[Dyonisos]

This was so easy approach it happnes very rarely. I approached girl standing with her friends with generic comment: "thats a interesting style." Girl immadiately introduce herself to me. I start talking to her and she suggested to go in some more quite place away from dancefloor. Perfect!

We had some nice conversation and finally exchanged number. Then we went back to ourfriends. Later on we met again and i took her at dancefloor. I started to escalate and finally I touched her cheek with my mouth. She "sorry" and left me on the dancefloor right away. WTF?

I found her later and told her she shouldnt left me at the dancefloor like that.
She replied she didnt like guys making out with her at dancefloor. I replied: "i am sorry that I am not a gay" She started to argue and eventually I apologized her for being too sexual. i made it in humorous manner but still. I said that i will make sure we keep distance and wont invade her personal space even if she begs me to do it.



I texed and called her next day and she didnt answer the phone.

I think that i made a mistake of apologizing her for being too sexual. I should stick to my guns no matter what.

Do you think is it a case?

[herpaderpa]

I don't know man, it doesn't sound like you did anything 'wrong'. Some chicks are just wack. A sarcastic overdone apology with a cocky grin is what I would have done too.

[Amour Fou]

Quote:

This was so easy approach it happnes very rarely. I approached girl standing with her friends with generic comment: "thats a interesting style." Girl immadiately introduce herself to me. I start talking to her and she suggested to go in some more quite place away from dancefloor. Perfect!

Nice start. Seemingly, you had it all working for you, it was more about "not doing anything wrong" than gaming per se.

Quote:

We had some nice conversation and finally exchanged number. Then we went back to ourfriends. Later on we met again and i took her at dancefloor. I started to escalate and finally I touched her cheek with my mouth. She "sorry" and left me on the dancefloor right away. WTF?

Geez. Very bad move: isolating and -asking for a number-. Going for the number is the very last resort, after everything else, and even then not sure if it is worthwhile, but it depends which kind of pickup evironment you are working on. Where I'm from (Brazil) picking a phone number is a completely needless endeavour. Even then, it is always a bad move, you should always push for the makeout. You completely lose momentum by just going for the number while still on the venue with her. No building up tension, no mystery.

Why did you kiss her on the cheek? Did she turn her face? Otherwise you should have gone straight for the lips. And when she said sorry, you should interpret that as BS and push it. She seemingly gave you IOIs, but you missed it out by not displaying enough dominance and being too passive.

Quote:

I found her later and told her she shouldnt left me at the dancefloor like that.
She replied she didnt like guys making out with her at dancefloor. I replied: "i am sorry that I am not a gay" She started to argue and eventually I apologized her for being too sexual. i made it in humorous manner but still. I said that i will make sure we keep distance and wont invade her personal space even if she begs me to do it.

Being "nice" and apologetical the way you did is a complete buzzkill and turn off. You let her trample you right there. That was the exact moment her legs completely sealed off.

"I'm sorry that I am not gay" is a bad line, the way I see it. Why would you have "gay" in your frame of reference? Don't say "I'm not gay", that just comes off wrong.

"Won't invade her personal space"? You just fell for her hysteria, you didn't pass her test. That was what exactly what she wanted to, but you just was too much of a "nice boy" and couldn't read between the lines. Deep down all she could want was for a MAN (not a boy) to trample over her resistances.

-Learn how to read between the lines.-

Quote:

I texed and called her next day and she didnt answer the phone.

I think that i made a mistake of apologizing her for being too sexual. I should stick to my guns no matter what.

Do you think is it a case?

Not surprising she didn't answer the phone. She lost all attraction (due to your "niceness" and decorum) and she had no mystery (due to you going for the phone instead of going for -her- while still hanging around) to get her imagination going.

Funny thing is, I doubt she (and all girls) even realise all those variables come by while screening for a guy.

But now you know.

Learn how to read between the lines. What a girl says she wants is -never- what she really wants and not even they are aware of that most of the time.

Did she see you hitting on other girls while in front of her? That would be a good move. Try it often.

And, of course... whenever you catch yourself obsessing and overthinking about one girl it screams:

-she's game over
-you should be approaching more, much more.

Keep it up!

[elabayarde]

GOOOD ANALYSIS Amour Fou.

[Samseau]

Amour Fou nails it.

You had a lack of confidence and you didn't escalate properly and smoothly.

Don't worry man, you'll do it better the next time you try. And you'll still fuck it up. Then you'll try it again, get a bit farther, and then fuck it up again. Keep trying, and you'll see what works.

[Dyonisos]

little update: she texted me back today. Anyway, Amor Fou - your post its still so much valid- thanks. There is definitely a point in participating in forum if you can get feedback like that.

(02-19-2012 07:20 PM)Amour Fou Wrote:  

Quote:

This was so easy approach it happnes very rarely. I approached girl standing with her friends with generic comment: "thats a interesting style." Girl immadiately introduce herself to me. I start talking to her and she suggested to go in some more quite place away from dancefloor. Perfect!

Nice start. Seemingly, you had it all working for you, it was more about "not doing anything wrong" than gaming per se.

Quote:

We had some nice conversation and finally exchanged number. Then we went back to ourfriends. Later on we met again and i took her at dancefloor. I started to escalate and finally I touched her cheek with my mouth. She "sorry" and left me on the dancefloor right away. WTF?

Geez. Very bad move: isolating and -asking for a number-. Going for the number is the very last resort, after everything else, and even then not sure if it is worthwhile, but it depends which kind of pickup evironment you are working on. Where I'm from (Brazil) picking a phone number is a completely needless endeavour. Even then, it is always a bad move, you should always push for the makeout. You completely lose momentum by just going for the number while still on the venue with her. No building up tension, no mystery.

Why did you kiss her on the cheek? Did she turn her face? Otherwise you should have gone straight for the lips. And when she said sorry, you should interpret that as BS and push it. She seemingly gave you IOIs, but you missed it out by not displaying enough dominance and being too passive.

Quote:

She wasn't ready for the kiss in the lips. I just wanted to escalate intimacy first. And there was no time to push at the time as she amlost ran away from the dancefloor.

Quote:

I found her later and told her she shouldnt left me at the dancefloor like that.
She replied she didnt like guys making out with her at dancefloor. I replied: "i am sorry that I am not a gay" She started to argue and eventually I apologized her for being too sexual. i made it in humorous manner but still. I said that i will make sure we keep distance and wont invade her personal space even if she begs me to do it.

Being "nice" and apologetical the way you did is a complete buzzkill and turn off. You let her trample you right there. That was the exact moment her legs completely sealed off.



"I'm sorry that I am not gay" is a bad line, the way I see it. Why would you have "gay" in your frame of reference? Don't say "I'm not gay", that just comes off wrong.

"Won't invade her personal space"? You just fell for her hysteria, you didn't pass her test. That was what exactly what she wanted to, but you just was too much of a "nice boy" and couldn't read between the lines. Deep down all she could want was for a MAN (not a boy) to trample over her resistances.[/quote]

Yes, i shouldn't apologize for being a man. When i told her she shouldnt leave me at the dancefloor like that and she started arguing i should just ignore it and hold my frame. ex.

me: you shouldn't leave at the dancefloor like that
her: i dont like like guys trying to make out with me at the dancefloor.
me: its called desterion. Do you know what happens to dancefloor deserters? They end up as old maids with a herd of cats.


-Learn how to read between the lines.-

Quote:

I texed and called her next day and she didnt answer the phone.

I think that i made a mistake of apologizing her for being too sexual. I should stick to my guns no matter what.

Do you think is it a case?

Not surprising she didn't answer the phone. She lost all attraction (due to your "niceness" and decorum) and she had no mystery (due to you going for the phone instead of going for -her- while still hanging around) to get her imagination going.

Funny thing is, I doubt she (and all girls) even realise all those variables come by while screening for a guy.

But now you know.

Learn how to read between the lines. What a girl says she wants is -never- what she really wants and not even they are aware of that most of the time.

Quote:

Did she see you hitting on other girls while in front of her? That would be a good move. Try it often.

To be honest i always do opossite and try to not be seen by a girl i number closed when I am gaming other girls in the same venue.

And, of course... whenever you catch yourself obsessing and overthinking about one girl it screams:

-she's game over
-you should be approaching more, much more.

Keep it up!




[/quote]

Thanks again for taking your time and giving me a great feedback.