Quote: (03-27-2013 10:06 AM)kosko Wrote:
Quote: (03-26-2013 03:28 AM)MrXY Wrote:
Bang her at her place or a hotel. I do it all the time.
Break this down. I've initiated it in the past but not here in Toronto. Would like to hear a fresh approach to how its done.
OK-I'll tell you guys how I handle it for my particular situation, that is different from most guys I'm sure, but you can take from me what is useful to you.
I think a lot of guys, especially less experienced players, don't try to bang girls in
hotels when it would be advantageous to do so because they fear the girl will be put off by the obvious sexual connotation of inviting her to your hotel and the "sleaziness" factor, and will have a strong negative reaction to the suggestion. It's totally understandable why a guy would think this, but in reality girls are far more amenable to going to a hotel than most guys would ever imagine. I get far more acceptances than refusals.
You need two elements 1) proper frame and 2) overcoming objections. Frame in this case means setting up a legitimate (non-sexual) reason why you are already at the hotel or going to be at the hotel. In my case, I live on one end of my beach town and do most of my pickup/dating activity on the other end, so it's maybe an 8 mile drive through town with lots of road construction while I've been drinking late at night. Sometimes, i will just go ahead and get a hotel, other times I will make a decision late at night if i think I shouldn't be driving. Girls accept this as a legit reason and it is a smart decision for me as well. What I don't tell them is that I also have a policy of rarely allowing girls to know where I live for privacy and security reasons.
In my case again, I do a lot of dating in small cities that are 30 minutes to up to 2 hours away from my own. I meet these women online. Sometimes i just drive back but other times I get a room in her city before I meet her, especially if I know that I might have a problem getting to go back to her place (has roommates, lives with parents, babysitter staying the night, etc) but I think I have a good chance of banging her otherwise.I carefully qualify her on all this beforehand through normal getting to know you type conversation via text and calls. I give her the same reason- don't want to drive back late when I'm sleepy and have been drinking. I mention the hotel casually late in the date after she has had a few drinks and we are getting along well. To do so any earlier would activate her defenses too much.
If you're staying in a city for business or travel you have a perfect ready made reason for why you're at a hotel. Of course, even if you live in the city, you can always
claim you're just visiting.
When it comes time to make a move, I just handle it as if I was asking them to come back to my place. I tell them I have something to drink at the room and ask if they want to have a quick nightcap and to watch a little TV. They know the deal- that she is going to a hotel room with a guy who is going to try to fuck her- but I have fed enough pellets to the hamster-that I got the room for legit nonsexual purposes and it's just a quick drink-that she can rationalize her behavior as not being slutty. Once back at the room, make her a drink immediately, turn on the TV, get on the bed and go for the kiss within 10-15 minutes max.
If you don't already have a room, the process is more difficult and you'll get more refusals at the venue if you say you're going to get a room as opposed to come back to my room. However, if you can get her to actually go to the hotel, while her waiting for you to check in is a bit of an uncomfortable situation, she is pretty much committed at that point and I've never had one back out once she was at the hotel.
And then there are the ones who are so DTF they don't need any excuses. About 3 months ago I was at one of my favorite bars when I saw a lone chick eyeing me hard. I opened her and before long we were making out at the bar and I found out she had separated from her husband two weeks before. Obviously she was in the bar looking for dick, so after an hour I outright asked her if she wanted to go to a hotel and she said yes.I drove her to a hotel 2 minutes away; of course she still gave me the "I never do this" routine but she never really resisted and we banged several times. Another example-three weeks ago an online chick I had been trying to get out to meet me for months finally agreed at the last minute and drove an hour from her town to meet me. A strong sign of horniness. We had a fun date and when it got late she stated mentioning going back to my place. I told her I was going to get a hotel because I didn't want to drive and that she was invited and she readily agreed. If a chick is giving you strong signs of DTFness-go for it-throw up any excuse to get a hotel and she will probably accept it.
Objections- the most common objection I get is "Are you married?" but of course I get this all the time anyway hotel or not since I don't let chicks come to my place. Hotel sex is associated with adultery in the female mind, I just look them in the eye and firmly say "No I'm not "(which is the truth) and repeat why I got the hotel-don't want to drink and drive etc. You have to be firm and self assured in your denial. Even if she still has her suspicions, she can now tell herself "He told me he wasn't married!"
Other objections are that "I've never done this before" (lie, unless she's really young), "This seems kind of weird" and similar. Don't take these objections seriously or try to argue with her, you will just give them more importance. Instead, don't respond or just say "It's fine" reassuringly and keep plowing forward with rambling talk to get her mind off the objections and keep moving her physically to the room.
The dirty little secret is that a lot of chicks
like a guy taking her to a hotel room and fucking her. It's a common scene in TV and films she's seen and probably a common female fantasy. It's exciting and naughty and we know that chicks are a lot dirtier and sleazier than they let on. A lot more of them have done it and are willing to do it than the average chump would ever imagine. Take charge, be confident, be smooth, and you can make it happen.
Note on
hotels: I avoid any place that looks rundown, sketchy, sleazy or is in a bad neighborhood. I use the mid range chains- Holiday Inn, La Quinta, Sleep Inn, Days Inn etc. They are decent and affordable, and have never had a girl object to them. I only stay at high end
hotels if I am meeting one of my regular girls there for a planned night of partying.