[Built to Fade]

About a week ago, I was out with friends and this decent looking married Asian we were with gave her sister in law's number to my friend after I left happy hour. I get her number from him and me and this girl (who my friends said was a 10.. yeah right I'm sure) agree to meet up yesterday. Anyways, last minute she hits me with..

Her: "I hope you wont be mad but I was in a car accident last weekend but we can meet another night. I have a lot to figure out before Monday. I'm sorry"
Me: "K but you should have let me know when I asked you earlier this week. Get well."

She lives about 30 mins away and I have never seen her so I could care less. I already had a sure thing waiting for me planned since yesterday (freshly divorced 30 something I keep around). I'll hit her up in a month or so next time I'm out there.

So I hit the bar and meet up with 2 guys I know and start my prowl. They were hammered. We have a hot half black bar tender that likes only white guys (I'm white) and they have been throwing lines at her all night. One of the guys that's just an acquaintance is trying way to hard (staring like a creeper) and just got divorced so I helped coach him (he was saying needy shit like 'where u going?!', 'don't forget about me' all kinds of dumb needy shit) and already tried to get her digits within being there for 5 seconds by telling her he was going to taco bell.

Anyways my friends leave to smoke a cig and this fatter version of Anna Nicole Smith walks up and she says shes in town til Tuesday and shes with her cousin, not BF. So I grab her number and I'll call her tomorrow just to see if I can get a quick bang before she leaves town to who knows.

So the bar tender, I give about an 8.5, is feeling good cause my boys are all over her so I start attacking her value subtly like ignoring her, looking away when all my boys are talking to her (denying attention), raising my glass for a drink and not asking... just keepin it cool. Her defense to the creeper was she has a BF but I could careless and naturally the other dude cared. So here's the good part.

I rip ass right there in the bar. I mean it was noticeable haha and I don't know what it was from but I did it on the other side of the bar from her as she was talking to me. 2 other guys next to us were with a chick (7.5) and I could tell she wasn't with them just there as friends. So one of the ass holes is like "oh this guy did it" meaning me.

Me: "dude your the one pounding chilli cheese fries" and immediately everyone bursts out laughing and the 7.5 is pointing at him like her did it.

So I go on with my night and he says something about me (5 mins later, remember we are in a battle for ego) as I'm still sitting next to him. So I'm like dude you're still on this subject, get off it you loser or something to this effect. He wanted to kick my ass. So I burst out laughing about the whole thing for about 5 minutes (I was half drunk and wanted to break his ego). Mocked him when ever he said just drink my beer (mhmm this is good!) and was completely all smiles especially towards his lady friend. Well it worked like a charm. The last thing he said was "oh you are calling her a dick?" referring to the 7.5. I respond to him stating that "no I actually want you to introduce me to her".

The 7.5 look like she was struck by lightning and was completely in my hands. The guys got up and left and literally dragged her out by the arm.

The 8.5 bar tender saw the whole thing and I said to her as I got my tab:
Me: "I know if I gave you my number you would call me"
Her: "yeah I would"

So I didn't give it to her. I'll see her around and when I saw her put the creepers number in some kind of collection (maybe? that's what it looked like anyways) I said fuck that my number isn't going there. I left and went to the sure things house and finished my night on a high note.

Thoughts on my game with the bartender? Should I asked for the number so was it better I played it off..

[Perseus]

IMO your drunk buddies killed your shot with the bartender. She would've easily lumped you into their "beta" status. If you're a regular there, you played it safe so far, show up next time solo, and basically point out to her in a somewhat of an apologetic way (without saying sorry) that your buddies from the night before were mad wasted and that you felt they were being "creepy" to her, staring her up and down, etc.

From my experience, this could show her that you're not that kind of guy, gets outta control drunk and becomes a creeper/beta, you have better standards/class.

Also what worked for me the best with bartenders/strippers is the ability to RELATE to them, meaning that i would mention for e.g that i work as a waiter or at a starbucks to get myself into law school.

OR you can say that you have a best friend who is a female, and bartends at XYZ, but she's doing it to support her 2 year old daughter, as the father left without any traces of him, and she relies on you for emotional support/ blah blah blah.

Maybe she's on the same boat, working part-time/studying OR maybe in a similar situation the fake friend/daughter story.

Also, I've found that, the more humble i was (i.e not demonstrating high value a lot), the better the interaction would go with such workers.