[Knowledge Seeker]

Sorry for the length, but please bare with me.

This one attractive Colombian girl has been a "friend" of mine since my Junior year of college (over a year ago). I fucked up and showed beta tendencies early in our getting-to-know-each-other phase, leading to me being in the friend zone now. However, despite all of that, we've still kept one another around to hang out. While I've accepted the fact that I am just a "friend" in her eyes, she confuses me with her behaviors quite often that make me think otherwise.

Yesterday I went to visit her while her parents were out of town. We buy some alcohol and have a small get together with her friends. She becomes overly affectionate, overly touchy, and sends signals that would be highly misconstrued as "Fuck me tonight (even as friends)." Mind you, I don't show this chick any signs of affection whatsoever, sober or drunk.

Things she did:

- While I'm laying on her bed, she climbs on top of me (sober)
- Puts her arm around mine as we're walking to the store (sober)
- As I walk into her room while she is getting ready, she says "It's about time you see me naked." (sober)
- Tells me I can sleep over for the night (sober)
- Kept putting her knee on top of mine as we're sitting down at the dinner table (drunk)
- Gives me random hugs out of no where (drunk and sober)

As the night winds down, there's 5 people left at the house. One guy, her friend and his girlfriend, my "friend", and me. Everyone is almost GONE. She ends up going upstairs to lay down on her parent's bed because she's so high and drunk. So I'm rather hammered at this moment so I go follow her afterwards. I lay down next to her and she says "Matt's sleeping here tonight." (the other guy still at the house). So I ask her, "Where can I sleep then?" She replies, "My sister's room."

So after deliberating for 2 minutes in the other room, I get up and tell her "I'm going home." There way no way in hell I would get put myself through disrespect by sleeping in her sister's room while she's getting pounded by some other guy next door. What the fuck is wrong with this bitch?

I'm most certain she'll hit me up later today asking why I left. Should I even respond or just let it go? If I were to respond, I was going to say something along the likes of "I don't tolerate being disrespected and being misled. If we're "friends", act like it and don't give me wrong messages that make me look like a fucking idiot."

Appreciate the help.

[DareP]

I think there are a lot of subtle things going on that we can't really read through the forum. Have you considered the possibility that she gave you a lot of windows of opportunities, you just missed them and eventually she just decided to hook up with the other guy? For example:

Quote:

- While I'm laying on her bed, she climbs on top of me (sober)

That would be my cue to run my hand on her back, stroke her neck, play with her hair and - Makeout, next step, etc.

Anyway - It could be that she was disrespecting you; it could also be that she's just flirtatious and doesn't know what effect her behaviors have on you, it could be that she was into both of you and thought she gave you a window of opportunity already. It could also be that she's only kind of into you. As in, maybe you're not "her type" in the way she thinks of her type, but she's slightly attracted to you anyway and only acts on it when she's a little drunk.

All possibilities. You're really the only one who can read into the situation for real.

[Jackhammer]

She's just using you to boost her ego. The most effective way to bang this girl (or just torment her) is to give another female your sexual attention, preferably in front of her, and shrug off this girl's advances from now on.

Basically you should "friendzone" her...turn the tables.

[Built to Fade]

Well the first thing I noticed is it's your senior year and you will probably be leaving the area after college so she could just want to bang her before you leave. She sounds very 'open' and if you haven't capitalized on her on top of you in bed and if shes around you at times completely shit faced then this may be a lost cause because you are truly in the friend zone. I agree with Jackhammer when he said you need to bring other girls around...

Personally, I would bang her friends.. Not just one, seriously go for all of them. If she texts, act normal like nothing happened. Shrug it off, but wait until you are around her friends to start hitting on them... don't make it too obvious

If she did get fucked by this other guy then she doesn't give a fuck about you and you shouldn't give a fuck about her. Use her as a point of contact for other girls.

[Perseus]

Either she's using you as an EGO BOOST as Jackhammer pointed out, OR you missed all the signals she was giving you. We can't read the situation beyond words, however, personally i think you should've went caveman on her when she was on top you, grab her, flip her on her back, you be on top, solid eye contact, a smirk, and kiss, etc.

What's the worst that can happen? she rejects you? big whoop, bang one of her girlfriends ON HER BED, she will definitely know (women talk to each other all the time), and VICTORY! its not like you'll be in college forever.

I'm in college too

[Giovonny]

Dude, you can fuck her.

Next time you guys are drunk and she is touching on you, touch her back.

You should have gone for the make out when you guys were laying in bed together. Who cares is she says..."matt is sleeping her tonight". She might have been just toying with you to see how you would react. Maybe, if you would have gone for the makeout, "Matt" would have been the one who went home.

Don't accept your place in the friends zone.

You are keeping yourself in the "friends zone" just as much as she is putting you there. She is giving you opportunities to get out. You gotta be more aggressive!

What have you got to lose? Nothing but a "friend" who is not gonna bang you. Do you really want her as a platonic friend? If your not gonna try to fuck her or one of her friends/cousins, why the hell are you hanging out with her?

[Knowledge Seeker]

Thanks for the replies guys. Definitely gonna try to be more aggressive next time.

My main problem has always been closing. I am already good at building attraction with girls but whenever it comes to the end game, that's where I tend to struggle.