[cardguy]

Quote:

“Beauty is unbearable, drives us to despair, offering us for a minute the glimpse of an eternity that we should like to stretch out over the whole of time.”

― Albert Camus

In his brilliant book 'Millions of Women are Waiting to Meet You', the writer Sean Thomas has the best description of the effects female beauty has over a male. Below is an excerpt from the book. I was astonished when I read this since it perfectly captured something I thought could never be described in words.

Quote:

When I was on a trip to Iceland about ten years ago, I remember standing on the harbourfront in Reykjavik, and looking at the blue fjord north of the city. Across the choppy blue waves was a glacier, maybe twelve or twenty miles away - a big, dirty white tongue of ice crashing down from the bald black mountains with infinite slowness. Intrigued, I asked some hungover local about the glacier, its name and whereabouts. He told me the name of the glacier. The he told me the name of the sea-channel: Faxafloi. But then he addded that the glacier wasn't twenty miles away, it was two hundred miles away. The air in Iceland, he explained, is so clear and unpolluted, things look nearer than they are.

I turned and looked again at the glacier, framed by the imperial blue waters of the fjord. I felt a bloodrush in my heart. The scenary was so breathtaking, and so majestic - I was moved and gratified - and yet I was obscurely troubled at the same time. The sense of unexpected distance was dizzying and confusing as well as exhillarating.

This may seem far-fetched as an analogy, but it's the best I can do. The feeling I had by that fjord is, somehow, the same weak and head-spinning feeling I get when I look at a truly beautiful woman.

He continues by discussing an incident involving the lesbian writer, Camille Paglia. I will take the account of this from a blog that discusses it since I don't have the book to hand (indeed the excerpt above was taken from GOOGLE books).

Quote:

In his brutally honest and fascinating book Millions Of Women Are Waiting To Meet You, Sean Thomas does his best to describe how he feels. He refers to it as

"that eerie sensation when you witness someone truly beautiful: that strange and sad feeling; that doomy vertigo."

He also recounts the experience of Camille Paglia, a lesbian writer, who once had an injection of testosterone for a medical complaint and on walking out into the streets of Manhattan looked at a pretty young girl and

"felt this sudden crippling urge, this desperate sad lungingness, this feebleness. Then, and only then, did she understand the power of male desire, which is of course a function of the power of female beauty."

It is interesting to consider that women will never truly understand the affect that their beauty has on men. The blogger above suggests it is similar to the affect a baby has on a woman. Something which men will never truly understand.

As for the Sean Thomas book. It is well worth reading. It is a recount of his experiences in dating - after being set the challenge of trying out online dating for the first time (by the newspaper he was employed by). And along the way he shares observations and advice which are really insightful when it comes to scoring with women.

[Therapsid]

Do you consider hot young women the pinnacle of beauty? Because that quote about the Icelandic fjord seems to suggest that its conceivable.

Since I pose the question, I'm not even sure of my own answer. But it's worth contemplating. My visceral instinct is to say no.

Men have risked their lives, even to the point of virtually flipping a coin on their near-term survival, for the sake of conquering nature's extremes. I believe, contrary to crude Darwinian theory, that they were expressing their belief that there's beauty in this world higher than the hottest Brazilian model. Were they wrong? Maybe.

[scorpion]

A beautiful woman produces this stunning effect because she is the literal embodiment of the human ideal. When you see a truly beautiful woman in person, you briefly experience a hint of humanity's greatest potential. You essentially receive a concentrated drug hit of life itself. A beautiful woman is life, not in the sense that she is the meaning of life, but that she is the physical embodiment of life, the most utterly pure and concrete form of the abstract notion of what it means to be alive. It's an almost mystical experience in that it feels otherworldly. Beautiful women, when seen in contrast with the unremarkable appearance of the average woman, seem almost to be heavenly creatures. A beautiful woman can be, literally, intoxicating.

Beautiful women are even more captivating because we instinctively understand (even if we do not believe) how fleeting their beauty will be. Women will usually peak in their beauty somewhere between the age of 16-21 depending on the individual, and will maintain that peak for 2-3 years at best. After that the slow decline begins until the wall hits, then it's all over. It's like a slow drip of paint that covers the Mona Lisa, then finally an entire bucket splattered on top. Because we have foreknowledge of her inevitable and impending decay, experiencing a beautiful woman in her prime is thus almost like cheating death, and is nearly as exhilarating.

I should add that what I'm talking about cannot be achieved by looking at a photoshopped picture of any random hot girl, or watching a porno. When I talk about experiencing a beautiful woman, it has to be in person, and it has to be with a young woman whose personality matches her appearance. She must still possess a certain naivety of the world. She must be carefree in a way that is impossible for a man to understand. She must feel as if her beauty will never fade. Only then, in that brief window, does she shine beyond all else. Only then does she truly express something that cannot be experienced in any other way. The combination of flawless beauty and youthful insouciance: a taste of immortality, if only for a moment.

[Kabal]

Lolita is filled with excellent descriptions (some of the best in the English language), albeit for the most part it's about a young teenage girl:

Quote:

and I looked and looked at her, and knew as clearly as I know I am to die, that I loved her more than anything I had ever seen or imagined on earth, or hoped for anywhere else. She was only the faint violet whiff and dead leaf echo of the nymphet I had rolled myself upon with such cries in the past; an echo on the brink of a russet ravine, with a far wood under a white sky, and brown leaves choking the brook, and one last cricket in the crisp weeds . . . but thank God it was not that echo alone that I worshipped. What I used to pamper among the tangled vines of my heart, mon grand pèchè radieux, had dwindled to its essence: sterile and selfish vice, all that I canceled and cursed. You may jeer at me, and threaten to clear the court, but until I am gagged and half-throttled, I will shout my poor truth. I insist the world know how much I loved my Lolita, this Lolita, pale and polluted, and big with another's child, but still gray-eyed, still sooty-lashed, still auburn and almond, still Carmencita, still mine; Changeons de vie, ma Carmen, allons vivre quelque part oû nous ne serons jamais sèparès; Ohio? The wilds of Massachusetts? No matter, even if those eyes of hers would fade to myopic fish, and her nipples swell and crack, and her lovely young velvety delicate delta be tainted and torn--even then I would go mad with tenderness at the mere sight of your dear wan face, at the mere sound of your raucous young voice, my Lolita.

[cardguy]

Nice responses...

And I love this quote. I am going to memorise this one:

Quote:

It's like a slow drip of paint that covers the Mona Lisa, then finally an entire bucket splattered on top.

I put together this thread since the quote from the book put into words that sense of falling into the void which I have never heard described so well.

It is a visceral reaction that I get around a beautiful woman. And there is always a sense of sadness in that feeling.

I love beautiful women - but I am a bit of a geek. The things that inspire me the most are beautiful writing, beautiful music, amazing films and clever philosophical ideas. I am an expert in close up magic - and some of the strategies I have learned has also given me more joy than any woman.

But - the feeling you get around a beautiful woman is unique. It is like seeing a ghost (not that I believe in them). If you experienced it - it would be impossible to communicate unless you experienced it yourself.

So much of philosophy breaks down into the way we try and map language on to our experiences. And the above is a nice attempt at this.

And at the end of the day - it is just hormones we are experiencing. And one of the mysteries of being alive is trying to unearth some higher meaning to such feelings. But from the point of view of nature - it is no more profound than stubbing your toe.

Personally - I take the Witgenstein approach. The limits of my language are the limits of my world. And some things can only be shown and not said. So - even language itself is often incapable of capturing certain feelings.

As such - I try not to get too wrapped up in female beauty. I experience it and enjoy it. But - I don't hold out any higher ideal when thinking about such experiences. My main reaction is one of sadness. At how temporary such beauty is. And how no man will can ever satiate his desire for female beauty. Hell - I bet even George Clooney gets these random longings as well.

And undercutting that sadness is an awareness that women will never truly understand these feelings they inspire. Which seems like God's way of laughing at us.

[Balboa]

Interesting quote from Sean Thomas. Beauty is mysterious, because it comes in so many different forms.
A beautiful woman, viewed by a man - that's easily explicable in evo psych terms. But the sight of snow-capped mountains? The music of a lute heard in a Roman African ruin at sunset? A mind-blowing mathematical formula, suddenly understood? These all have nothing to do with reproduction, yet produce intense experiences.

[Que enspastic]

put lots of very beautiful women around and you get used to it.

[cardguy]

On top of all this.

Men know to act cool when around a beautiful girl in public (except for the occasional glance).

So - even from seeing our body language - other women have no sense of the strange torment that occurs in the hearts of men when around a beautiful girl.

I experienced this yesterday in Starbucks. The lady serving me cut me an amused look - since the girl she had just served was a total '10/10' stunner.

I had half a smirk on my face as well (since I know the girl serving me). But - that half a smirk was a total fabrication of the strange wanderlust I felt around the beautiful women.

As such - the chick serving me - probably thought I felt no different to how I would feel when admiring a nice car.

She literally has no idea...

[Greek kamaki]

It has all to do with hormonal stimulation.After you have shot your load even the most gorgeous woman does not move you.

[cardguy]

Yeah I have noticed that.

The funny thing - is that your hormone levels drop just before you come.

So for a second or two - just as you are about to shoot your load - you can feel your interest in the chick suddenly fall away.

You would think it would be a second or two after cumming. But it is actually a second or two before cumming.

[speakeasy]

One of the most depressing thoughts in the world is that even the most captivatingly beautiful woman you will see eventually meet this fate:



Beauty is temporary and fleeting. It only exists long enough to attract a mate and pass on genetic code during her most fertile years. Those with the most fit genes will evoke the strongest mating responses in males and allow her the widest choice of males with which to pass on her DNA. That's the only purpose beauty serves, to lure men into mating. All of this magic we feel upon seeing great beauty is nothing but chemicals firing in our brains as they were programmed to do going long back in our evolution.

[cardguy]

Jean Shrimpton.

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/tvshowbiz/art...nwall.html









TODAY:

[cardguy]

Interesting interview with Jean Shrimpton here. She was the world's first supermodel. And then decided - in her early thirties - to turn her back on the world of modelling.

http://www.guardian.co.uk/theguardian/20...-shrimpton

[speakeasy]

Quote:

She has always been honest about loathing the ageing process, telling the Daily Mail ten years ago: ‘I lie in bed sometimes and think “ugh”, I don’t like my looks at all.’

...

She said recently: ‘I am a melancholy soul.

'I’m not sure contentment is obtainable and I find the banality of modern life terrifying. I sometimes feel I’m damaged goods.’

This is the Achilles heel of beauty. Many extraordinarily beautiful women never had to really develop a personality. Or have a view of themselves that wasn't based around the value of their personal appearance. We can't even begin to imagine what that's like as men, to have shit handed to you from the time you are a teen because you are attractive. Never having to break a sweat, having wealthy people throwing you money, constant adoration, invitation to the world's best parties, fame. All because of what you look like. When I see a stunner who comes off as humble and well-adjusted and actually has mental pursuits that have nothing to do with her career, I have a true admiration for her. But if they haven't developed this, their fate is aging cadaverous shells, withering away. Bitter and broken. I hate cliches but it's true, beauty can shine from within, in a sense.

[Teutatis]

(07-13-2013 01:29 AM)cardguy Wrote:  

On top of all this.

Men know to act cool when around a beautiful girl in public (except for the occasional glance).

So - even from seeing our body language - other women have no sense of the strange torment that occurs in the hearts of men when around a beautiful girl.
...

This... Women really have no idea of the torments inside our minds.

[Teutatis]

(07-13-2013 02:34 AM)speakeasy Wrote:  

Beauty is temporary and fleeting. It only exists long enough to attract a mate and pass on genetic code during her most fertile years. Those with the most fit genes will evoke the strongest mating responses in males and allow her the widest choice of males with which to pass on her DNA. That's the only purpose beauty serves, to lure men into mating. All of this magic we feel upon seeing great beauty is nothing but chemicals firing in our brains as they were programmed to do going long back in our evolution.

Absolutely true, but knowing it doesn't prevent you from feeling it. I know the purpose of beauty and sex rationally, and yet when you see a beautiful women you will still feel attracted and entranced, you really can't stop it from happening.

[Nolecbo]

I thought the thread was going to be this quote:

Beauty, unlike the rest of the gifts handed out at birth, does not require dedication, patience and hard work to pay off. But it's also the only gift that does not keep on giving. - Paulina Porizkova

[j r]

Am I the only one who doesn't have these feelings? When I see a beautiful woman, I'm not thinking about human perfection. I'm thinking, "I'd like to hit that."

Maybe it's because I was a nerdy teenager and got no attention from women until I was in college. I became familiar with books and music and art before I became familiar with women. If I want to dwell on the human potential for greatness, I put on Beethoven's 9th or The Godfather or read a bit of Shakespeare.

The whole idea of love at first sight has never made any sense to me. It's hard for me to have any sincere feelings and emotions for a woman who means nothing to me, no matter how great she looks.

[Teutatis]

Quote:

I'm thinking, "I'd like to hit that."

Lol, that's what all of us are thinking, no one is falling in love with her, just falling in lust.

[Kingsley Davis]

(07-13-2013 12:53 PM)Teutatis Wrote:  

Quote:

I'm thinking, "I'd like to hit that."

Lol, that's what all of us are thinking, no one is falling in love with her, just falling in lust.

Growing up with more female relations than any boy should ever have, will decimate the veneer of female beauty.

[scorpion]

I think the appreciation for beautiful, young women extends beyond animal sexuality and even beyond objective aesthetic admiration. Yes, both of those things are part of it, but there is also something deeper there. It's the same reason that a father is always tempted to spoil his pretty daughters rotten. A father with a daughter who is beautiful, innocent and charming cannot help but being captivated by her, and it's in a totally non-sexual way. There's just something about beauty that intoxicates and invigorates men.

Perhaps this is only something you can understand if you've experienced it, and it's hard to find girls who are both beautiful and innocent to the ways of the world these days. Our culture is so poisoned and drenched in sex that beautiful girls are corrupted even as children, and thus lose their innocence and naivety far too early.

[DLZ]

I know what all of you mean when it comes to appreciating female beauty, especially when you talk about seeing reflections of human potential in a girl's aesthetics. By definition, bedding a hard nine will make you feel several orders of magnitude better than seducing a seven.

But I'll play contrarian and posit that this is a dangerous line of thinking, leading down the road to pedestalization and pulling the wool over your eyes in the name of her beauty.

Part of inner game is fighting this natural tendency to exalt hot babes into these other-worldly realms and just treat them like you'd treat any other entitled person with an attitude. Fighting this comes in two distinct ways: Inundate yourself with so many beautiful women that they don't affect you or by sheer willpower. The paradoxical and depressing part of learning game is that the more women you sleep with, the less each individual girls' beauty captivates you and you don't savor it as much. A stunner might grab your attention and make your heart beat fast, but certainly not as much as she did when you had 5 notches instead of 50.

Men have a hamster as well, it just rationalizes the behaviour and "otherworldly" feelings a dimepiece gives you, instead of the female rationalization hamster which does the same for alpha dudes.

P.S. cardguy's pic makes me weep.

[Sp5]

From the excellent biography Captain Sir Richard Francis Burton.

Burton was an 19th century British explorer who learned several languages, went to Mecca as an Arab, found the source of the Nile, got his cheeks impaled by a Somali spear, bonked lots of women, etc.

Quote:

[Burton] liked women in general, whatever the race or color, and wrote that he rejected the theory that beauty is subjective, that, for example, the blackest of the black with the flattest nose would be the model of beauty only for the men of her own race. "My experience is distinctly the reverse: wherever in the four corners of the world I saw a pretty woman she was generally admired."

[Kingsley Davis]

(07-14-2013 02:10 AM)Sp5 Wrote:  

From the excellent biography Captain Sir Richard Francis Burton.

Burton was an 19th century British explorer who learned several languages, went to Mecca as an Arab, found the source of the Nile, got his cheeks impaled by a Somali spear, bonked lots of women, etc.

Quote:

[Burton] liked women in general, whatever the race or color, and wrote that he rejected the theory that beauty is subjective, that, for example, the blackest of the black with the flattest nose would be the model of beauty only for the men of her own race. "My experience is distinctly the reverse: wherever in the four corners of the world I saw a pretty woman she was generally admired."

So no African ever set foot at the source of the Nile until some European cat "found" it?

[Sp5]

(07-14-2013 02:32 AM)Kingsley Davis Wrote:  

So no African ever set foot at the source of the Nile until some European cat "found" it?

I don't know. Did they know that stream was the source of a river that went all of the way to the Mediterranean? That's the question, right?