[Dalaran1991]

Spin off from the AA thread.

Main girl just gone back to Korea so Im on the hunt again. After a few months in a sorta LTR my game got a bit rusty but this is still my biggest hangup.

I have no problem approaching girls thanks to my experience dancing Salsa and Bachata. A night I can approach and dance with up to 20 girls. Put me next to a girl, I can chat her up all night.

The big problem is that I still have sexual anxiety. Approach has now become instinctual, but escalating and closing is not. Every time I wanna get sexual with a girl my hamster start running and I find myself blabering away and my body language goes to shit.

And I find it difficult to bring myself to close the deal with all approaches. I dont ask for a date or number cuz hamster is saying "bitch aint biting bro. Eject and next now". I dont escalate physically (aside from light tapping or hug) unless I see greenlight. I close or escal about half of my approaches.

What is even more fucked up is that, when I do bring myself to escal and close the deal, girl turns from sweet girl next door to club bitch. They would suddenly go cold, get nervous or try to eject, whereas they were talking about their awesome tatoos and first crazy college exp the last 30 min. Its like, as soon as they learn that I might be interested in them, their bitch mode flares up.

Since I approach a lot I do very well with girls who already find me attractive. With these I have no problem. Best was when I grab a girls boobs in the bar before we even made out, bc she was giving me so much IOI. But if I dont see IOI Im very hesistant

I THINK my problem might be sexual shame but I doubt it since Im very dominant in bed. Anyway its something I need to fix.

Would appreciate feedback

[SydneyD]

An inner game issue. I think it's one of those things you'll get better at the more you do it.

The more confident you become when closing, the more natural and less nervous you will seem and this will deflect a chick's bitch shields and stop her from locking up her pussy and LMR. So work on improving your self confidence

And don't just wait for a greenlight to escalate. If your boner tells you to escalate then you should fucking escalate

happy hunting

[Nomad77]

So you want to be more sexual? Just try this, while you are talking to the girl think sexual thoughts about her. Think about what it would be like to have sex with her or what she would look like naked. It's sort of hard to do and talk at the same time but you can do it while you are listening to her. This works best if you can get the girl talking most of the time. And then you can just sit there and look at her, in her eyes, while you are thinking your dirty thoughts. It's not a good idea to verbalize your sexuality until after you have had sex a few times with a girl. Express your sexuality with your eyes and how you touch her. Becoming sexual is lot more about becoming comfortable with feeling and expressing your own sexuality than anything else.

[Dalaran1991]

I like the idea, especially since whenever I see a cute girl my first thought would be how would she look in her lingerie. Ive heard this sexual eye contact before, but are you saying that doing it will make it easier for me to escalate physically? Or eye contact is sufficient for escalation?

I doubt its the latter. I enjoyed your last thread why my game wont help you and you certainly escalate sexually physically with the girl (grabbing her pussy in a bar, awesome man. Furthest Ive gone is grabbing boobs) If this eye contact thing will make me feel bolder Im certainly gonna try it.

[Nomad77]

Sexual eye contact will make the girl excited which will make you feel more comfortable escalating. Most men have a problem escalating because they are not getting any sexual signals from the girl. It's very difficult when the girl is cold. When we want to know what someone is going to do, where do we look? At their eyes. The eyes tells us someone intent. So when the girl looks into your eyes what intention should she see? That you want to ravish her right there and now!

[Dalaran1991]

(07-07-2014 04:13 AM)Nomad77 Wrote:  

Sexual eye contact will make the girl excited which will make you feel more comfortable escalating. Most men have a problem escalating because they are not getting any sexual signals from the girl. It's very difficult when the girl is cold.

This is what my post is about. Without greenlight is very hard to escalate. LMR is a different thing all together.

Guess I have to do both. Theres a payoff in racing past the greenlights.

[Nomad77]

The sexual eye contact will get you some greenlights.

[Noir]

You don't want her enough to escalate. She is there for the taking and you aren't biting.

Ask yourself why?

Where is my desire?

It could be a plethora of things from your feelings of guilt towards your main girl (subconscious) to limiting beliefs (you don't deserve to) to low testosterone/frequent masturbation.

Only you can answer this.

I don't wait for signals because I am entitled to touch her. I am doing her a favour, by giving her an opportunity with me. I -want- to make her feel good and share a moment with her.

Like Nomad77, I think of sexual things and I sexualize the interaction but the reason/frame is because I want to share a moment with her. How amazing is it that I can meet a woman and within 2-3 hours I can get her to be more intimate with me than 99% of the world.

[Nomad77]

Men today have been taught by society that they need the woman's permission to express their desire. So they wait for her approval. What neither men nor women understand is that a woman does not want to approve anything. She wants to be taken. If you truly believe something is yours then you do not need anyone permission to take it.