to worry about it as I understand that she has her own job and life...and if I were complaining to her that she wasn't texting me every morning at 8 AM to say "Good morning sweetie!" she'd find it super fucking needy and next me ASAP. She's a FWB, she's not my wife.

Instead I just reply gladly and nonchalantly whenever she decides to get around to it. In return she is always up for me to hit it and almost never gives me any drama...because she knows that I will fucking walk.

I think you need to look at yourself and consider for what reason these things that you admit are minor are so important. Sounds like ego is rearing its ugly head once again. Ego is a game-killer...but I guess it depends on what you're in the game for. For me, I'm not in it to prop up my self-esteem. I simply do it because enjoying the company of attractive women from time to time, shooting my load on their faces, and then giving them the post-sex cuddle is one of the finest pleasures this short life has to offer. I'm all about the nut.

[Ballr]

(06-02-2016 12:47 AM)XPQ22 Wrote:  

(06-02-2016 12:08 AM)Grindhard Wrote:  

What would you consider a wrong doing? (Outside of lying / cheating). Things that matter to me do not matter to her in that she can't see why I make things a big deal. It's only when I flip the script and ask how she'd feel if I would do/say that, and even then I slightly don't get through. Says she hates being "lectured".

Am I wasting time explaining why I care about the "little" things? Such as remembering to txt goodnight/good morning on a consistent basis. I've realized that some chicks are just dead in the water. You can't have high expectations (even as common as reciprocation and empathy). Not sure if I'm on the right track there.

If you're lecturing girls on a consistent basis, and feeling like you have to "lay down the law", you're losing the "frame battle." It's a waste of time; they are not going to fucking listen. It's fine to do it in a teasing manner, from time to time I tell one of the girls I'm with "Hey! You're really being a brat!" but if you're acting serious about it, it comes of as needy and like you care way too much. No doubt she doesn't like being "lectured" - it's sign of a needy guy who isn't really "alpha."

Aside from lying/cheating? Yeah, the girls I've been with apologize for all sorts of stuff. "Hey, I know I said you could come by at 6:30, and that this is short notice, but I just found out I need to stay at work until 8. Sorry about that, it was news to me as well. I hope it's okay and you can come by then."

"Hey, I grabbed your head while you were eating me out, and I know you told me that you didn't like that. I was just really into it - my bad! I'll try to not do that again."

It's a sign of being what we call a "normal human being." If a girl is not capable of doing things like this, then she is not relationship material, period.

Yes, I think you are wasting time on worrying about those "little things." The main girl in my rotation doesn't text me until 2 in the afternoon sometimes. I'd be silly to worry about it as I understand that she has her own job and life...and if I were complaining to her that she wasn't texting me every morning at 8 AM to say "Good morning sweetie!" she'd find it super fucking needy and next me ASAP. She's a FWB, she's not my wife.

Instead I just reply gladly and nonchalantly whenever she decides to get around to it. In return she is always up for me to hit it and almost never gives me any drama...because she knows that I will fucking walk.

I should probably mention that she's not just another bimbo in my rotation. I've made a ton of money, notch count is decent, and I don't get much satisfaction anymore just banging away. With this girl I'd like something serious, but am I needy for watching out for signs of selfishness or the inability to respect things I want?

Give a girl too much freedom then you might be in for a disaster. I don't want to let my guard down and let shit slide. This is coming from a LTR perspective, not in player form.

In addition, she is a virgin waiting for marriage. But, she still gives me head and swallows and I finger her etc. She's not a feminist, and not too feminine. Borderline, cold. Can we say, a Capricorn? lol

[XPQ22]

(06-02-2016 01:00 AM)Grindhard Wrote:  

In addition, she is a virgin waiting for marriage. But, she still gives me head and swallows and I finger her etc. She's not a feminist, and not too feminine. Borderline, cold. Can we say, a Capricorn? lol

If she's an attractive young girl who's maybe more of the "introverted" type, and also a virgin (let's not get into that one...) it may be that she just lacks experience in romantic relationships. That's not necessarily bad...but I still think trying to be really forceful about minor issues is the incorrect approach.

The reason the "soft next" is an effective "relationship management" technique is because you're pulling back the one thing young women want from you the most - your attention. You don't want to use it all the time, but in my (admittedly limited) experience withdrawing attention is a great way to nonconfrontationally inform women what you appreciate, and what you don't. I think it's impossible to have any relationship with a woman for any length of time which doesn't have some level of drama/conflict, but getting upset just hurts everyone. I think of pulling back on the attention as a "harm reduction" technique.

Young women hold a lot of the cards, but we do control when we give them what they want and when we do not. And being sensitive and critical regarding minor issues is a form of attention. Chicks are pretty sharp about many things, even young virgins...it can be a little difficult to know exactly the situation from a few paragraphs, but it sounds sort of like she realizes you view her as a hot prospect for a serious LTR, and she's leveraging that to her advantage. If you didn't, when she told you that she was a virgin and/or saving herself for marriage you would have walked - it seems unlikely that someone else who didn't see in her what you do hasn't done that before.

As you say, it seems women have some kind of innate unquenchable desire to push. But simply not giving is often all it takes to get them back in line.

These are good issues for me to think about as well, because though I said above that for the moment I'm "all about the nut", for me I feel that it's simply because I was out of the game for a while for various reasons, and I find myself back in it right in my mid 30s, when my SMV is at its peak and I'm getting more attention from women than I ever have. It also helps that I worked very hard at taking care of myself and living a "clean" lifestyle, so I look significantly younger than my actual age. But time marches on, and I'm sure at some point banging for the sake of banging will lose appeal for me also, and I'll find myself seeking something similar to what you are.

[spygoat]

Fellas - While I can appreciate some of the concern (ie. we don't want to be dating slobs etc.) is this really a problem for you at the end of the day? I'm not saying names, but take a look in the mirror, you sound like a bitch.

- getting upset because she doesn't text you in the morning - not alpha
- getting upset because she changed her mind over wanting cereal or not - not alpha

You're entitled to feel however you want but I seriously doubt most guys would get annoyed or upset over something so trivial.

Women act the way they do, they are impulsive, irrational, emotional creatures; embrace and accept that fact and life and sex with them is way easier.

EDIT - ^XPQ22 - soft next, once I learned how to do it, biggest weapon in the arsenal, if she doesn't something you don't like, remove attention, women don't think like us but generally speaking they will know what they have done to bring about the soft next.

http://en.kingswiki.com/wiki/Soft_next

[DimeBait]

(06-02-2016 11:16 AM)spygoat Wrote:  

Fellas - While I can appreciate some of the concern (ie. we don't want to be dating slobs etc.) is this really a problem for you at the end of the day? I'm not saying names, but take a look in the mirror, you sound like a bitch.

- getting upset because she doesn't text you in the morning - not alpha
- getting upset because she changed her mind over wanting cereal or not - not alpha

You're entitled to feel however you want but I seriously doubt most guys would get annoyed or upset over something so trivial.

Women act the way they do, they are impulsive, irrational, emotional creatures; embrace and accept that fact and life and sex with them is way easier.

ALL OF THIS^^^

[Homeboyy280]

(06-03-2014 10:13 PM)Days of Broken Arrows Wrote:  

I'm throwing this out to the board. Problems or not problems? Is it me?

#1: I go to dinner with a woman and pick up the tab. It's a very casual local place, so no big deal. We then go a convenience store to get some stuff for later. She finds a dollar. She doesn't offer it to me, but keeps it. This is minutes after I paid the dinner bill. This really sticks in my craw because I feel it's indicative of character. It's not the money, but the principle.

#2: A woman stays at my place. The next morning I offer her something to eat. She declines. A half hour later, she decides she wants some cereal. She fixes herself a bowl...and doesn't ask if I want anything. Again, I'm annoyed.

#3: Same woman as #2. Finishes the cereal. Instead of putting the spoon in the nice dishwasher I have, I see her out of the corner of my eye run it under water, dry it off, and put it back in the drawer. Ew! Gross! Or is it? Do people do this? I never have, but maybe this is normal...for other people.

Out of sequence:

1. Finding the dollar is like finding a lucky penny, only adjusted for inflation. Why would she offer it to you? Do you need luck? A casual meal for two is $30 minimum these days -- a dollar won't make any difference.

3. She is filthy and thus unfit. If her mother didn't train her, you sure as hell will not.

2. Pardonable. She figured that when you asked her if she was hungry, that was when you were thinking of eating. But you didn't eat. Therefore you were not hungry.

[pitt]

If you are not looking to date these women in the long run, that should not bother you.

Sure that these women lack some social etiquette but those aforementioned things are not that bad, I have seen way worse. I wouldn't stop fucking these women over these small things, specially if you find them attractive and they have other qualities that makes them pleasant.