[Dusty]

(06-06-2014 10:47 PM)Christian McQueen Wrote:  

OP has PM'd me and I emailed him back that I will be in contact after the weekend. Once Friday hits I'm in a state of partying until Monday.

With the free help of Gio and myself (and all of the cats who have posted on this thread) no one can accuse the RVF forum of not offering help to those who want it.

[jtteop]

I didn't expect my posting career on rooshvforum to start out like this but this is absolutely fascinating. The reason being that if it was just some aspergers person doing 3000 robot approaches then that's one thing, and even that would be pretty surprising if it didn't have any results but this guy has said:

"On this particular night, I felt so confident that I just walked up to a girl who was eating, sat down across the table from her, and just LOOKED at her, without saying a word. She immediately started smiling and giggling, and asking me about myself. We made deep, sensual eye contact. I was feeling like this was it – the girlfriend I’ve been waiting for all this time!"

No aspergers person would ever say something like that.

[Simeon_Strangelight]

(06-07-2014 01:32 PM)thegreenman Wrote:  

...

I’m sure if I had a girlfriend, I’d start to relax and appreciate male companionship more. Cause it’s not that I don’t care. I’m not a sociopath. ...

Yeah - I can only imagine that the frustration has built up to such a degree that it is hard to focus truly. I can remember as a teenager how awkward I was with girls before getting laid the first time and then again until I had my first girlfriend.

I also had a few encounters with "older" female virgins (21+) and they usually were a bit strange at first. I did not realize what the reason for their strange behavior was until the truth came out.

Most of us have a basic need for sex and m/f-relationship that is just too strong to live for extended periods without. At least we would like to have had that experience in life.

Keep up the work, get your money Game in order and I am sure the guys like McQeen and Gio can help you.

[Cyclone]

Quote:

Alcohol, to me, isn’t liquid courage like it is for others. I’ve got the courage already. What alcohol does for me is it makes me go to SLEEP. After one or two drinks, my eyelids start to close, and all I want to do is just slink back in my chair and doze off.

Are you sure you're not drinking beer, but hard liquor as well? Beer is what makes you pass out, but shots like vodka and rum should keep you up and active.

Aside from that, I could make a massive post for you but just don't have the time ATM, and especially because you seem to have gone every route: teaching abroad is your best choice. Bar none. China, Taiwan, maybe even the Middle East for the $$ (it seems like you need some). If you need sources shoot me a PM, I'm a pro at living abroad by now, and you need not just the girls but the $$ by the looks of your situation.

I hate to say it, but you seem to have some innately social awkwardness that may be impossible to stave off. The others may have to confirm this after they Skype with you. The solution is to just live abroad. I had the same problem of having initially amazing interactions, but over time people would just ignore me ("and how do those 2 just talk for an hour straight??"). It took a couple years to shake off, but for you, don't try to fit a square peg into a round hole - live abroad.
.

[Comte De St. Germain]

I'm extremely interested in this as well. OP if you need someone else I'm more than happy to talk as well. Send me a pm. Not sure how much I can help(since you already have the big name posters helping you out), but I'll see what I can do.

[JWLZG]

(06-07-2014 02:55 PM)jtteop Wrote:  

I didn't expect my posting career on rooshvforum to start out like this but this is absolutely fascinating. The reason being that if it was just some aspergers person doing 3000 robot approaches then that's one thing, and even that would be pretty surprising if it didn't have any results but this guy has said:

"On this particular night, I felt so confident that I just walked up to a girl who was eating, sat down across the table from her, and just LOOKED at her, without saying a word. She immediately started smiling and giggling, and asking me about myself. We made deep, sensual eye contact. I was feeling like this was it – the girlfriend I’ve been waiting for all this time!"

No aspergers person would ever say something like that.

To me, it strikes me as off, and painful to read. Want to elaborate on that last point?

[Travesty]

Updates?

This guy has to be on McQueen's show if he implements legit help to success.

[Merenguero]

(06-09-2014 12:41 AM)Travesty444 Wrote:  

Updates?

I invited him to have lunch with me either this Tuesday or Friday, but he hasn't signed on since I sent him the P.M. I will be in Baltimore both of those days. I doubt there will be many opportunities for him to approach during lunch, although there is a complete knockout girl who either bartends or used to bartend at the venue I invited him to. Top percentage of a percent for the Baltimore/D.C. area. I haven't seen her work there in quite some time.

[Merenguero]

Dupe.

[gringochileno]

I agree with the people suggesting that you try harder at online game. There's no doubt it has certain limitations, but if your goal is to get laid with chicks who pass your boner test, I can't think of an easier method. Get your ass on OKCupid and Tinder and run Tuth's first date bang recipe 10 times, and I defy you not to get your dick wet. Seriously, some of the chicks I've hooked up with off the internet have been such easy lays that I'm confident somebody with absolutely terrible game could have gotten the notch just by following the recipe.

[Suits]

I'm actually on pins and needles to see how this will turn out.

[jtteop]

(06-09-2014 12:30 AM)JWLZG Wrote:  

(06-07-2014 02:55 PM)jtteop Wrote:  

I didn't expect my posting career on rooshvforum to start out like this but this is absolutely fascinating. The reason being that if it was just some aspergers person doing 3000 robot approaches then that's one thing, and even that would be pretty surprising if it didn't have any results but this guy has said:

"On this particular night, I felt so confident that I just walked up to a girl who was eating, sat down across the table from her, and just LOOKED at her, without saying a word. She immediately started smiling and giggling, and asking me about myself. We made deep, sensual eye contact. I was feeling like this was it – the girlfriend I’ve been waiting for all this time!"

No aspergers person would ever say something like that.

To me, it strikes me as off, and painful to read. Want to elaborate on that last point?

I was just saying that deep, sensual eye contact is not the strong suit of people with aspergers therefore that is unlikely to be the problem.

Since I've never even seen a picture of the guy, much less a video of him speaking then it's all just assumption at this stage. But my guess is something to do with his core personality and manifestation as an sexual/emotional being.

[JWLZG]

I won't fault you for that. From experience their attempting to convey ocular expressions like that may result as confrontational and creepy.

AS simply isn't a catch-all synonym for poor social functioning though. There's a whole set of neurological symptoms associated with it and we shouldn't play armchair psychologist attempting to diagnose him. Not having the time to analyse his...autobiography...at the moment, I've discerned enough to see that something is very off in the way he's approaching life. People with ASD are generally wired differently, like I mentioned, in the way they think and see the world.
Which isn't a sole qualifier, of course. But the OP's recent ventures in life appear to be solely for the purpose of getting laid. I can understand if it's out of desperation, and it can be hard to shake yourself out of that mindset if you're not getting any. And I'm sure you're not the only person on this forum with that affliction -- maybe not to the same degree.

But if that sort of headspace is ruling your actions and directions in life, I can tell you people will notice. And it'll drive people away like the plague. It's almost obsessive. If your predicament is that bad it's affecting your non-sexual/romantic relationships (friends, family, colleagues) it might be more than a game problem.

It definitely looks like he needs to call in the heavy artillery though. OP, you mentioned that in addition to height and baldness, you're out of shape, too? What about dressing, sleep habits, diet etc.?

[thegreenman]

Update for 6/9:



JWLZG:
Yes, the headspace of "I need a woman right now" has definitely been ruling my life for the last 10+ years. I'm well aware of the negative consequences of being so needy - I've read my fill of game gurus saying neediness kills attraction. I get that. But I don't know what to DO about it.

Any tactic I try, for distracting myself or finding satisfaction in other ways besides women, backfires. Cause it's really just this: "I need to stop needing a woman, so that I can be less needy, and get a woman!!"

I meditate, I've tried developing hobbies... but when I try new activities, the whole time I'm thinking "This hobby better distract me from the need for chicks, because otherwise, I'll never get any chicks!"

And: "Hmm, has my need for sex gone away yet? Well I better keep up this hobby so that my need for sex goes away... is it gone yet? No.... is it gone yet? No.... FUCK THIS I WANT A WOMAN RIGHT NOW" [puts down hobby, throw it in the trash, goes out to the mall to approach chicks]

On diet/exercise/sleep:
My diet is really healthy. I eat tons of organic, raw veggies, tons of raw greens, extremely little processed chemicals, plenty of fruit, tea, and other antioxidants, and a low amount of meat (I shoot for vegetarian, but am concerned that being 100% veggie might deprive me of some nutrient(s), so I eat SOME meat, but a fraction of what the average person does, cause the average Murr'kin eats probably ten times the protein that their body even uses, and most of it comes from genetically modified animals that have 3 heads). I get plenty of sleep - I almost never have to wake up early, so sleep is rarely an issue.

Exercise though - that's probably the weakest link. I'm not exactly sedentary, because I do a lot of hiking. But it's not particularly strenuous. Developing a consistent exercise routine is something I've been wanting to do for a long, long time, but don't ever seem to do. Every day I wake up and think "I'm going to do some running today!", and then I never do it. For some reason I just fucking HATE doing anything physical. I don't know WHY. But whenever I'm purely "out of my head" and "in my body", it's the most uncomfortable feeling. It fucking SUCKS to be in my body. I don't know where this issue came from. I try to exercise, I write down my routine, I write x reps of this activity, x reps of that, x minutes of this, x minutes of that, and then I just stare at the fucking paper. I command my legs to get up and start doing it, and it's like my whole body refuses. I shout "OK! TIME TO DO SOME FUCKING EXERCISE! And my body doesn't move. This has been going on for YEARS. I want to exercise. I want to do it every day. But something about being physical unleashes this torrent of negative... emotion? I don't know what it is. But whatever it is, it shuts down everything. I suspect that this is intricately related to my issues with getting physical with women.

When I was in college, I went to the gym. Consistently. I started getting some pretty decent muscles. I could lift more and more each time I went. But after college, when I started traveling and moving around (and always on the verge of being broke), it didn't make sense to join any gyms. Why join a gym, if I'm not going to be in this geographic area a month from now? I'll have 11 months left on the membership, and have to fend off collector calls. (this has happened, and I still get calls from time to time).

The only time I'm able to exercise without being extremely uncomfortable, is when I'm doing it alongside a girl. Then the discomfort associated with physicality goes away.

And style - I dont really have a style. Jeans, t-shirts... thats it basically. I explained my relationship to clothing in an earlier post - I'll reproduce it here:

Style
Which brings us to style. I just don’t even know where to begin with that. My fashion process consists of a repeating cycle that goes as follows:
1. Look at my wardrobe, feel awkward and uncomfortable about every item in it
2. Go to the mall to shop for new clothes.
3. See something that (I think at the time) looks good, buy it and a few other things
4. The new item gets worn one time, and I feel uncomfortable in it
5. I don’t wear it again, and it sits in the wardrobe untouched for months
6. I can’t stand to look at it anymore, so I give it away to a clothing donation center
7. Repeat step 1

Often times I’ll read men’s fashion websites or magazines if I see one laying around. And I can’t understand what’s in it – to me it’s like reading an alien language. The only things I glean from it are names of brands and stores to go to – but once I GET to those stores or brand racks, I have no idea which items will look good on myself. Sometimes I’ll take a shot in the dark, and buy one. And then the cycle repeats in the way described above.
So, after a period of simplification in my life, I now go with simple jeans and t-shirts. That’s what I wear all the time. I might wear my one remaining collared shirt when I go to church, but other than that, it’s just jeans and t-shirts.





Ok now, on to the update from Saturday's festival!

I met up with an RVF user who, for whatever reason, wishes to remain anonymous (don't ask me why, I don't know his reason). We met up at a bar Friday night, and chatted for an hour or so, and he told me about an outdoor music/art festival the next day. So I went and met him and his girlfriend there. They went up on a hill where there were a few groups of people sitting around, and they started chillin together. There is something to be said for "warm" approaches... these people accepted me just because I was "with" the two they were talking to. I'd have to do 20 or more cold approaches to get lucky with that level of instant acceptance. One of the girls in the group started talking to me about a topic that I'm very interested in /knowledgable about, so I got into a conversation with her about it. I was very careful not to seem "overenthusiastic", and to play it cool, and just let her ask me questions about it. I couldn't do any kino at the time, because there was a person in between us. (in case you're having trouble picturing this, it was a group conversation, with everyone sitting down, and at some point in the conversation, I "singled" the girl out for a 1-1 discussion amidst the greater group conversation.) Let's call the girl "Sally".

When Sally's group got up to begin making their way out of the festival, (it was about 9pm, and the festival only lasted until 10pm), I walked with them (RVFguy+gf had already gone back to the stage/dance area earlier). While I was walking with the group, one of the guys started talking to me, and I sorta got the feeling he was either gay or bi or something, and interested in me. I found out that the whole group, Sally included, identified as "pansexual". I asked them what exactly that means, and we got into a discussion about it. Unfortunately, Sally drifted off with two of her friends, and got into seperate conversations with them, while I was sorta "trapped" in conversation with the dude. I didn't want to just be like "dude, leave me alone" and then go over to Sally again, because they were all part of the same group - it wasn't like he was just a random guy out of nowhere. The discussion became interesting though, because I told him that I view the whole "gender identity" thing as a religion, one which I'm reluctant to believe in. I did tell him that I think it's perfectly natural for people of the same sex to love one another - it's called "friendship", and it's been around since the beginning of time, and it doesn't mean that there's something fundamentally different about that person's sexuality. Everyone is naturally wired to *mate*, and mating is an exclusively opposite-sex phenomenon (two men can't *mate*, no matter how much they love eacother and no matter how many federal court rulings say they can), and the mating drive is the source of sexuality - so it just doesn't make sense for people of the same gender to try to have sex with eachother. I could tell that this line of thinking was new to him, and he had never pondered it before. Surprisingly, he seemed pretty open-minded to my ideas, and thanked me for sharing, and seemed willing to consider the concept of heterosexuality - and the irony of that was not lost on me, although perhaps it was on him.

While we were talking, Sally came back over and joined us. We talked for a bit, and then the rest of them left to go home - and it was just me and Sally left. We sat on the grass and watched the show, and I shared my falafel wrap with her. I got her laughing, giggling, having a good time. It turns out we share a lot of interests, and think in similar ways. In the back (ok, maybe more like the middle, or, fuck it, the front) of my mind I was thinking she might be girlfriend material.

But when I tried to start touching, I just couldn't figure out how to do it. I didn't know how to initiate that first touch. Where do I touch her? What part of her body? When? Do I do it while I'm talking, and pretend to just "accidently" brush her arm with my hand in the middle of a gesture? Do I firmly lay my hand on her shoulder or somewhere while making direct eye contact, as if to say "yeah I know I'm touchin you, I'm a MAN, and you like it don't ya bitch?" Do I use a dumb, RSD-type excuse like "palm reading"? (on a side note, whenever I do palm reading, I'm always left with the same conundrum after the reading is over - I let go of her hand, and then NOW WHAT? Back to square fucking one!!!) How the fuck do I start touching!!!!!

So by the end of the night (which was only about 30 minutes later), I hadn't touched her except one time - I put my hand on her shoulder for a split second. I got her number, and extended an open invitation to take her hiking with me (we had talked about it earlier).

Her situation was that she was depending on RVFguy for a ride home, so she had nowhere to go, until he was ready to leave. Since he was busy dancing with his gf, she had no one to hang out with except for me. she might have just been staying with me because there was no one else she knew to talk to. I didn't count any IOI's the entire time, except for the one IOI of "she's still talking to me", which I just explained could have been simply because she had no other options. She didn't kino me, she didn't ask me questions about myself, and when we moved from one spot to another, she walked way out ahead, while I dragged behind (I had a backpack, plus food and drink, which I had to figure out how to carry, and while I was figuring it out, she just walked way out in front and lost me in the crowd. that kind of shit. I found her again easily, but I had taken the point that "she's not waiting for me, she doesn't think of us as "together" in any way shape or form.)

When I texted her the next day, I got a "who's this?" response. She was lukewarm (actually scratch that, lukecold), and displayed no interest in putting in even 0.00001% effort to be with me. So after all is said and done, I conclude that she's not into me, and I shouldn't waste my time thinking about her anymore.

That's how it goes with most girls. They're having a good time when I'm there (or at least that's how it seems), smiling, giggling... but don't put in one DROP of effort to be with me, or to let me know that they're interested. It's like two people riding a multi-person bicycle - I'm doing ALL of the peddling, and the girl is just sitting there riding along. No matter how far we go, she won't peddle, and the moment I stop peddling, the bike stops. She does NOTHING. And when the bike does stop, she gets off and says "well it was nice meeting you!"

And sometimes I'll look back and see that the girl has ALREADY gotten off at some unidentified point in time, and I'm like fuck, when did she get off?


So that's my update for the weekend. I'm meeting merenguero tomorrow for lunch.

[Merenguero]

thegreenman:
I haven't read through your whole post, but with regard to the financial issues surrounding a gym membership, you can join Planet Fitness for $10.00 a month and they have them all over. For $20.00 a month, you can use any Planet Fitness location.

[Simeon_Strangelight]

Great, that you are meeting other RVF members, though in order to get any progress he has to see you in action and find out how to improve your Game.

A good way to initiate physical contact is via Eye Contact http://heartiste.wordpress.com/2012/08/0...act-game/. Krauser also has some good stuff on it in his work.

[Travesty]

It is obvious and plain daylight escalation is the dead zone for OP.

Touch a girl's upper arm to reinforce a point, joke, or tease during conversation.

If she has hand jewelry, lightly grab her hand and ask about it while looking at her jewelry and switching to some warm eye contact on and off.

Those are the lightest moves I can think of.

[Truth Teller]

thegreenman:

I'm willing to bet that your problems are positioning and over-thinking. The fact that you're thinking so much about touching shows how fucked your mind is with all this material. You have very bad paralysis by analysis. Hell, your posts reflect it. You have a way of saying very little with a lot of words. If you do that when you approach, that shows nervousness.

I'm not trying to insinuate anything here, but are you actually listening to the woman, or are you just waiting for her to stop talking? That can be another huge issue. Calibration is so fucking important that I can't overstate it. If you're uncalibrated, you just come off as being strange.

As for over-thinking, it's really simple. I'm sure you have a lot of material, because I doubt that you've made 3000 approaches and not changed what you do. Hell, I've probably made 100-200, and I've refined what I do. So here's what you need to do, at least in my opinion.

Look at all your material. Pick ONE system or "guru" to follow. Learn the material and apply it. If you want to mix and match systems/information, then make sure it's compatible. I would never mix routine-based stuff with natural game based stuff. They're not really compatible.

[Bland]

Quote:

Whenever I'm purely "out of my head" and "in my body", it's the most uncomfortable feeling.

I know you said this with regard to working out, but I think this could be a major source of your difficulties with women. Based on what you've said and my own experiences, I interpret being "in your head" as carrying on an internal monologue. Most of the day, when I'm working or just walking along thinking, I have an internal monologue that plays out in my mind. I understand this to be quite normal, but in order to have genuine interactions with people you need to stop the internal monologue and just be in the moment.

People can tell something is a bit off if you are thinking, "Ok, should I say this or that next?" or "Should I touch her arm now?" rather than being in the moment with them. Also, consider when you do succeed, and you are having sex with a great woman. Will you being thinking to yourself, "Wow. Finally. This is great," the whole time? I think you will enjoy it much more if you just allow yourself to be in the moment.

I think I'm echoing some things that Truth Teller said, and I agree with his prescription:

Quote:

Pick ONE system or "guru" to follow. Learn the material and apply it.

But I'd take things one step further. I think your first step should be to forget all the material and practice being in the moment around women. I think this will be easiest to do around women who you aren't interested in. So I think you should make some female friends for this purpose. If you practice this enough, it will become second nature.


Alcohol is another thing that helps to get people out of their heads and into the moment. So I would second this:

(06-08-2014 08:53 AM)Cyclone Wrote:  

Quote:

Alcohol, to me, isn’t liquid courage like it is for others. I’ve got the courage already. What alcohol does for me is it makes me go to SLEEP. After one or two drinks, my eyelids start to close, and all I want to do is just slink back in my chair and doze off.

Are you sure you're not drinking beer, but hard liquor as well? Beer is what makes you pass out, but shots like vodka and rum should keep you up and active.

And I would add that you should try Redbull and Vodka. There's no way you'll feel sleepy after one or two of those.


Finally, I want to say something about hobbies. You say that when you try hobbies you are still fixated on women. My suggestion would be to focus on hobbies that help move you towards you goals with women. For example, weight training is a hobby that makes you more attractive to women as you get more fit. So if weight training is your hobby, rather than thinking, "Why won't this hobby help me forget about women?" you can think about how the hobby is moving you towards your goals with women. Weight training is great because seeing your progress both on the barbell and in the mirror is a boon for your confidence, but there are other examples of hobbies that will help you with women. You mentioned your interest in politics. Well, accumulating political power is probably an even better way to increase your prospects with women than building muscle.

[thegreenman]

Hmmmm.......


I was reading over the previous posts, and I came back to one written by DistantLight, in which he said the following:

Quote:


not once have you mentioned giving women the opportunity to be sexual with you. Not a single opportunity for her to kiss yiu, flirt, be isolated or play around.

This little thought is fascinating to me right now. It's different than anything else I've seen so far, in that it doesn't quite make total sense to me, yet I have this intuition that in it lies a key to breaking through my issue.

DistantLight, could you expand on this?

[Truth Teller]

(06-09-2014 06:53 PM)Bland Wrote:  

But I'd take things one step further. I think your first step should be to forget all the material and practice being in the moment around women. I think this will be easiest to do around women who you aren't interested in. So I think you should make some female friends for this purpose. If you practice this enough, it will become second nature.

I agree, and this is partially why I think inner game is so important. You can memorize a ton of lines and routines and shit and get laid. It does happen. However, you're thinking about "what should I do next?" most of the time.

In my opinion and (limited) experience, once you get the inner game and basic tactics down, things become a lot easier. You just go up to her and start spitting game without thinking about things. On another note, there's always "what do I say next?" as an anxiety.

The bar for what you talk about is SO FUCKING LOW that you don't need to ever worry about it. I've talked to a woman about a fucking James Bond poster.

[Giovonny]

I Skyped with him last night.

I was expecting to see an ugly, socially awkward man.

I was wrong!

This guy is average to above average looking, fun to talk to, and socially aware.

He just doesn't have much sexual experience.

He is a smart guy.

But, he is uneducated sexually.

He needs to learn the art of sex.

We talked about some strategies to help him learn the art of sex.

It can't really be learned over the internet, it can't really be learned by talking about it.

It has to be experienced physically.

He needs a sex coach-girlfriend-lover-intimate companion who can instruct him.

A woman who can guide him through this process.

We talked about how to find such a woman.

Sex therapists, sex workers, sex coaches, etc.

I'm sure there are many women who would be willing to help this guy learn sex.

The hardest part will be finding a good teacher who is sincere.

I would go somewhere where prostitution is legal.

I would be honest about my issue.

I would get help. Sexual help.

That is what this man needs.

Sexual experience.

I recommended that he go to SEA and get a few girlfriends.

*****

This guy proves that "approaching girls" is only one small part of the sexual process.

After the approach, there is still conversation, maintaining conversation, texting/calling, more conversation, dating, escalating, closing, sex, etc.

There are many aspects to this process of getting sex.

We must be work on all of these aspects.

*****

I get the sense that he can be more aggressive.

I get the sense that he can upgrade his fashion and style.

I get the sense that he can put himself into a better "fishbowl'.

[No Habit]

So he is just lacking on the physical part?

[Merenguero]

(06-10-2014 12:25 PM)Giovonny Wrote:  

I Skyped with him last night.

I was expecting to see an ugly, socially awkward man.

I was wrong!

This guy is average to above average looking, fun to talk to, and socially aware.

He just doesn't have much sexual experience.

He is a smart guy.

But, he is uneducated sexually.

He needs to learn the art of sex.

We talked about some strategies to help him learn the art of sex.

It can't really be learned over the internet, it can't really be learned by talking about it.

It has to be experienced physically.

He needs a sex coach-girlfriend-lover-intimate companion who can instruct him.

A woman who can guide him through this process.

We talked about how to find such a woman.

Sex therapists, sex workers, sex coaches, etc.

I'm sure there are many women who would be willing to help this guy learn sex.

The hardest part will be finding a good teacher who is sincere.

I would go somewhere where prostitution is legal.

I would be honest about my issue.

I would get help. Sexual help.

That is what this man needs.

Sexual experience.

I recommended that he go to SEA and get a few girlfriends.

*****

This guy proves that "approaching girls" is only one small part of the sexual process.

After the approach, there is still conversation, maintaining conversation, texting/calling, more conversation, dating, escalating, closing, sex, etc.

There are many aspects to this process of getting sex.

We must be work on all of these aspects.

*****

I get the sense that he can be more aggressive.

I get the sense that he can upgrade his fashion and style.

I get the sense that he can put himself into a better "fishbowl'.

I met him today and second everything Giovonny wrote. He's not socially awkward and I really doubt that he has Asperger's, as I think someone suggested earlier in the thread.

[eradicator]

For the OP, you might try out a new feature of e-harmony, called 'e-harmony plus'. It costs $5000 but you get the services of one of their matchmakers. It is basically someone who you talk to on phone and skype that works for e-harmony, you tell them what you want, what you have to offer, any deal breakers(religion, distance, etc) and they will go through the entire e-harmony database and will talk to women for you to see if they are a possible match for you and set you up on dates with them.

I have not done this, but it might end up being cheaper than going to thailand. I have no idea if this feature is even going to last or if there are any success stories, because it is so new. But it sounds like you are a decent looking guy, with some means, and good social awareness but zero experience or confidence with women or sex. If you hire their matchmaker services, I would be totally honest with them about everything they ask so they will better be able to try to get you what you want.