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Can't get 2nd dates
#1

Can't get 2nd dates

I live in the suburbs, about a 20 minute drive from the city, and so do most of the girls I end up meeting. The result is I have to do the date thing due to bad logistics.

My problem is I have been on about 20 dates and nearly all of them didn't respond after the date. The one or two that did seemed very cold and uninterested. Prior to the date they were all fairly interested in me and wanted to see me, based on text messages.

Except for the couple girls that were under 21, I usually take them a bar for a few drinks. I've tried venue changing, but usually it just doesn't work and they just end up leaving. I think my dates are boring and uninteresting, so I guess I need to make them more interesting. I certainly could use work on my conversation skills and vibe, but I thought that by randomness alone I'd get at least one girl that was interested in me by now.

I meet these girls through a mixture of day game and Tinder. I don't do night game because I hate staying up late and it doesn't fit into my lifestyle.

Anybody got any ideas that I can try? I have Roosh's book, which is great, but I just can't seem to apply anything when I'm on dates.
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#2

Can't get 2nd dates

Sex first. Dating 2nd ...if at all. It's gotten to the point now where if you don't sexually satisfy a woman on 1st bang then she'll close the door on any chance of a traditional "relationship".

What I'm trying to say is you didn't escalate enough and push for sex on the first date. Not only do you have to push for sex you have to get her off. You'll see her tone change right away. She'll be more responsive and won't flake.

Team Nachos
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#3

Can't get 2nd dates

Quote: (08-30-2014 01:14 PM)Parlay44 Wrote:  

Sex first. Dating 2nd ...if at all. It's gotten to the point now where if you don't sexually satisfy a woman on 1st bang then she'll close the door on any chance of a traditional "relationship".

What I'm trying to say is you didn't escalate enough and push for sex on the first date. Not only do you have to push for sex you have to get her off. You'll see her tone change right away. She'll be more responsive and won't flake.

Nice. Thanks for that. I do think I need to be aggressive escalating. I'll work on that.
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#4

Can't get 2nd dates

Quote: (08-30-2014 02:09 PM)Loudou Wrote:  

Quote: (08-30-2014 01:14 PM)Parlay44 Wrote:  

Sex first. Dating 2nd ...if at all. It's gotten to the point now where if you don't sexually satisfy a woman on 1st bang then she'll close the door on any chance of a traditional "relationship".

What I'm trying to say is you didn't escalate enough and push for sex on the first date. Not only do you have to push for sex you have to get her off. You'll see her tone change right away. She'll be more responsive and won't flake.

Nice. Thanks for that. I do think I need to be aggressive escalating. I'll work on that.


what parlay wrote is true in that girls do not respect guys who don't escalate when the girl wants them to, but not escalating might not be your only obstacle. (there are plenty of girls who will go on a date 2 even if you didnt fuck them on the first date). it might be that simple but it could be body language, voice, style, value, fun... anything. on your own the solution is to keep escalating so that you figure out your limitations and fix them, if the limitation is solely escalation then be glad because it is easy to fix. it might be a lot faster to find a solid wing who can give you specific advice.
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#5

Can't get 2nd dates

Quote: (08-30-2014 12:57 PM)Loudou Wrote:  

I live in the suburbs, about a 20 minute drive from the city, and so do most of the girls I end up meeting. The result is I have to do the date thing due to bad logistics.

My problem is I have been on about 20 dates and nearly all of them didn't respond after the date. The one or two that did seemed very cold and uninterested. Prior to the date they were all fairly interested in me and wanted to see me, based on text messages.

Except for the couple girls that were under 21, I usually take them a bar for a few drinks. I've tried venue changing, but usually it just doesn't work and they just end up leaving. I think my dates are boring and uninteresting, so I guess I need to make them more interesting. I certainly could use work on my conversation skills and vibe, but I thought that by randomness alone I'd get at least one girl that was interested in me by now.

I meet these girls through a mixture of day game and Tinder. I don't do night game because I hate staying up late and it doesn't fit into my lifestyle.

Anybody got any ideas that I can try? I have Roosh's book, which is great, but I just can't seem to apply anything when I'm on dates.

Guys have given you good advice on escalation. Escalation is tied to confidence. You derive confidence from experience and pushing yourself just past the point of your comfort level. Set up two or three goals related to escalating on each date that you set up. Push the envelope.

Check out my thread on Overcoming Bad Logistics

http://www.rooshvforum.network/thread-38236.html
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#6

Can't get 2nd dates

You know what the problem is, which is an insight more than a lot of guys ever achieve. You've isolated where you're going wrong.

To be frank it sounds like you aren't being very fun during the date itself. It's possible that you've got yourself into a negative feedback loop here where because you know the dates themselves haven't gone well you put too much pressure on yourself and as a result the dates just keep going badly.

It's hard to isolate for you exactly what's going on due to a lack of information but start as the other guys have suggested by just being super sexually forward; escalate escalate escalate.

It's easier in my opinion, to scale this down with experience than scale it up. So go hard or go home. You will get sex this way and will learn how to calibrate it to the girl in front of you.

Definition of insanity: doing the same thing over and over again expecting different results.

Turn it on its head!
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#7

Can't get 2nd dates

Thanks guys, I really appreciate it.
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#8

Can't get 2nd dates

Nope it has nothing to do with being aggressive unless she really came out just to fuck you, threw all signs and you chickened out.

Your vibe is not be well coordinated, she felt awkward and got turned off.

Being aggressive is easy. All you need to do is move your hands here and there.

But making her wants you psychologically? easy?

Typical rookie mistake 'I need to man up! I need to man up!

Well if you can't listen to me, try that escalation thing and let me know how it went.
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#9

Can't get 2nd dates

So tried a more aggressive approach. It seems to have worked. There girls seem much more interested as I tried to escalate.

I still have yet to get a bang, but I did get inside girls apartment and hung out with her in there for 30 minutes. I even got inside her bedroom.
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#10

Can't get 2nd dates

I think aggressive is the wrong word to use. You just need to be assertive. Get the conversation flowing have a few drinks get her comfortable with you then a simple 'its getting a bit dead in here how about we continue at my place' or if your trying to get to hers 'how about i get a bottle of xxx and well continue the party at your place' responses to that can only be positive. She can either say no not today , yes or straight up no. If its the last then you know to move on to the next.
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